A/N: This is to my buddy Gabby who so 'kindly' pushed me for this chapter. XD
Chapter 23: A Reason to Stay1
"V-Verona?" Felix paled as he thought of it.
They all stood frozen, Luna's finger still pointed accusingly at the demon, having been revealed that they were all aware of Ciel's contract with Sebastian, though the details were still sketchy considering that all the information came from Felix's dreams which were becoming less and less frequent, but…he truthfully hadn't been getting his 'required' amount of sleep. Insomniac's habits…
"Whoa, aren't you jerking this a bit far L?" Hespera sweated nervously.
Though her sisters seemed to disapprove of their relationship, she really saw no immense harm in it, as long as the demon didn't try anything funny. But from what she's seen of the Phantomhive boy, Ciel would never allow such a thing in fear of Kurt being hurt. These were sensitive relationships that were forming, she was aware of the trials and errors both couplets would make, but that would fortify their bonds and give Felix the support he needed to finally reveal himself.
"I am not!" Luna hissed, "Aren't you worried for him?"
"In truth I am not…" Hespera said, she wasn't the type to lie it seemed, "He's not a teenager anymore, it's time we started letting him make his own decisions."
"Like sending him into the hands of this beast's claws to be torn apart and ripped to shreds?" Luna hissed, "Leaving himself bleeding on the ground like crow-food and Kurt is left out to dry, like a cloth wrung by the hands of Phantomhive."
"I warn you not to spite my master's name so precariously." Sebastian hissed, his eyes glowing.
"I warn you not to assume that Felix is yours so eagerly." Luna hissed back.
Sol sighed and lowered Luna's arm, "Now now, I do believe H to be right in this case. Felix should be making his own choices."
Felix sighed in relief.
"However…" Sol began again, making his heart jump as she turned her pink eyes on his.
"If you find no reason to stay, then I think it is best to leave the Phantomhive Estate." Sol completed.
While you still can…She added on without saying it out loud. After all, it was implied.
"What about Kurt?" Felix offered.
"He could easily be brought along with us, I'm sure he would enjoy the hillsides of Italy." Luna waved it off.
"Who would help Michael?"
"Who is helping him now?" Hespera raised an eyebrow, really he was terrible at this.
"We are not looking for excuses, with nothing to follow them up." Sol sighed, "A reason that you should be here. What goal are you trying to accomplish by staying here? What have you been trying to accomplish? You have time, we'll be staying here for as long as Prince Soma and Sir Agni remain here, during that time you can offer a reason or choose to leave."
"…Alright then." Felix bowed slightly, "I will provide a reason to stay."
"Or you will decide to leave," Luna hissed, "I'll be here to persuade you."
"L…" Sol scolded, "Perhaps it's best we go to bed."
Luna grumbled something incoherently and stomped off with Sol behind her, throwing a serious gaze towards Felix, showing her that she would swing either way depending on what he chose. Hespera stayed behind after her sister's departure, standing up and walking over to Sebastian.
"My lady?" Felix called to her questioningly.
In a split second she had a knife to Sebastian's throat, surprising the demon in question with her speed and the strength in which she pressed the blade into his skin. It was shocking to think that such a human existed with such inhuman abilities, though Agni also disproved this thought.
Slicing his throat, just enough to see a drop of blood she released him and passed the knife to Felix, who fumbled with it slightly before swiping it with his shirt, ignoring his shaking hands. He never thought he'd live to see Sebastian's blood. His hands stopped shaking at the thought; Sebastian bled, just like any other man.
Hespera turned to him with a slight smile and she patted Sebastian's chest with a comforting firmness.
"Thank you for the demonstration Sebastian, it was most needed and will turn in your favor."
For once in his life, Sebastian found himself slightly confused, but pushed it off as a legitimate threat against him, warning him that she could kill him at anytime; at any point were he to harm Felix she would kill him without a second thought.
"I'll be taking my leave now, I trust Felix to find a good enough reason to stay." She smiled at her brother of different blood, and caressed his cheek with one hand while ruffling his hair with the other.
