Dang you guys are killing me with guilt here! I already feel bad for Shay and then you guys send me reviews saying how sad the last chapter made you feel. (seriously though, I always love the reviews) I'm actually glad you guys care enough about the characters that it made you sad.
Things are going to stay a bit sad for the next chapter or two but it will get better after that, I absolutely promise! (that and Sunstreaker threatened to hide my body if things didn't turn out good.)
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Waves slapped against slimy ocean-smoothed boulders in the beginning stages of dawn. As the far off shrieks of gulls and early birds floated above the choppy flow, fog drifted up from the water to smother whatever sturdy plant life had managed to grow by the salted and humid shore. The sun was not up yet but enough light reflected off the horizon to see by. It could barely be called morning. But if one were to come by the waters of the Atlantic and pass the rusted and crumbling metal poles of an decrepit oil rig twenty yards out then they'd hit the land. Skirting along the rocky crag of a coast would lead one a bit north and then they might just chance upon the much newer hydroelectric power plant. It stuck out from the local environment with all it's pale concrete and bright lights, but was situated into a little cove enough that the building itself wasn't that noticeable at first. The sound of spinning turbines could barely be heard above the rhythm of the briny sea-water.
Now the lights were out, glass crushed down and broken. A concrete wall of one of the industrious buildings was mangled and lacerations scarred what was left standing. The missing pieces were lying helter-skelter upon the ground like one throws lego blocks, irrelevant and ignored in the dark. Where people should have been, the control room, was abandoned and no human walked among the wreckage. They were either dead or had fled the scene a few hours earlier. It was eerily quiet save for the slap of waves, hum of engines and then disdainful words cut through the air. The surrounding silence and fading night demanded harsh whispers. Instead, like a slap to the face, it got a shout.
At this shattered building, at o'dark in the morning, a dispute grew louder.
"Well, why aren't you helping?!" An echoing mechanical voice belonging to Astrotrain resounded off the remaining walls. The purple and gray triplechanger let go of the energon cubes he was currently stacking and straightened so that he was glaring down at the seeker. Glimmering pink liquid that almost glowed in the pre-dawn light sloshed inside the containers as they clattered to the ground.
Starscream's scratchy high-pitched tone answered him with a sneer, "I am helping. I'm making sure you buffoons don't screw up. Obviously someone has to give orders."
The silent 'And that someone is me,' went unspoken but not unheard. Skywarp stopped what he was doing to watch, the upward tilt of black and violet striped wings giving away his anticipation for a fight. He raised his voice to side with his trine-mate.
"You tell him Screamy!" The encouragement wasn't appreciated and the lead seeker glared at Skywarp.
The last Decepticon merely sighed and continued to use the hydropower to fill up the empty cubes. Thundercracker stepped over rubble from one of the recently destroyed structures and grabbed a few more empty containers. Leave it to his teammates to argue instead of actually doing the job right. Megatron wasn't going to be happy when they were late. And he was already in a bad mood.
Flaring out his much larger wings in irritation, the triplechanger growled back, "Astrotrain will not do work if you will not Starscream."
Skywarp gave a quiet, "Oooooh buuuuuurn." which was promptly ignored. The red, blue and white Air Commander twitched his own aerial limbs up in intimidation and bared pointed denta. Crimson optics glowed brighter and became embers in the dark.
"I'm in charge you glitch-helm, so finish stacking and load up or I'll..."
Whatever threat he'd been thinking of was forgotten as a rather loud 'BOOM' of cannonfire resonated far too close for personal comfort. Starscream ducked his black helm just as a projectile shot past, nearly taking it off his shoulders. It took half a second for his processor to register that it was a cybertronian heavy artillery missile and that meant one thing: Autobots. Behind him, the shell hit the dirt with a tremor and left a scorching crater in the already coarse and bumpy ground.
A rust red tank rolled around the corner of a dirt track by a grouping of trees, treads crushing stone and branches underneath in loud snaps and pops, "BAMM! Now howdaya like that? BLAM!" A way too cheerful voice called.
