.::I do not own The Outsiders::.

[This chapter is dedicated to Kylelover101 and her baby. Congrats! :)]

28. Letting go

White unopened envelopes, a book with its covered noticeably tattered from being used a lot and some pictures. Ponyboy looked at every object inside one by one starting first with the book. He could easily imagine Johnny reading it in his free time probably smoking a cigarette sitting down on his bed. Some pages were folded on top meaning he had stopped reading there. His fingers gently traced the cover, Gone with the wind. The book he had gifted his friend. A book he would cherish forever.

Next were the pictures. Only four to be exact.

The first one was of Johnny in his army outfit carrying a gun with a grin on his face next to someone who was probably his partner or something. His hair was cut off and his body was much different, a lot more muscular, Guess that training camp worked it's magic. The next one was of him laying down on his bunk bed writing on a piece of paper. His face showed how concentrated Johnny was on writing words to his friends. Ponyboy smiled, He always wrote back. The third picture was of his friend standing straight with other fellow companions saluting the American flag some older man in a uniform held. Ponyboy was mighty impressed at how Johnny changed. And finally the last one, he pursed his lips. This one was actually one of the whole gang his mother had taken months before the accident.

They were all on the porch with their own pose for the picture. Pony was next to Johnny on his left side his elbow resting on his shoulder. Sodapop by his side then Steve. To Johnny's right was Dally, Twobit and his brother lastly Darry. It was all a moment of pure happiness with no problems. Just his friends and his parents. Many years ago. A knot formed in his throat making it painful to swallow. He didn't want to break, at least not yet.

Then there were the envelopes. Seven envelopes. Each one had the name of everyone. Twobit, Dally. Steve... He raised an eyebrow, there was an extra one. Mom. He made a self note to give it to Mrs. Cade before she moved. Ponyboy then grabbed the one with his name on it. Ponyboy. Taking a deep breath he zoned out everything. The low voices that were in the living room, the sound of cars passing by his house, the dim light that seeped into his room. All of his attention was focused on the letter in front of him.

Opening it very carefully the boy licked his lips nervously reading it slowly to digest Johnny's last words:

Dear Ponyboy,

This will probably be my last letter I ever write to you. Last thing I ever get to say anything to you at all. Tonight's gonna be a rough night and I don't know if I'll make it. I'm ain't gonna lie, it's pretty dangerous.

So I'm writing this just in case.

You know, I've read every letter everyones sent me. I'm sure gonna miss you guys. Especially you Pone. You're my best friend. The one who got me to eat one whole cake when we first met, remember? Your Ma telling me how skinny I was? Gosh, your Ma. I miss her too. Your Dad. Good memories...

Ponyboy, if I die out here I don't want you to get sad. I know it's something stupid to say I mean who wouldn't be sad? But really don't. Don't be sad or angry. Don't shut yourself. I know you well enough. You got the gang, you got your brother back.

From the letters you wrote I know you're still pretty angry with Sodapop, but you gotta learn to let go Pony. Let go of all that behind. It's not good for you or anybody. If I die.. you gotta learn to let that go too. Keep on living. Keep on looking at those sunsets we used to watch, those stars at night, all that tuff stuff. You dig?

You're a good person Pony, don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Promise you'll keep on studying to become someone like you told me. Someone in that neighborhood. Make Darry proud, everyone. Hell, I'm proud of you. I mean you got through a lot of things, a lot that nobody could actually take and here you are strong. Pony, you're real tuff. I mean it.

Like I said before, this is probably gonna be my last letter so I just wanna say that you've been a real good friend to me. Thanks for everything. Taking care of my Ma when I wasn't there, writing, the book. Gosh Pone, I really can't thank you enough.

Ponyboy, promise something else...Promise me you'll keep watching those sunsets. Those sunrises. The stars. Maybe the rest won't understand but heck who cares? Keep doing that Pone 'cause that means I'll still be with you watching it too.

I have to go now. Take care of yourself. Remember you're never alone. You got the gang. You're still gonna have me.

I'll miss you.

~Johnny

Ponyboy had to read it twice. Finishing up again the barrier he had created broke. Tears welled up in his eyes while his lips quivered. The numb feeling was gone replaced by sorrow. Sorrow he thought he had dug up. Ponyboy held the letter close to his chest as he cried. As he finally mourned for the death of Johnny. The loss of his friend. He cried for Sodapop's abandonment, for all that pain. The pictures and envelopes spread across the floor, the book on his lap.

"Johnny." He wept to himself, "God damn it...I promise Johnny. I promise."

Locked inside his room Ponyboy cried his soul out until he fell asleep.

That night Darry was off at work still thinking of his brother. Worried. Sodapop had no other choice but to head on to work along with Steve and Twobit. Nobody was home to check up on Ponyboy who had now woken up. He had one thing on his mind, to look for Dally. He knew he was also hurting but with Johnny's letter it could lessen that pain. From what he heard outside his room Winston wasn't at Buck's. Nor at Tim's house. Ponyboy groaned frustrated. Where the hell is he? Walking around town aimlessly he stopped when he heard a familiar voice.

"And what are you gonna do 'bout it, huh ya shit head?"

Pony folded his arms as he saw the familiar Greaser fighting with two Socs. They were ready to get it on with Dally. The first Soc gave the first blow to which Dally reacted quickly and fought back. The second one was trying to grab Dally so they could easily take him down. Ponyboy was there in an instant tackling down one of the Socs. Dallas was on his feet punching a Soc making him stagger backwards.

"What the hell are you doing here, kid?!"

The boy grunted as he tried to get back on his feet, "A thank you woulda been better-uuf!" He was hit on the stomach.

Dally with all his force had his fist on the guy's face knocking him out. The other Soc was now terrified so he left his friend there on the ground running from them. Ponyboy shook his head, "Now that's a good friend," He stated sarcastically.

"How'd you find me?"

Pony shrugged, "Sheer luck?"

Dally snorted as he walked away, "Whatever."

"Hey, wait!"

"Kid I ain't got time right now."

"Just-just listen to me ok? Look, uh. I know you-you're still hurting over...Johnny's death and all but uh-I got something that can...Help."

Dallas looked away, it was true, he was still sad over Johnny. Which is why he distanced himself, he didn't like to feel. He didn't want to. Ponyboy got out the envelope from his pocket handing it over to the older teen.

"The hell is this?"

Pony rolled his eyes, "Just read it."

With hesitation Dally tried opening it but Ponyboy stopped him, "Wait! Don't read it! I mean, not now... Not here. Read it when you feel like you need to. You know, when you're alone."

After that said Ponyboy sighed, he looked up at the sky. It was dark now, he didn't even realize how much time he had been gone from home. Not wanting worry his brothers or friends again like last time he nodded a goodbye to Dally then left. His mission was now complete. Dallas was left standing with the paper in his hands, turning around he decided to drink a beer or two. Go back to Buck's after a long time. Clear his stormy mind in order to read what Ponyboy had given him.

Back at home Ponyboy was greeted by the gang. Sodapop was in the kitchen while Darry was reading the newspaper relieved by Pony's return. Twobit and Steve were arm wrestling bickering on who would be the one to win. Still not speaking he went to his room. He wanted to talk although he felt a little uncomfortable. After all he hadn't talked for days.

Throwing himself against his bed he remembered Johnny's words. Promise me you'll keep watching those sunsets...

"I promise..." Pony mumbled before giving into the darkness.

oOoOoOo

(Sorry for any grammar mistakes)

One more chapter to go! :) Thank you for the previous reviews! I really appreciate them!