Chapter 12

Gigi hardly talked at dinner with Chris when he made it back. He'd asked if she wanted to exchange gifts first, but she declined. If she could wait a week when she was four, she could wait a couple hours now that she was 24.

"I talked to Michelle this morning," Chris said. "She had to come home early, Ethan got sick. Poor guy."

"Mm," Giig muttered.

"It's tough, taking care of a sick kid alone. I at least had a nanny to help."

Gigi didn't respond, not processing information today.

Chris didn't say anything for a moment either. Then, "Should I see if she needs anything?"

She looked up at him. "What?"

"Should I give Michelle a hand? Her mom won't be back until the end of the week, on the train."

Gigi shrugged. "Go for it. She doesn't have anyone else."

He nodded, convinced this was the right course of action. "I can pick up her mom too." They ate for a few minutes before he noticed she was picking at her food. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing." She rolled some peas around on her plate. She looked back up at him. "Did you have lunch with Xavier?"

Chris nodded. "Yeah."

"Why would you do that?" she asked, pained.

"Because I was in Seattle, and I thought—hey, his parents see you all the time. I wanted to get to know him. He's actually a good guy."

"I know."

"And he works at Google, that's the holy grail. He told about what he does there, it's pretty cool."

She was quiet for a while again before she said, "He came to his parents' for Christmas. He wasn't supposed to be there."

"Well that's good, you got to see him."

She shook her head.

"No?"

She put her fork down and rested her cheek against her fist. She sighed. "I've made a point not to see him, because . . ." She shook her head again. "So he can move on."

Chris tilted his head. "Why?"

"It wouldn't work, and I don't want him waiting around for me, thinking there'll be a happy ending when the time is right." Desperately, she said, "I don't want him to be like you."

"Like me?"

"Yes," she said. "I know you've been dating Michelle and things have been going well, but it took you so long to get past Lorelai."

He sighed. "We already talked about this."

"I know. But for over 20 years you thought you'd eventually end up together."

"That's a lot different from you," Chris argued. "We had a kid way too young, for one thing, and there were other complications over the years that made our situation unique."

She was quiet for a moment, deciding whether or not to confront him. "Complications like me?"

He was silent for several seconds as he looked at her. "Wh—"

"I know about Sookie's wedding."

His brow creased. He slowly asked, "How do you know about that?"

"Someone in Stars Hollow mentioned it once, about how you were there . . . and intimate, with Lorelai. Rory wouldn't talk about it." She swallowed hard. "Or at least, she didn't want to talk to me about it." Gigi looked her father in the eye. "Why was that?"

Chris sat back and exhaled heavily. "Okay," he said, resolved to tell her. "Your mom and I were taking some time apart, to decide what we wanted, and I . . . spent some time in Stars Hollow. With Lorelai and Rory." He paused. "For about five minutes, we thought the stars were finally aligned in our favor, but then . . . I got a call, and I left them. I let them down for the hundredth time."

Gigi was blinking to keep the tears in her eyes. "What call?"

"Your mom. She just found out she was pregnant." He got up to sit next to her and put his hand on her shoulder. "But none of that is your fault, okay? That was my choice. I wanted to do the right thing, and be there for you. I wanted to be your dad. And I don't regret it."

She was still blinking back tears and she looked at him. She sniffled. "You don't?" she asked in a small voice.

"No." He hugged her for a minute, then he held her by the shoulders. "You're an amazing ki—young woman, and I'm lucky to be your dad."

She sniffled and swallowed hard. "You can call me kid, if you want."

He smiled a little. "You're a good kid." He added, "And I want you to be happy—with whoever will make you happy. Or is it whomever?" He shook his head and pulled her up. "Come on, I want to open presents. I like the sizes of the ones your grandma sent."

XXX

Gigi stood outside Jason Stiles's office, too afraid to go in. She couldn't go in there. Maybe in another two weeks, when it would seem less terrible. She felt like the worst person in the world. Every time she replayed Christmas morning in her head, it made her cry. If she went in there, she was going to think about what happened, and cry, right in front of Xavier's dad.

