A/N: Unbetaed, all mistakes are mine.

Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.

Chapter Eight: On the Line

"I woke up on top of her," I tell my brother. It's muggy sitting out in the car. My tshirt sticks to my chest and I can feel the sweat beading on my forehead. If I'm honest with myself, I can also taste Halley's tears on my lips and still feel the soft curves of her body under mine as I sit in the parking lot.

"That's my boy," Dean laughs on the other end of the line and my brows furrow, my head falling back against the seat. "I told you. Like riding a bi..."

"Are you even listening to me? I attacked her. In my sleep." But it's worse than that. So much worse.

I've been struggling to cope with the pain of realizing what I'd done while my soul was trapped in the pit. Reconciling the man I was with the monster I became is almost unbearable. Being with Halley magnifies everything.

If I had known her before maybe things would've been different. Who am I kidding? I probably would've gotten her killed.

Knowing her now - piercing the veil between my past and present - is tearing everything to shreds. I'm having dreams like I did when I first started having visions. Only this time I see Halley in a tug of war, caught between two versions of myself - the soulless bastard and the beaten plaything. Halley is tethered to the rack and all at once I'm cutting into her and cowering helpless as she screams.

"Look, Sammy, I think we're closing in," Dean cuts through the silence. "And I can't believe I'm saying this, but you need to go back to that room and have a chick flick moment. Because that girl?" I don't answer when he pauses. "She may be the best damn thing that's happened to you and she cares."

A tear slips from my eye and my voice reminds me of the times I peppered Dean with questions or sought his support when we were kids. "That's what I'm afraid of," I confess, voicing what I've been thinking to my big brother. "What if something happens to her because of me?"

Dean sighs and I can almost see him swiping a hand over his face. "And what if that's not your call?" I hold my breath. Halley had said almost the same thing. "What if she's what you need? Don't be an asshat."

A shadow moves near the door. It could be nothing, but it draws my attention. Dean keeps rambling. "Sam? Sammy? Talk to me. What's going on?"

I see a flash of red and hear Halley scream. "I'm gonna have to call you back..."

The Blackberry slips from my hand and I hear Dean's voice as I exit the car, reaching for a weapon to come up empty handed. I was so focused on getting away from her that I hadn't armed myself. Pushing through the door, I see something worse than my nightmare.

Halley is backed against the wall with her hand at her throat. White light seeps from her mouth toward the demon and she flails trying to get away.

"No! Stop!" Words mean nothing, they change nothing. I stupidly thought she'd be safer without me in the room and now this. Gripped by fear, I stand frozen and trying to come up with a move when Halley surprises me.

A flash of red and a growl of pain are accompanied by a harsh chill as a cloud of dark smoke fills the air. I rush forward in time to catch Halley in my arms as the knife clatters from her hand to the dresser behind her. She's more fierce than I gave her credit for, but I never should've put her in this position. I shouldn't have left her alone.

"Are you okay?" Holding her tight to my chest, I brush my lips over her forehead. The air around us smells of death and decay. She whimpers and clings to my shirt, not answering. "Halley?"

When she still doesn't answer, I tip her face up and look down into her eyes. My thumb strokes her cheek and I fight the urge to kiss her and keep kissing her until everything fades away. I haven't felt this way...

Since Jessica. Jess was my escape hatch, my hope for a future that didn't involve this. Halley reminds me so much of her and what I could've had. But she's more, she makes me feel more.

"Hey," I say in a whisper. "I'm proud of you." It's true. I am. She shouldn't have known what to do, but she managed to pull the weapon she'd seen me use and dispatch the demon herself while she was struggling to breathe. "You shouldn't have had to do that. I should've been here. With you."

"Sam, don't," she says quietly, raising a hand to her mouth.

My stomach churns with guilt and I look around the room. No real damage, but the door is open and I'm almost positive I didn't close the door to the car. It's possible the keys are even in the ignition. I rub her upper arms. "Run yourself a bath. I need a minute."

"I mean it, Sam," she tells me. Though visibly shaken, her voice is strong and her grip on my shirt holds me in place every bit as much as the glow in her eyes. "Don't blame yourself."

I nod mutely because it's too late, I already feel responsible. Kissing her forehead, I flex a hand on the back of her neck and walk away. I need to get the guilt out of my system and clean up loose ends, and everything in me says she needs me more.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Supernatural ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

5 Minutes later...

The car is locked up. The salt line at the door is restored. Leaving that brushed away had been my stupidest move in all of this. A rookie mistake that could've cost Halley her life.

I find the bathroom door cracked but I don't hear water running or splashing. Tapping on the door, I stay at the opening but don't enter. "I'm back. We should be clear for a couple of days." I blow out a breath and lean against the frame. "This thing seems to need a few days to regenerate. You..."

It's soft, so quiet I almost miss it. She's crying. "I'm coming in."

She doesn't say no or ask me not to. I find her sitting on the edge of the tub, her hands twisting in the soft cotton of her nightgown. Eyes red rimmed, tears stream over her cheeks and she sobs weakly.

Falling to my knees in front of her, I stroke my fingers up her bare arms. "You're safe," I promise. I don't know how I missed it earlier - the way she grounded me and woke me from the dream with soft touches. I've tried to ignore the way she makes me feel, but Dean is right. She's good for me.

I bring her hand to my chest and press it over my heart. "I'm here. I'm with you." I don't promise I won't leave because I don't know what's going to happen when this is all over.

We aren't that different. We've both suffered loss. She gets me in a way I wasn't sure anyone ever could. "Halley."

Her eyes shine, a hiccup coming as the crying slows. She's so beautiful, even now. "You need to relax." Tugging her to her feet, I rub her back and hold her close. My body tingles as I cup her face and whisper against her mouth. "Let me take care of you."

Our noses brush and we share a breath. She's still in shock, I can feel her trembling as she nods slightly. I reach behind the curtain to start the shower without letting her go. Her muscles are tense and she'll feel sore if she doesn't unwind.

As I kiss her gently my lips barely touching hers, my hands fist in the cotton and I inch it up slowly. This isn't about sex. I have no intention of taking Halley to bed. Not because I don't want to but because it's not what she needs.

She lets me pull the nightgown from her body, lifting her arms and winding them around my neck as the material finds the floor. I suck in a breath when she presses against me and reclaims my mouth. Her kiss is searching, seeking relief and proof of life. How many times have I wanted this? This intimacy of comfort from another person? How badly do I crave it now?

Hooking my fingers in her panties, I push them from her hips. "Take a shower," I instruct, plucking at her lips without looking at her body.

The whimper I get in response - the way her hands tug at my shirt - makes my stomach flip and my body ache. "Stay."

"Halley..." She doesn't know what she's asking. I want to. More than anything, I want to. I also know I shouldn't.

My shirt hits the floor and her bare breasts press to my chest. "Please, Sam?"

I groan against her mouth, my hands sinking into the spun-silk of her golden hair as her hands work the fastenings of my jeans. My heart thunders as we step under the spray. Hot water and steam surround us. Our mouths don't part as our arms hold each other, hands massaging shoulders and rubbing each other's backs.

Comfort. Peace. Being with someone because their presence tethers you to the earth and makes you feel grounded, safe. As much as I had set out to save Halley, she's giving me something I thought wasn't possible.

Salvation.

A/N: So, this was unexpected. Sam took over. I hope you feel the way I do about it...