A/N: Thank you for all the reviews and welcome to all the new readers!
The next update is almost ready as soon as I get the blow out with Elena figured out properly.
Important: I do not own the Fifty Shades Trilogy or the characters. They belong to the very talented E.L. James.
Ana POV:
Last night is most certainly not a night I would ever like to have over. It is right up there with last Monday in Georgia. What is it with Mondays lately? I struggled to start my day properly and just when I was starting to get into work, it was lunch time and Tony came in to bring me my lunch prepared by Gail and brought to the office by Sawyer. This is ridiculous actually, but I'm in such a depressing mood that I will let it go for now. I'm not going to get into it with Tony and definitely not with Christian. It's bad enough having my every need met at Escala, I do not need it at the office, even if it now is the life I've chosen to have with Christian. My phone ringing offers a welcome distraction until I see it's Kate. She is still on the break up with Christian team and I do not want to continue having the same discussion over the phone every day.
"Hey, Kate. Still enjoying your holiday?" I ask cheerfully and take a deep breath when she does the same.
"Hey, Ana. Yes, the holiday is very nice, especially since my parents left. I just called to find out how the new job is going. Are you enjoying it?"
"It's exactly what I wanted to do. Oh and you should meet my assistant, Tony. He is a blast…"
"You have an assistant?" She asks shocked and yes, that was my reaction as well.
"Yes, he has been working here for a while and Grace made him my assistant when I accepted her offer. But he is really nice and…" I tell her when she yet again interrupts me.
"A man? As an assistant?"
"Well, yes, but he is gay." I say feeling guilty that that somehow makes it acceptable. Men should have any career just like women should.
"That figures. So listen, what's going on with you and Mr. Moneybags?" And there it is, the real reason for the call. Might as well get this over with and by the time she gets back it will be a non-issue.
"We are good. We're in love and…I've moved in with him." I say the last part very softly, but she heard me just fine.
"You moved in with him? Ana, are you insane? He broke your heart last week and a week later you move in with him?" I hear Elliot say something in the back ground. "Shut up Elliot. This is not good news." Then back to me again. "Ana, I love you and that is where I'm coming from on this, but Christian is not good for you. I wanted to kill him when I saw the picture of you leaving the hotel. I've never seen you like that. And the naked woman, fuck Ana, where there is smoke there is bound to be a fire. I was all for a fling for you with him, but not a serious relationship. He is not boyfriend material. You should break up with the man, not move in with him."
"Kate, stay out of it. It has nothing to do with you." Elliot shouts again in the back ground. Seems they have discussed it between them already.
"It's my best friend and therefore has everything to do with me." And then back to me again. "Ana,"
"No Kate. Elliot is right. I love you, but this is between Christian and me. I'm not leaving him and we are happy right now. I don't want to do anything to ruin what we have and you will have to accept him as part of my life. I love him, Kate."
"You love him? You've known him for a month, Ana. It's not love, its sex cravings. There are a lot of men in Seattle that know how to fuck a woman." Yes, she would know.
"Kate that is enough. I will not listen to you trying to get me to leave Christian. What is your problem with him? The issue of last week has been dealt with, in detail." I frown remembering last night's conversation with Ray again. "Enjoy the last couple of days with Elliot and come back happy for me. I don't want this to come between us, but I'm not choosing between you and Christian." I tell her sternly and rub my forehead with my free hand.
"I will go now, Ana, but I'm not sitting back and watching you get your heart broken by this ass again. We will discuss this when I get back." Elliot is well and truly pissed in the back ground and I hear him on the other end of the phone.
"Ana, go and be happy with my brother. He is a good man and I know he really does love you. Don't listen to Kate. Bye." And then he disconnects the call.
Kate is not going to let this go and I don't want to keep fighting about this. I can hear that this topic is already starting to affect her relationship with Elliot and that is not something I wanted. Elliot will not allow her to talk badly about his brother and I won't allow it either. She will just have to come around.
"Tea, madam." I open my eyes to see Tony put another cup of tea on my desk. "And two Advil's." I open my hand and take it gratefully. My head is starting to hurt and I'm not going to argue right now. "Want to talk about it?"
I think about it for a moment before swallowing the pills and shaking my head. I want to talk to someone and even though I really like him, I've only known him for a day, so not right now.
"Thank you, Tony, but I will be fine. Kate is just being Kate and driving me insane. I'm grateful for the fact that I have not dated much in college if this is how she would have been."
When he leaves, I take my phone and text the one person sure to cheer me up.
'I love you.'
