AN: Thanks again for those that have reviewed and continue to read this story. I know I don't update often and that bothers some readers. All I can say is that I'm doing the best I can and chapters sometimes take a while to come together. I wish I could update every week I really do. My full time job and two children can also be a barrier for me getting time to work on a new chapter. Hopefully there are still some interested people out there...leave a review please to keep me motivated :) This chapter is a lot shorter than usual but it's just how it came together this time...consider yourself warned :)
I'm also looking for some feedback about the story content and future ideas...drop me a line..someone PM me and said it would add to Nathan's story if Haley died...thoughts?
~~~ "I'm Never Alone, I'm Alone All the Time" ~~~
* Chapter Thirty -Two*
Nathan studied the device placed in Haley's mouth assisting her to breathe until her own lung healed properly. Everything around him seemed surreal. He wasn't really sitting by her hospital bedside. This didn't really happen to her. It had to be a dream, no a nightmare he was having. If only he could wake himself from it. He squeezed his eyes shut for a second and slowly opened them. Nothing had changed. He noted the pale color of her skin uncertain if it was due to the unflattering florescent lighting or a result of the accident. He resisted reaching out to touch her cheek for fear he'd cause her more pain by touching the fresh cuts on her face. He truly wanted nothing more than to climb in bed next to her and hold her close. He wanted to fix this, fix her. He'd spent the last ten minutes telling her how much he loved her and how strong she was. It took everything in him to keep his voice steady for her.
"Baby, they said you can hear me and if you can…squeeze my hand or move your fingers…please….something." He pleaded to her and waited for a reaction.
He watched her hand for the slightest of movement but found nothing. He took a deep breath and leaned down to kiss her hand.
Chris joined Quinn and Clay in the lounge after he finished his call with Peyton. He noticed right away Quinn now appeared angry instead of sad.
"What's going on?" He asked as he sat down across from Clay.
Quinn groaned and cross her arms in front of her chest clearly in frustration. Chris waited for Quinn to respond for a moment but then turned towards Clay for an answer.
"It would appear the James' will be unable to alter their travel plans to come to California after all." Clay finally answered.
Chris' jaw dropped open before he replied, "You're shitting me? They seriously aren't coming!"
Quinn merely shook her head no. The three of them sat in silence together no doubt all processing the evenings events.
"I finally spoke with Peyton." Chris said out of the blue breaking the silence and changing the subject entirely.
"And?"
"I gave her the update on Haley's injuries and current condition. She said she'd get the next flight out and probably be here by tomorrow morning. She was surprisingly quiet and calm about it all." Chris answered.
"Peyton quiet? Maybe she's in shock." Quinn suggested in somewhat disbelief. Normally Peyton Sawyer had an angle on everything and was always ready for what came next. Of course she hadn't been anticipating her best client to suddenly be in the hospital in critical but stable condition.
"Guess we'll see tomorrow. Think we could head back to the room yet?" Chris asked the couple.
Quinn looked at the clock on the wall and couldn't believe it was three in the morning.
"I don't want to rush Nathan or anything but Dr. Bennett said he'd be rounding again soon with an update. I don't want to miss him either." Quinn answered. She rose to her feet in one swift movement and waited a moment for the two reliable men in her life to follow her.
Nathan couldn't help himself any longer. He stood to his feet and leaned over the bed hovering over Haley's face. He slowly brought his lips to the only bare spot of her forehead he could see without a bruise or cut.
"I promise you Haley…..I meant what I said….always and forever.." he said with certainty only to be startled when he heard the door open again.
Quinn walked in first closely followed by Chris and Clay.
"Has the doctor been back yet?" Quinn asked as she moved to the opposite side of the bed as Nathan. She studied his face from across the way and could've sworn he had tears in his eyes.
"The nurse came in a few minutes ago and said he was preparing for Haley to have another CT scan." Nathan answered as he met Quinn's gaze. He couldn't help but notice how frightened she really looked.
Quinn nodded and looked down to notice Haley's hand remained within Nathan's grasp. It was evident he didn't intend on going anywhere any time soon. She felt a sense of relief knowing Haley had someone else to depend on.