"Did you need something Gigi?" Jason asked, walking up behind her.

She jumped, startled, as she turned. "Oh, I just—I needed to give you this." She handed him a file folder.

"Thanks."

She stayed planted to the spot, unable to move. "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas for everyone."

"Oh, you didn't ruin it for everyone."

"Right, just Xavier." She swallowed hard. Guiltily, she said, "I'm sorry I never said anything, but we only saw each other a few times a year. It wasn't like we—,"

Jason held up a hand to stop her. "It's okay. It happens, I know."

Lorelai.

Gigi's shoulders slumped.

He added, "You don't have to tell me about your personal life."

"Even when it involves your kid?"

"He's not a kid, and he isn't going to tell me everything either." They were quiet for a moment, then he said, "Xavier's flying back to Seattle today."

"Oh." She nodded. "Good." She stood there awkwardly for a few seconds, not sure what else to say. She was about to leave, when she turned back. "I heard you don't want Sloan working here after college."

He nodded. "I don't want her to feel obligated to stay, and start resenting me. Or feel trapped."

"Maybe she just wants to work with you before you retire," Gigi said. "Couldn't she quit if she starts to hate it?"

Jason tilted his head in consideration. "She could quit, if she wanted." He added, "It's not like I would ever sue her."

"Why would you sue her?"

"Vengeance and pride."

Her brows creased. "Uh, okay." She excused herself and went to her office, where she got back to work. Just before lunch, there was a knock at her door as she was typing an email. "Come in," she said without looking up immediately. She was startled when she saw her visitor.

Sloan Stiles was in the seat across from her, looking more hostile and put-out than she ever had before. "Xavier is leaving."

"I know."

"Then why are you just sitting here?" she demanded. "I've been trying to talk him into moving back for five years and I can't get the job done. Now he finally says he'll move so he can be with you and you tell him not to? Why?"

"He wasn't thinking," Gigi said. "He can't just impulsively decide to move across the country on a whim. That's a big decision."

"This is the side he belongs anyway," Sloan said. "I don't understand. Are you in love with someone else?"

"No."

"Just not Xavier then."

Gigi folded her arms and looked away. She muttered, "I didn't say that."

"Then what is it?" The girl was pleading now, looking desperate.

"I don't want him waiting for me, when I already know it won't work. The only reason it has for this long is because he's 3,000 miles away."

"How long is this long, exactly?" Sloan asked curiously.

"Three years."

Incredulous, she mouthed, three years?

Gigi said, "If Xavier moves back here, we'll go out, and then he will finally find out that I'm a mess in relationships. I'll get jealous and clingy, and he won't be able to stand it. I'll sense it, and dump him before he can dump me. Because getting dumped sucks." She added, "The only reason he doesn't know is because he's been a safe distance away." She shook her head. "I see way too much of your parents for them to hate me when we break up."

"You don't know that you will."

"I do know. It's happened before, and I'm the common denominator."

Sloan's brows were lowering when Jason walked by the office and stepped back. "Sloan? You came in today?"

The girl looked up at her father distractedly. "Yeah, I had something to do."

"Could you come here for a minute? I want to talk to you."

She slowly got up. "Fine." With a stern look back at Gigi, "We're not finished."

Gigi watched her leave and sighed, getting back to work. She was right and Sloan was wrong. The other girl was just too naive to realize it.

Hours later, it was dark outside, and Gigi was still working. Sloan abruptly joined her again, sitting in the same seat she'd been in earlier. "Clingy isn't a problem," she declared, as though she hadn't been gone the whole day. "Xavier loves clingy."

Gigi frowned at her. "No one likes clingy. Trust me, every guy I ever dated in high school and college can testify that clingy is not an attractive quality."

