It was the feeling of fingertips trailing over her arm that caused her to stir the next morning. The gentle caresses back and forth across her skin brought the corners of her lips upward, though the woman did not yet open her eyes. Enjoying the cozy space between sleep and wakefulness, Melia purred at the soft kisses that were planted on the back of her neck and shoulders, each pulling the woman closer to full consciousness. The fingers stroking her arm traveled upward to her shoulder, then down her the side of her body. A single finger moved inward across her skin and traced the outline of her left breast; she gasped and felt her body lean slightly backward, her pulse quickening as the finger retraced its steps back to her side. The hand continued its descent down her body, stopping at her hip and giving it a squeeze. Melia waited, but it moved no more. Now awake, the Homs Entia turned over and opened her eyes to gaze at her bedfellow.
"Good morning." Dunban murmured as he placed his hand on her right hip, applying a slight pressure that cause a brief explosion of yearning inside her.
"Good morning."
As the man leaned towards her, she kissed him, inundating herself in the pure bliss that accompanied the touch of his lips on her own. A moment passed as they remained joined, Melia shifting herself to close the distance between their bodies. Melia engaged him in another kiss and he let out a low growl, moving his hand from her hip lower. Need burned in her stomach but the High Entia pulled away, knowing that continuing into a longer dalliance was not an option this morning. Cursing inwardly, the Empress wished she could stay with him instead of attending her meetings, reviewing her correspondence, and catching up on all the documentation that had piled up on her desk during her leave of absence.
"Be careful. If you do that again, I may not let you out of this bed." Dunban said.
She pinked and averted her eyes, feeling her skin warm at his flirtation and tried to smother a smile.
He removed his hand and she shot her eyes at him, immediately bereft of us touch. The look in his eyes had changed. "How are you? How are you...feeling?"
Pursing her lips, the woman conducted an internal assessment of her condition. The initial stinging from last night was gone; her muscles felt sore, but that was in a pleasant way, knowing how the strain came about.
"Physically, I am well." It seemed her voice too had finally recovered.
"And otherwise?"
"I..." she trailed off, her eyes falling from his face to his chest. What could she say? Just like the previous day, everything inside her was at war. But she was sure of one thing. "I am glad for...last night."
His face broke out into relief. "So am I." He furrowed his brow. "You enjoyed it?"
"Yes." Hesitant, she continued, "And did you?"
"Very much. Never think otherwise."
A small burst of joy vibrated in her heart and she embraced him, folding her body against his. Silence fell between them as he lay his chin on the top of her head and ran his fingers through her silky hair. She listened to the strong thump of his heart, and without warning her eyes became hot. Quickly, she squeezed them shut; she could not allow him to see her become emotional. When she had made the decision to sleep with him, she had done it knowing of his imminent departure. The consequences of her choice were hers to bear alone, and the High Entia would not give away the torment that she knew would hum in the background for the next few days.
"I assume you need to go?"
Melia nodded, forcing the lump in her throat down.
"Where are you off to this morning?"
"I am meeting with Serenity to discuss what is left to do. She has full minutes of all my meetings from yesterday."
"Is there much left to be done?"
"With the current state of things, I anticipate most projects will be wrapped up between six months to a year, though all major and necessary projects will be completed in the next two months."
"That's an accomplishment, Melia. Congratulations." He gave her another kiss on the top of her head.
"Yes, it is." Though she kept her voice light, she did not feel the excitement she ought to. "I look forward to the High Entia finding their lives fully restored, even though things will never be quite the same."
"They are lucky to have you."
A thought crossed her mind and she pushed against it. However, it refused to leave and fought back. If she were being rational, it was unwise to indulge. She needed to accept the singular moment and move on. But that was a ridiculous notion. She had known that to be true, even before she had engaged Dunban in bed.
"Would you come by this evening?" Melia asked, a small shred of fear encased in the resolve of her quiet tone.
Dunban looked at her with solemn eyes. "Are you sure?"
"If you don't wish to..."
Shaking his head, he took her hand and gave it a squeeze. "I didn't want to make any presumptions. But if you would like my company, I would be more than happy to oblige."
"Good." Sighing, she withdrew her hand. It was too much now; the emotions threatened to overtake her. She needed space to recompose herself. The distraction of work would help. "I must be going."
However, the Homs Entia made no move to rise. She was now acutely aware of her nakedness.
As if reading her mind, the Homs said, "You don't need to be nervous, Melia."
It was silly, she knew. He had already seen her body, and yet the harsh daylight presented a different context from the dim lighting of the previous evening. The scars, the green lines, the smallness of her curves would be seen in their full entirety instead of through the lens of sensual lighting.
