Chapter Four: Always, She Waits For You
"I'm sorry. Do I have the wrong town? I thought Regina Mills was the Mayor here," Emma states, sitting the car seat down on one of the tables in the diner but nobody moves, not even Snow, whom normally is swept up in baby fever. Rather, Charming only stands, his jaw clenched ever so tightly shut, wondering if Emma would notice that she shares the same chin as he. Snow stands, looking as fragile as ever, one hand on her protruding pregnant stomach, the other fidgeting at her side nervously, wondering if Emma would realize that they have the same smile. The teacher studies the face of the infant that is sitting before her, wrinkling her nose softly as a warm smile begins to tug upon her lips. She had only ever truly heard of this in old wives tales, in the pages of stories that her mother used to read to her as a child.
She had never truly seen the concept in practice until now.
"Uh, no. No, you're right. Regina is the Mayor of the quaint little town known as Storybrooke, which is where you are. Welcome. I'm your... I'm David," Charming struggles, holding his hand out toward his daughter. Smiling in return, Emma places her tiny hand within her father's, giving him the most reassuring squeeze as she shakes it ever so solemnly. Charming searches within his daughter's emerald eyes for something to change when their skin briefly meets. However, nothing truly changes, except for the smile upon Emma's face widens just a little bit more than before.
"Hi, David. I'm Emma. This is Henry," She wraps her arm around her son who awkwardly waves at the tall, blonde man before him, "and this is Reagan. These two munchkins are my kids. Or, so the doctors tell me. I am still convinced that this one is adopted." Emma jokes, picking her daughter up from the car seat, straddling the infant over her hip as Reagan looks around the diner, her fist being devoured inside of her mouth. Charming chuckles as he looks at the infant, a warmth growing inside of him that he cannot quite explain. This is his grandchild- his granddaughter whose other parent is… sighing with a soft shake of his head, he darts his gaze to Snow, who is staring at their daughter so affectionately and attentively.
"She's absolutely beautiful. How old is she?" Snow coos, stepping closer to their daughter, despite Charming's warning glare. Smiling, Emma runs her fingers through Reagan's dark curls, her eyes staying fixated upon her daughter's round face.
"Reagan is three months old. Technically, three months, two weeks and four days, but who's counting right?" Emma laughs nervously, bouncing the little girl on her hip, "for a very long time, it was just Henry and I, you know? For twelve years, I had my own little Prince Charming to take care of me. It is only fitting that I now have my own little princess to keep us all in line. Although I'd swear she's more of the Evil Queen most days." Emma jokes with a laugh but neither her parents crack a smile at the stumbling admission. Instead, the smile that had been upon their lips once before slowly fades away and Snow looks at her husband dishearteningly. Nodding his head quietly, Charming calls Ruby for a few cups of coffee and the waitress politely obliges, bringing cups of coffee and a glass of chocolate milk for Henry.
"So, Emma..."
"Can I hold her?" Both Snow and Charming speak in unison, creating the utmost confusion for the blonde. Glaring at his wife, his brows arched together in the most stern, disapproving look, the deputy let out a disgruntled huff. While he knows just how much his wife's heart aches for the time that she lost with Emma, and how much she mourns all the opportunities that she lost out upon, he knows this is anything but a good idea. This baby, it is not just Emma's baby, it's a mixture of both light and dark, it has the potential for both greatness and absolute evil.
"Snow. We can't. You know that she belongs to…"
"Sure," Before Snow has a second to dispute her daughter's answer, a three month old infant is being passed into her arms. Reagan giggles at the sudden passing, her hands gently patting Snow's face carefully. Looking down into her granddaughter's eyes, Snow feels a warmth fluttering inside of her. She is the perfect mixture of all the trials and tribulations they have overcame in the past year. She is the mixture of the most painful past and the most promising future. Reagan has her nose, she sighs softly as she studies the infant, and she even has her jaw structure. But everything else, every other trait that the beautiful infant possesses, belongs entirely to someone else.
