Chapter 117

"I can't do this, Arizona." Callie said, walking back and forth in their room. "How in the world could be even ask me to do that?"

"You can." She sat on the edge of the bed and watched her wife walk a path on the rug in the guest room they were staying it at her in-laws.

"No I can't." She shook her head. "How can he even think I could do something like that."

"He would never ask you to do something he knew you couldn't do."

"It's tomorrow. I can't have anything ready that fast." The brunette shook her head. "How can I do this?" She stopped and looked at her wife. Grateful that Aria had the baby because she would have for sure disturbed her up with her freak out.

"You can do anything." Arizona tried to assure her.

"Not this."

"Calliope, yes you can." She stood up.

"I can barely hold it together when someone mentions her name. How the hell can I sing at her funeral without looking like a blubbering fool."

"Cal." She walked closer and ran her hand up her arm. "You can do this." She nodded.

"I really can't, Arizona."

"Come here." Arizona lead her to the bed and signaled for her to sit. Carlos and his brothers and sisters had went earlier in the day to make the funeral arrangements and unbeknownst to them, Maria had already preplanned her parting. "Your dad isn't asking because he wants this." She said, kneeling before her wife.

"What are you saying?"

"He told me when he got back, that your Nana has everything planned out already. And she had requested for you to write a song and sing it."

"No." She said, jerking her hand out of the blondes and wiping the tiredness out of her face. "Why would she do that?"

"He said that she loved the song you wrote and sang to me at our wedding and she wanted something like that."

"Arizona." She sighed. "I can't. It took me months to come up with that song. There is no way I can come up with something this fast."

"You said it only took you twenty minutes."

"Yeah, but it took months for the words to come to me."

"I think that if you put your heart into it, you'd have something written in fifteen or twenty minutes. You always say you're not good with words, but you're always the one melting my heart with what you say."

"Even if I could write it, there's no way I could sing it. I can't stand in front of everyone and sing with no music."

"Okay." Arizona thought for a minute. "How about you just pick a song and sing it?" She asked as her wife shook her head. "You know you're being stubborn." She said as her wife gave her her famous glare. "She wanted to you to sing. She loved your voice almost as much as I do, but.." She smiled. "..no one will ever hear my favorite pitch you hit." She teased trying to lighten the mood.

"What's that?"

"You singing my name in bed." She winked at her.

"You're awful." She laughed.

"Maybe." She shrugged. "I'd like to see this as her last hoorah with you." She couldn't help but chuckle.

Callie scoffed. The blonde was probably right, her grandma wanted to test her again and this was a way to do it one last time. "She would do something dirty like that, wouldn't she?" She agreed. "But I don't know what to sing."

"I'll help you decide." Arizona stood up from her kneeling position and sat down beside her wife.

"Okay."

"Did she used to sing anything while you were growing up?"

"Well yeah..but I can't remember any of them right now." The brunette put her head in her hands trying to think.

"What about her favorite song?"

"Again I don't know." She whined, laying back on the bed.

"Don't make me say it again so soon." Arizona propped herself up beside her as she looked down to her wife.

"Say what?" She said, laying her arm across her eyes.

"You're killing me smalls."

"You're killing ME... smalls." Callie pushed her away and rolled on her side to face her wife. "There was a song I used to walk around singing sometimes." She tried to think as she played with the button on Arizona's shirt.

"What was it called?" The blonde asked, placing her hand on the brunettes hip.

"I can't remember." She said, trying to remember some of the lyrics. "When she heard me singing it she'd stop everything she was doing and just listen. Every time I hear it I think of her."

Maybe that's the song you should sing then."

"I don't know if I can..." She paused. "Think of it." She said, remembering the song. "Grace."

"Grace?"

"Yeah, that was the name. I don't..." She shook her head. "It's a sad song, I don't know if I could get through it without falling apart."

"I'm sure you could do it. If it's what she wanted, I know you can. Besides, everyone will be falling part right along with you." She brushed the brunettes hair out of her face.

"Maybe. I'll tell daddy I'll think about it. I can't make no promises."

"Okay." Arizona agreed. She wouldn't push the matter any further.

"I'm going to find mi Mija." Callie sat up in the bed. "I need some baby time."

"And I need something to snack on."

"Hey, Arizona?" Callie's cousin called to her as she walked from the kitchen to the family room.