Dan had spent the last few hours attempting to find out any new information regarding Haley's accident. He held off attempting to contact Nathan knowing he'd be caught up with post-game interviews and press. It wasn't until he received a call from the Clippers General Manager informing him about the fine Nathan would be issued for leaving the arena without proper authorization. Dan was dumbfounded by Nathan's impulsive action to just take off and leave. Nathan managed to get a flight back to L.A. on short notice and hadn't needed Dan to make a "call" for him. Dan found it unsettling the more independent Nathan had become as of recently.
He set his smartphone back down on the table next to him not really surprised Nathan hadn't picked up when he'd called. He glanced at the time again and contemplated for a few moments about heading down to the hospital himself. He knew he'd get answers that way but it wasn't the best move for him to play. Yet anyways.
Damien wasn't sure when he'd fully sobered up as he sat on his couch watching the television for any coverage about Haley. He knew he was only torturing himself and making matters worse but he couldn't help himself. The guilt was almost nearly consuming him and it hadn't even been 24 hours since the accident. He knew Dan had told him to lay low and truth be told he'd have to. There was no way he'd be able to go out in public and keep himself together. Unfortunately he was fighting off the strong urge he had to visit Haley himself. He knew it was crazy and he wouldn't be able to even get to her room without some serious break in hospital security. He couldn't help it. That was one of the amazing things about Haley James. She had a quality about her that drew people towards her without her even trying so. One thing was clear, Damien West sat alone in the dark regretting the Dan he ever agreed to go into business with Dan Scott.
It was almost dawn when Dr. Bennett finally changed Haley's condition to stable. She'd passed her latest CT scan and the swelling around her brain hadn't gotten worse. In fact it was slowly decreasing giving Haley's loved ones a small sense of relief. After Quinn received the news, she finally seemed to breathe with ease. She found comfort that once the swelling went down, Haley would be able to wake up. Haley's oxygen stats hadn't dropped either in the last three hours which was also encouraging.
Quinn had been convinced to at least stretch out in the family lounge for a few hours after Chris and Clay promised to wake her if something had changed. Clay had resisted pulling the pregnant card for as long as he could but finally Quinn needed to be forced to rest. She appeared a bit sluggish and out of sorts sparking concern from Clay not to mention she looked completely exhausted. He quietly asked Haley's nurse if she could quick take Quinn's blood pressure and was grateful he had. It really took the nurse informing Quinn her blood pressure was slightly elevated to get her to think about her baby and not just baby sister.
Nathan glanced over at Chris who was currently dozing in the chair by the window. They'd spoken on and off after Clay and Quinn left the room mostly about Haley. Nathan was glad Chris had finally fallen asleep though. Not that he didn't want to talk with him, he'd just started to run out of stuff to talk about with Chris. Chris Keller was the type of guy that definitely marched to the beat of his own drum. It was evident the bond he had with Haley was pure and genuine. They were best friends. Nathan was startled from his thought by his iPhone in his pocket vibrating.
He begrudgingly pulled it out and was pleased to see it was a text message from Brooke.
'Luke gave me the latest update on Haley. Sorry I didn't text sooner but my show just got done. Stay strong Nate and I'm here if you need to talk or vent or whatever. Of all the times for me to leave the country though….dammit I wish I was still in L.A. right now. Love U!'
Nathan cracked a small thankful smile after reading Brooke's text message. If Brooke had actually been in town he knew she'd have camped out in the general waiting room just in case Nathan needed her. If she wasn't there, she'd have been back at his house cleaning it from top to bottom, stocking the kitchen full of food and doing his laundry to try and help him out. Brooke may not always be the best person to handle a crisis but she found her own ways to provide love and support to those she cared about. Nathan quickly typed a response and tapped send on his phone.
'I just want her to wake up soon. I know what the doctors are saying but I won't believe them until I see her awake. This waiting is killing me….you know how I hate hospitals. Love you too Brookie Monster.'
He shifted again in the folding chair he'd barely left since he arrived at the hospital. Nathan only left Haley's side to go to the bathroom and was back in record speed. He just couldn't seem to leave her nor did he want to. He felt a pull from Haley since the very first time their paths crossed and it had only intensified under the current circumstances. He didn't want to miss it if she woke up or if God forbid her condition changed for the worse. His large frame wasn't made to sit on the small folding chair for an extended period of time. Something that was becoming more evident as the aches began to develop in his back and legs. He contemplated residual effects from the game he'd played hours earlier as the culprit as well. He slowly leaned down towards the bed and placed a kiss on Haley's hand he'd been cradling in his.
