EXT: OUTSIDE THE VAN - Miranda and Stevie are trying to sneak off.
GARY: Where do you two think you're going?
MIRANDA: We want to explore a little!
GARY: You're meant to be helping me!
MIRANDA: You have Andrew is he not enough?
Andrew appears from behind the van.
ANDREW: Yeah am I not good enough for you now Gary?
GARY: Whatever I say you are going to twist it, so just go!
Miranda blows him a kiss.
STEVIE: I wonder if we will bump into anyone famous!?
MIRANDA: Raymond Blanc!?
STEVIE: Wouldn't that be weird? I wonder if he remembers us?
MIRANDA: No, Raymond Blanc!
Miranda turns Stevie around, there stands Raymond Blanc. He turns, spots them and walks the opposite direction.
MIRANDA: I think he remembers us!
STEVIE: Well that was awkward! Let's go in here!
Stevie pulls Miranda into a tent, it is full of small stalls, as soon as they walk in the smell of chocolate hits them.
MIRANDA: We need to find where that smell is coming from!
STEVIE: Maybe the stall that says "Chocolate Heaven"
MIRANDA: Good thinking my petite pal!
They run up to the stall, its like a small chocolate factory.
STALL HOLDER: Oh look, its Willy Wonka and his little oompa loompa!
Miranda and Stevie look to each other, Miranda looks to camera.
MIRANDA: Rude!
She takes a tray of samples off the stall.
STALL HOLDER: It was a joke ladies, just chill!
MIRANDA: We shall not chill. Good day to you sir!
They walk off with the chocolates, Miranda turns back.
MIRANDA: I am still angry but please, what is in this and how much would a box cost?
Stevie comes and drags her away. Next they come to a cupcake stall.
STALL HOLDER: Would you like to try one?
MIRANDA: Would I?
Miranda takes a cupcake of the table and bites into it.
STALL HOLDER: What you have there is my chilli and chocolate cupcake!
Miranda spits it out.
MIRANDA: Chilli and Chocolate?
STALL HOLDER: Not a fan?
MIRANDA: My mouth feels like a volcano!
STILL HOLDER: Maybe a Milk Dud Cupcake will help?
Miranda bites into one.
MIRANDA: What's in this one?
STALL HOLDER: Its made with sheep's milk.
Miranda spits it out again.
STALL HOLDER: No?
MIRANDA: No!
STEVIE: Can I try an "All Nighter" please?
The stall holder hands it to Stevie.
MIRANDA: What's in that one?
Stevie eats the cupcake whole.
STALL HOLDER: Maybe you shouldn't have ate it whole!?
MIRANDA: Why ever not?
Stevie starts to lose her balance.
STEVIE: I've gone all giddy!
STALL HOLDER: That'll be the vodka!
MIRANDA: Vodka?
STALL HOLDER: Yes, its flavoured by vodka and red bull.
MIRANDA: Do you not have any normal cakes?
The stall holder points up. The sign reads "Wacky Cakes"
STEVIE: We should get some for the boys!
MIRANDA: The chilli and chocolate ones will give Gary's savoury muffins a run for their money!
STEVIE: Can we grab two chilli and chocolate ones please?
The stall holders packs two chilli and chocolate ones and adds two "All Nighters" as well. She hands them the box.
STALL HOLDER: BOGOF!
MIRANDA: Excuse me?
STALL HOLDER: Sorry, it means Buy one get one free!
MIRANDA: Why didn't you say so?
STALL HOLDER: £3.50 Please?
Miranda looks to Stevie.
MIRANDA: I'm like the queen, I don't carry any money!
Stevie gets out her purse and pays.
STEVIE: Do you seriously not carry money?
MIRANDA: I don't. I have my card for emergencies and Gary pays all the bills, I always forget!
They walk on and stumble across a stall selling Indian Cuisine, they are greeted by a little old lady. She holds a tray of Samosa's.
LITTLE OLD LADY: Please. Try.
MIRANDA: I never refuse food!
Miranda picks up a piece and eats it.
MIRANDA: Yummy!
Suddenly she pulls a funny face.
LITTLE OLD LADY: You like?
MIRANDA: M... M...
STEVIE: What's wrong?
Miranda started to signal for a drink.
STEVIE: You want a drink?
Miranda nods and imitates milking a cow.
LITTLE OLD LADY: Milk?
MIRANDA: M...
Miranda fans her mouth. Stevie nicks a carton of milk from the stall opposite.
STEVIE: Here!
Miranda downs the milk.
MIRANDA: That my dear is spicy!
The little old lady points to the sign. It reads "Spice is Nice!"
MIRANDA: We must read the signs before trying the food!
The little old lady holds up a board. Its a pain scale.
LITTLE OLD LADY: Pain?
MIRANDA: 10! MAGMA!
The little old lady laughs.
MIRANDA: Its not funny!
LITTLE OLD LADY: Yes! Funny!
Miranda tries to walk off. The little old lady grabs her.
LITTLE OLD LADY: No go! Stay!
Miranda breaks from her grasp.
MIRANDA: Run Stevie Run!
After a few minutes they stop running and stumble across a stall that is selling Organic Fruit and Veg. To the left there is a slightly smaller stall home to a little girl. The sign reads "Fruit-Gals and Vegta-Men.
MIRANDA: And what do we have here?
LITTLE GIRL: Hi there! I am Maisy!
MIRANDA: Hi Maisy! I like these!
MAISY: Why thank you!
Miranda picks up a pumpkin.
LITTLE GIRL: That is Professor Plumpkin!
Miranda turns the pumpkin around to reveal it is wearing glasses and the little girl has drawn on a suit.
MIRANDA: Maisy, he is amazing! I used to make things like this, but I called them Fruit Friends and Vegetapals!
MAISY: I thought I was the only one who made them!
MIRANDA: I thought I was the only that made them! This makes me very happy!
Miranda high fives Maisy and kneels at the stall.
STEVIE: If you're happy here, I will carry on looking around the stalls!
Miranda just nods as she and Maisy start to decorate a butternut squash. Stevie walks off.
EXT: OUTSIDE GARY'S VAN - Andrew and Stevie are led on a foldable sofa, Gary is sat on a deck chair. Miranda walks up with a bag.
GARY: So what'cha get?
MIRANDA: Oh many things, but the piece de résistance are these!
She puts the bag down and pulls out the cupcakes. Stevie's eyes light up.
STEVIE: Oh yes, we found these and wanted you to try them! We wanted to see what you thought!
Miranda hands them out to Gary and Andrew.
MIRANDA: After three you need to put the whole cupcake in your mouth and eat!
MIRANDA/STEVIE: 1, 2 ... 3!
Gary and Andrew shove the cupcakes in their mouths and start to chew.
MIRANDA: Nice?
Gary and Andrew's faces start to turn bright red, they start to sweat. Stevie holds up two cartons of milk.
STEVIE: Milk?
They grab them from her and down the milk.
Scene ends.