"What's up?" She asked as she chewed on her strawberry.

"Do you get a little on the side?"

"What are you talking about?" She asked confused.

"I saw how you and Callie were hanging all over each other in there." He pointed where her wife was still seated around the counter with her aunts and their baby. "There is no way you get along so well and are 'so in love' as Nana put it. So tell me how do you do it? Do you have an open relationship?"

"An open relationship?" She was offended. "You're kidding right?" She hoped she heard wrong.

"No. I'm serious."

Stunned. She couldn't believe she was being asked that. "There is no open relationship! That is what's wrong with this world today. Everyone thinks it's okay to sleep around with every Tom, Dick and Harry and still have someone to come home to every night. Hell no, that's not what a relationship is. If she wanted an open relationship I wouldn't be with her or vice versa. You don't treat the person you love like that. If you love someone they're the only person you want to be with emotionally and physically."

"You two are so happy all the time it's sickening. There's something more there and it's can't be just because you both are lesbians."

"Oh god." Arizona sighed. "Javy." She didn't understand a lot of peoples thinking these days when it came to relationships. "First off, why does our love have to have a title? I'm just a girl that is in love with another person."

"I'm not saying anything bad about that. I'm saying how do you have the perfect relationship Nana always went on and on about? Is it because you're gay?"

"Because I'm gay?" She laughed. "I don't love Callie more.. because I'm gay." She told him.

"So you're saying if she was really a dude you'd still love him?"

"If Callie was a man... with a penis, a five o'clock shadow, deep voice and no boobs." She thought for a minute before she answered that question. "Yes." She nodded. "I'm not with her because of her sex. She's just a person that enthralled me from the first day I met her. If she had been a man I think I would have still been attracted in some way. We've just had this strong connection from the start. But can I just say, I am so glad she is a woman. A surgeon at that.." She nodded. "One that's really skilled with her hands." She laughed when he scrunched his face.

"Eww.. that's gross. She's my cousin." Javier said, trying to shake the image Arizona put in his mind.

"And she's my wife." She smiled.

"But how do you make it work? There has had to been times when you wanted to throw in the towel."

"Well, I come from a family that doesn't believe in divorce. If you can't spend a lifetime with someone you shouldn't marry them. Marriage is a sacred bond that shouldn't be broken until death. Don't get me wrong, a relationship doesn't come without its fights. Callie and I have had our share, but I was raised that if something was broken, you fix it instead of throwing it out with the trash. You can't walk out when things are hard. Sometimes we take a break. She'll go to the study or in the theatre room and cool off while I'll go outside in the back yard and do the same because let's face it, we're both passionate people and hate being wrong. But after we're done cooling off, we talk it out. You have to hear each other out and sometimes you have to agree to disagree. Why are you asking me all of this?" It wasn't that she didn't care to share because Javy was one of her favorites, but she didn't understand what he was really getting at.

"I don't know." He shrugged, meeting eyes with someone across the room. "Curious I guess."

"You're curiosity wouldn't be because of that young woman you keep eyeing over there would it?" She questioned when she caught him glancing at her as she smiled back.

"Yeah." He sighed. "We've been dating for a while and I really feel she's the one, but I'm scared."

"What are you scared of?" She asked as she saw Callie walk through the room with their seven week old in tow. Throwing her a wink as she glanced and smiled over at her before focusing back on her wife's cousin.

"My mom and her mom doesn't get along to well and my mom doesn't care much for Nina. That's her name." She looked back to Arizona. "So I'm conflicted. I feel like she's the one, but my mom doesn't like her because of her mom. It's complicated." He shook his head.

"No relationship is easy."

"Boy, do I know that. I couldn't even have her be here with me for my own Abuela's passing. Carmen invited her. My mom thinks it's fine to be friends but she doesn't approve of our relationship."

"Awe, I'm sorry. But at least she's here."

"Yeah."

"Javy, if she makes you happy it shouldn't matter what other people think."

"I don't want to upset my mom."

"So you're willing to sacrifice your own happiness for that?" She asked him, but didn't get an answer. "Listen, you can't live your life for other people. You have to live it for yourself."

"It's not that easy."