Skywarp yanked out his blaster and squeezed off a few shots as Starscream shrieked orders. Their trine-mate dropped the cubes he'd been carrying and ducked behind a low crumbling wall to avoid Warpath's second shot. More Autobots appeared farther back behind the minibot.
A shrill cry rang out, "Astrotrain, jet mode! Skywarp load the energon cubes into his hold!"
The behemoth triplechanger looked ready to protest and fight the Autobots but Starscream was in charge and they did have to get the energon. After wasting a few precious seconds of processor power to figure out the commander's logic, Astrotrain transformed into his aerial mode and opened his cargo bay. Starscream had already turned back to shoot at the invading faction. Burst of light and blaster fire lit up the dark beach area and the first rays of real sunlight started to appear in the east. By now there was a half light to see by.
At the heels of Warpath came Smokescreen and Cliffjumper. The other red minibot had gotten a position by a copse of trees and was taking pot shots at the teleporter's vulnerable form, as Skywarp couldn't shoot back with his servos full of cubes. Thundercracker and Starscream fired in return from their prospective barriers as Smokescreen braked to a halt and transformed. Sandy dirt flew up in his wake.
"You were supposed to wait for us! We could have snuck up on them!" Snipped the unhappy praxian.
Warpath only chuckled, "Why sneak up on 'em when we can blast 'em sky high? BAM! KAPOW!"
Several more shots went off, one nearly destroying the blue seeker's self defense of deteriorating gray concrete and the other smashing very close to the large idling jet. Astrotrain growled at the proximity of the shot, cycling soggy and salted morning air through his vents. It wasn't audible over the sounds of battle. Starscream apparently had gotten over his surprise and decided he'd had enough. Taking to the rapidly brightening sky, he zipped upward before pulling a steep dive. A whistle split the air like a knife as the tri-colored form spiraled down and rained blaster fire upon the crouched forms. Warpath couldn't lift his cannon high enough and shifted forms for better aim. Even then, his shots were too slow and the flier easily dodged. Thundercracker's ammunition made them pull back a little farther and then the ultramarine jet leaped to the air as well.
With the seekers above, the Autobot couldn't take a go at the grounded jets as they had to watch the skies and their cover was significantly less useful. They knew it, the Decepticons knew it. And then something hit Starscream and the screechy red jet fell from the atmosphere.
Down went a metal blur until framing crashed into the ground with a horrendous shriek of metal on rock and sparks erupted. A small furrow wound through the dirt to where they landed and when the Air Commander looked up the sun had started to bath the misty water and wet land in it's light. Said rays reflected off shining red paint, a face he'd never thought he'd have to see again and a maniacal smirk. Starscream let out a cry of disbelief and shock before kicking the newcomer off him on pure reflex. Another shout, this one from above, as the blue seeker zipped over their heads. He nearly scoured the ground before pulling up and barrel rolling, trying to dislodge the golden being on his back. Thundercracker couldn't lift high enough before they crashed into one of the remaining buildings. Dust, mortar and smoke diluted out from the collapse like a cloud and Astrotrain sneezed to clear it out of his intakes.
The other Autobots had paused to catch a break and everyone stopped when Starscream had fallen. Optics turned to the second wreckage as the seeker lunged out first and bolted for his comrades. Another figure pushed itself up and stalked from the fallen structure with a terrifying look on his face. Skywarp looked back and forth between the two who had just entered the battle field and then dropped the energon he'd been loading into Astrotrain.
"Gggggghhhhooooosssttttsss!" A wail of alarm came from his vocalizer as he aimed his blasters at Sideswipe who was just a bit nearer.
By now the sun was most definitely up and could be seen above the tide. The fog started to slip away in the burning of the dawn. The sunrise glinted on the newly painted and glossed metal of the assailants and Starscream gaped as the carnelian pit-spawn gave an elegant bow without taking his optics off of them.
"Why yes, we are. My brother and I will haunt you all for the rest of your days." A lunatic grin graced his face plates.