'I love you too. What's wrong?' Is his immediate reply.
'Nothing, just wanted to tell you.'
'You've just made my shitty day a lot better, baby. I also love waking up next to you.'
'Yes, moving in with you have a lot of advantages. Although I think you're utility bill is going to go up with the long showers.' And I can't help but smile thinking about those long showers. Very fulfilling and very satisfying, long showers.
Just like that, my mood has improved and I go about the rest of the day. When a young mother comes in with a small baby, I can see immediately the prints her husband left on her. She just stopped by for advice and like any other decent person on the planet would tell her, I spent the better part of the afternoon telling her that no man has the right to treat a woman like this. Assault is assault and the fact that he was drunk and not himself is absolutely no excuse. The fact that he made her breakfast to apologize does not excuse his behaviour and then I tell her to come to me the next time he use her for a punching bag. I'm tempted to use my new found power and send Sawyer over there to level the odds a bit and see if he still stands afterwards, but alas, I can't do that. The only one that can stop him, is Maria herself. The small baby is apparently the cause of this change in him as he says the baby's screaming is causing him to not get a good night's sleep. If he didn't want kids, he should have used protection for pete's sake.
By the time Maria leaves, it's time to go home. After a quick text to Gail not to make dinner, I ask Sawyer to stop at the market in order for me to get the ingredients I need. I'm sure most of it will be in our well stocked kitchen, but since I'm yet to even open a cupboard, I'm not sure. I will have to get more involved since I now live there as I simply refuse the live the life of the rich and famous and not lift a finger to help.
I did however draw the line at Gail washing my underwear. It is lace and has to be hand washed and no way in hell will I expect her to wash my underwear with her hands. So every night I take my underwear and wash it in the bathroom and hang it over the shower door to dry. In the morning, I take it down for five minutes in the drier before putting it back in the drawers. Christian of course finds this whole routine entertaining and says the underwear in the bathroom is another reminder for him that I am indeed living there, as if all the other small things around the apartment is not real enough for him.
When I get home I put the ingredients on the kitchen counter and then go to get changed into jeans and a loose fitting t-shirt. I get back to the kitchen to find all the ingredients unpacked, vegetables washed and ready to be cut with a hot cup of tea waiting for me. Okay, having Gail is indeed very, very nice.
"Thank you, Gail. This is very sweet of you." I tell her and start to cut the onions and peppers how I want them. Gail goes around the counter to sit on the barstool on the other side.
"Making stir fry?"
"Yes. Sweet and sour chicken stir fry with basmati rice. I bought enough to make some for you and the guys too. No use both of us cooking dinner. That is if you don't mind." I add quickly.
"Thank you, Ana, but you know I really don't mind cooking. You should not come home after a long day at the office just to stand in the kitchen and make dinner."
"My mother did it and I'm used to going to class all day and then come home to make dinner for me and my friends. I find it relaxing."
"Okay, I make you a deal. You make dinner and I will quickly make a cheese cake for dessert." I've heard about her cheese cake and will definitely not decline such a tempting offer.
"You've got a deal."
And then the two of us start preparing dinner and dessert for tonight. I hope Christian is in the mood, or even has time, for a nice TV dinner just to relax. I need some normality and dinner in front of the TV is my idea of normal and relaxed. When dinner is done and the cheese cake in the fridge, we sit down with a glass of still detox water she made for me with cucumber, mint leaves and lemon pieces in. It is refreshing and very tasting. I found the recipe on the internet when I was searching for a new detox water and I gave it to her last night while Ray spoke with Christian in private.
Since it's getting late, Gail took her and Luke's food to their dining room. While I wait for Christian, my phone rings and I answer it without checking, sure that it is him to let me know what time to expect him. He might be a gentleman, but he has something to learn about courtesy…which he will learn tonight if he does not get home soon.
"Hello."
"Hello Ana, its Elena." Not Christian, but I welcome the company, even if it is over the phone.
"Hey Elena, how are you?" I feel horrible for not getting in touch with her sooner. She phoned while Christian and I were broken up, but I ignored the call both times.
"I'm…I'm actually doing better than I have in years. John's been great and we started focussed therapy. You know, where you decide what you want out of life and how to get there?"
"Yes, I know. It's shown great results in patients who really want to achieve their goals." I tell her, even though I think the question were rhetorical.
"Oh yes, of course you would know. Anyway, I've made a list of what I really want out of life and John is helping me to get there. It will take some time obviously, but I really want a better life and decided that I really want to achieve those objectives. We are working through what happened and if I had known what the true benefit of therapy would be, I would have made more of an effort when I was younger." She honestly does not even sound like the Elena I met weeks ago.
