BPOV
When I finally got to the meadow Edward was already there. He didn't even give me a chance to win but its ok I deserve that and more. I walked to where Edward was sitting and proceed to sit down myself.
"Can we just talk I don't want to fight right now?" I asked and took his hand into mine.
"Bella you told me there was nothing left between you guys. But now he can kiss you and flirt with you no problem and it's not fair. I don't like it, I am your boyfriend not him. He shouldn't be the one kissing your neck and making you feel all special. Ever since he got here you and I haven't been the same. All we used to do is come down here and spend time together and now in 3 short days everything has changed. He has this effect on you that I don't approve of and really I just want my Bella back." He said and I can tell by his expression that he has been holding that in for quite some time.
"Edward, I don't know what to tell you. I love you but Damon being here has brought up some feelings I can't deny. But I told him that I wouldn't make the same mistake as Katherine and that he just can't come here and think that I will fall for him all over again. I don't understand it either he is bringing out this old side of me that I used to love being. But I have also grown into the person I am today. Part of me believes that I still love Damon and that I should return to him. But then I know that I shouldn't that I should stay with you because we work and we have a connection that I never had with Damon. There is no way to explain it really but with everything that's been going on lately it's been easier to just let myself be. I have no control over myself when I'm with Damon and that's my problem. Also you have to realize that Damon and I are friends, we have been for 30 years now. I know him the way he knows me. We are basically in sync. Today we went over the line but in my mind it was natural. It was Good ole Damon and Bella hunting again. Really there was nothing to it. But Edward I love you and if this is a problem I totally understand. But I have to help them with this, we have to kill Katherine." I told him; I'm usually not the one for long speeches but I had to let him know. This isn't a game; this is real life I have to lay my cards out on the table. Edward needed to know how I feel because it's not fair to him.
"Edward there is a possibility that I might still be in love with Damon and if that's the case then I might leave you for him. Edward I love you but I don't want to play with your emotions so I'm going to tell you the truth from now on. I want to be with you but I still have strong feelings for Damon." I looked at him and I can tell that my words hurt him. But the truth hurts and I need to let it out.
"Then why bother with me Bella. He is obviously willing. He wants you back and you want him. Why don't you just dump me now and go with him? If this is about us helping to kill Katherine the by all means don't let that stop you on my account. We will still help you with your plan but don't just string me along. Bella I can deal …" I cut him off
"Do you really believe I would be so shallow as to string you along because I needed your help? Edward how could you think so low of me? Did you not here my story on how Damon left me for another in the past. He hurt me Edward and I still haven't forgiven him for that. I can't accept him back into my life, just so when we find Katherine he runs off into the sunset with her without thinking twice about me. No Edward I can't handle that pain again. He has to earn my trust and I'm not 100% sure if I can give it to him again. I am not lying when I say that you and I have a connection that I never had with Damon. I'm in love with you Edward you make me happy and make me feel loved and cared for. You cherish me and make me feel like I'm the only girl in the world. I absolutely love that the most about you. I love that you are always there for me and have never let me down. That's why I am still undecided. That's why I am still with you and haven't run off with Damon. I never faked my love for you Edward that was always real." I stroked the side of his cheek and he gave me a shy smile.
"Do you really mean that Bella?" He asked me hopeful; I stared deep into his eyes and said
"Yes I do Edward."
"Then I'm going to fight for you. I won't lose you Bella. I will fight for you and hope to keep you. I won't let Damon win. Thank you for telling me the truth; but Bella if he is the one to make you happy then go to him I won't be upset with you. I want you to be happy and if I'm not the one I will understand completely. Just promise me that you will always be honest with me." He grabbed my hands and looked me in the eyes. Pleading with me to fulfill this one request; how could I say no? He deserved all that and more.
"Of course Edward I promise." And with that I leaned forward to kiss him. I moved closer until I was on his lap and deepened the kiss. He licked my bottom lip asking for an entrance and I let him in. I ran my hands through his hair and he wrapped his arms around my waist. I pushed back and lay on top of him without breaking the kiss. Edward pulled away first.
"Bella why don't we do it? We're here in our special spot. I want to make love to you please let me." He asked me. As I looked around I noticed how perfect this place is for Edwards first time. This is where we had our first date and where we first said I love you. This is where Edward and I should have sex for the first time. I nodded my head and leaned in again to kiss him nut he pulled away. "Really Bella?" I nodded again and he suddenly got nervous; I could see it in his eyes.
"Edward everything will be fine I know it will be. Come on let make love, I know you want to…" and with that he pulled back down to him and kissed me passionately. I started to unbutton his shirt and feel hi chest. We pulled away and I pulled off my shirt and continued to kiss him. After that everything went in vamp speed. I took off my pant and he his, we continued until there was only one thing left to do. We made love over and over again and it was perfect. Nothing could ruin the moment we were finally one.
Because I Still Love You
A/N Please don't hate me? I know it's been a while since I updated and for that I'm sorry. I have been really busy and haven't found much time to write much. School is starting soon so I don't know when I will be able to update again. So please bear with me I will try my best to get chapters up as soon as possible. A little lemon this was my first time writing something like that so let me know how I did. Love you Beautiful people I haven't forgotten about you!