"Hi there, sweet, sweet Reagan." Snow coos, her thumb gently brushing against Reagan's jawline as the infant stares up at her so contently, "I know that you do not know me but my name is Mary Margaret. My friends sometimes call me Snow. Either would be perfectly fine. I hope that you enjoy Storybrooke. A lot of people think of this place as home. Maybe you will too." She whispers, placing a soft kiss upon her head, an action that receives a squeal from Reagan in response as she gently taps Snow's face.
"I'm sure you will change your mind soon. She's not always this cute and cuddly, I promise. Most of the time, she's quite the evil little thing. Always reigning terror on me and her poor brother. Right, kid?" Emma questions, ruffling Henry's hair and the twelve year old only shrugs, taking a long swig of the chocolate milk in front of him.
"She's a handful. But she's a baby. That's what babies do. Did you know that studies show that you would not be so frustrated all the time if you had a partner to help you out? Like my dad or her dad," Henry shrugs, taking another long drink of his chocolate milk before he wipes his mouth onto his sleeve, "nobody is ever meant to do something like this alone. Right, Mary Margaret?" The boy asks with an arch of his eyebrow, a look so devious written upon his face of normal innocence that Snow swears that she is looking into the face of Regina Mills herself. It is always been something that is quite ironic, Snow bemuses to herself, that the son of her own daughter and Bae can look so much like his adoptive mother. Glancing frantically at her husband who only stares back at her with a stern look upon his face, Snow's lips tremble as words fail to escape from her. Gently rocking the baby within her arms, she lets out a nervous chuckle with a gentle shrug of her shoulders.
"Oh Henry. You are quite the observant little fella, aren't you? But I couldn't voice my opinion in this situation at all. I think that single parenthood is a very admirable choice. Your mother seems to be taking very good care of you and your sister. You both seem well fed, and clothed and h-happy. Besides, you shouldn't ask that question to a complete stranger. I barely know your mother, I can't tell you that…" However, Snow is interrupted by Henry who lets out a laugh all of his own. There's a flicker within his dark eyes, a flicker of deviance, and of absolute honesty.
"Bull. You know my Mom. You know me, and you know the truth about Reagan. You know, don't you?" Henry pushes for the admission of the truth. In that moment as Snow looks deep within the eyes of her grandson, she realizes that nothing is quite what it seems. This town has always been a very magical one; however, she never could have guessed that crossing back over this town line would have changed Henry's life completely. The spell, the mystery, the forgotten… well, apparently, the young boy all but remembers every little detail now.
"What is he talking about?" Emma asks, looking between the both of her parents. At the sound of her mother's voice, Reagan lets out a grunt, catching the gaze of her grandmother. Gently, her chubby hand pats Snow's face affectionately, a wide, gummy smile appearing upon her beautiful face.
"I-I have no idea. You.. you know how kids are. They… they have such a creative imagination," Snow stumbles, bouncing the three month old in her arms, "and they can convince themselves that their imagination is reality. It's really an interesting phenomenon. I wish that we could still have that kind of imagination at our age. I think the world would be a much better place, don't you?" The dark haired woman chuckles awkwardly, looking at her husband for some kind of assistance. However, Charming is lost in his own world of studying his daughter and grandchildren, searching for some type of answer to a question that had never truly been spoken.
"It isn't silly!" Henry snaps, slamming his hand down on the table, causing the chocolate milk glass to shake beneath his voice. The sudden outburst from her brother causes Reagan to flinch, and almost immediately, an onset of tears begin to spill from her eyes.
"Henry!" scolds Emma.
"Oh honey. Shh. It's okay! Your brother didn't mean to scare you!" Snow quickly reacts, her hand gently gliding along the three month old's back as she gently rocks her within her arms. However, it is to no avail as Reagan continues to sob the second most heart wrenching cry that Snow has ever heard.
The first?
Well, that belonged to the three month old's mother. For, the sound of infant Emma's wailing as David whisked her away to the magic wardrobe all of those years ago has been something that has ever haunted Snow in the most painful of ways.
"Hey, buddy. It's okay. We all understand," Charming comforts, placing his hand upon his grandson's shoulder. My, how he had missed those days of himself and Henry getting into mischievous adventures and ignoring the looming trouble that always lied within the distance of his two mothers and Charming's own wife. He missed those days when things were innocent and carefree. He missed those days when he had the chance of being a parent to him, unlike what had occurred with Emma. However, the boy is having none of it as he shakes his head, pulling away from his grandfather, disgruntled.
