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29.

I'm sorry.

They were just two words—two simple little words made up of seven letters and coming from an unknown number. But Bella knew exactly who had sent them.

And what they meant.

Bella's first gut reaction to the message was to hit 'Delete' and act like they had never appeared but still, something was holding her back. So instead of making her problem go away, she decided to just pocket it for the time being as she and Alice stepped out of the subway.

"Is everything okay, Bella?" the ever perceptive Alice asked. The two of them were on their way to the Cullen's magnificent Fifth Avenue apartment for a night of being paid to lounge around, stuff their faces and chat about boys while some rom com played in the background. And all of that under the pretext of babysitting.

It had been a long time ago since Bella had let go of the idea that such a thing actually involved an active participation of the kids she was supposed to be taking care of.

Much to the relief of Jasper and Rose.

Bella nodded. "Just a message Edward sent me. I'll delete it later," she answered, quickly changing the subject before Alice could ask another question. "Do you think we should pop by Whole Foods to get some snacks?"

"I'm sure Esme keeps her kitchen well-stocked." Alice chuckled, though there was something in her friend's eyes that told Bella her lie hadn't been quite as effective as she'd hoped. "What do you say to the two of us getting a little more intel about what the wayward cousin's been up to lately?"

"Don't even think about it!" Bella hissed, her phone almost burning a hole in her pocket. "It's bad enough that last night happened; I'd like to not repeat that particular type of plane crash any time soon."

"Why are you calling it a plane crash?" Alice questioned, smiling widely at the door man as they entered the building. "You got what you wanted across and left him in no doubt about how badly he fucked up. I'd call that a resounding success."

"But I didn't even let the man speak!" Bella groaned, pushing the elevator button. "I bet he had an entirely different idea of what was going to happen when he walked into that coffee shop."

"True," Alice mused, "but does this necessarily have to be a bad starting ground?" Angling her head as she chose her words carefully, still feeling like she should push her friend to resolve the matter that had been weighing her down for as long as she'd known her. "Just think about it, Bella. Maybe meeting face to face isn't the best idea right now but he just opened up a new line of communication that's a lot safer for you."

"So you're saying I should message him back?" Bella squeaked, her throat constricting with thoughts of what the hell she was going to say.

"I think you should at least give it some thought," Alice nodded as the elevator doors opened to reveal a waiting Esme, dressed to the nines for a fabulous night on the town.

Over the months, Alice had become as welcome in their home as Bella was, sometimes during the week filling in when Bella had a study group or evening class and couldn't watch the kids. Where Bella was the go to person for Jasper and Rose to talk to and their ally in trying to escape the stiff mold their father as trying to push them into, Alice was the one who brought fun and lightheartedness into their lives.

And, of course, Jasper was completely and utterly smitten with her.

"I've set out some snacks on the kitchen counter," Esme explained while fastening her earrings. "Rose had a last-minute sleepover so she's staying the night at Lauren's but Jasper should be around here somewhere. Probably glued to a computer committing God knows what kind of acts of violence."

Alice chuckled. "I think I can hear the sounds of destruction coming from his room."

Sighing, Esme rolled her eyes. "If that boy would put as much focus in his schoolwork as he does in his computer games, he might even pass history this year! God knows the two of you have already worked wonders on his geography!"

Bella smiled proudly, knowing that all it had taken was some teamwork and persistence to get Jasper interested in topography when before he couldn't even be bothered to open his book. It had been Alice who'd suggested they base their teachings around all the famous surfing spots in the world and from that point on, the rest became a whole lot easier.

Bella had never known there were so many places you could surf.

"We'll be home around midnight, maybe a little later so I've got two of the guest bedrooms set up for you in case you get tired," Esme assured them as she joined her husband in the foyer. "I know that the chance of actually luring my son out of his room to socialize are slim to none but can the two of you at least make sure he goes to bed at a reasonable time."

"We'll do our best," Bella assured her as Carlisle helped his wife into her coat. "Have fun tonight!"

Carlisle chuckled as he guided his wife towards the apartment door, his hand on the small of her back as they looked every inch the successful couple they were. And even more so since that last summer.

What had happened that day, even though the event in itself hadn't exactly been unique, had really shaken up the way Carlisle lived his life. It was true that the demands of his work meant that he had to put in long hours but, since that day, he made an effort to come home every night before his kids were in bed and spend some time with them.