"If you don't mind me asking, Elena, what do you want?"
"To be happy. To make a real difference in other people's life. To try and make up for all that I did wrong. To stop living with regret and anger. To forgive those who wronged me and to earn forgiveness from those who I wronged." My first thought is naturally the young boy she told me about. The one she beat because of what another young boy has done to her.
"Earning forgiveness is not always easy, Elena. I hope you get that." I tell her honestly.
"I know. I hope so too." Shit, she sounded so positive earlier and I now took that away. "Enough about me, tell me how you are doing. I heard what happened last week and tried to call you. I understand why you didn't want to take my calls, but I was really worried about you."
"I'm sorry for not answering. If it makes you feel any better, I didn't answer anyone's calls. I just needed time to work everything out on my own. I was so angry and hurt and it was easier for me not to talk about it too."
"Christian told me what happened and I swear if I had half the strength he has, I would have punched sense into him. What he was thinking, I don't know." Then she stops when I want her to continue. He obviously spoke to her during the time we were apart and it makes sense since I discussed it with my friends as well. But she soon continues, "He was devastated, Ana. I've never seen him like that. And that girl can be glad he didn't get his hands on her last week. With the amount of anger towards her and towards himself he kept building up, he was sure to do some permanent or fatal damage."
"He brought it on himself." Yes, I'm still not totally over the whole thing and still hold him responsible for my misery. "I forgave him soon afterwards, but forgetting it is an entire different matter. I know that one should forgive and forget and I'm trying, but at times, I still think back and I get angry all over again. It was all so unnecessary and the fact that he made the conscious decision to hurt me, well…as I said, I'm trying."
"He loves you. Just remember that and you will be fine, Ana. Some people don't get your kind of love in a lifetime and you got it the first time." I frown and look at the phone to make sure it is indeed the right Elena on the other side.
"Well, seems you are coming around, Elena. I would never have expected those words coming from you."
"Don't tell anyone else, you will ruin my reputation." She laughs and it sounds wonderful to hear a genuine laugh from her. I wish I could see her face right now.
"Your secret is safe with me. I'm glad you are doing better, Elena. We should get together soon."
"We should. I actually want to discuss something with you, but will set something up as it would be better to sit down and discuss it in detail. I will give you a call at the office and set something up."
After a quick goodbye, I turn around and there he is…finally. Although his eyes soften when he looks into my eyes, I can tell something is off. Oh shit, I wonder how long he has been standing there. Even his smile does not reach his eyes.
He puts down his briefcase behind one of the barstools before he removes his jacket and tie and put it over the back of it. I of course are rooted on the spot. Partially because I like to see him like this, especially with the top buttons of his shirt undone. On the other hand is my fear that he heard more that I would have wanted him to.
"Hello, Anastasia." He says slowly, confirming that he did indeed hear more than only the last part of my conversation with Elena.
"Hello." I walk over to him and put my arms around his neck.
He grabs me by my waist but does not pull me closer. After taking a deep breath in my hair, he pulls away and then give me a kiss. It was strange at first, a bit stiff, but then he relaxes and when his arms circles my waist, I let go. I didn't want him to hear what I said and with this kiss, I'm trying to apologize without words. His kiss is filled with regret and it makes me feel so much worse. He apologized so many times already and I hate that I can't just forget it.
He bends down and picks me up. I wrap my legs around him as he carries me to the couch. He sits down with me on his lap before he pulls away to look at me. When he doesn't say anything, I decide to start with a normal conversation to postpone the conversation I know is coming.
"How was your day?" Yes, that sounds normal enough.
"Stressful. Everything just seems to go on forever. I was trying again, unsuccessfully I might add, to get the deals with Europe and Tokyo to a point where we can start discussing my offer when your text came through. It made the rest of my day a lot more tolerable." And then he runs both hands through his hair. Maybe his shitty day is the cause for his strange mood. "How was your day?"
"Not as bad as yours, but your text also made me feel a lot better." He frowns and even though I decided not to tell him, I want to be open with him. "Kate called and she is not happy about me moving in with you. From what I could figure out, Kate and Elliot also had words about it before she called me and they were continuing the argument with me on the phone with Kate. It ended with Elliot taking the phone from Kate to end the conversation. I've never seen her act like this and if I'm honest, I don't like Kate like this." He nods, but says nothing for a couple of seconds before taking a deep breath.