"No. That's exactly it. You do understand. You know the truth! You know about Reagan and you know about Regina! You know that she is-"
"Henry Swan!" Emma snaps, pushing herself up from the table, glaring down at her preteen son that sits beneath her. Both Charming and Snow share at glance with one another at the sound of his last name, mouthing 'Swan' to one another with the utmost confusion written upon their faces. When Regina wiped Emma's memory, she certainly had made sure that there was no trace of Storybrooke or herself to remain, so much so that their own son did not share her last name any longer.
"But Mom!"
"No buts! I don't know what has gotten into you, kid, it sure as hell needs to find it's way out! If Mary Margaret and David don't want to play your games with you, then I suggest you leave them alone! We are new to this town and we don't even have a place to stay yet. These nice people invited us to have coffee with them and to help me find who I was sent here to look for so that we can go home. You don't get to march in here like you own the whole damn world and start making demands to someone that you don't even know like some kind of prince. I suggest you change that attitude of yours and you change it very fast," Emma demands, a sudden new wave of authority raging within her voice. At the sight of their daughter reacting like an actual parent, both of the Charmings are taken aback. After all, until this point, it had always been Regina who had been a little rough around the edges with Henry, and it had been Regina who was never afraid to lay down the line with her son in order to raise him as a gentleman.
Looking down at the infant that has now snuggled deep within her shoulder, Snow cannot help but feel her heart grow nearly three sizes. Perhaps this is it, she sighs happily as she allows her fingers to dance across the dark curls upon her head. Perhaps this is her second chance at being the mother for Emma that she truly never got to be. Perhaps now she is meant to save the day, if not for the infant that she sent through the wardrobe, but for the infant that is the product of her and the woman that had been the reason that she sent her daughter away at all.
"You could… you could stay with us," Snow whispers so quietly that it almost misses everyone's ears. Everyone, except, for Emma.
"Snow, you can't." David scolds through clenched teeth but the woman pays him no attention, her wide eyes purposefully fixated upon the face of her very surprised daughter.
"You can't be serious. I mean I… I…." Emma's voice trails off nervously as her eyes dart between her two parents before landing back upon the face of her mother. At this, Snow only smiles gently back her, fingers continuing to trace the curls upon the infant's head, "you aren't serious, are you?"
"Y-Yeah. I mean, we have the extra room. David and I bought a huge loft. Honestly, I couldn't tell you why. I think we expected to have a huge family or to have more friends or something. But, it never really happened. It's pretty quiet in our house with just the two of us. In fact, sometimes I even have to turn the television on to keep myself from going completely crazy when David goes to work. I know that I could definitely use the company. And we actually don't live that far from the Mayor's office, so, you would be able to work with Regina any time that you needed to. You don't have to feel pressured or anything, though. If you don't want to stay with us, it is totally fine and I won't be offended, I promise. In fact, Granny runs a great bed and breakfast and I am sure that she wouldn't mind putting you three up for a while. It just seems like since you have a baby and all, that you might need a little more...space and another set of helping hands," Snow offers, her eyes glistening with hope and optimism. At this, the blonde savior just nods her head, confusion written within her face.
"Uh yeah. That would be great, actually. If you're sure. I mean, I do come with some baggage. And Reagan isn't always this quiet." Emma states, her eyebrows arched together in confusion. Smiling in return, Snow nods her head, a quiet hum in the back of her throat.
"Nonsense. Besides, in case it isn't obvious, David and I could certainly use the practice. We want you to stay with us, Emma. All of you." smiles Snow, perhaps the first genuine and true smile that has ever graced her face since the day that Emma and Henry drove over their town line to perhaps never return. For this moment, no matter how brief, everything suddenly felt normal again. Her daughter is coming home to live with them, along with their two grandchildren. However, Snow could have never imagined that someone like Reagan Mills would exist within her life in such a way.
"Okay. But… first, I need to find Regina."
"I'm not so sure that is a good idea," Charming pipes up, nursing a long sip of his steaming hot coffee. Shaking her head as she tosses a bag over her shoulder, Emma only shakes her head, her blonde hair framing her face in such a way that the young man could not help but be reminded of the genetics the two of them share.
