Title: Remember Me

Word Count: 1,378

Characters: Clara Oswald ft. The 11th Doctor

Summary: Clara's thoughts when jumping into the Doctor's time stream.

Rating: K+

Song Lyrics: 'The Only Hope For Me Is You', by My Chemical Romance

Remember me

Where, where will we stand
When all the lights go out across these city streets?
Where were you when all of the embers fell?
I still remember them

Covered in ash
Covered in glass
Covered in all my friends
I still think of the bombs they built

The concept of death always seemed a bit boring to Clara Oswald.

It wasn't that she wasn't scared of dying, at times she was absolutely mortified of it, but she thought dying was pointless. What is the point of living if you just end up six feet under the ground when you're too weak to do anything anymore?

She wasn't afraid of her own death so much so as her friend's deaths. She was scared that she wouldn't be able to handle the grief of losing someone close to her; she had a lot of trouble coping with her mother's tragic and saddening death and didn't think she would be able to possibly survive another.

It's always hard, losing someone, and she supposed, that she would much rather someone lose her than be the one that was losing someone. (Honestly, she would have preferred to keep everything that ever existed, but sadly life never seemed to work out that way.) So when the Doctor was being ripped apart by a being that shouldn't be from inside his time stream, it really wasn't a question to her; she was going to save him, because god knows she wouldn't be able to live without him.

She knew long before River Song told her that she wouldn't get out of this alive – but she was going to save the doctor, and that's all the mattered to her. She wasn't scared of dying, and she didn't see what all the buzz was about. She felt so alive, so full of adrenaline when she heard him call out for her to stop – told her to stay here, with him. She turned to look to look at him with a sad excited smile. She didn't mean to say anything to him before she died – she really wanted to remain mysterious, but it just slipped out and she wasn't really sure why, but it sounded like a good way to go out.

Run, run you clever boy, and remember.

And then she jumped. At first everything felt normal, then it got so hot that it felt cold and she was screaming because it felt like she was being ripped apart into millions of pieces all at once and there wasn't a thing she could do about it. Then she started falling, and it felt like it was in slow motion. She felt like she was going to be sick. She didn't remember why she thought this was going to be a good idea.

But she remembered; in the end she always remembered. She is Clara Oswald – she is living a thousand lives and dying a thousand times over and over again because she can't stand to see the universe without her wonderful mad man. It's a never ending cycle; she's born. She lives and she dies, and it hurts. It mental anguish is more painful than the icy fire running through her veins.

He never notices her, never ever- not in all of time and space. Until Oswin Oswald and Clara Oswin Oswald. All these people, all these echoes of herself, they are fragments of who she is, and if the Doctor claims to see wonderful things n her, she starts to think that he was lying about her, lying about her being impossible. But she soon forgets that thought because she's finished falling and hits the ground with a thud and screams.

I don't know where I am.

I DON'T KNOW WHERE I AM!

Doctor! Doctor!

She doesn't know who she is or what she was but all she knows is that was born to save the Doctor, and that job will never be over. He isn't coming for her because he never sees her and she doubts that he ever will because who pays attention to repeating sounds –to echoes? Usually people just try to tune them out.

She smashes her fists on the ground in frustration because there are so many things running through her mind that she can't process anything or remember who she is and she hates it. She hates not knowing and she wants to remember who she was; that's wall she wants.

She cries into the dirt and hears rushed footsteps walk by her. She thinks herself to be dead, but she knows better than that; death would never be this unkind. She wants the Doctor, she needs the Doctor. She can't stay like this forever; it will surely destroy what is left of her. Then she hears it, she hears this wonderful fantastic mad voice and she knows that it isn't real, but she listens anyway

You can hear me. I know you can.

She can't see him, but she knows that it's him. She knows and she is so happy that she forgets the danger that he's brought against himself. He shouldn't be here. It's not safe for him – he needs to get out. She screams it. She yells get out for what seems hours on end, but she knows that he won't listen. He came in here for a reason and that old man is too stubborn to listen to whatever she has to say.

She stands up and opens her eyes which are red and sore from crying. She looks for him, bust se still can't see him. Then suddenly she's pushed down and dirt or dust comes spewing down and she tells him to get out again, because he's making the time stream collapse. But he won't leave, not without her, he tells her. And it makes her tingle; she doesn't know what this feeling is.

He sends her a leaf; the most important leaf in human history, he says, because she came into this work because of it. And though she wants him to leave her here so he can be safe and go save other planets. She takes the leaf in her hand, and he's suddenly meters away from her.

He's not real, he can't be real, and so she looks at him with a long hard stare. He looks distraught, like he's lost a dog or something like that and she fights the urge to laugh. He's looking at her like she's a lost puppy and she doesn't understand why because she's just an echoes of someone. She's nothing-special Clara Oswald and she doesn't even know who she is. She's so close to him, so close to getting away from this hell like dream, but she doubts her eyes, she doesn't trust them. He becons her to him with a pleading look in his eyes.

You can do it. I know you can.

How?

Because it's impossible. And you're my Impossible Girl. How many times have you saved me, Clara? Just this once, just for the hell of it, let me save you. You have to trust me, Clara. I'm real. Just one more step.

So she takes a leap of face and he's holding her like there is nothing else left in the world. She wants to poke his face, but she can't because he's too busy smothering her hair n tender kisses. She doesn't know why he's acting all gushy like this, he isn't supposed to do this. It's almost as if he's in love with her and she's a ghost.

She doesn't remember much after that, or before for that matter, but when she wakes up in the TARDIS with him hovering over her with a look of worry on his face, she feels a little better knowing that maybe he has noticed her for good this time.

He thanks her for weeks afterwards, and she tells him to shut up about it because he keeps calling her so selfless, when in truth she did it because she couldn't bear the thought of losing him. She couldn't possibly dream of a world without the Doctor and she couldn't possibly try to imagine what living without him in her life would do to her.

It was never really about him. It's never about the boys or the money or the plaque or the fame. It all comes down to selfishness, because god knows that Clara Oswald wouldn't be able to live without spending the rest of her life with the Doctor. (Oh, the things you do for love.)

If there's a place I could be
Then I'd be another memory
Can I be the only hope for you?
Because you're the only hope for me

And if we can't find where we belong
We'll have to make it on our own
Face all the pain and take it on
Because the only hope for me is you

Hello Friends! before you ask I just really like writing fics like this so im sorry if there happen to be any more stories like this included in this or anywhere else in my profile.

in response to the guest that sent me a prompt- First of all Thank you! I appreciate the thought of it. Second, I am in the process of writing it. I'm sorry, but I'm not going to use the song you suggested, not to b rude; I like the concept of the lyrics and everything, (which I used when coming up with the one-shot) I just don't really quite like the song, and I'm not sure if you read the last AN, but I said I wasn't taking requests for songs. But you will get your 12/Clara goodness. I promise :)

If any of you would like to send a prompt- I'm accepting SCENARIOS- on Tumblr, and through Pm's and reviews. if you suggest a song, I most likely WILL NOT USE IT. OKAY?

Also, please feel free to take part in my poll bc it will help me decide what to write bc I honestly how no idea what to do with myself.

Please Favorite, follow and review bc it gives me the motivation do actually write instead of leave you guys hanging for another week and stuff.

Okay, thank you. Ily and

XOXO,

bleuboxes