"You have beautiful eyes"

Entry 14 - Internet Friends

Orihime walked in and sat on my bed, she had her jar of weed and Kagome and I sat up with her before I moved to the desk, taking the jar and cracking it open. I put my weed at the bottom of the bowl and drizzled Orihimes on top before handing the freshly packed water pipe to Kagome. She took it then gave it a look as she pulled a lighter from her pocket.

"I still cant believe you" She mumbled as she gave a soft smirk at me. I shrugged and criss-crossed my legs as I sat on computer chair. She placed her mouth to the top of the bong and with one hand she held the base and the other held the lighter as she flicked it on and sucked as hard as she could, taking in the smoke from the burning bowl of weed. When the smoke reached the top, she released the flame then quickly snatched the bowl out and with the last of her breath available to her she took in the remaining, thick, fog of smoke. She attempted to hold it in but didnt get past 5 seconds when she started coughing up her lungs. I laughed as the coughing continued, taking the bong from her. She covered her mouth in an attempt to contain her loud coughs but it only made things worse. I took a hit as Orihime rubbed Kagomes back with evil laughter. I released my smoke and chuckled more then laughed harder as she gagged and ran to the bathroom

"Hows the weed Zave?"I called out from in the room as I heard her continuously cough. Zavier was Kagomes internet persona. When I first met her, for the first 3 years she acted as a male. I believed, for that time period, that she really was a male. It wasnt till the 4th year when she told me all those skype calls was her brother talking to me and for some reason I wasn't at all mad. I never seen her more relieved in my life and since then, we've been inseparable. Of course when I told Sasuke his response was "I figured."

She came back into the room with watery eyes and a laugh. She took in a deep breath then let it out with a 'woooo' upon exhale. She sat back on the bed and shook her head with another chuckle.

"That weed is no joke" She laughed. Kagome was a hardcore stoner like Sasuke. Sasuke lives out in the mountains and Kagome lived out in the country so you could imagine the hard troubles they had to come by really good weed. "I wish I could take some home" She said with a smile as she took the bong again, it coming back to her. She took a softer hit then watched as I hit it hard. At the time I never realized how hard I was hitting it. I had good lungs I suppose because every hit I took was hard and non-effective. All I remember was when I was taught, Renji kept egging me to 'hit it harder, HARDER' He would say over and over. She raised her brows as I handed the bong to Orihime for her to repack for later. "Wow...I never thought I would see the day. What'd Sasuke say?" She asked, leaning back. I shrugged and responded.

"He wouldn't believe me till I skyped with him and showed him" I smiled. She laughed and nodded, looking at Orihime as she spoke.

"That'd be my response" She smirked then paused and looked to me. I tilted my head in confusion, wondering why her mood changed. "How is he..." She mumbled. Orihime paused and I paused. I hear her clear her throat and stand with the bong.

"I have to go call Tatsuki and confirm things regarding the puppy" She said. We didn't respond. She walked out the room and closed the door behind her. I looked down at my lap and took in a breath.

...

Here is a bit of backstory on Sasuke and I . I had met him in a total of 9 years ago now. I had a difficult childhood growing up. It wasn't super horrible but It was very depressing. My brother was/still is a very powerful man that did bad things. Growing up I was always faced with being without him. My mother left when I was 3 days old, leaving me to my brother and he leaving me to our grandpa Yamamoto due to the fact that he couldn't have me around that kind of lifestyle. SO growing up was easy. My grandfather and I have been super close since day one because of it. I was blessed with a good life till I was about 9. My brother started picking me up more and more, started taking me to his house over time until the day came when my grandfather told me he was moving to america. I would be living with Byakuya from now on. My grandfather left me with what he thought would be a safe place because he seen his grandson coming around more and more. Little did he know it was an act because I met my sister in law and her kids. She had moved in too and brought her children. Throughout my years I suffered emotional, mental and a little bit of physical abuse from this woman. She hated me. My brother was just as much gone now as he was when I was living with papa Yamamoto. My Sister in law hated it and took it out on me every time he was away. She hated that I ALWAYS got the master bedroom. My big brother spoiled me in exchange for his absence and she hated it. Every time he was home, the house was filled with yelling and My name came up 70% of the time in each fight. This is what made me sensitive, closed in, distant, and silent. I didnt have my papa to protect me and I didn't talk to him often and when I did, the last thing I wanted was to bother him. I was so fearful of troubling him or getting into trouble for even saying anything. A few months from my 13th birthday, my brother surprised me with a laptop. I was so happy I remember that being the best day ever because now I had something to take up my time and something to make me forget of my sister in law. Then within those few months I met him.

