Detective Conan and Magic Kaito characters, settings, and ideas do not belong to me but to Aoyama Gōshō.

Warnings: Language, minor violence

TMPD Antics

By Taliya

XC: Kuroba and Hakuba

"Are you hurt, Kuroba-kun?" Saguru asked once he felt Kaito appeared sufficiently recovered from his moment of misty-eyed gratefulness.

Kaito blinked. "No, I'm fine, aside from being kicked in the kidney by KID," he answered as he rubbed his back, and the blond thought back to the flying tackle and probable subsequent scuffle that included both magicians.

Both Shinichi and Heiji frowned, watching Kaito move about with ease. "But KID was shot…" Shinichi murmured. There had been blood spattered on the rooftop. The spray pattern had all the characteristics of being caused by a high-velocity projectile—and under binoculars, KID had flown off with a large crimson splotch on one arm.

"HE WAS?!" Kaito yelped, startling the other three. "Then—that was why he kicked us all off the roof after dousing it in smoke, the sneaky ass!"

"How did he get you all off?" Heiji queried, curious.

Kaito grinned. "He somehow turned the roof into a giant slide and caught all of us in a net on the backside of the museum. It was surprisingly fun!"

"You would think that," Saguru muttered under his breath.

"Well, I'm going home now. Have to show this to Aoko!" the Division Three officer chirped, waving the note. "See you all later!"

Once Kaito had left, the other three stood in stumped silence. Kaito, they had all thought—had been so sure—had to be Kaitou KID. But tonight had disproved it—they even had evidence. The phantom thief's blood had been sampled and whisked away to a lab for analysis. And yet Kuroba Kaito had bounced off without any hint of pain, for with that much blood on the rooftop even the most stoic person would have winced at movement of any kind.

"The bloody fucking hell…?" Saguru voiced in bafflement, and Shinichi and Heiji sighed in mystified agreement.

"You made it out safely?"

"Of course. There was no need to worry about me despite the fact that you pulled me out of 'retirement', so to speak. My apologies that I could not perform any of your signature magic."

"No worries—it was fine since I was able to cover for you. And my deepest apologies about the retirement thing. All the same, thank you for your help tonight, Chat."

"Anytime, KID. Did you really get shot?"

"Nah, faked a hit to get them to move a little faster. Forensics will have evidence that KID is, in fact, a gorgeously rare silky sifaka."

"A silky sif—? Well, it's fitting, if utterly cheeky. You didn't kill the poor animal, did you?"

"What? No! I merely happened to get my hands on a blood sample. And thank you. I rather thought so myself."

"You would. Oh… they're beginning the boarding process, so I do need to go. It was good seeing you again, Kuroba Kaito-san."

"Same here. Have a safe flight, Ruby Jones-san."

Author's Note: … Bet you weren't expecting her, were you? I'm cackling so hard right now at the fruit of my scheming, which actually sounds a little pathetic now that I think about it. Oh well. I thoroughly enjoyed reading all of your guesses and conjectures. It was really impressive how much thought some of you put into trying to figure the trick out. But here's how the two worked it out:

Pre-heist:
Kuroba Kaito = Kuroba Kaito
Kaitou KID = Ruby Jones

Syn-heist:
Kuroba Kaito = Ruby Jones
Kaitou KID = Kuroba Kaito

Post-heist:
Kuroba Kaito = Kuroba Kaito
Kaitou KID = Ruby Jones

Silky sifakas are a critically endangered species of lemur with a full body of long white fur; the word "lemur" is derived from "lemures"—spirits or ghosts in Roman mythology. Fitting for KID, though unfortunately they are predominately diurnal. I hope you enjoyed it.

Completed: 04.08.2016