The violet and black flier screamed, "Nooooooo!" in horror as TC valiantly resisted the urge to facepalm. And failed. Surely Skywarp wasn't that naive...? Apparently so.
Blasts came from the direction of the other Autobots as they pushed forward, Smokescreen letting out a whoop at the Twin's appearance. Astrotrain yelled at the other cons to get their afts in gear as several shots came too close to him and the seekers fired back at the crouched forms with blue optics. Starscream got up and ran closer to the other cons before he pushed his violet trine-mate back toward his task and aimed null rays at the Twins. Rage lit his features, as now they didn't have an air advantage. If they flew up, the frontliners would just go up after them and Warp and the triplechanger would have no cover. Nothing to stop the other three from taking the energon. They'd never get out of here with their cargo at this rate.
"You Were Dead!" the trine leader howled at his enemies. They ruined everything! And they had been dead! He had seen the Autobots trying to revive them on that field where the Constructicons had battled. The cassettes had made them selves useful and spied, finding out that their enemy was mourning. How the Pit were these slag-headed scrap heaps here!?
Sunstreaker surged at him with barely restrained anger, forcing the flier to narrowly miss getting his faceplates punched in, "Not yet we're not."
Their feet crushed structural fragments into the sand and rock as they twisted and lunged, trying to get an upper hand. More canon fire from Warpath left deep holes in the ground and one almost smashed into Astrotrain's left wing. The large flier had pretty much just stayed there so Skywarp could load the energon into his hold but decided that the 'sitting duck' routine was over and started his thrusters. Cliffjumper leaped around Thundercracker and blasted a lucky shot at the exposed cubes that had not yet been loaded but were stacked on the ground like a pile of grenades just waiting to be set off. It was a wonder that a stray shot hadn't hit them yet. But now several fragmented into fire and metal shards. Astrotrain roared at the detonation heat suddenly scorching his side and rolled forward. Engine thundering, he took off from the ground and ignored Starscream's furious shout.
Outnumbered and realizing they couldn't win, the Air Commander called a retreat, "TC, Warp, follow him and return to base with the energon!"
People could make fun of his voice all they wanted, but it was useful in battle. It was quite a bit easier to hear over the tumult of other sounds. Swiftly changing forms, the others of his trine took to the skies and spun around the ensuing laser fire. Starscream himself bolted for the half destroyed hydroplant and lunged inside. Rapidly pulling his scarlet wings back to fit in, the seeker ripped several smaller turbines and coolant systems out of the machinery. He should have done this earlier.
'Stupid Auto-brats ruin everything! This was all their fault!' He snarled to himself, knowing Megatron would be furious when he learned the irritating frontliners were still alive. Quickly he stuffed the loot in his subspace and transformed.
The Autobots had chased after him and had just reached the gaping hole in the building when the jet burst from the ceiling and hightailed it out of there. With no enemy, the mechs slowly lowered their weapons and checked each other for injuries. The sound of the waves was suddenly much louder in the subsequent silence. Only the distant call of avians joined the crashing water.
"Huh, cowards." Muttered Cliffjumper as the minibot poked around the still moving turbine and picked up some abandoned cubes that held energon.
Warpath fist pumped, "You can say that again. Did you see how fast they flew away? Baboom! They were outta here!"
Inspecting the new dents on his frame, Sunstreaker broke in without looking up, "You lot seemed like you were getting hammered pretty hard before we got here."
"Well, what took you so long?" The red car snarked.
The tawny colored twin gave a slight glare to his brother who shrugged nonchalantly, "I mighta tripped a bit."
"And knocked me over."
"Oh boo hoo Sunshine. You got more scratches from falling into that building than you got from me bumping into you."
"Hey," Smokescreen gained their attention as they trekked back to Skyfire, "Anyone else think it's weird that Starscream ran into the building? Why would he do that?"
The others paused and looked at each other blankly before Warpath shrugged, "Who knows. They're cons. Can't make heads or tails of half the stuff they do anyway."
Deciding to leave it for now, Sideswipe immediately lightened the conversation, "Did you see their faces when they saw us? Man, that was priceless! I'd pay money for a copy of that."