"You asked how Callie and I work so well. I have to love myself and love the world openly, but I also have that special place in my heart where no one will enter but her. I put her needs in front of my own, and she puts my needs in front of hers and we both put Charlee's needs above all else. We balance each other out in that way. It all comes natural. Our love doesn't come without its trials. I know you've heard your aunt and uncle talk about what all we've been through."

"Yeah."

"We've had to fight for what we have. There was a time or two that I thought I'd have to live without her and I couldn't bare the thought of ever losing her." She looked up at him sadly. "We've had a lot of fucked up shit happen to us in the three years that we've been together. But I wouldn't change a single thing. You know why?"

"Why?"

"We appreciate each other a little more, we respect each other more, support each other and most of all we love each other more after every single thing that's tried to rip us apart. We don't take each other for granted. I learned that you can't just tell someone you love them and call it a day. You have to show it, I make a point each day to show her how I feel as does she. And at the end of the day, she knows I love her and she loves me and that's all that matters." She said as she watched him contemplate things. "You're scared because your mom doesn't like her or her mom for some unknown reason, just imagine having to confess to your catholic parents that you fell in love with another woman."

"Man, that makes me feel like an idiot."

"You're not an idiot, you're just in love and you want your family's approval. There's nothing wrong with that." She said, turning her head and watching Nina and Carman talking. "Maybe you are. She's kinda hot." Arizona said. "Just don't tell Callie I said that." She laughed.

"I won't." He laughed. "As long as you keep your hands to yourself."

"These hands are only for my gorgeous goddess." She winked at him. "Screw everyone else, go claim your girl and take her out to the beach. If your mom loves you she will understand."

"Thanks Arizona." He leaned over and hugged her.

"You're welcome."

"Hey." Callie said, walking into the room again with Charlee now asleep on her arms. She was having a hard time putting the baby down in the last few days because the infant kept her mothers nerves calmer. "¿Cuántas veces tengo que decirte que se mantenga alejado de mi mujer?" (How many times do I have to tell you to stay away from my woman?"

"Callie." She laughed when Javier jumped up and went outside to his girl. "Come sit." She patted the cushion beside her.

"Scoot to the end, I want to lay." She said getting her wife to scoot over to the end of the leather sofa so she could lay her head in her lap.

"Better?" She patted her legs.

"Better." Callie said as she adjusted the baby to lay on her chest. "I'm so tired." She sighed, closing her eyes.

"I know you are." She said, combing her fingers through the brunette a hair. "Will you eat something for me?"

"I'm not..."

"Hungry." Arizona repeated the words Callie kept telling her over and over. "I know, but I'm trying to take care of you right now and it's hard because you're being stubborn. We all have a long day ahead tomorrow and you really need to eat to keep your strength up. Please, eat something, Calliope." She said, pushing her wife's head to face her. "For me, please?" She whispered as she continued to caress her head. They had been in Miami for well over twenty four hours and she had only managed to get the brunette to eat one small meal since arriving.

Sighing, she knew her wife was right. She was slightly hungry but she just didn't feel like eating anything, but she would give in and do so. "On one condition."

"What's that?"

"Take Charlee and I out to dinner.. alone. I want to get out of here. I just want to get away and forget about everything if only for an hour."

"I can do that for you." She leaned down to kiss her on the forehead. "Now get a little rest and then when you both wake up from your nap I'll take you anywhere you want to go."

"What if I say I want a big steak dinner?" She looked up to blue eyes that were hovering over her.

"Then my wife will get a big steak dinner." She laughed.

"Then I want lobster."

"Oh, going expensive on me."

"Well, we are surrounded by some of the best seafood places there are and if you're buying, I'm eating." She winked at her.

"Don't tell anyone, but I have my wife's debt card in my purse, so tonight dinner is on me." She whispered.

"Well let's just paint the town red then."

"We could." She winked.

"I think Charlee mentioned a boobies for dinner first though. Didn't you buggy?" She laughed, patting her daughters back.

"It's her favorite meal."

"Mmhmm.."

"It's also mommy's favorite too."

"Shut up." The brunette laughed. Grabbing her wife's hand, she laced their fingers together and laid them on their daughters backside. "I love her so much." She whispered kissing the top of the baby's head.

"Me too. I love her and her cute mommy." Arizona combed her fingers through brown hair.

"There she is." Lucia said coming up to her daughter and taking the baby off her chest. "Come to your Abuela." She cooed. "Your mommy has been hogging you lately and she won't let grandma have time with you."