"You're still so shut in my brother, I wish to see the day where I can look into your eyes and know in truth that who I'm looking at is the real you." She sighed and her eyes darted sadly between the two golden irises, "Slowly but surely your gates are opening, and I couldn't watch them close again. Find the reason to stay Felix, if not for you, do it for me."
"I'll try…" Felix promised, his eyes darting to Sebastian's curious gaze for a second.
She smiled and nodded to Sebastian before walking away.
"Well she's quite the interesting person…" Sebastian commented, just as Hespera's head popped back in.
"Oh yes!" She added, "Sebastian, S may or may not have worn a few deep circles into the carpet, so you might want to take care of those. L also managed to rip the curtains in the hallway mid-rampage, so be a dear and have Felix tend to those. He's a magnificent at sewing."
"Is he now?" Sebastian smirked.
"Yes, I am in fact." Felix huffed and kept his head high, "With a master like Kurt I have to have many skills that ignorant demons might find effeminate."
"Oh I'm sure that I'm not the only one Mr. Nhell…" Sebastian replied in amusement.
"Bastard…" Felix murmured to himself, not that Sebastian caught that statement at all.
"I dare say you're the first human with the gall to address me in such a way."
"I dare say you don't know half of the things I plan to address you as from now on." Felix retorted, "Bastard."
Sebastian chuckled, "It's probably best to get your required sleep, right darling?"
Felix jumped out of his skin at the new pet name. He turned around to Sebastian with frightened eyes.
"No…" He stated with wide eyes, "You're not going to-"
"Ah, look at the time," Sebastian sighed, "I must tend to my master now."
"Sebastian!" Felix growled.
"Goodnight darling." He smirked as he exited, "Sleep well."
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Felix sighed as he felt the pillow beneath his head, he had gotten used to the soft bedding so unlike the cold floors of his factory. Michael had written him, asking how he was and telling him that he shouldn't be a lazy prat like he was at the printing press, though they both knew that wasn't true. His mind drifted to what Hespera had said, her eyes sad…so sad.
Cain…open the gate more Cain. The voices returned and Felix clutched his head, trying to get them out.
"Go away!" He hissed.
I can't go away. The voice replied, For I am you.
"My name is Felix Nhell."
Come now, we both know that isn't true. The voice scoffed and seemed to pry at his brain, You remember it, but only locked it away. What you wish to forget can never truly be forgotten.
"If I locked it away, it must be bad enough that I don't want to remember it."
Then let's discuss the problem at hand then, you obviously want to stay here, yet you cannot find the reason why.
"A reason for leaving this place is because I'm hearing voices," Felix huffed, "Look at me, having a conversation with myself. I'm going nuts."
You're not crazy, well…not in that way I suppose, but falling for a demon of all things is certainly in the classification of insane activities.
"I am not falling for that bastard, I'm a man anyway." Felix hissed, "You know what? I'm just going to ignore you until you go away."
You mean until yougo away?
"…"
You cannot ignore me forever! I am you! You cannot deny this for much longer, I'm sure you can hear them as well. Your screams from the past coming back to haunt you like the devil haunts the earth. A man, such a thing as gender didn't stop you as an adolescent now did it?
"How the hell-?"
I know everything you've done, because it's exactly as I have done. I even know what you have locked away. Poor little Cain, drenched in the blood of your own kin. Soaking into your clothes, your skin, your hair turned an even darker red from the pouring liquid. The shine of metal, the sound of hacking human bones. One; CRRRACk! Two; CRRRACk! Three: CRRRACk!
"Stop it…just stop it. I was three when my parents disappeared and I was sent to an orphanage."
You were six when your parents were murdered and then after being questioned by Estonian police men you became mute and were sent to the Correctional Center for Orphaned Children-
"NO!" Felix shouted and the voice disappeared, as if thrown away by his demanding shriek.
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"Ciel?" Kurt cocked his head in confusion, "What are you doing out here?"