"I appreciate your concern, David. But I'm here on a mission. I am a bounty hunter. My boss sent me here because I am the best at what I do and he needed someone who was going to do a damn good job at catching the bad guys. There is a fugitive that is hiding out in your town and before I begin to tear her town apart, I need to let her know exactly what is going on." Emma replies, glancing between her two parents, "why are you guys being so secretive about her? Is she really that bad?" At this, both Charming and Snow let out a laugh before realizing that their daughter does not remember just how bad Regina Mills truly is. Sighing softly, Charming shakes his head as his pursed lips take another long swig of the coffee within his cup. Noticing her husband's sudden choice quietness, Snow decides that she is going to pipe up.
"No, no. She's not...bad. She's just… well… it's a complicated story, really. Let's just say that she does not take well to new people being in our town. Everyone that lives here has been here for a very long time. Either, we all moved here around about the same time or they were born here. She isn't the biggest fan of people just randomly showing up in her town without some kind of backstory or connection to the town. Are you sure that you want to do this today? Maybe you and the kids could get settled at our place first and then…"
"No." Emma shakes her head, looking at her mother with a heavy sigh, "I need to do this today. I have to get started as soon as possible. You're… you are more than welcome to take the kids to your place if you want. It's almost Reagan's nap time anyways. It will keep her from being so fussy. I am sure that Regina could give me directions to your place after our meeting. In my life, I have learned to not be afraid of many things. And I am certainly not afraid of one Madame Mayor. I mean, really, what is she really going to do? Banish me with her magical powers?" Emma jokes with a hearty laugh, a smile as wide as her entire face playing upon her delicate lips.
"That would be putting it lightly. It's better than what she did to her mother," Charming snorts with a roll of his eyes before he can catch himself. However, when Snow's foot meets his kneecap, he is suddenly very reminded of how unaware of the situation Emma truly is. Looking up at his wide eyed daughter, Emma seems to be very unphased, taking another long swig of her coffee.
"Seriously? She's that dark and twisty? Well, this should be fun." Emma snorts, the sarcasm evident in her voice. Snow does not have to look at her daughter to know just how hard she is rolling her eyes; after all, while Emma may not realize it yet, she shares far too many mannerisms with her princess mother. Looking down at the infant in her arms, Snow feels her heart nearly burst- despite her own circumstances with Regina Mills, she could not ignore the fact that Regina had brought her daughter home again- and with a daughter of her own.
"Maybe you can save her." Snow pipes up, referencing her daughter's savior status. Snow White had done everything everything her power to make sure that her daughter was born to save people- to be the product of true good. And perhaps there is not a person in more need of saving than one miss Regina Mills.
"Look lady, I don't know who you think I am, but I can barely save myself most days. And I sure as hell can't save someone else. I'm not Prince Charming. I don't just save damsels in the best thing you can do for the ship is to let it sink. There's a beauty in the wreckage, after all." Emma replies with a wrinkle of her nose, grabbing her bag from the table and quickly tossing it over her shoulder. In a moment, her red leather jacket is adorning her muscular, yet petite, body, and for a moment, it is as if no time has passed in Storybrooke. Emma is still in her red leather outfit, with the same golden hair and the look of determination in her eyes.
There just one difference.
And at three months old, she is a pretty big one.
"Every story needs a hero, Emma."
"But sometimes there isn't a happy ending. Sometimes the hero doesn't win. Sometimes the villain does," Emma replies and Snow can taste the fear and worriment in her mouth. She had seen what kind of monster her step mother could be without Emma- she isn't so sure that their town could survive much more of this Evil Queen.
"That's what I am afraid of." Snow mutters under her breath, thinking no one would hear her. But, when Emma's face contort in confusion, Snow realizes that she should have known better. After all, this spitfire is entirely too much like her.
"Excuse me?"
"108 Mifflin Street. You can find Regina there. It is two blocks away from here and you will take a left. It's the huge luxury house that looks like it was hand picked straight from a fairytale. You can't miss it. We are just a block over when you are finished. I'm sure Regina will give you directions. Just...prepare yourself. It has been a really hard year for her. She lost her son and daughter. And...someone incredibly, although unreasonably, special to her, " David explains, nursing his coffee. At the statement of someone special, Henry clears his throat, his eyes staring into Emma's, "she hasn't quite recovered from losing the most important people in her life." Davis shares a glance with his wife, who only nods through her teary eyes.