"I'm not hogging her." Callie watched as her mom cuddled the baby. "She's a mommy's girls."

"That's true." Arizona agreed. "Just like mama." She kissed their joined hands.

"Well she's going to be Abuela's girl before she leaves here in a couple of days."

"Did someone say Abuelo's girl." Carlos walked up to his wife and took his granddaughter into his arms.

"I swear, the only way I'm going to get to spend time with her is if I kidnap her or lock her away in my room." She huffed.

"Mami?" She asked before the older Latina followed her husband through the house. "Arizona and I are going to go out for a little while to get away. We were going to take her with us, but if you want you can keep her?" She looked to the blonde to make sure it was okay.

"Yeah, if you want you can lock yourself away for a few hours." Arizona added.

"I'd be happy to watch her Mija. That'll give me a good reason why I can't pass her off to anyone. Just let me know." She winked at her daughter before leaving the room.

"You don't care do you?" Callie asked.

"Absolutely not, your mom and dad deserve more time with her. I hate that they don't get to see her more, plus it that means you want alone time with me." She winked at the brunette.

"I always want alone time with you."

"You okay?" She asked as she gently ran the tips of her fingers over her wife's forehead.

"For now." She nodded before rolling over on her side to face her wife.

"Well, here and now is all that matters. We'll take it one day at a time, okay?"

"Kay." She was barely audible. She couldn't believe how Arizona has stepped up and took control of everything and she couldn't be more thankful to have her wife right now. "I'm so tired of crying." Her voice was on the edge of breaking as she buried her face in the blondes stomach.

"I know baby." She whispered, trying to smooth her pain as she held her close. "I know it's hard Calliope, but it'll get easier." She whispered as Lucia watched from the corner of the family room as the blonde consoled her daughter. She had to wipe the tears that formed in the corners of her eyes as she watched her cry into her wife's stomach. Lucia was close to her mother-in-law but no one was as closer to her than Callie. There was no denying the bond her daughter and Maria shared even with all the distance between them and that was why she didn't have the heart to tell her daughter of her Nana's passing. She couldn't stand breaking her heart like that even though it wasn't right for her wife to have to tell her, but she knew Arizona was the only one who could handle her. Sure her and Carlos could have flew in to tell their daughter face to face, but Callie deserved to know sooner rather than later.

Taking a tissue from the corner table, she dried her eyes as she continued to watch her daughter-in-law try to ease her daughters burdens. Arizona never lost her focus on her sad wife as she whispered loving words and slowly ran her hand repeatedly over the brunettes head as her free hand remained laced with a tanned fingers.

"Everything will be okay Calliope." Arizona continued to whisper to her. "I know how hard this is, but through all your sadness you should be grateful. I know it's easy for me to say, but you should. She didn't have an ailment. She didn't have to suffer and I know it's hard honey, but that's a good thing." She tried to get her wife to understand. "I've seen suffering and it's bad, Cal." She shook her head. "Not that saying her not suffering isn't just as hard to lose her... I feel like I'm making no sense to you right now and am just rambling." She sighed. "What I'm saying is she didn't suffered. That going in your sleep is the best way to go."

"You're saying that at least I didn't have to watch her die for months." Callie mumbled into her wife's stomach.

"Yeah."

"You're terrible at trying to help right now you know that." She couldn't help but let out a small laugh at her wife's nervous rambling.

"I'm trying here." She shrugged. "Plus it made you smile if only for a second.

"Yeah." She sighed. "You are right. She didn't have to live in pain or anything and I am.. I'm so grateful for that. I couldn't stand to know she was suffering."

"You okay?"

"Yeah." She sniffed. "What do you say we go on out? Just get out of here and do some window shopping. We need to get Charlee an outfit for the funeral tomorrow."

"If that's what you want."

"Yeah. I think so." She sat up on the couch. "You want to feed her or use formula before we leave?"

"Use formula. Let your mom feed her, I'm sure she'd like that. Maybe that will satisfy her for a little bit."

"Yeah." She chuckled. "I'm going to go pry Mija outta someone's hands and take her to my mom, I'll meet you outside in ten?"

"Make it fifteen. I need to look good for my date." Arizona winked, leaving her wife standing there watching her disappear upstairs.

I used google translate. I hope it's correct.