"I can't believe Skywarp believed you were ghosts." Chuckled Smokscreen and the others joined in. Sunstreaker gave an amused snort before suddenly pausing. The golden bot's footsteps slowed to a halt as a brief brush came from the inside. He looked at the red hellion but his brother hadn't seemed to notice. Sideswipe then stopped and looked back at him with confusion coming through the sibling bond. No, this feeling was different. Not from Sideswipe. The flimsy sensation was like the brush of a butterflies wing and almost not there at all, but Sunstreaker could still feel the slightest tinge of pain emanating from it.
Optics narrowed in concentration, he tried to grasp at whatever it was. But as grains of sand through fingers, it fell away and left him with nothing but the fleeting notion that something was missing. With a frown he shook it off and shrugged at his brother.
'I just need more recharge,' the frontliner thought to himself as they returned to the shuttle-former and headed back to base.
Knock knock knock
'Go Away.' She thought.
Knock knock
'I will throw things at you. I'm not in the mood to deal with whatever...' More pounding on the door interrupted her internal rant.
Knock knock "Come one Shay. Answer the door or I'll start singing the poptart song at the top of my lungs." A gleeful feminine voice sounded muffled by the wood that blocked her entrance into the apartment.
Lifting her head from the instruction manual, Shay peered balefully at the door and muttered, " I swear you do that to torture people."
But the irritated female still got up to unlock it. As soon as the two deadbolts clicked to the side, a fiery haired young woman rushed in like a whirlwind. In barely any time at all she'd set a bag of groceries in the kitchen, another bag with unknown contents by the table, hugged Shay at bone-crushing strength and seated herself to peer at what lay on the wood.
"Instructions for a dishwasher? Come on girl, it's not that hard to figure out." A heart-shaped face turned incredulously to the other as Shay locked the door and sighed, once again settling into her chair.
"Nice to see you to Cassidy. And unlike you, I prefer to know what I'm doing instead of just blundering in. I don't want to break it."
Brushing her brown hair back, she took a sip of tea and reached to pull the booklet back as Cassidy made an 'ah ha!' sound, "I forgot. You always washed dishes by hand back home. You used a dishwasher at my house though."
"Once in a blue moon Cass. It's been a while and it's not even the same type." The apartment was small and cheap but the upside was it miraculously came with a dishwasher. So she may as well use what had been given. Suddenly the shorter woman turned wary blue eyes to the pale-skinned female across from her.
"So, what brings you over? I hope no one died."
Cassidy snickered, "Your sense of humor sucks. Seriously though, just wanted to come see how you're doing. And I brought a present," a sandal covered foot nudged the plastic bag at her feet which still held dubious things inside, "Anyways, Darian been here yet?"
The smile turned into a worried look as Shay returned her eyes to the words on thin paper, "He's dropping by next week."
Going home after leaving the Autobot base had been surprisingly...dull. The young woman had taken her dad's truck to a repair place and gotten it fixed, which had taken a huge chunk out of her savings. How all the damage got there was easily explained too, as apparently she was not the only one who had come in because of the 'crazy Ferrari driver' several days before. Role in the incident diminished, she'd had time to kill while the vehicle was being repaired and spent it on the inevitable phone calls.
The first was to the Jade Creek Police to explain that she was not missing. Understandably, they wanted to know why she had just up and left and what she had been doing. Shay had argued and politely bickered for the better part of an hour trying to explain that it was her own business and the woman had indeed left some sort of warning for her family. With gritted teeth, she explained that perhaps her father had not seen the note.
A lie. She would have words with him once she got home.
They were rather insistent on knowing why she had left and that just going off to who knows where for more than a week was highly suspicious.. In the most respectful manner one could use, Shay had made it quiet obvious that it was a personal matter and they had no right to go digging. To which they replied that she seemed to be hiding something and she responded with:
'As I have broken no laws, you have no right to criticize me. Thank you for doing your job. It is appreciated but unnecessary right now. Have a good day.' And ended the call.