"As someone who has lost a child herself, I know how much Regina is hurting. But you can do this, Emma. I have faith in you." Snow smiles through her tears and Emma nods, swaying awkwardly in front of the table. Biting her bottom lip nervously, her shy eyes find the comforting swirls of her mother's and the peace washes over the blonde in ways that she could not quite understand.
"Hey...uh...I just wanted to say..." Emma stumbles over her words in such a classic way that the same familiar red blush appears in her cheeks, "thank you. For...everything." And Snow suddenly isn't so sure that Emma is talking about the loft and babysitting the kids. However, when Snow opens her mouth to push her daughter on the statement, Emma quickly disappears through the door. Sighing deeply, Snow leans back in her seat, rocking Reagan softly in her arms.
"You know, don't you?" Henry pipes up in the silence and both Snow and Charming's head snaps up at the sound of the young boy's voice.
"Know what, bud?" Intrigues David and Henry simply rolls his eyes, leaning against his folded arms over the table.
"Cut the act, Grandpa. I know that you know that Mom is your daughter and that Reagan is Mom and Mom's kid. She is the product of true love- but of evil and good. It is why she has magic and I don't. She is the daughter of the Evil Queen and the Savior. The question is: what are we going to do about it?" Henry asks. Feeling his chest tighten and his hands clam up, David simply just stares at his wife as something very uncharming falls from his lips.
Regina Mills cannot remember the last time that her nose was not buried deep within books about magic, spells, and alternate realities. She knew Emma is not coming back, after all she had made damn sure of that when she wiped the Sheriff's memory of all things Storybrooke related. If Storybrooke never existed in the first place, then there would be nothing for Emma to return home to. However, what she had forgotten was to erase her own memory of the past decade.
They say to have a child is to have your heart walk around on the outside of your body. Growing up with Cora as her mother, Regina never truly paid this any attention. But the second that Henry started walking, and started walking away from her, Regina realized how true it actually was. Now, that her son has no memory of her and is states away, this is even more so true. Every morning she wakes up with an ache in her heart and a lump in her throat. Every time that she passes by his room, sees his drinks still in the fridge, sees his favorite show on television, she swears that she is not going to survive to see another day.
But, it is one blonde haired sheriff that Regina might just miss most of all. It had happened so suddenly; like a fire in which one falling ember can engulf the entire forest. Some people might say it was a slow burning romance; but for Regina, it had been the most captivating passion. Every time that the mother of her son had been around, her stomach had been on fire; words were a jumbled mess in her head; Emma Swan had been like a drug.
A drug that Regina Mills did not know that she needed to survive until she no longer had it within her possession.
She had always been strong, independent, hard headed, and so fiercely brave that Regina had never needed anyone. After all, the last time that she needed someone, her mother lunged her hand into his chest and ripped out his heart in front of her. She had swore that she would never hurt herself or anyone else like that ever again. But here she is, running on an hour of sleep every night, if she is lucky to even get that much before the night terrors take her over. Here she is, thin as a rail, circles under her eyes, and...weak.
Regina Mills had never been weak.
But then Emma happened.
And left.
And now every move the dark haired woman makes is so much of a struggle. Now, even breathing takes so much effort that sometimes she contemplates if it would just be easier if she didn't. But she knows she is better than that, she is better than someone who just gives up.
Surrendering isn't in the makings of a great queen, anyways.
A great queen tries to find solutions to the problem by any means necessary. Whether that is by casting a curse that ripped everyone from their happily ever after, to ripping out their hearts with her bare hands. Regina knew the solution to this problem wasn't a human one, but rather, a magical one. It was in potions and forces that Regina knew she was cursed have. Magic brought her into this mess, so surely, magic could bring her out of this.
In her hands, she is holding a vial of green liquid. It smells obnoxiously terrible and the foam that dances around the top almost makes Regina's stomach churn. In this vial lies the power to forget the past decade with her son. But more importantly, this liquid contained the power to forget Emma Swan.
