Author's Note: These chapters are so heartbreaking but nothing is perfect is it? But nothing lasts forever either! It's interesting to write something where everything isn't perfect and completely lovey dovey. Keep reading and reviewing, I appreciate it so much!

The last two and a half weeks have been complete and utter hell for him. The weather was cold and it was constantly dark and gloomy. He found nothing about arid winter weather remarkable or beautiful, it just made him feel more depressed. Stiles hadn't felt quite this screwed up for a while. He wanted to blame her for everything but really he had to blame a lot of it on himself. He had overreacted, and he made himself look like a complete jackass. But he was sensitive, in love, and he had no idea what to think about the whole situation.

She had kissed (or he had kissed her) her ex-boyfriend. The one he was so incredibly jealous of. And she knew how he felt about it. Maybe it wouldn't have been so detrimental to his ego if she hadn't known. That was the worst part, for him at least. She knew Jackson was the one person that made his self-esteem drop, made him question their relationship even at times when they were completely fine. He had always compared himself to her ex, he wished he didn't and he had gotten over the majority of those issues. But her kissing him felt like a complete stab in the back that just kept happening over and over. It was especially painful after they had talked so seriously at a future together, happily married with kids.

Every song he heard made him want to gouge his eyes out, especially when he heard all of the cheesy Christmas tunes that involved romantic love. She never left his mind. When he drove to class or to work, she was always there. He had to get her back. He knew she needed her space and he figured a few weeks would be plenty and he was dying without her. He knew she was probably better off then he and she was probably better off without him, but he had to try. He wasn't going to lose her by just sitting around doing nothing, because that never worked when it came to gaining her affection.

Stiles didn't want to plan things out too much because expectations never seemed to come to fruition for him. But her mother was still hosting her annual Christmas party and he decided that would be the best time to try to talk to her. He texted her once, telling her to have a good day and she had texted him once as well, to wish him luck on his final exams. It was better than nothing, and he hoped they could work things out. At this point he didn't think he could live without her. Now he was praying she wasn't moving on.

"You ready dude?" Scott asked Stiles as the two of them and Allison exited the car. The air was frigid and frosty, snow beginning to pile up on the ground. It was perfect Christmas Eve weather.

"Ready as I'll ever be. I need to see her." He did, he was so sad without her. It's like he was going through withdrawal. He was an addict and Lydia Martin was his drug. He had always thought this, but after their love became mutual it only got worse.

"Got a plan?" Allison asked as the three of them walked up the path to Lydia's childhood home. They'd been in town for a day and a half and he was surprised he was able to hold out on seeing her until now. His dad almost had him talked into it though; the Sheriff was very concerned when he saw the strawberry blonde at the grocery store with her mother and around town in the past two and a half weeks.

"Well not exactly, but mostly because nothing ever goes according to plan."

"True." Allison said as Scott knocked on the door. Stiles' hands were shaky and sweaty as one of Lydia's aunts opened the door and let them in. Stiles stuck with Scott and Allison and did his best to mingle but it was sort of awkward. He was on edge, sweating bullets, anxiety slowly building and then it all suddenly vanished.

There she was. Lydia freaking Martin. Lips painted an enticing shade of red, surrounded by a flawless face, a healthy sheen rose on her cheeks, with a green dress (in the spirit of the holiday) that hugged her body in all the right places, flaunting her gorgeous curves and heels that made even her petite legs go on for days. Just seeing her from fifteen feet away made his knees go weak; it was like he was falling in love with her all over again. It felt like she was the only one in the room, like everything else was blurry and she was crystal clear. She was talking to a few people who lived in town a smile on her face, laughing at something they were saying but he could tell there was a bit of sadness lingering in her eyes, but no one seemed to notice.

He didn't even realize he was staring at her until she glanced over in his direction and locked eyes with him for a split second before he panicked and adverted his eyes in the other direction. He did notice her expression falter though, like she hadn't expected to see him there. When he glanced back over at her she was walking away from the people she had been with.

"I'll be back." Stiles said to Scott as he walked in the same direction Lydia seemed to be heading. She had wandered off to one of the rooms down the hall that wasn't begin occupied at the moment. She was facing the opposite way of the door and he heard a few sniffles as he entered the room cautious and quiet. "Hey." He spoke up, quietly, quite unsure of what to say.

"Hi." She said after turning her head quickly and looking at him for about thirty seconds, she was a little surprised he had the guts to follow her in here. Honestly, looking at him made her angry and happy at the same time. "I didn't know you were coming." She looked down at her feet, alcoholic beverage in hand.

"Oh."

"But it's alright." She said quietly, trying not to look directly at him for too long.

"I just thought, maybe…we could talk." He said after a few seconds of awkward silence.

"I don't know." She wanted to talk to him with every ounce of her being but maybe she wasn't supposed to. Maybe they weren't supposed to be together forever. But it had only been one fight. She didn't want this whole conversation about her being the reason for why things were the way they were, he wasn't innocent in all of this either.

"Please."

