I haven't made a disclaimer yet, so CSI doesn't belong to me. You all know who it belongs too. As always, read & review. Thanks for your interest. And if you don't like it, at least tell me! 3 reviews is highly disproportionate to 866 reads. I have a bit of writers block at the moment, and I turned 18 yesterday so I'm a bit hung-over. Forgive me.
Catherine sat down with a coffee, and gestured to the pot. Sara fetched a cup and sat next to Cath at the breakfast bar.
"I can't believe you haven't been for a scan yet. You don't even know for sure how far along you are!" Catherine said
"Cath, I only found out when you did. And yeah, I've been putting it off. I'm frightened of it all becoming real. Right now, all I have is the word of a nurse and a tiny bump that might be a baby bump or a beer belly. And what if I'm like-" Sara stopped. A noise that sounded suspiciously like someone trying not to cry escaped her.
Gently, Cath tried to coax Sara out of her defensiveness. "Like what, Sar?"
But Sara was having none of it. "Nevermind Cath. I can't even remember what I was going to say."
She was looking the other way, and it was obvious to both women that Sara was lying. However, Catherine didn't push it and Sara made no move to inform her of the truth. Thinking it easier to leave the conversation, Sara picked up her too-hot coffee and went into the spare room where she had been sleeping for the last two weeks.
She put the coffee on the nightstand and sat down heavily on the edge of the bed. She'd been trying to keep her emotions all nicely packaged and stored away in some place she didn't frequent. It wasn't working. Over the last few weeks, Sara have become attached to Catherine, and she loved the idea of being in love. In reality however, Sara found it was one of the most terrifying experiences of her whole life.
No wonder I avoided it for so long.
She kept thinking about her mother and father, replying her childhood inside her head, the smell of copper in the air.
She kept thinking that she took after them. That meant that she might either be highly abusive or, and she didn't know which was worse, a murderer. Both ideas repulsed her, and every so often she was so worried about it that she threw up.
After a while Catherine came in. She just stood in the doorframe, afraid to initiate contact and yet worried to the point of nausea. This was a highly volatile and emotional Sara, and Catherine didn't want to poke the bear. On the other hand she cared about Sara and wanted to be her hero.
Sara was oblivious to Catherine, and she appeared to be crying, silently. She didn't seem to know she was crying, which probably made it worse to Catherine.
"Sidle." She said gently, whilst taking a step into the room. Sara didn't look up, but she smiled a little at the corner of her mouth.
"Willows." She replied a few minutes later.
"I know you lied."
"I know you know. I- I'll tell you about it. Just not right now, okay?"
Catherine sat down next to Sara and put her hand tentatively on her shoulder, hesitating above it for a second. Sara snorted.
"You can touch me you know. I won't bite."
Catherine smiled. "That's a real shame." This time Sara laughed outright, turning her head toward her partner and showing off her gap-toothed grin.
Catherine gasped and jumped away as if burnt. She almost screamed in her shock, and she couldn't even speak. Her eyes were wide and her mouth slightly ajar.
"What? What is it Cath, are you okay?" Sara asked.
"I-I'm just shocked." She replied, quietly.
Catherine had seen that adorable Sidle smile and realized.
Catherine loved Sara. No, that wasn't right. She'd loved Sara since the beginning.
Catherine Willows had fallen in love with Sara Sidle.
Well, this was new. She thought she'd been in love with Eddie. With numerous other boyfriends and girlfriends that littered her past. In reality, though, she'd only been in love with the idea of being in love.
And now that she'd found the real deal, well, she was damned if she'd lose it.
"Sara, if ever anything is bothering you, you know that you can talk to me, right?" Sara nodded, perplexed. "No, I mean it. I-I just-"
Catherine trailed off, nerves chewing the edge of her words.
"Don't worry about it. I'll get my stuff and go." Sara was smiling sadly. By the time Catherine had realised what she had said, Sara had thrown most of her stuff into a case.
"No! Sara that's not what I meant." Catherine said, standing.
"Don't bother. I understand."
Catherine stamped her foot on the ground.
"Goddamn it Sidle! I'm in love with you, for fucks' sake!"
Comically, Sara dropped the glass photo frame she'd been holding on the floor. Amidst the broken glass, tiny Sara, Lindsay and Catherine stared up at them, smiling against a backdrop of the science museum.
"You what?" Sara asked.
Catherine just shrugged.
"Oh, Catherine." Sara said, softly. She walked through the broken glass without even realising and threw her arms around Catherine's neck, forcing her to fall onto the bed. "I'm in love with you, too."
Catherine lifted her head off the pillow and kissed Sara passionately, who kissed her back. It was the first time since the lab that they'd kissed. After a while, Sara pulled away.
"My feet hurt" she said.
Both women sat up, and looked at Sara's feet. Covered in blood, shards of glass were stuck to the bottom of her socks.
"Oh, fuck. I'm sorry about your feet. And your picture. What even was that a photo of?" Catherine asked. Sara reached for it, but since Catherine was closer she grabbed it before Sara could.
"Oh, Sar. Why didn't you just say?" Catherine said, almost inaudibly.
"I didn't know you felt the same. I felt like an intruder, just walking into your house and helping your daughter with her homework. Like I was stealing from you or something."
Catherine just shook her head.
"Hey, Cath? Uhm, do you think you could help me with this?" She gestured at her feet, and Catherine jumped up.
"The first aid kit. I'll just get it."
Sara wasn't scared anymore. As long as Catherine was behind her, she didn't have anything to worry about.
After all, it's like riding a bike, right? All kids were the same, surely?
Or… not.