More and more lies. There was no doubt she'd broken a law or two on her journey but Miss Carpenter was not going to admit that to the police right now. Another call, this one to her father as the law enforcements would undoubtedly inform him of the new development sooner or later.
Sitting on the stone steps outside the shop, Shay took a deep breath and studied the horizon before punching in the numbers. It went slightly worse than the first call. For a solid five minutes Darian had ranted while she held the phone away from her ear. People walking by had given her odd looks while she stared back blankly. When the man had finally started to calm down she had stated that she was on her way home and they were going to have a talk.
Which sparked another rant and she hung up again.
Not the best course of action but immensely satisfying.
Especially considering her own annoyance at her father's behavior. But several days seemed to sweep by like petals in a windstorm. She stopped briefly in Riverton to leave a cake on the steps of Margaret and Peter's house (it had taken her an hour to find it again) and then headed home. Shay was suddenly back in her old town, driving past familiar aged buildings and fields before pulling into the partially overgrown gravel drive. It crackled underfoot in a sound she would have recognized in her sleep, having heard it as far back as she could recall. Only two steps out of the newly fixed truck and then she'd been swept up in a hug.
Tears had threatened to escape the walls of her eyes. Relief and content wrapped around the woman and held close as she breathed in the smell of pine, sweat and that human scent. Resting against each other, the father and daughter stayed silent until Shay realized that the world wouldn't let her put things off any longer and she pulled back.
Long story short, Darian had been out of his mind with worry that Shay had been in danger and angry that she wouldn't tell him what had happened. The young woman was irritated that he'd lied about the note and frustrated that people kept trying to get her to talk about why she was gone for almost two weeks. Although several of those days didn't count in her mind, as she'd called to say she was coming back.
Tension, stillness, and a difficult silence descended upon the Carpenter household. Shay went back to work as best she could, cleaned, cooked, gardened and did all manner of her normal everyday routine. It had been nice and a bit odd to stay in one spot for more than a day after so much travel. She had tromped through Autumn bright trees to check her treasure box, sat on the creaky porch to watch the sunrise and sunsets over treetops, and cleaned up the vegetable plots for winter. It was so nice to stand in her own yard and just breath in the incense of rosemary, Queen Anne's lace blooms, and dirt.
But at the same time, it was like a worn out toy. Once you grow up you see things with different eyes. The land, the trees and fields, even her room, were the same. Yet they weren't as bright as they used to be.
It felt the same, sounded, smelled, and even the bread she made had the familiar taste. But none of it felt as comforting as it did before. Perhaps one could understand better if they pulled down an old photo album and found a picture of themselves as a child. Everything seen in the picture would be recognizable and familiar, but at the same time far away. Unreachable and in the past.
The coming and going numbness in her chest didn't help. Instead it made the restlessness grow stronger until Shay started to feel claustrophobic, something that had never happened before. Eventually it got to be too much.
By day five of awkward conversation, worried sidelong glances and the air stifled by unsaid things, Shay snapped. It started with her saying that she was thinking about taking Andrew up on his offer and moving to North Carolina where he and Cassidy were. And then it spiraled out of control. Many hurtful words and accusations shredded the ties between them:
'-You don't tell me things! Don't you trust me?! How can I help you-'
'I can't! Not with everything because YOU can't let me do things on my own-'
'-You never listen and think you know everything. You are still young!'
'I left a damn note and what did you do...?!'
Eventually they'd both run out of things to say and just looked at each other with identical crossed arms and tired eyes.
'Can we just...not argue please? I really...I really miss being able to rely on you.'
'You can always rely on-'
'No I can't. You always take over and try to do it yourself or whatever you think is best. Sometimes I have to do things by myself. Like now. And like before. That's why I didn't tell you I was leaving.'
Silence
'I can't stay here forever and I really want to take this chance. Please dad?'
That night had ended with the two discussing topics that had been previously avoided. Neither would take back their decisions about what they thought was right, and Darian wouldn't fully admit to being in the wrong except for lying about the note. But they actually tried to listen to each others opinions instead of doing there own thing and he accepted that his daughter needed to be on her own in the world. It wasn't perfect, not by a long shot, but it was much better than it had been before.