"Do you want me to turn around?"
She shook her head and scooted towards her side of the bed, the bed sheet wrapped tightly around her. Still her heart flitted back and forth in her chest and she swung her legs over the edge, toes barely touching the carpeted floor. A bounce of the mattress caused her to twist around to see Dunban rise from the bed. Face hot and flushed, Melia turned her eyes to the ground in front of her, the image of his backside seared into her mind, causing a slight explosion of arousal in her core.
Two feet came into view.
"Melia."
Her eyes flew upward up at him, taking in the entirety of his physique. That man was quite a wonder in the anatomical sense. Combined with his thoughtful, logical, generous personality, he was more than she could ever ask for and she counted herself lucky to have been the object of his affections. Blessed even. But she wouldn't say it aloud. Such a sentiment would sound foolish.
"My eyes are here." He said amused, unembarrassed by his nudity.
Her eyes went wide and they flew to the floor again, cheeks warm with shame.
"It's alright," he teased. Taking her hand, Dunban helped the Empress to her feet and she dropped the sheet to the ground. Tipping her chin up, he gazed into her eyes. "You're beautiful, Melia." Bringing his lips to hers, he gave them a kiss, a combination of longing and acceptance embedded in his mouth. The contact was enough to make warmth explode all over the woman's body. It screamed for more when he broke the kiss and took a step backward. "See you tonight. I look forward to it."
"So do I." Dipping her head, she scooted past him to the washroom. In the doorway, the High Entia glanced back at him and smiled. He looked perfect, standing there in nothing, his hair falling casually over his broad shoulders, the outlines of his muscles and scars illuminated by the streaks of sunshine coming into the room between the gaps in the curtains, and the slight curve of his lip against the sharp jawline. As the woman stared at him, she burned his visage into her memory. There would only be a few more days of these moments until they would no longer occur. And the Homs Entia wanted to remember them as best as possible.
As she undressed and entered the shower, Melia reflected on the past day. How quickly things changed. Water ran through her hair, cascading down her pale skin to the tiled floor, wrapping her body in an effervescent embrace. She breathed in the steam, exhaling stress that lay in wait in her stomach. Images of the previous night flashed through her mind and a smile danced on her lips. Despite her inexperience, the woman had felt confident all the while. Such a passion had taken hold of her person and she had followed her every instinct in the night dance. Turning her face upward into the water and closing her eyes, the young woman recalled the grasping of hands, the intertwining of legs, the panting of their breathing. The Empress wrapped her arms around herself and felt a wave of gratitude roll through her. Nothing had felt so wonderful, so euphoric.
Though she had come to know Dunban well in a completely different light these past months, he continued to take her breath away.
A half an hour later, dressed and ready for the day ahead, the Empress entered the Eastern Sitting Room to find Serenity seated at a small tea table on the far side of the room next to a large window. Hastily, the young woman rose upon seeing Melia enter and gave her a small curtsey.
"Good morning, Empress. I hope you are feeling better today."
"I am, thank you."
Melia gestured to the chairs and they both sat.
"How are you, Serenity?"
"I'm quite well, your Highness. Thank you for inviting me to join you this morning."
Nodding, Melia poured tea for them both, observing how Serenity squirmed in her chair.
"What is it Serenity?"
"If I may, Empress?"
"Of course. You are more than welcome to speak freely."
"I don't mean to be forward or overstep my bounds or anything."
"Do not worry, Serenity. Speak your mind."
"Well, you seem...lighter. As if a small part of your burden has been lifted from your shoulders." Serenity furrowed her brow. "Actually, that is not quite what I mean." Her eyes widened. "I don't mean to imply that you are constantly unhappy or miserable or sad or—"
"You are right, Serenity." Melia cut off the impending hysterics of the younger woman. "I do feel...hopeful for the first time in a while that the people will finally have peace."
"I hope you will consider that once everything is said and done, you can give yourself a break. Especially after everything you've done for the High Entia."
"Did Tyrea put you up to this?"
"Not at all! This is something I fully believe."
"I will think about it. I appreciate your concern for my well being. It's very thoughtful."
"I just think...well...you've already given up so much. You deserve to be free to pursue your own dreams too."
The sentiment touched her. This past year, Serenity had been a faithful servant, always attending Melia as best as she could. And the young woman had not quit, even after the incident with Camar. Instead, it had strengthened her resolve to help end matters of the restoration. Serenity had always been her third guardian, next to James and Elrich, and for that, she was truly thankful.