Ciel turned around, he wasn't surprised to see Kurt in his evening dress enter the garden where the young earl sat on the stone bench, mulling his thoughts out to the stone and sky. It was a clear night, but it was growing awfully cold. Snow still covered the ground and Kurt became worried when he saw Ciel wore no shoes. Kurt walked towards him, wrapping his own robe closer to his form.
"Ciel?" He hesitantly put a hand on his friend's shoulders, "Ciel?"
There was no response, only the light breeze as his blood began to freeze. Ciel turned his head towards Kurt, his eye patch on the ground getting covered by snowflakes. Kurt gasped as he saw Ciel's sapphire iris, cold and unwavering, and the other covered by cobalt blue tendrils significant only to the Phantomhives.
"Kurt…it's so cold out here. Should I be…alive?" Ciel asked in confusion.
"What do you mean? Of course you should be alive!" Kurt gave a weak laugh.
"I don't want to live Kurt, you can end that for me can't you?" Ciel suddenly grasped Kurt's wrists, "You can kill me can't you Kurt?"
"What are you saying?"
Suddenly Ciel's face was not his own, it twisted into the face of his mother, with her familiar silver tendrils blowing gently in the wind. Her icy eyes focused on Kurt's own emerald gaze, keeping him locked in pain and terror.
"Kill him Alexander!" The voice was that of his fathers, "Kill him like you did your own ill mother! Mother-murderer! Death searcher! Bringer of shame and hatred! You think he could like you? Who could like you when you're nothing more than a blood thirsty creature meant to reap souls?"
"N-No…" He felt the familiar blade in his hands once more, that overflow of power, he looked in terror at the shard-turned-scythe in his grasp, "NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!"
He swung not of his own accord and Ciel's bloody screams echoed through his skull.
"NOOOOOOOOO!" He screeched, then it all was gone in a flash.
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"Felix!" Kurt left his room, sniffling and calling his butler's name, "Felix!"
He wiped his eyes and flinched when he ran into a rather tall body. He looked up in embarrassment as he saw the thin black-haired woman from before, looking down at him in surprise and confusion.
"S-Sorry…" He hiccupped and was about to move past her when she knelt down and gripped his wrists.
"No need, what's with the waterworks?" She almost demanded out of him, when she received no response, she shook him lightly, "Well?"
"I-I had a nightmare..w-where I killed Ciel…" He sniffed again and Luna felt a twinge of pity towards the poor child. She sighed and wiped his tears with a handkerchief gently. Kurt was surprised that she had soft hands.
"They are only dreams…sometimes, our subconscious plays tricks on us." She tried to comfort, "They turn our fears into dreams, so that if we were to experience them in real life we will know how to handle them. So, would you kill Ciel Phantomhive if you had the choice to?"
"No, of course not!" Kurt retorted and she smiled. It was such a pretty smile that Kurt's tears stopped falling.
"Then there is nothing to fear is there?" She raised an eyebrow before sighing, "You know, Felix has nightmares too. He's lived them."
"He does? He has?"
She nodded, "When I first found Felix, he was selling old textbooks to people on the street, trying his best to survive after his mother's passing. I was going to pass him by, but something about him stopped me. Perhaps it was those striking gold eyes begging for help and looking so lost, like a child, or that red hair that reminded me of a clown. I asked him if he was illiterate, and when he said no, I offered him a position in the Choppy Enquirer."
Kurt's eyes widened, "You mean you all are-!"
"Hush, and yes." She smiled again and Kurt had to admit that he'd misjudged her, "Now then, I'm sure Felix would want you asleep no?"
He nodded and she turned him back the way he came.
"Then get to bed, Goodnight Kurt."
He nodded to her before going off to his chambers, preparing for the day tomorrow that was sure to be filled with excitement.
A/N: Luna's not so bad after all! ^-^ Okay, she's still a you-know-what, but she's a kind hearted you-know-what! This is the last chapter off of my laptop since I have to turn it in to the school this Wednesday, but I shall continue to the best of my abilities on my old Dell computer.