Chapter 2: Tobias – Entering the Fire

I wake up at three-thirty, as I have every morning since Tris went to Erudite headquarters. That's what time it was when I woke up and found her gone, and it's now imprinted on my brain better than any alarm clock.

She's still lying next to me, curled on her side, and for a moment, I just wrap an arm around her and hold her close. It's always amazing to me how much strength I draw from her presence. I could actually fall back asleep now, for once, but it's time to get up. When we returned to the apartment last night, the others were already asleep, and Tris convinced me we should wait until the early morning before relocating.

I place my mouth close to her face and say gently, "It's time to wake up." She groans and swats at me, but I catch her hand and add, "Tris. We need to get up now." She sits up with a sigh, running her fingers through her hair. It's been growing longer again, though it will take years to reach its former length, if she even decides to let it grow.

"Are the others up yet?" she asks groggily.

"No," I answer. "I thought I'd let you have the joy of waking them."

There's very little light in the room, so I can't see her expression, but she shifts to the side of the bed and gets up. At first, it seemed kind that the others left us the room with the big bed, and I know I slept better with Tris next to me, but it felt strange sleeping on such an enormous mattress. We spent the night tucked into one corner of it, like we'd lose each other in the vastness if we stretched out more. I suppose it's another Abnegation instinct – it feels selfish to use something bigger than we need.

We make our way out of the dark room, and Tris goes to the room next door to rouse Christina and Cara. I walk to the couch where Uriah is sprawled, half his body trailing to the floor. I'm not really sure why he joined us when we escaped. He didn't have to, since he hadn't been labeled a traitor, and in a way I would have preferred him to stay at Erudite headquarters. That way, we would have had another friend inside, and he would have been safer. I still feel an obligation to Zeke to keep his brother safe. He's never said anything to me about it, but it's the kind of thing friends do for each other.

"Uriah," I say loudly, shaking his shoulder, and he jumps. "That's enough beauty sleep."

He drags all the parts of himself together and shifts to a sitting position, rubbing his eyes. "Maybe that's enough for you," he says, "but some of us are prettier and need more sleep to stay that way." I grin – it's hard not to like Uriah. He and Zeke share the same sense of humor, and after years of being so isolated, I find I really enjoy laughing with them.

"So, why exactly do we have to leave?" Uriah asks as he gets to his feet, stretching in a way that makes the whole room seem full of his limbs.

"Because the factionless will be clearing the building soon, and I don't want them to catch our little group of traitors."

"Clearing the building?" Cara asks as she helps Christina down the hallway from the second bedroom. Christina has a crutch now, but she's clearly not good at maneuvering it yet. Cara is hovering by her, her hand reaching forward and jerking back spasmodically with every step Christina takes. "Why would they do that?"

I sigh. I told Tris the truth last night, but I didn't really want the others to know I was part of the factionless plan. Still, I suppose they're entitled to answers if they're going to follow me into the unknown.

"Because they want to eliminate all the factions," I reply heavily. "So they're planning to gather everyone together in the Erudite compound, group them into new living units, and distribute them across the various faction buildings. I think they'll probably go to Amity first, since most of the Candor are already at Erudite, but they'll come here soon enough to collect anyone who's left."

"You mean, the Divergent population," Tris comments as she emerges from behind Christina. Her expression is alert now, her eyes alive with that look that always draws me to her. I step closer to her automatically but then stop, remembering our focus here.

"Yes, the Divergent who didn't reveal themselves when Jack Kang asked them to. Everyone else is presumably dead or at Erudite now."

There's a long pause after that comment, and then Tris says, "Maybe we should warn them."

"About what?" I ask. "They're not in any danger from the factionless. In fact, they're probably safer now than they've ever been. We're the ones who need to hide."

Christina looks down at her leg and says, "You know, maybe we should take our chances at trial. I mean, we didn't really do anything that wrong…."

"We showed the video," Tris answers for me. "And Evelyn definitely did not like that." For a moment, I just look at Tris. I hadn't quite figured out why I felt so compelled to get them out of there. I assumed it was just because I didn't want Tris back in an Erudite cell, no matter what the circumstances around it might be, but now I realize she's right. My mother is certainly not the forgiving type, and the expression on her face yesterday was disturbing. I haven't seen her that angry in a long time, and I definitely do not want that anger directed at Tris.

"You know what?" I say. "Let's get moving. We can talk more when we're somewhere safer." I look at the pile of supplies and realize it will take at least three trips, particularly since Christina can't carry anything and someone will have to keep their hands free to help her. "Let's start with a light load first and find a location, and then a few of us can come back for the rest."