"Well those guys weren't Xavier Stiles. I'm sure you've met is dog," Sloan said. "The marquis de Lafayette is the clingiest, neediest dog ever—and he has separation anxiety. He follows Xavier around, even to the bathroom, and wants to sleep in bed with him."

"Are you comparing me to a dog?"

"Yes."

"Please stop."

"No, listen, he could have gotten any dog—like a great dane. It would just be big lap dog. Ooh, or a little miniature pinscher who thinks he's a big dog. That would be hilarious."

"I get it, you like a dog with identity issues."

Sloan continued, "But he picked the one with the same personality as you."

"Even still, I think one clingy companion is probably draining enough," Gigi argued. "I don't think he needs two."

"You're right, it isn't ideal. So," Sloan said, digging in her handbag. "Here." She slid a wrapped package across the desk.

Gigi stared at it. "A present?"

"Yes. Open it."

She picked it up and tore away the holiday paper. It was a book. She read, "Love Me, Don't Leave Me." She looked back at Sloan.

"Your life is pretty much a Kelly Clarkson song—well, different parent, same issues. Start with that." Sloan dug in her coat pocket. "And if that's not enough, here are some people who you can talk to." She placed a stack of business cards on the desk. "Then you can move from Because of You onto Piece by Piece."

Gigi frowned down at the stack. "You were gone for hours. Did you go to every therapist office in Hartford?"

"No, just a dozen or so." She flipped through the cards and checked the backs of a few. "I noted the ones that accept your insurance. Check them out and pick one. I'll drive you to appointments if you need me to."

Gigi's eyes roved over the cards Sloan had splayed like a deck of cards in front of her. "That might be one of the most thoughtful things anyone's ever done for me." She lifted her eyes to Sloan "Why would you do all that? You don't even like me."

"That's not true, I don't really know you. I never gave you a chance," Sloan said. "And, you got my dad to change his mind. He says I can come work here when I graduate. It was because of something you said."

"Oh. It just seemed like common sense."

"Well he wasn't using any before you talked to him. So I felt like doing something nice." She slowly said, "I was also thinking that I could be your sister."

Gigi frowned. "What?"

"I heard yours is old and never around. Do you foresee the two of you becoming really close any time soon?"

She shook her head. "You can't force a deeper connection with someone who's content with the way things are."

"Okay, so maybe I could fill the sister shaped hole in your heart."

Gigi blinked. "You want to be my sister?"

"Yes. And that means, no matter what happens, I'll be here. As the younger sister, it is my right to annoy you—sometimes on accident, sometimes on purpose." Sloan added, "I'll basically be a friend that you can't get rid of. Warn your bestie that I'll be tagging along from now on."

Gigi looked at the other blond girl without saying anything for a long moment.

"What?"

"I'm just trying to think of who my best friend is."

"Who do you hang out with outside of work?"

Slowly, she said, "My dad." She cringed heavily and her shoulders dropped. "Ugh, when did that happen? He isn't supposed to be my friend."

"So there's an opening?" Sloan asked eagerly.

Gigi defensively said, "I'm friendly with all the ladies in the Junior League. And I talk to Penny down the hall."

"Penny is 64."

"So?"

"She has grandkids."

"Yeah, she's told me about them."

"I don't know if you've noticed, but a lot of the people working here are old. We're probably one common interest away from being work best friends anyway."

"You really think we can be friends?"

Sloan nodded earnestly. She added, "And I'll have your back. Like if any jerk breaks your heart, I'll break his face."

Skeptically, Gigi said, "You would not break your brother's face on my behalf."

Sloan perked up, "You would have to go out with him for that to happen. Are you going to? Can he move back?"

Gigi bit her lip and nodded.

Sloan sprang up from her seat. "Let's go, before he gets away." She grabbed Gigi's wrist, barely allowing her time to snatch her coat. In her car, Sloan pulled out of the parking lot and sped down the highway. "Now, just so you know, you will have to abide by the one executive per family rule. I'm still going to be your boss one day."

"We'll see."

"I'm going to be your boss one day," Sloan said again, firmer.