"Soooo…Elena called?" Does he always have to handle everything head on? I would have been happy to avoid this conversation for a couple of days or better yet, pretend he didn't hear anything and just carry on. But typical Christian, he wants to discuss it.
"Yes." I know he wanted me to say more, but I'm sure as hell not offering any information.
"Did she say anything interesting?"
"She's still going to therapy and it seems to be helping."
"Anything else?"
"She wants to meet with me to discuss something, but will phone at the office to set something up."
"Are we really going to play twenty questions?" He asks with raised eyebrows and I decide to rather play dumb.
"Why don't you ask me exactly what you want to know?" Even though I know very well what that is, I can't be absolutely sure and will rather wait for confirmation.
"I think it will be better if I tell you at what part of the conversation I walked in on." I simply nod. "He brought it on himself." He quotes me and yes, this is indeed the reason for his strange mood.
"I'm sorry you heard that."
"I'm not. You said something similar in you sleep this morning and I was actually hoping you would say it to me when you are awake so that we can discuss how you are feeling."
"What did I say?" And why do I have to be one of those people who talks in their sleep?
"I woke up and pulled you close to me. After I told you I love you, you said that you wish I never broke your heart. It wasn't what I was expecting to hear." I look down at his chest, thinking of a response when he puts a finger under my chin to lift my head again. "Is that how you feel?"
"Yes, but what's done is done and I will just have to work this out on my own." I tell him honestly, eyes filled with regret over the words he heard this morning and earlier.
"I don't want to lose you, baby. How can I help to make this better?"
"Just love me." I say before falling forward without thinking about the pain it is sure to be causing him with the pressure on his chest.
"That I can do, baby. That I can do." He says softly while stoking my hair, making me feel so much better already.
After about half an hour of just sitting there in silence, I remember dinner and my plans for this evening.
"What would you say to a nice relaxing dinner in front of the TV with me?" I ask, my head still on his shoulder. "That is if you don't have work to do."
"I've never had dinner in front of the TV before. Why don't you get dinner and I will get changed and meet you in the media room?"
I get back up and look him straight in the eye, "No matter what I say in my sleep, I love you and I will never leave you again."
"That makes me really happy."
Christian POV:
I'm sitting in this boring as fuck weekly management meeting and I really don't want to be here. These idiots are not telling me anything I don't already know and not for the first time I wish someone would tell me something new, something interesting.
After coming home last night to hear Ana say those words to Elena, I thought for sure that my happy days were indeed numbered. As she continued her conversation, all I heard were her words, over and over again. "I know that one should forgive and forget and I'm trying. It was all so unnecessary and the fact that he made the conscious decision to hurt me." It confirmed my fears of the entire day after she said that she wished I never broke her heart. I stood there, trying to figure out why she is staying with me if that was how she felt.
But for once in my life I had an honest conversation with someone and it paid off. She said she would never leave me and I believe her. She loves me and she is staying. The relaxing TV dinner, which I never thought I would have, was the perfect ending to a very anxious day. Made even more perfect with us making love and falling asleep in each other's arms.
I would never be able to go back to who I was before or how my life was before Ana. To think that it was only a month ago blows my mind, but I guess that is what love does to you. It is what love did to me. She broke me down and then built me back up into a better person. A person deserving of her love. At the very least, trying to be.
She says that she will work her feelings out on her own and all I can do to help is love her, but I want to do so much more. I want to show her how much I love her, but I don't know how.
Three meetings and two security briefings later, I'm still trying to figure out how to show Ana how much I love her. Deep down I know, but shit, that is the scariest fucking solution ever. I don't want to try it just to fail and make her feel even worse. I don't want to set us back further than I have already. Why can't I just be normal? And yes, why can't I just be more like Elliot?
"Mr. Grey?" I hear Andrea's voice over the intercom.
"Yes, Andrea."
"Mrs. Grey called to ask me to remind you about dinner tonight at seven." Oh yes, that did slip my mind.
"Thank you, Andrea."
"Do you want me to call Ms. Steele's assistant to remind her as well?"
"No, thank you. I will do that myself."
I take my phone and send a text to Ana.
"Dinner at seven at my parents. Still up for it?"
"Of course. Grace stopped by this morning to remind me. Ana x." Ana x? What the hell is Ana x?
"Ana x?"
"Ana kiss." Did I mention I love this woman?
"x"
I'm still staring at our conversation when my phone rings and I see Elliot's name. He has been looking for me since yesterday and I'm guessing it has something to do with his bitchy girlfriend.
"Hello Elliot. Please do not ruin my day."