It takes us close to two hours to find a suitable abandoned building and to get everything moved into it. I'm careful to make sure we're not followed. Years of avoiding the Dauntless cameras has made me good at moving without being noticed, but the others are too careless, and Christina is impossible to hide. I'm glad we're moving in the dead of night.

Once everyone is settled in, I pull Tris to the side. "I'm going to go talk to my mother," I tell her. "I'll wait until it's safe to come back here, so it might be after dark." I don't want her to worry about me and come looking.

"I want to go with you," she says immediately, and I can't help but chuckle.

"That would kind of defeat the point of hiding you from her," I respond.

She considers that for a moment and then says, "But we're supposed to face things together. That's the deal, right?"

I shake my head. "That doesn't apply to this. It's not dangerous for me to talk to my mother, but it would be an unnecessary risk for you to go."

It's too dark to see her face, but I can sense her hesitation. Finally, she says, "I just need to know about Caleb. I need to know if he really helped me or not, and what they're going to do to him."

"I know," I say gently. "I'll find out. I'll talk to Peter or something, and then we'll figure out what to do. Together. Okay?"

"Okay," she says after a moment, and then she finds my face in the darkness and kisses me. It's a light kiss, but I pull her into my arms and kiss her back more firmly. I'm not going into danger, but after the last few weeks, I still feel like every kiss could be our last. I won't squander the opportunity to kiss her like I mean it.

It's not that long a walk to Erudite, not nearly long enough for my comfort. I wish we were miles away, but of course Christina isn't up to the walk.

As I get closer, I begin to see factionless soldiers patrolling the streets. They stare at me openly but let me pass. That's a good sign; it means that my mother hasn't issued any orders regarding me. I know she'll be angry that I disappeared, and that I took the others with me, but at least she's presumably still willing to talk.

I enter Erudite headquarters, my stomach clenching at the familiar sight. I've entered this room twice now – once when I turned myself in to join Tris, walking through here with pain twisting my body and mind, and once as we shot our way through innocent people to wrest control from Jeanine. I'd be happy never to see this place again.

I pause next to one of the factionless guards by the door. She's dressed in an Erudite blue shirt with Amity red pants, and a tattoo climbs up her neck and disappears into her gray hair. She was probably Dauntless before she grew too old to live there. She brings to mind everyone the faction system discarded, and I remember that I don't really disagree with my mother on the need to change things. It's just a question of how to do it.

The guard's eyes widen a little in recognition as she looks at me, and I smile briefly at her. "Where are the Dauntless sleeping?" I ask casually.

Her mouth puckers as she considers her answer, and then she says, "I'll take you there. I'm not good at giving directions."

She leads me through the winding hallways of this building I hate so much, and I try to close my mind to the images that creep in. Tris, pale and weak, almost ghostlike, being led by Peter to whatever new torture Jeanine had designed. Watching her scream and scream under the fear serum until I gave up and revealed the location of the factionless safe houses. Pressing my head to the window for a last glimpse of her before she walked to her death. Seeing her limp body in Peter's arms before he told me she was alive. Almost every horror that haunts me at night resides in this building. It's no wonder I can't let her go back to a cell here.

But I keep my body upright and solid and my face expressionless as I walk beside the factionless guard. A lifetime of hiding my pain makes it almost easy, and this is no place to show weakness.

The guard stops at the end of a hallway and says, "They're mostly in the rooms along here. Are you looking for anyone in particular?"

"A couple of people," I answer. "Do you happen to know which room is Zeke's?" She scrunches her face thoughtfully, and I add, "His girlfriend Shauna uses a wheelchair, so they'll be in an accessible room."

"Oh, right," she says as her face brightens. "I know who they are. They're probably over here." Leading me down the hallway, she pauses next to a closed door. "I'm pretty sure this is it. It's kind of early to interrupt them, though. Are you sure you don't want to wait a while?"

"That's okay," I say. "He's an early riser." He's definitely not, but after all the pranks he's pulled on me over the years, I have no objection to rousing him unexpectedly.

"Okay, then. I assume you can find your way back?" I nod, and she leaves me there to return to her duties.

I smile a little as I knock as loudly as possible, in an urgent, rapid pattern. It doesn't take long for Zeke to throw the door open, standing there in nothing but boxer shorts, his hair tousled and his face alarmed. For a second, he blinks against the light in the hallway, and then he recognizes me.

"Four. What's wrong?"

"Nothing. This is just your friendly wake-up call." He glares at first, but then a smile begins to tug at his mouth.

"Fine," he says. "What do you want?"

"We need to chat privately. Throw some pants on and come with me."

"What, are you afraid people will be blinded by my dazzling beauty?" he asks, striking an absurdly provocative pose.