Which meant several weeks later Shay was in her own apartment on the east side of the country and trying to hold a job at a fitness center as an assistant and taking self-defense classes almost for free because she worked there. Life had settled itself and a routine had been established. Everything was good.
Except for the pesky chill in her center that seemed to be getting worse.
The apartment was spotless and almost impersonal even though the young woman had fully moved in. A very small place, it had a living room separated from a tiny kitchen only by a half wall that cut between the two. On this wall sat a few herb plants in clay pots that made the room smell like sage and oregano. A door on the left led to the bedroom that connected to the bathroom. Her treasure box was placed on the bottom shelf of the book case with stacks of CDs, books, and an old stereo. Sunlight peeked through the two awning windows by the living room and kitchen. The bright rays lit up the pale blue walls and cream colored couch, while dancing on the glossed oak wood chairs and second-hand table. Only the plants, books and dented toolbox showed that someone actually lived there. A fact that had not escaped the red-head.
Cassidy had been quite adamant that Shay at least decorate the walls a little and still hadn't given up, judging by the way she held out the 'present', "Here you are!"
Giving an amused look and raised eyebrow to the megawatt smile from her friend, Shay opened the plastic bags. Reaching a hand in and pulling out the objects revealed two framed pictures about half a foot long each. With mock seriousness and an excited grin, Cassidy bounced slightly in her seat.
"Well? What do you think?"
An entertained huff came from Shay as she studied the images. One was a simple print of a watercolor rainforest. The other was a group shot of all of them (including her father) from several years back.
"You got a print of this and framed it?"
Her hand tilted to flash the group shot at her friend. Cassidy grinned, shining white teeth and bobbing her auburn hair. Shaking her head and smiling in return, Shay let the other woman help her hang them up. They easily chatted as they worked, making sure the frames were straight before snacking on some fruit. Just as they were about finished and the conversation about Andrew's recent dunking in the lake started to slow, Cassidy frowned and studied the shorter woman. Worry became visible in her green-brown eyes.
Shay tipped her head, "What?"
"Are you alright? You look tired. I mean, I noticed when I first walked in but I don't remember the last time you looked this exhausted."
Shaking sepia toned hair, the woman pleaded healthy, "Just having trouble sleeping. Stress." A hand waved away the inquiry as if it weren't important at all. Cassidy nodded, thinking it was all the stress of moving. Shay knew it was from something else.
At random times the numbness inside would retreat enough that pain would make it hard to breath. That morning especially had been bad and the woman had ended up lying on the couch and listening to music. She'd hoped a distraction would have helped but wasn't sure if she succeeded or not. Either way between her chest, the aching behind her eyes, and less of an appetite, she'd been getting little sleep. But Shay wasn't going to tell anyone about it and worry them unnecessarily. She knew exactly when it had started and it didn't take a genius to figure out what probably had caused it. Time and distance. It would get better, she was sure of it.
Eventually Cassidy left to go to work and Shay finished the regular odds and ends that needed to be done. As evening approached on silent wings, she climbed out her window to sit on the fire escape. The glow of city lights to the south-east blocked the stars as early evening fell and the horizon lit up in a flaming glow to the west. Quietly, she lay her head on the cold iron and wondered why. Everything was good now and she still wasn't happy.
Selfish.
Scowling at the internal voice, a sigh blew out to mix with the scents of smoke and concrete, copper slated roofs and brick. Why couldn't this be right? Why couldn't she accept things as they were? Faded eyes glittered suspiciously as Shay watched the day city settle for the night and the nocturnal population start to wake. Absently her hand rubbed the twinging in her chest.
She would make this work.
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'Let me take you when I go, when I go
I don't wanna do this on my own, on my own
I'm breaking free, but of these chains
Let this one remain
Let me take you when I go '
'-And if I let go of these chains now will I float away
Can I just hold on '
Red – Of These Chains
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Did anyone notice in the G1 episodes that Astrotrain refers to himself in third person?