"Now why would I do that? And why are you ignoring me?" He asks and there is noise around him which was not in the back ground when I spoke to him two days ago.
"I'm not ignoring you, I'm avoiding you. There is a difference." More like avoiding hearing about Kate.
"I understand why. Fuck bro, she is a woman on a mission and I just can't get through to her. I've tried everything and just gave up. I don't understand why she has to be such a bitch about this. I get the whole friends like sisters thing, but shit, this is taking it too far. Did Ana tell you they even had a fight about you?" Kate's clever, I'll give her that. She knows there is still tension with Ana feeling the way she is and she is trying to cause more tension in a hope to break us up.
"She did and Elliot, I know she is your girlfriend and all, but I will take her down before I give Ana up. If she is looking for a fight, she should be warned that I'm not someone to fuck with and don't do anything half assed. What she will be getting is a war and I don't lose. Not even her father will be able to protect her when I'm done with her. If she is wise, she should stay clear of me and stop telling Ana to leave me." I tell him, my voice hard and cold and as serious as I've ever been.
"I already warned her, but she is refusing to listen to me. She keeps saying that I don't know who you really are and what you are capable off." What the fuck? "I told her that well…for the first time I don't only love my brother, but I like him. I like who you've become since Ana came into your life and I will move heaven and earth to keep you together. Since we want different things, obviously, I dumped her. I can't be with someone who's actively trying to hurt my family. A family that is just starting to come together." I think this is the first time ever I've heard him be so serious.
"You didn't have to do that, Elliot, but I can understand how this could complicate your relationship. I'm terribly sorry that you've had to make that decision." I run my hands through my hair, hating what this fucking bitch is doing, or trying to do, to my family. "Where are you?"
"On my way back."
"I'm going to Bellevue, meet me there."
I end the call, thinking about what he has said. "She keeps saying that I don't know who you really are and what you are capable off." What the fuck does she know and how?
"Andrea, get Welch and Taylor up here immediately." I tell her and stand to go look out the window.
This just gets more complicated by the day and I wish I could take Ana away from it all. Just the two of us. Maybe Africa since she wants to go there. I turn to face Taylor and Welch as they enter my office and indicate for them to take a seat.
"I think we might just have another problem. Kathrine Kavanagh."
"What seems to be the problem?" Taylor is immediately on high alert, trying to work out for himself what the problem is. He is good at observing people and I now regret not having Taylor spend more time with us before Kate left.
"She is trying to convince Ms. Steele to leave me. That in itself would not be cause for concern, but it's what she said to my brother, before he dumped her, that is concerning. She told him that he don't know who I really am and what I'm capable off. It might be nothing, but my gut is telling me this woman knows something and I want to know how."
"I think we should run a thorough back ground check on her and all of her family and associates. It might take the rest of the day and I can try and have it to you by tomorrow, Sir." Welch already starts typing away on his phone and Taylor on his.
"What's your thoughts?"
"Sir, I can assure you that we have not been hacked, by anyone. If she knows something, she knows someone who knows something and we know everything of anyone who knows anything about you." Taylor is still typing away on his cellphone.
"Taylor, what are you doing?"
"I got another CPO for Ms. Steele, covert, she will not make contact. Ms. Kavanagh's photo was sent to the security at Ms. Steele's office and since right of admission is reserved and you are the owner, Ms. Kavanagh will not be granted access until we know what we are dealing with. The Escala access codes were changed, you will find the new codes on your cellphone." Seriously, that is some impressive shit right there and another example of his efficiency. But Escala? "In case Mr. Grey gave her the codes for some reason. Just doting all i's and crossing all t's, Sir."
"Thank you, Taylor. I do not, under any circumstances, want Ms. Steele to be made aware of any of this. Once Kate has been cleared and I've had a chance to talk to her, we will remove the measures, but until then, keep her the hell away from us. Elliot will meet me at Bellevue as he is on his way back, I will try and get more information from him. Welch, I want those back ground checks tomorrow morning if not sooner. We will be perfectly safe at Bellevue with my parent's security, so Taylor and Sawyer can help you." Taylor wants to protest, but wisely decides not to.
"Sir, until we know what is going on, please can I ask that both you and Ms. Steele stay inside the house and away from the water? We now have multiple threats against you, Ms. Williams is still MIA and now Ms. Kavanagh appears to know more than she should."
"On second thoughts, get Ryan or Reynolds to stay with my parent's security at the gate. I will contact him if needed. I'm not willing to take any chances with Ms. Steele with me."
A/N: Yes, please review.