"Alright, go on." She took another sip of her drink, he nodded his head, he was nervous. She could tell because she knew his emotions, better than her own sometimes.

"Okay. First I just want to say that these three and a half weeks without you has been like a living hell for me. I miss you more than I could have ever imagined missing anyone before. It was like I lost a part of my…of my soul with you gone, and knowing you left so hurt." He breathed as he paused to study her facial expressions as he moved closer and closer to her with every word he uttered.

"Okay." She remarked as they stood a few feet away from one another, a healthy distance for the both of them. He could tell she didn't want a full-fledged argument to go down, she just looked emotionally drained and he could help but feel like he was to blame for that. But she did seem to be interested in what he was saying despite her effort to remain composed.

"I'm so sorry, for leaving and not talking to you. Not answering your calls, texts, emails, Facebook chats, re-tweets. I'm sorry, I messed up. I was just…scared, you know how insecure I am and I just felt hurt by what you did, even if you were shitface drunk. And you helped me with my insecurity but it kind of resurfaced. It still hurts, especially since it was him and that's why I walked away. I'm a coward, I don't know how to express what I want because I've never been in a relationship before, except for that one time in middle school but that doesn't count, and I don't know how to handle conflict because we're so perfect that we only fight about things that don't even matter." He was rambling but he didn't care, he would fix this because he had experienced the second most dreadful period of his life (his mother dying was obviously the worst experience of his life) and it hurt so much because this was partly and actually his fault.

"Mhm." He could see the emotion on her face that she was trying to bury. That cool, calm, collected wall beginning to falter. Maybe it's because he knew her like the back of his hand as well. He swore he could see her eyes shinny with tears that threatened to spill over. She set her drink down carefully on one of the side table tops.

"I just, I don't know how to do this. I've never done this whole emotional journey thing with anyone but you, and that's okay, but that's why I'm here right now. I'm sorry for walking out on you and not listening. All I ever wanted was you and I don't know how I could just walk away after wanting you more than anything. And I just want you to come back to me, with me, back to our apartment. I want to be with you. I'll say 'I'm sorry' as many times as I have to you to get you to come back. I miss you."

His face was beet red, he barley took a breath as he spoke all of those words to her, and he somehow managed to get everything out that he wanted to confess to her. Their bodies had moved closer to one another as he talked and rambled. Her face was pale but her emotional barrier was falling, her body was so used to being with him that it knew he was safe. She wanted to hate him for leaving her, but she knew that wasn't him. He saw his opportunity as he inched closer to her. He saw it hanging there, just under the ceiling fan, a part of the festive decorations. Like an omen that needed to be fulfilled.

"I…" she began as he stared into his bronze eyes as a single tear fell out of hers. Before she could finish her thought, his face inched oh so closely to hers. His hand reached to her cheek and his thumb brushed the stray tear away. She blushed but relished in the comfort he was bring her. He leaned in close; faces so close to touching, she felt her face try to form a questioning look as his fingers stroked her face.

"It's okay…we have to. We're under the mistletoe." He said without even giving her a chance to think straight before he pressed his lips to her red stained ones. He could feel that she was still surprised by it but slightly amused. Amused because all of the bad luck something like mistletoe could bring to many of their friends, but hope it could bring to them. The kiss was smooth, and chaste, neither fought it. Her hands laying lightly on his torso while one of his was still on her cheek, moving to the back of her head, the other resting on her hip.

"I'm…I'm sorry too." She admitted as soon as they were done, taking in a deep breath. The guilt was there still on her face. "It wasn't all your fault. But I miss you too."

"So does this mean you're coming back?"

"Yeah, I guess I just needed some time too." She admitted, she did a lot of evaluation about her life over the past weeks, evaluation that just made her want him more. Even though she wasn't sure if that was really fate's plan for her.

"Oh thank God." He breathed a sigh of relief. Their arms were still wrapped around her, needing her touch after not having it for almost a month's time.

"But if we're going to be back together, we need to be able to communicate if things get bad like that. No running away for a week or more. It doesn't really work out."

"Agreed. I can do that. Anything to have you back with me." His emotions played out on his face, he loved her so much she could hardly stand to watch it on him.

"God I love you." She said after placing both of her hands on his cheeks, reminded of that one time he had that panic attack he couldn't come down from. And for the first time all night a genuine smile flashed across her lips.

"I love you too." He said as she leaned into kiss him and he wrapped his arms around her waist, bringing her as close to him as he could possibly manage.

"As soon as I get the chance, I'm totally going to have to show you just how much." She said winking as she stepped away from him and headed towards the door. His eyes nearly popped out of his head. "Come on, we have to go. What kind of hostess am I being if I'm all alone with you?" She asked as she waited for him to follow her. He finally got up, grabbing her glass from the side table and walking towards her, grabbing he hand with his free one and intertwining their fingers. She smiled shyly up at him, yes, this felt like how it was supposed to be. Things weren't completely perfect or back to normal yet, but this was a start, and that's more than either could ask for. And for once they had mistletoe for being a antidote to a problem instead of the catalyst.