.::I do not own The Outsiders::.

13. Christmas

December 24th 1966

Today is one day before Christmas.

I feel awful. I miss everybody else at home. So so much. Lucky for me I won't be alone tonight, my friend I met at the gas station where I work in invited me to his party. Told me there would be a lot of people and chicks. I dont really care about them but as long as I keep my mind off this sadness its okay with me.

St. Louis Illinois aint so bad. Especially with snow. Such a huge city. I wish Ponyboy was here, He would like it a lot. That kid is very different from us, I hope he stays that way.

Right now Im counting up my money I saved this past month and a half. My boss gave me my Christmas bonus. Can't believe I have this much saved. I don't exactly know what to buy though...

Last night I did something. It wasent stupid or anything. I just did it. Why? Guess I was homesick. Sometimes I lay awake at night remembering why the hell Im doing what I am. Sure its working, my wound is closing bit by bit. Hopefully one day it will be all closed up. And that day is the day I will go back home.

I promised myself this. For now going to keep this up. Find new places to live in, learn to work in other things too.

Merry Christmas Mom, Dad. Merry Christmas Darry and Pony. You too Steve, Twobit, Johnny and Dally. Gosh I miss them.

The snow outside was absolutely white covering the Curtis backyard glistening beautifully. Ponyboy was gazing up at the white sky trying to imagine himself up on those white puffy clouds. Suddenly he felt a hard cold snowball collide against his face. Steve barked out a laugh as Twobit wiggled his eyebrows at him proud at such aim.

"And that's how it's done!"

Ponyboy narrowed his eyes menacingly, "Oh you are so going to get it."

In a matter of minutes he already had some snowballs in his gloved hands throwing them at Twobit and Steve. Johnny walked to the backyard hearing all the noise. Dally joined in going to Pony's side aiming at Steve. Ponyboy ducked a big snowball making it smash onto Dally's face. Twobit lowered himself behind his small fort muttering, "Ah shit."

Johnny pursed his lips amused to see what he was going to do. Ponyboy smiled mischievously waiting for Dally to blow a gasket. Steve backed away leaving Twobit alone to defend for himself.

"Keith. Mathews. You are. Dead." Dallas growled angrily.

"Awe c'mon Dal! H-have some Christmas spirit!"

Pony cleared his throat, "Technically Christmas is tomorrow. Today is Christmas Eve."

Twobit glared at the young Greaser, "Gee thanks kid!"

In one fast move Dally had Twobit on the ground. Twobit's head was locked with Dally's arm with much force almost chocking him to death. Steve began laughing at this enjoying every second of it, "That's what you get for being such a bird brain!"

Dally called Ponyboy, "C'mere! Why doncha have some sweet little revenge on this clown!"

Twobit was struggling to get away at hearing this, Dally only held on stronger, Ponyboy rubbed his chin then he smiled evilly, "Don't mind if I do."

He grabbed a shovel that was used to make the forts digging it onto the ground then lifted it up with a ton of snow. Johnny stood closer to them wanting to see. Steve whistled a high tune having a lot of fun. Twobit squirmed under Dally's grip. I'm doomed!

"Tisk tisk Twobit, this is what you get for getting at me distracted." The shovel went upside down letting all the snow fall on to Twobit's head. Dally snickered finally releasing him. Steve and Pony high fived each other proud of his prank. Johnny rolled his eyes smiling at his friend's goofy behavior. Twobit shook his head like there was water in his ears. He looked fiercely at Ponyboy ready to pounce on him.

"Not so fast Twobit!"

They all looked behind them, it was Darry who was by the back door, "Christ almighty, it's freezing out here! Get your behinds inside now. It's time to eat anyway."

The gang cheered quickly making their way into the kitchen. Ponyboy glanced behind him thinking of his middle brother. He woulda loved this. Johnny put a hand on his shoulder squeezing it guessing what he was probably thinking about. Pony smiled at Johnny reassuringly, "I'm okay Johnny Cakes."

Inside was Darry fixing up the food for everybody, they all had pitched in money for the event. Sitting around the table Pony helped his brother give out the plates. He handed each their own portion. Twobit had that special twinkle in his eyes when it came to food. Good thing I brought my fat pants! Ponyboy smiled seeing everyone together enjoying their meal happily. For just a mere second the thought of his brother disappeared. Darry seemed to think the same so he shot him a warm smile.

The radio played Christmas tunes, the air was joyful. The Curtis Christmas tree was in the corner of their house with the ornaments their mother had saved. Some presents were under there already. More snow started to fall from the sky making another layer of fresh white snow that sparkled under the moon's glow. Dally ruffled Pony's hair noticing him spacing off.