"Ohhh Haley…..it's weird to see your body so still like this. Your boundless energy and vibrant smile…I can't take….you've gotta wake up soon. I need you to wake up soon." Nathan pleaded in a hushed tone. He couldn't help how his voice broke towards the end. He rested his head on her bed as he gazed up at her face with a watchful eye. His fingers slide down her hand and found her pulse on her wrist. It felt strong and he found the steady rhythm relaxing as his eyes slowly closed.
Chris had waited several minutes before he moved from his place. He'd woken up and saw Nathan on his phone most likely texting. Just as he opened his mouth to speak, Nathan began talking to Haley. Chris looked on and couldn't help but feel his heart break for Nathan. He waited until Nathan had been quiet for a while before he finally spoke.
"Hey Nate, uhhh I think I'm going to go find some coffee and something to eat. What do you want?" Chris asked as he slowly stretched his right arm above his head.
Nathan looked back at Chris a bit startled and answered, "I'm good thanks."
Chris' face fell and he replied, "Come on, you must be starving after the game last night and it is around breakfast time. I'll get whatever you want."
"Keller, I'm fine." He refused again more sternly the second time around.
Chris stood up as he let out a defeated sigh. He took a few steps towards Haley's bed to get a closer look at her. He watched Nathan's eyes turn back towards Haley's face once more.
"Her coloring is looking better." Chris stated out of nowhere.
"Yeah, it is." He agreed but didn't offer anymore.
"OK, I'm going to check with Clay and Quinn to see what they want. I should check in with Walker and Peyton to see where they're at too. Hales, I'm off to find you a chocolate covered donut so you better be awake when I get back to eat it." Chris teased and let his hand drop to caress Haley's foot that was underneath the blanket. He found himself smiling as he thought about their tour and the battle they'd had over the last chocolate donut one night somewhere in the middle of Nebraska. Haley held her own for a while however inevitable Chris had won the donut.
After checking with Clay and Quinn to get their breakfast order, Chris found his way to the hospital cafeteria. He managed to find all requested items without too much trouble. He'd heard from Walker and knew he'd be arriving at L.A.X in about three hours. He was surprised he'd gotten Peyton's voicemail considering the current circumstances. Maybe she was still in flight. Chris headed back to the family lounge area with everyone's breakfast. Clay motioned for him to be quiet as he entered the room noting Quinn was still sleeping finally. Chris glanced over at Quinn who was fast asleep on a couch across the room and then joined Clay at the table.
"Coffee!" Clay replied with a small smile. He happily grabbed the cup from Chris and brought it to his lips quickly.
"Haley's color looks a lot better this morning so hopefully that means she'll wake up soon." Chris said as he watched Clay nod.
"God, I hope so. Quinn finally agreed to rest only after the nurse actually told her too." Clay admitted quietly after sneaking a glance over at Quinn's sleeping form.
"The nurse?" Chris questioned with a puzzling look to match.
Clay sat forward in his chair and rested his elbows on top of the table. "She's brushing it off like it's no big deal at this stage and maybe she's right. But her blood pressure was elevated and the nurse took it three times just to make sure." Clay confessed.
"That can happen to anyone with stress and I hate to tell you but this qualifies as a stressful situation." Chris stated before he shoved a piece of donut in his mouth.
Clay offered a worried look to Chris before adding, "With her family history we need to be careful about her blood pressure and about stress. It's just….the nurse seemed really worried."
They sat in silence as they welcomed the caffeine into their systems hoping it would help them tackle the day ahead.
Nathan didn't flinch when he heard the door to Haley's hospital room open and close again. The nurse had left a few minutes ago after checking Haley's vitals and he anticipated Quinn to make an appearance shortly. In fact she'd been gone for the last several hours much to his surprise.
"I was starting to wonder where you've been Qui…" Nathan started to say without turning around at first. He was silenced mid-sentence once the face of Haley's visitor came into view. They locked eyes and for a few seconds there was silence between them. The only sound in the room was the steady beeping sound from Haley's heart monitor. It was a moment both knew would happen sooner or later.
"Nathan.."
