Homesick

Frisk sits in Toriel's living room, in her chair as she bandages his many scrapes and bruises. He stares past her, a blank look in his eyes. He tries not to think, tries not to see what he did. Every time he meets the goat woman's eyes, he sees that pained face he left stained on her as she fell away to dust. As long as he avoids her face, he might be able to stand her presence without that feeling coming back. Toriel sighs, standing, clapping her hands together, "There, all better! I am really sorry for leaving you alone like I did. It was unwise of me."

He shakes his head, his eyes drifting to the floor now, "It's.. Okay.."

Toriel looks down at the boy in front of her and she feels terrible. Her many attempts to rouse a smile out of the boy have failed. Why is he so tortured? It must be this place. Maybe it's me? Monsters can seem pretty scary. Isn't that why the humans locked us up in the first place? They became afraid of us. She steps towards him and opens her arms. Frisk stands and shoves her, shaking, "Get away from me!"

Toriel stumbles lightly, looking surprised and hurt, "Ch-child.. I.. I was only.."

"No!" he cries, running to the room she's lending him.

He slams the door, leaning against it. He grips his chest, as if in pain. His breathing becomes labored and he closes his eyes tight. She was trying to hug him, and at the moment, he wanted to drive a knife through her heart. I can't stay here, I'm a danger to her. I'm a danger to them all. This wasn't a good idea. I should have just.. What could I really have done?

"You really want to go back?" she had asked, laughing in his face, "After everything you've done?"

He nodded, "They don't deserve what we did.."

"You mean what you did? I just sat back and watched, remember?" she sneered at him.

Tears ran down his face as he nodded again, "I.. I know.. And that's.. It was wrong of me.. I shouldn't have.. Look, I don't want to destroy anything else!"

She tilted her head, "Is that so, Frisk? Heh, well it's all gone now, there's nothing left to return to."

He grabbed her shoulders, "You can bring it back! I know you can!"

She threw him off her and stood, her eyes turned cold, "You want that pathetic world back? Fine, but the price is steep."

"I'll do anything!" he replied, too quickly.

She leaned down, taking his chin in her grip, "Is that so?"

Her grin widened, "I accept."

She stabbed her free hand into his chest and she ripped out his soul. He cried out, and as he lost consciousness, the last thing he saw was her grin and cold eyes as she held his soul in her grip. Darkness sat in, and then he awoke, the world anew. The instant he woke, he knew something was wrong. He could feel it, or rather, he couldn't. So far, the only emotion welling in him, is excruciating guilt. Frisk wipes his face with shaky hands, "No.. No, there was nothing.. She planned it all, I know it.. Heh.. And I didn't see it coming.."

"Child..?" Toriel knocks softly on Frisk's door, "A-are you all right? If I scared you.. I am very sorry."

Frisk gasps, eyes opening wide, "G-go away.. Mo-T-Toriel!"

He shudders, hugging himself, Calling her "Mom" like I did before hurts worse than the memories. I don't deserve her. Toriel frowns on the other side of the door. She rests a hand on the doorknob. It's locked, but she expected as such. She lies her other hand against the door, calling out to Frisk, "My child, I promise.. You have nothing to fear here. I will protect you, with everything I have. Nothing will hurt you here, not while I still breathe."

Frisk crumbles to the floor, "Don't.. Say that.. Please.. I'm.. Not.. I.. Toriel.."

He shudders, covering his face with his hands. Memories of his love for his mother figure is all he has, and they're slowly becoming corrupt by sadistic thoughts of stabbing her, strangling her with her own sheets, murdering her and bringing her back just so he can do it again. All his memories jumble together, making the guilt worse. It doesn't take long before the guilt makes Frisk physically ill.

He vomits nothing but stomach acid, it burns his throat and he cries. Toriel hears him crying and she frowns, forcing the door open. She sees him, curled up in a ball, vomiting, and her eyes soften in worry, "You're ill, child.. Don't worry, I can help with that. I was a mother once, believe it or not."

Later that night, after Frisk stopped throwing up, Toriel gives him homemade medicine to ease his stomach. He takes it without a fight, but he knows it won't do any good. It's my mind that's sick, not my body. Toriel gets him cleaned up, and even tucks him into bed. He doesn't look at her the entire time. He likes her warmth, and doesn't want his mind to ruin the one nice thing he's found today. She kisses his forehead, "Good night, my child. Rest easy."

She turns and heads for the door. She stops in the doorway and turns off the light. Frisk looks at her, and he shakes, trying to ignore the image his mind has now permanently made for her. He speaks softly, trying to keep his voice even, "Frisk."

Toriel turns towards him, "What?"

He swallows, he can see dust rolling off her, "F-Frisk.. My.. N-name.."

She smiles, "Oh. Frisk. How lovely. Well, goodnight, Frisk. Sweet dreams."

She leaves and closes his door. He shudders and rolls over, facing the wall. He closes his eyes, and tries to sleep.