"We will see."

It didn't take long before they pulled into the Stiles's driveway, Gigi's insides were a bundle of nerves as Sloan led the way into the house. "What if he's mad?" Gigi asked anxiously.

"Oh he is. He's barely said anything since you left."

They went through the kitchen and met Jason before they got to the stairs. Sloan asked, "Where's Xavier? We're here to stop him."

"He isn't here."

"What do you mean? Where is he?"

"He's gone," Jason said. "He came by the office, but you weren't there. He got an earlier flight. He said to tell you goodbye."

Gigi's heart sank. He'd never gone to the office without seeing her.

"He just left?" Sloan asked, her shoulders dropped. "That jerk." She turned around, heading back from where they came. "Come on."

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"We have to go to Seattle so Gigi can tell Xavier she's going to therapy so he can move back and they can be together," Sloan said very quickly.

"Oh," Jason said. He pulled out his wallet and handed her his credit card. "Here."

XXX

They got a late flight, and most of the other passengers settled in to sleep for the duration. But Gigi was way to anxious. She and Sloan still accepted blankets and pillows when the flight attendant got to them.

"When we get back, we'll go out for mani-pedis and have a movie marathon," Sloan said, arranging her bedding.

"What kind of movie marathon?" Gigi asked warily.

"The Hunger Games."

"To watch or to mock?"

Scandalized, Sloan asked, "Who would mock The Hunger Games?" She shook her head. "No, we'll watch one movie a night, with time after for discussion and analysis."

Gigi grinned a little. "Okay."

Sloan stuck an earbud in her ear and handed the second one to Gigi. As she scrolled through her music, she asked, "Have you ever listened to 1989 and Made in the AM together on shuffle?" When Gigi shook her head, she said, "It's like Taylor Swift and Harry Styles are singing to each other."

Gigi nodded once. "Huh. You know, if you married Harry Styles you wouldn't have to change your name."

"I know," Sloan said. "I always liked Louis better though."

"Yeah, he's really cute."

XXX

It was two in the morning, somewhere. If there was anyone else awake on the plane, they weren't talking. Sloan and Gigi were lounging on their pillows and covered with blankets. "I got him two sweaters and a coat, and a Seattle Seahawks jersey."

Gigi nodded. "Lafayette will like all of that." She picked up her phone to find a picture Xavier had texted of his dog, dapper in a bow tie. "Did he send you this?"

Sloan focused on the picture. "I got one where he's wearing glasses."

"Sophisticated."

"Mm," Sloan agreed with a nod. "He's the easiest to think of presents for. I didn't get anything for anyone else." She thought for a moment. "I think I'll make a really terrific aunt some day."

XXX

Gigi shifted around in her seat, trying to ease the pain in her lower back. "Why does he know so much about the subway?"

Sloan rolled her eyes and shook her head. "No one knows. He just got really interested in it when he was in high school. There was this one time our parents left us in the middle of New York. He wanted ride the subway all day, and he just had to drag me along. We only went above ground to walk to different stations, and for lunch." She added, "The only thing in Manhattan he wanted to see was the cemetery at Trinity Church."

"Of course." Gigi adjusted the blanket around herself.

Sloan nodded. "The Wall Street subway station at rush hour had the fastest commuters in New York." She said, "We never went to military school, so I like to think that was our wilderness training."

"Urban wilderness?" Gigi asked. "Did you have to perform on a street corner to collect change for lunch?"

"No. Dad gave us money. For some reason he wouldn't let me hold onto it."

XXX

Gigi yawned widely. She rolled her head to face the other girl. "You know, I've learned to speak three languages, and I still don't know what your Google is set to."

"Klingon," Sloan said. "I'm the most fluent one in the family."

"Nerds."

"Do you want to learn?"

After several seconds, "I'm good."

XXX

With the time difference, it was still dark when they landed in Seattle. They took a cab to Xavier's building, where they stood in front of the locked door, staring through the window. Sloan looked at the long list of tenants. She found her brother's name and proceeded to jab the button repeatedly.