"Yes, I'm afraid I won't be able to control myself."

"Well, out of consideration for you, then…" and he walks back into the room, closing the door behind him.

As I wait, I wander up the hallway, looking into some of the rooms with open doors. They're set up as large dormitories, with beds crammed tightly into each space. My mother must be housing all of Dauntless here while she tries to figure out her next steps. It's still very early, so almost everyone is asleep, but I think I spot Peter sitting on a bed in one of the rooms. Good. I'll be back to talk with him later.

Zeke joins me, and we walk wordlessly down the hallway. We both worked in the Dauntless control room, so we tend to assume we're always under surveillance. We won't talk until we're somewhere safer.

Two hallways down, Zeke leads me into a men's bathroom. I pause in the doorway, raising an eyebrow at his choice of location, but he just shrugs and comments casually, "Well, I did just get up. Besides, it's as private a space as we'll find." I suppose I can't argue with that, so I follow him into the room and close the door behind me.

I don't watch as he does his business. I've never been comfortable with urinals. Abnegation doesn't believe in exposing that much of yourself to anyone else, except for your spouse. Even then, I think wryly, they probably hide in the darkness.

It's difficult to find a place to look. There's the mirror, of course, but I don't really like to look at my reflection. Part of it comes from my childhood, from Abnegation's restrictions on mirrors, but it's also that I don't really like how I look. Tris always acts like I'm handsome, and I love that she sees me that way, but I know my ears stick out too far and my nose is too long and hooked. She's much better looking than I am.

"Okay, I'm done," Zeke says, amused that I always refuse to watch him in here, and he crosses to the sink to wash his hands.

Turning to face him, I begin, "I had to leave yesterday," but he interrupts me.

"Yeah, I know. I can't blame you, though I gotta ask why you took Uri with you. I mean, the kid's a little dim sometimes, but he's family."

"I didn't take him," I quip back. "He followed on his own like a stray dog. You must have been forgetting to feed him again."

"Oh, man, I knew I forgot something…" But then his face grows more serious as he studies me. "Tris may be in real trouble, you know. Your mother was not exactly amused by that video, and I don't get the feeling she likes your girlfriend."

"No, she doesn't." I shift uncomfortably. "How did she handle the situation after I left?"

He sighs, running a wet hand through his hair. "She said the video was a lie that Jeanine put together and she forbade all discussion of it. Seriously, she used that word, just like an Erudite or something."

"And how did people respond?"

"By discussing it, of course." He grins. "Quietly, though. No one wants to start another battle, at least not yet. Besides, if we're going to fight for something right now, it should probably be the factions, shouldn't it? Not some unknown group outside the city."

He quirks an eyebrow at me, and I know he's waiting for me to explain my role in ending the factions. He's shown remarkable loyalty in talking to me at all, I realize slowly, but it won't exactly help for me to confirm his suspicions about what I did.

"Yeah," I say after a moment. "Is anyone planning to do anything about that, or about the video? Because I'd like to help if they are."

"Not that I've heard. Sorry."

I nod, disappointed, though I'm not entirely sure why. I don't really want us to return to the faction system, and I don't want to face another battle, either inside or outside the city. I would love to just move forward to a quieter life with Tris…. But that doesn't seem likely.

"If you're around, I'll let you know if I hear anything," Zeke offers after a moment.

"Yeah, thanks. I don't know if I'll be around or not. I still need to talk to Evelyn, but if I can come by again, I will. And I'll try to keep Uriah out of trouble." I smile a little, and Zeke grins gratefully.

He wipes the remaining water from his hands onto his pants and crosses the room. "While I'm here…" he says cheerily as he approaches the vending machine on the wall, the one that's also in most of the Dauntless men's rooms. It's something else I've never felt comfortable with, but now I notice it with a new curiosity. Zeke twists the knob, grabbing the package as it's dispensed, and then he turns to me. "You want any?" he asks, smiling slyly.

For a long moment, I hesitate. The Abnegation in me says that I shouldn't even be considering this before I'm married, but the rest of me doesn't seem to agree anymore. And after the way Tris kissed me last night…maybe it's a good idea to be prepared, just in case.

"Yeah," I finally say, holding out my hand, palm up. I try to keep my expression placid as I look straight ahead, but I can feel the redness entering my face, and I'm sure Zeke will say something to embarrass me even more.

But to my surprise, he just looks at me levelly and says quietly, "Good for you, man." And he drops the package in my hand before turning to get another one from the machine. I shove it into my pocket without looking at it. And then we leave the room, heading back to the Dauntless dorms, quiet again in the hallways.