The power to forget her snark, her shy smile, her slightly idiotic mouth, the small of her back, the tattoo on her rib cage, and the way her eyes flush with passion at a quarter around midnight. It allows her to forget the way that their bodies move together, the way she fills all of Emma and the way that Emma consumes her, like blood rushing through her veins. She wants to forget, because if she forgets everything, maybe it won't hurt so bad every morning that she wakes up alone.
Maybe if she can forget that she has a heart, she will forget how it feels to have her heart shattered.
"I guess it is now or never, right?" Regina asks herself, looking down at the photo of herself, Emma and Henry last Christmas. Henry's smile is structured so much like his mother's and Regina can't help but to notice this. She has almost forgotten what it is like to see that childlike wonder in her son's eyes, she has almost forgotten what it is like to have someone look at her like she is more than the monster from her past. Henry had never looked at her like a villain, and neither had his mother. Despite the fact that she had been the reason Emma was sent through the wardrobe in the first place and never got to know her parents, Emma always looked at her like she deserved her happy ending. It just took Regina far too long to realize who her happy ending truly was.
"I am sorry, my loves. But it is for the best. You won't realize that because you don't remember me but you are better off this way. Granted, you are a little more fortunate than my last love. At least you did not have your heart ripped out of your chest. But I am sure that even that would have hurt less than losing the two of you. Please know that I don't want to forget your smiles or the way that you say my name. I don't want to forget how much I love you. But I can't keep living like this. I can't keep living with the ghost of you." Regina whispers, her voice cracking as she gently runs her fingers across their faces.
Glancing up, she catches her reflection in the mirror and she can't recall the last time that she looked this lost since Daniel died. Starting at her fragile eyes in the mirror, Regina barely recognizes herself. Stuffing deeply, Regina raises the vial to her mouth when a fluttering memory appears in her mind.
"Regina, shh." Emma giggles against her lips as Regina slams the door to her office behind the two of them, "you wouldn't want to wake the kid." She mumbles against her lips, her hands roaming Regina's womanly figure, stopping just at her waist, her nails digging effort in her skin, receiving a moan from the dark haired woman in return.
"If he interrupts us, I will banish him." Regina mutters, her hands making quick work of the jacket and tank on the blonde's body. Spilling them onto the floor, Regina's nails scratch deeply down Emma's ribs, her lips dancing along her jawline.
"Honey, you can't banish our son." Emma moans, tilting her neck as Regina nips at her pulse point.
"Just watch me. I am the Evil Queen. I get whatever I want. And right now all I want is you." Regina grows, lifting Emma into the desk.
And well, when Emma moans her made at the sensation of her mouth against her center, the topic is dropped.
The shattering of the vial against the mirror crashes Regina back into her reality, the reality that no longer has an Emma or a Henry.
Goddamn it.
She can't forget Emma Swan. Not when she is the only person to ever make her feel this alive; not when she is the only person to make her want to be better. She can't forget Emma when Emma is everything to her.
Everything.
Forgetting her would be like forgetting how to breathe- impossible.
Regina can feel the breakdown just on the verge of her eyelids, as the tears burn within them, when there is a knock on her door. Wrinkling her brow in confusion, Regina glances at her watch.
Visitors? At this hour?
Grumbling as she makes her way to the door, Regina has perfected the disapproving look, and the bitchy tone is waiting in her throat to escape. The Evil Queen wants and needs no one; how dare someone suggest otherwise.
Opening the door with a disgruntled groan, Regina's eyes quickly scan the back of her guest.
Brown leather boots.
Dark skinny jeans.
A tank top.
A red leather jacket.
Wavy, but ever so messy, blonde hair.
Suddenly, Regina's mouth is dry and her heart is in her throat. It almost looks like... but it couldn't be... she erased her memory... it's been over a year.
However, when the stranger turns around, Regina swears that she can feel the world stop spinning on it's axis, she can hear the clock in the town chime at the change of the hour, and she can feel herself breathe for the first time in a year.
"Hi, Regina." Emma shyly smiles, leaning against the door frame and a new onset of tears appear in Regina's eyes at the sound of her name leaving Emma's perfect lips.
"Hello, Emma."