It was a full minute later before Xavier's tired voice came over the speaker. "Stop."

"Let me up," Sloan said.

"Who is me?"

"Sloan."

There was a pause. "Sloan . . . Stiles?"

"Yes, Sloan Stiles, your sister. How many Sloans do you know?"

"Only one. It's the middle of the night, what are you doing here?"

She glanced at Gigi. "I need to see you. I—brought you something. Just, let me up."

He came back on the speaker, exhaling impatiently. "Fine."

The door clicked and they went in, taking the elevator up to his floor. When they got to his door, Sloan stood in front of it, Gigi out of view of the peep hole. Sloan asked, "Do you know what you're going to say?"

Gigi shook her head.

"Okay. Wing it." Sloan knocked. When the door swung open, she bent down to pick up the marquis de Lafayette, who was at Xavier's side. Then she grabbed Gigi's arm and forced her through the door into her confused brother. "Here, this is for you. She's damaged goods, but she's going to work on it."

Gigi's jaw dropped and she glared at the other girl. "Uh!"

"It's okay, we're best friends now, I can be honest."

Xavier held onto her arms to steady her, while frowning between the two girls.

"I'm just going to . . ." Sloan trailed off, waving her hand half-heartedly as she turned to walk away with his dog.

"What?" he breathed, now that things had calmed down. "Best friends?"

Gigi nodded. "It was a long flight."

He shook his head, not caring at the moment that it didn't make sense. "Whatever."

She pointed to the living room. "Can we sit?"

His brow was still creased, not entirely happy to see her for the first time in their acquaintance. "Fine."

They went over to sit on the couch. She looked at him next to her, and she quickly stood. "Actually, I've been sitting for basically six hours. You sit, I'll stand." She put her hands on her hips while he waited. She looked down at her feet and back at him. "I didn't really plan a speech or anything."

"What are you doing here?"

"Short answer? I came to bring you back."

He was slow to respond. "I already had that idea, so I'm going to need the long answer. Have you been avoiding me?"

"Yes."

He turned his palm up. "Did I do something?"

She sat back down. "No, it's not you, it's me." He lifted his eyes to the ceiling. She took his hand to get his attention. "It's because I love you."

Flatly, he said, "You've got a funny way of showing it."

"That's why I came, to explain. I'm not naive, I know love doesn't magically make everything perfect. I'm still me," she said. "I'm just . . . Gigi. People leave, and it hurts. Or they don't care that we hardly see each other." She added, "It isn't so terrible if don't get attached in the first place. Nobody gets hurt then. And by nobody, I mean me."

"Not all people leave," Xavier said. "I was trying to do the opposite of leave."

"I know, but then we could break up," Gigi said. "That's the outcome of my relationships, usually because of me, one way or another. I didn't want you waiting for me—for that."

"That isn't for you to decide."

She blinked. "Oh." She said, "I still don't want you to."

"Well your solution sucks."

"Right." Gigi took a deep breath. "So, I'm going to talk to someone who listens to people's problems."

He didn't say anything at first. Then, "You're going to a therapist?"

In a small voice, she answered, "Yes."

"Good," he said. "You're long overdue."

She frowned at that. "Sloan found me about a dozen."

He looked at her silently for a moment. His hands, which she still held, slid to her wrists, to pull her in closer. "I'll move back and date you, for starters," he said. "I should meet your parents."

"You already met my dad."

"Parents, plural." When her shoulders dropped, Xavier nodded and raised a brow. "If your therapist is any good, yes, both of them. There's a cemetery I want to see in Paris anyway. Two birds."

Gigi mouthed, fine.

His hands continued up her neck to hold her face. His lips crashed to hers hungrily, the first time in months. He stopped to rest his forehead on hers. "Hey."

"What?"

"Stop thinking you're the bad one. You aren't bad."

"Oh." She nodded. "I'll work on that," she promised, resuming their kiss.