He didn't move from his place next to her bed to properly greet the visitor.
"You're still here.."
"Excuse me but where else do you think I'd be." He interjected harshly instantly on the defense.
"I'm sorry I didn't mean it like that. It's good you came."
"You must be Peyton Sawyer, Haley's manager. Chris said something about you arriving this morning." Nathan stated bluntly without offering his hand for her to shake.
Peyton brushed a loose curl off her face as she walked over to the other side of Haley's bed. She glanced down while fully taking in Haley's physical state. Nathan watched her closely suddenly the urge to be protective over Haley nearly consumed him.
"I was in New York on business but took the first flight out after my deal closed. I briefly spoke with the nurse when I arrived and got an update on Haley's status. You must be completely exhausted from last night and everything. I'm sure you'd like to get some sleep and probably a shower." Peyton replied as she set her purse down on the chair Chris had occupied earlier. She allowed her eyes to give him a harsh once over.
"I'll be fine." He shot back without missing a beat.
"I bet you've got practice or a game or something to get ready for today. I'll have someone call you when she wakes up if you'd like." Peyton suggested trying her best to sound sweet and caring.
Nathan stood up from his seat and was pleased when he towered over Peyton. He looked into Peyton's eyes for a moment before he responded matter of factly.
"You'll have to work harder than that to get rid of me." Nathan fired back as he crossed her arms across his chest instantly angry with her previous statement.
Peyton's right eyebrow rose slightly as she challenged back, "Is that so?"
"Peyton, you don't scare me and I'm staying. End of discussion." He added his voice dripped with distain for the woman standing across from him.
Peyton let out a forced laugh and then said, "You have no idea who I am or what I'm capable of Nathan Scott. I can make it impossible for you to visiting her so I would be a little more respectful when speaking to me. If you know what's good for you, you'll just back off completely."
"Like hell I will." Nathan snapped back louder this time not caring who heard them.
Chris headed back down the hallway towards the nurses' station and figured he'd check in with Haley's' nurse once he saw her standing at the desk.
"Anything new to report on our favorite patient." Chris asked with his cheeky smile.
She looked up from her chart with a smile and answered, "Her vitals are looking excellent actually. Better than we hoped for at this point in her recovery. Maybe Haley's new visitor will bring good luck and she'll finally wake up."
"New visitor? I thought Walker was going to be a while yet. Sweet!"
"Nope, according to the record Peyton Sawyer is here." The nurse replied after looking down at the clipboard on the desk.
Chris' eyes shot open as he suddenly realized Nathan Scott was alone in a hospital room with Peyton Sawyer.
"Shit…thanks" Chris muttered and then took off back towards the family lounge. He burst through the room not caring how much noise he made.
"Dammit Chris!" Clay exclaimed in surprise. Quinn was startled awake and sat up in shock as well.
"Is it Hales?" Quinn asked in a hushes voice.
Chris shook his head no quickly and answered, "No she's not awake yet."
"What the hell then." Clay muttered after looking at Quinn's panicked expression.
"Quinn…Peyton is in her room."
"OK sooo she's finally here." Quinn said feeling out of the loop from her brief rest.
Clay was able to answer before Chris had the chance. "Nathan hasn't left Haley's side since he got here."
"Oh shit!" Quinn said and then shoved her shoes back quickly before she took off after Chris towards Haley's room. There would be safety in numbers when dealing with Peyton and unfortunately she knew Nathan was going to need all the help he could get. She'd known Haley had made a point to prevent the two from meeting wanting to keep Nathan from Peyton's grasps as long as possible in fear of what might happen.
Chris pushed the door open and let Quinn walk through first. They were instantly greeted with an eruption of heated voices clearly in disagreement.
"You're completely out of line! She'd want me here and you've got your head so far up your ass to see that!" Nathan shouted back in response to Peyton's last dig. He knew what he was doing was wrong but he couldn't seem to stop himself. His judgment was being clouded once again by his anger.
"Please! You've been in her life for all of five minutes…trust me I'll be around long after you're gone lover boy." Peyton fired not bothering to hold back any longer.
"Guys! Stop it both of you!" Quinn shouted above both of them. Nathan and Peyton were silenced by the sight of Quinn, Chris and Clay at the foot of Haley's bed looking shocked by what they had walked in on.
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