It had been awkward at first and his son was still fighting him tooth and nail but even when he was close to pulling his hair out, at the end of the day he knew what was going on in the lives of his kids. Or at least…he knew about as much as any parent did, which was a hell of a lot more than he did before.

"I'll go check on Jasper, okay?" Alice offered, grinning evilly. "You know…give you a little time to think about another member of the family?"

Bella stuck her tongue out at her but as soon as the evil little meddler had left, she did pull her phone from her pocket, her eyes zoning in on the unwittingly offensive message as her mind mulled on the next step.

Should she send a reply?

And what on earth should it be?

What do you want from me? – B

The message had been sent before Bella realized it but, while the action almost made her hyperventilate, the question it contained came from the deepest depth of her being.

The answer came so unexpectedly soon that she almost dropped her phone, her hand shaking as the screen lit up and words emerged.

What, kitten, no 'Who is this?'

She could feel her anger rise again at the lighthearted tone of his message but at the same time, it excited her. Just like everything about him had always thrilled her.

There aren't that many people out there who feel the need to apologize me. And don't call me kitten. – B

Her phone buzzed again almost immediately.

Again, I most humbly apologize. So what did you think about last night's show?

Bella sighed, the question more loaded than Edward had probably intended it to be.

Beautiful and awful at the same time. No offense. I'm probably not making any sense right now. It was just…overwhelming. – B

She was no longer surprised when his answer came before she'd even had time to put her phone down.

No, I understand completely. If I'd have known you were there, I probably would have chickened out and played some of my older stuff. Do you hate me for playing those songs?

Again, Bella sighed, sitting back as she thought about his question. Did she really hate him for playing them? Could she even blame him? No, not really. He was a songwriter and even though Bella knew next to nothing about song writing, she knew that people usually wrote about what they experienced.

And besides, she'd heard a lot of those songs in their crudest, purest form back at the beach house.

I don't hate you. Those songs are just as amazing as they were when I first heard them. It just came as a bit of a shock to hear them sung in front of a crowd. You're an amazing writer and an even better musician. – B

She sighed, the memory of those days still as painful as it had been the day it had happened.

They are only good because they were inspired by the real thing. I lied, Bella, but apart from that morning, I never lied to you.

Shaking her head, melancholy was replaced by anger again as she read his words.

But the lies you told that day really cut me deep. You hung me out to dry, denied what we had together and then left without as much as a goodbye. What else am I to do than resent you for it? – B

Her hands shook as hard as her phone when his reply came in.

I don't blame you. I was a liar and a coward back then and I regret every single step I took that drove me away from you. If I were to send you something, would you listen to it?

Songs.

He'd written songs about their separation. She knew it without even having to think about it. After all, if the feelings he'd had for her—however imagined they might have been on his part—had inspired him to write some of the sweetest love songs she'd ever heard, those moments of darkness and detox must have had triggered his creative side as well. After all, Edward wrote from the heart, whether it be in a light or heavy place.

And while part of her wanted to hear what words and melodies could capture the heartbreak she had felt and the things he went through in the wake of that fateful day, she knew it would be wrong.

No, I want to hear it from you. – B

She wanted to see his face when he spoke the words, read his eyes and scan them for truths and hidden meanings. He owed that to her.

Can you meet me at the Central Park bandstand at nine tomorrow morning?

She definitely could, but did she want to? Bella didn't have to think long to know what her answer was. Alice had been right, she owed it to herself to listen to him and find out why he'd done what he'd done.

Ok. – B

Again her hands were shaking as she typed out the message, her eagerness to see him again and excitement to be near him almost overriding the apprehension and resentment she felt towards him.

Will I be needing a first aid kit?

She had to laugh at that, even in spite of herself.

That depends on the amount of groveling you're willing to go to. Real groveling this time, not the kind of shit you think I want to hear or those awful justifications you came up with last night. – B

She put down her phone, then, determined not to look again as she heard Alice return to the living room. But as her friend cued up the movie they'd agreed to watch that night, Bella's phone buzzed with one final message and soon the urge to see what he had written became too strong.

I'll see you there, then. Without my first aid kit. Sweet dreams.

Thoughts?