I found Sasuke in a chatroom on a random roleplay site I was obsessed with. I had discovered this new love for writing, only because I really loved writing in the diary that was ALWAYS invaded by my sister in law. Now that I had a laptop, I came up with the idea of making all my entries on my laptop with the security that no one would read it. I ended up seeing this newly found love for telling my stories and there I was, exploring the roleplay world and he was one of the first people to come in my life and expand my knowledge about such things. I don't know how to explain him when he first met. He was amazing. Kind, loving, flirtatious as all hell, oh my lord. We ended up talking more and more then when I told him I wanted to get better at writing, he became my sensei. He taught me everything there was about writing. It astounded me that you can make a paragraph or more out of one sentence just by rewording and adding things. Descriptive writing is my absolute favorite. He taught me everything about being descriptive even though I wasn't at all good with grammar and such. After much progressed I went from an amateur to a pro, aside from my spelling and grammatically incorrect tendencies.

I cant explain enough how grateful I am to him. I told him everything about me and he told me everything about him and when we skyped through phone calls they would last hours and when we decided to cam, our conversations and calls were endless. Being pre-teens back then wasn't at all like how it is now. Our conversations were always about anime, roleplaying, video games, books, what we did, laughing about nonsense, talking about other people in our circle of roleplaying friends. On weekends we would sleep with the camera on and wake up the next day and continue to talk throughout the day. He kept me sane, when we weren't talking and I was dealing with the Lady Devil, it was more bearable. When I was too scared to tell family about my feelings he listened and we made fun of her together.

When there is pre-teens, there is puberty then high school. That's when things got messed up. Our hormones and changes in our moods and such made things difficult. I felt weird feelings for him and he I. We got more intimate and then of course with that comes the insecure arguments of who's talking to who, who's cheating on who when neither of us were cheating at all Zavier came in shortly after and that made things worse because Sasuke would get insecure about this random, dominate male hanging around me so much. We were on an off all throughout high school together till i turned 17 when he said it was done. He was done. He told me we obviously weren't meant to be a couple and he loved me more than anything but in more of a sister way. I died inside...I loved this man and he was just so blunt. Of course I agreed but he ended up getting other girlfriends, bringing em around the chat rooms we would go in and I found myself continuously jealous and annoyed. We must have stopped talking a million and one times but we never could stay mad at each other.

Over time we just grew up. I got over him and my brother had left his evil wife I was in medical school and he was doing whatever he wanted. Both of us were older now, trying to figure out adult life. We would talk a little here in there, Hi's and How are you's, but then it would be a month or so till the next time we seriously sat down and would talk again for a couple hours I would notice though, that his attitude changed slightly. He was more short and to the point. After we would get back to our daily lives. He ended up getting engaged to a beautiful woman and they have a house. I didn't want to bother him so we just stopped talking. Later on his fiancee reached out to me and informed me of his poor health. He didn't wanna worry me with any of it but she decided on telling me anyway since he was in and out of the hospital for going on a year now. I felt my heart drop at her confession. A year. I remember repeating it to her. A whole year he had been in and out of the e.r and I wasn't told nothing. I had noticed his major attitude change but he always said he was tired or exhausted so I had figured it was due to a job of some sort but I was dead wrong. She sent me pictures of him in the hospital and I felt so guilty. I started talking to him more and more I bugged him everyday almost to where he told me to stop worrying. He said

"This is why I didn't want you to know. You always make big deals out of little things" He grumbled on camera.

"It isn't little when you're on a stretcher Sasuke!" I argued. I got to rub it in his face though. A few moths before I met Ichigo I got into a serious car accident. I was paralyzed from the waist down for a good while but was lucky enough to get feeling back in my legs later on after therapy. He ended up being the one that called and skyped everyday.

Back to real time, It was but a month ago when I got the news that Sasuke had gone back to the hospital. He had flatlined twice but made it out. I was lucky enough to be on skype with his fiancee most of the time. When he made a full recovery I was more than happy and all he said was;

"Stop worrying"

..

I smiled softly and nodded up at Kagome.

"Better." I replied. "Not fixed but he isn't dead so..."

"Still a bitter ass?" She smiled. I laughed and nodded.

"Wouldn't be Sasuke if he wasn't" I looked at my phone as it went off.

-Sasuke: Well?-

He had texted me and I laughed shaking my head with a mumble "Speak of the devil" I said. Kagome jumped up, snatched the phone and sent a video that was of her flipping him off and wishing him well. I had never seen her act more kinder to him and he to her.

I would be nothing without them