A giant spaceship flew overhead. It took a moment from Miss Quill to recognize it, because she just wasn't used to seeing that sort of thing.
"Odd," said Miss Quill to herself. After a mental review of her schedule, she decided to check it out. It took some concentration, but she eventually tracked down the craft.
One of the first things she noticed was how large it was. It was about the size of a elderly Quill, who could grow to about 10 feet high. The designs on it reminded her of the Arkiath species, a group of trader species that the Quill had slaughtered some time before Miss Quill was born. The doorway, about half Quill's height, opened up with a slick squelching sound. Out slithered what looked like a giant mole rat, but with spines on its front and back, as well as tentacles on its lower half. The creature blinked, and pointed at Miss Quill.
"Do you know Ramesh Singh?" asked the giant mole rat.
"If I do, what do I get out of letting you know?" asked Miss Quill.
"About 2,000,000 werts," said the giant mole rat. (A wert is worth about 4 American dollars.)
"Oh, then you have no idea how well I know him," said Miss Quill.
The giant mole rat, whose actual name is Rithia, was not the only one looking for Ram. April and Tanya were also looking for Ram.
"Is it the Shadowkin? Maybe they've decided to take revenge?" said April. Her eyes were glowing red, and shadows were oozing out of her hands, like the shadow blades were itching to come out.
"Probably not. You would have felt it right?" asked Tanya.
"Yeah, but maybe not. And who knows how long ago Ram was attacked!" said April.
"Around 37 minutes, 23 seconds...sorry, can't be anymore accurate than that," said Zoe.
"Um, okay. How do you know that?" asked Tanya, laughing.
"It's obvious. Based on the residue from the scorch marks, the number of animal barks in the surrounding area (indicating that the birds felt comfortable enough to return), and the look of the footprints, I calculated it couldn't be more than a half-hour. Add the 7 minutes and 23 (now 65) seconds of us walking, and voila! Also, there were 3 attacking guys, and 1 guy running away. The attacking guys are either heavy or really fat, and use pew-pew weapons," said Zoe.
"Oh. That's rather smart of you," said Tanya.
"I know. It's because I'm a genius," said Zoe, smiling widely.
"Do you have any idea where he might be?" asked April
"I think he's in that flower bush," said Zoe.
"Why would you think that?" said Tanya. To April, Tanya sounded almost annoyed.
"Because a man in that flower bush is waving at us," said Zoe.
Indeed, Ram Singh was hiding under some flowers. Usually, April would laugh, but right now, she was just happy to see her boyfriend alive.
"Was it the Shadowkin?" said April. She could hear the battle pulse of the Shadowkin rushing through her. If Corakinus had hurt her lover, there would be hell to pay.
Ram's eyes were wide with terror. He slowly shook his head.
"Worse. It was walking, talking rhinoceroses with large guns that shoot out lasers," said Ram.
There was a short pause. April looked at Ram, and realized he was absolutely serious.
"So, the thing that terrified you was a talking rhino?" said Tanya.
"Rhinos. With guns. They wanted to arrest me for offending a tourist, or something. And, you know, I wasn't terrified. Just startled," said Ram, standing up straight and brushing dirt off himself.
"You should get a new concubine, King. This one's very dull," said Zoe.
"Do you even know what that word means?" asked Tanya.
"Sure I do. I'm just not going to tell you, because, um, you wouldn't understand its complexities," said Zoe.
"Who is that girl?" asked Ram.
Zoe held out her hand, and said "I am a servant of April, the Shadow King, and I will help her conquer-"
"She's a friend of mine. Anyway, we need to find Charlie and Miss Quill. Maybe they know what's going on," said April.
"About what?" said a familiar voice. April turned around, to see Miss Quill standing there. Bizarrely, Miss Quill was smiling. Not the half-smirk she usually carried, but an actual grin. Quill's hands were behind her back, as she walked slowly to the group.
"Ram was attacked by an alien. Apparently, he attacked a tourist," said Tanya.
"Accused of attacking a tourist. He didn't do it," said April. She turned back to look at Ram, who gave an "as if" look.
"Can you help us?" asked Tanya.
"Yes!" said Miss Quill, smiling widely. She ran over to Ram, and grabbed him into her arms. She looked him up and down, and nodded slowly.
"I am taking this young man to a safe place. When you see him next, he'll be perfectly happy. I always take care of my students," said Miss Quill, tousling Ram's hair.
"Not really," mutterred Tanya. Miss Quill's eyes flared, as if she was ready to fire back an insult. But then the teacher's face returned to a smile, and she said nothing.
"Wait. Why are you being so helpful?" asked Ram.
"Why wouldn't I be?" asked Miss Quill.
"Because you dislike all your students," said Tanya. April and Ram nodded their agreement.
Miss Quill opened her mouth to disagree, and then shrugged.
"Yeah, you're right, though I dislike your little group the least. Well, there's goes being subtle," said Miss Quill, who whistled. From the bushes came two giant mole rats, each carrying a large blade, each with a mass of tentacles instead of legs.
"What's going on?" said Ram.
"I've been offered some money, in return for a deal. The original deal required you to die, Ram," said Miss Quill.
"What?" said Ram, trying to get out of Miss Quill's grip, and finding out that she was stronger than she looked.
"Don't worry. I convinced them not to kill you. Wouldn't really be a good teacher if I allowed that," said Miss Quill.
"Oh. Thanks," said Ram, who stopped struggling.
Miss Quill gave a bone-chilling shark grin, and said "All they're going to do now is cut off your alien-tech leg."
"WHAT?" asked Ram.
The middle mole rat swung his cleaver in Ram's direction, clearly ready to get to work.
Before the rat could get any closer, April ran toward the three butchers, shadow swords in tow.
"If you lay a hand on my boyfriend, I will skewer you so hard, your mothers will cry at the thought of you," said April.
The butchers looked at Miss Quill, who shrugged.
"April, don't," said Ram, struggling to get out of Miss Quill's grasp.
"It won't even hurt. Just one snip, and then only a few screams. I'll even share the 8,000,000 dollar award with you," said Miss Quill.
"Seriously? 8 million?" said Ram.
April ignored both of them. She was blocking the blows of the three butchers. April carried the battle knowledge of Corakinus, a warrior who had never been defeated, until April had battled him. These butchers, on the other hand, weren't used to war, and kept on leaving easy openings for April to use. However, these butchers did have both better bulk, and better speed, and didn't really seem to feel pain.
"Why won't you just die?" said April, as she cut tentacle after tentacle off.
"Miss April, I really wouldn't do that," said Miss Quill.
Green blood covered April's swords, face, and clothes. Her eyes were glowing red, and a dark smile crept onto her face.
"Do you think today is a day to lecture me, teacher?" asked April.
"Sorry. I just wanted to point out. That species' tentacles are like hydra's heads—cut one off, and well..." said Miss Quill.
"April, behind you!" said Tanya, who had been hiding with Zoe in the flower patch.
April turned, and saw 7 more tentacled mole rats. One piece of tentacle was growing, wriggling, and beginning to reform into its own mole rat.
"You have got to be kidding me," said April.
Ram suddenly pointed at something behind April.
"Ram, it would help if you just told me what was behind me, instead of pointing," said April.
April felt a gun at her head. She slowly turned around, to see a rhinoceros, upright on its hindlegs, pointing a gun at her.
"Put down your weapons, hybrid. We are here to arrest Ramesh Singh, by the order of the Shadow Proclamation. Do not interfere," said the rhinoceros.
"See! Talking rhinoceroses!" said Ram.
"Oh. This might be an issue," said Miss Quill.