"What? The food not good enough for ya?" Dally asked his mouth full.

Pony grimaced, "Ewe, now it's not."

Twobit waved a chicken leg at him, "If you ain't gonna finish that up give it here!"

Darry rolled his eyes, "If ya'll keep talking with your mouths full you're gonna choke so just chew it up and swallow."

Steve sighed satisfied finishing up, "Now that was good food."

Twobit agreed burping loudly, the gang made a face, "Damn right Stevie. Now where's dessert?"

Ponyboy gaped at him in disbelief, "How can you fit so much in you? No wonder you're so fat!"

Dally snickered, "That's 'cause he's a cow."

Darry stood up from his seat, "Actually I did think of dessert." He got out of the stove one delicious looking chocolate cake big enough for everyone. Ponyboy beamed, his brother generally never did those kinds of things. It was usually Sodapop...He groaned inwardly not believing what he was thinking again. God damn it. Now now. Let me enjoy this moment! Twobit rubbed his two hands together imagining the chocolate melting his mouth. Steve wondered if he could eat at least one slice. The hell with it, I'm eating two. Johnny didn't want to admit it but he was excited to have some and Dally was okay with it. Although his stomach rumbled loudly eagerly awaiting a slice.

Darry handed the knife to Ponyboy, "I'll leave you the honor."

Ponyboy grinned, "Don't mind if I do."

The Greasers continued their small party for hours. Games of cards, wrestling, music, smokes. It was all too good. It had to end when the clock struck one in the morning. Ponyboy yawned leaving his cards on the table. Twobit went on home saying he needed to show up with his mother and sister. Dally left to Buck's thanking Darry for the food. Johnny and Steve stayed so Pony supplied them with pillows and blankets.

In his own room Ponyboy gazed outside his window. The moon shone brightly along with the stars. The day went well making him happy. He laid in bed as his eyes closed bit by bit tired.

Merry Christmas Mom. Dad. You too Soda...

"Merry Christmas Pony!"

Somebody had jumped on his bed shaking him to wake up. Ponyboy rubbed his eyes seeing Darry on his bed. Pony grinned at his brother getting of the bed to the living room both emerging from his room. Johnny and Steve had already woken up watching some television. They greeted him with the same words. Merry Christmas. He peeked outside the living room window. Same as yesterday only more snow. The small flakes fell on the ground accumulating more and more snow. He knew he had to shovel the yard later on. He then noticed their mail box was open with something sticking out.

"Hey Darry!" He shouted behind him.

"Yeah?" Darry responded from the kitchen preparing some coffee.

"Did we have to get some mail today? Maybe from the Social Worker or something?"

That caught Darry's attention as well as Steve's and Johnny's who stopped watching television, "No...Why? Did we receive mail?"

Ponyboy put on his shoes walking outside ignoring Darry's stern voice saying to him to put on a jacket. Young Curtis felt chills run down his spine as he took hold of the white envelope inside. Furrowing his eyes he saw that there was no return address only his own. His eyes widened, To Ponyboy and Darry. He recognized the hand writing. His heart began to beat fast against his chest while he ripped open the paper. Inside contained one sheet of paper. Swallowing thickly, Pony began reading it. Darry was on the porch irritated with his little brother not obeying him. Johnny glanced at his friend noticing him too still. Somethin's wrong. Steve frowned, "I think you should go see Dar."

Darry hurried to his brother who was now shaking like a leaf, he mistook it for him being cold. Just as he was about to scold him he stopped. Ponyboy's eyes watered, one tear sliding down his right cheek. His whole body roughly shuddered, Darry was now getting worried not understanding his sudden change of emotions. Ponyboy gulped, "Look." He whispered as cold vapor escaped his mouth.

His older brother saw the paper that was crumpling in Pony's hand, he took it. A cold feeling grew in the pity of his stomach reading every word written on the white sheet. Darry shut his eyes closed, "Soda..."

Dear Pony and Darry and everybody else:

I really hope you are having one good Christmas. I miss you guys so much. Don't worry bout me Im doing ok. Tell that to the guys too, that I miss them. Every day I think bout all of you. Like what you are doing, how are you doing. Your chocolate cake. God I miss that a lot.

From where I am I send you one big hug.

I know this must be so sudden. After all I havent made contact with you in such a long time. I dont know if I'll write more, I dont think so. But I just had to since it was Christmas.

I wish you a very Merry Christmas. I miss you all. Pony, Darry I love you Really dont worry bout me. Im doing just dandy.

Oh and have a happy new years too. Take care of yourselves please. Bye.

~Sodapop P. Curtis

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(Sorry for any grammar mistakes)

(:Thank you for the reviews & keeping up with the fanfic! I appreciate it a whole lot!