"Thank you, Serenity. Without your support I do not know how I would've managed to get anything accomplished."
Serenity pinked. "Thank you, Empress. You honor me."
"I speak nothing but the truth." Melia smiled and took a sip of tea. "Shall we see what is left to be done?"
"Melia!"
The Empress looked up from her desk to see Fiora standing in the doorway of her study. Working in her suite had felt claustrophobic, so Melia had opted to work in the study just a few doors down in the Villa. She did not habit it frequently, but now it seemed necessary in order to power through the amount of work she had to accomplish. When she worked in the study, it was clear to visitors that she would not be disturbed.
However, it seemed her friend thought otherwise. But of course, seeing Fiora was not an unwelcome interruption from reading the new trade agreement that the People's Council had drafted to be executed with the Nopon nation. The Homs stood in the doorway, her brown hair tossled and cheeks pink; it appeared that she had hurried from wherever her previous destination was.
"Dunban just told me that he's leaving. Are you okay?" Fiora took a seat across from the High Entia, her forehead creased and a frown on her lips.
There it was. Melia should have known it would only be a matter of time before Fiora had shown up to discuss her romantic issues.
How would she answer that question? Obviously, she was not okay, but the Empress did not want to burden her friend with the truth. She had successfully avoided the thoughts for most of the morning, but just after midday, they had crept from the darkness to the forefront of her mind, polluting her mood during her meeting with the newly appointed Minister of the Treasury, who had pointedly asked her when she was planning to choose a Consort.
A Consort. That was the very last thing she wanted to think about. And what business of his was it?
She didn't want to choose anyone but—
Don't.
The woman shut that door before the thought could escape.
Now she was attempting to dismiss that entire conversation. Pushing herself through tedious paperwork had only stayed the sorrow and fury, but it still hunched over her as she ran her pen over parchment, scanning for items to edit and requirements to revise.
With Fiora's appearance, her wall of resolve cracked.
"We have discussed it."
"Ugh, I'm so sorry. He can be so stubborn sometimes."
"It's alright Fiora. I have made my peace with it."
The half lie burned on her tongue but the Homs Entia did not take her eyes from her best friend's, for that would truly indicate her falsity.
The Homs eyed her skeptically. "I don't believe you."
Melia smiled. Regardless of her tactics, Fiora knew better. But the Homs Entia knew to say naught. After all, Dunban was Fiora's brother. The Empress did not wish to put Fiora in an awkward situation.
"Well, I chewed him out anyway."
Melia smothered a grin as she looked down at her papers.
"Anyway, um, I wanted to talk to you about something else." Fiora shifted in her seat. Looking up, Melia bit the inside of her mouth in anticipation. "I have to go back to Colony 9 too."
The High Entia's stomach dropped.
"Ah, I see."
"I've been offered a job as the Homs Colonies' ambassador to the Machina nation."
"Fiora, that's wonderful news!"
"Right? I'm pretty excited." Fiora grinned then bit her lip. "I'm sorry I have to leave."
"Please don't apologize, Fiora. I'm just grateful you came to visit in the first place." Melia smiled. "And I am very glad that you are going to a position that you are excited for."
"I'll still come to visit you. I promise."
"And I will as well. Perhaps we could write to each other?"
"Yeah, that sounds great, Melia." Fiora said and continued, "Maybe we could get lunch right before I leave?"
"I would like that very much."
"Great! I'll make the arrangements with Serenity." Fiora exclaimed and popped up from her seat. "I'll leave you to it." With a wink, the human woman skipped out of the door, leaving Melia with a combination of disappointment and happiness for her friend. With Fiora leaving, she assumed the rest of her friends would be departing as well. It made sense, now that calm had come to the High Entia. But that didn't mean she was not saddened to see them go.
Reminding herself of the benefits of isolation, the Homs Entia knew she could devote her full attention to the High Entia. That would be best, for that was her duty as Empress. Her one priority was the welfare of her people and she needed to refocus her energies. With this stony resolve, Melia returned to her work, shutting off the emotions coming to a boil inside her, wishing to be released.
Minutes blended into hours and the sun set in the blink of an eye. After the long day, the High Entia was ready to retire with a glass of wine and a blank mind. It was 20:00 when Melia returned to her chambers, noting that her guest would be coming by shortly. Too exhausted to pretty herself for Dunban's arrival, the woman wandered into her kitchen, picked out a bottle of wine and poured herself a glass instead. As she sipped the dark red liquid, her thoughts considered his upcoming appearance. Perhaps it would be better to send him away. Once again, the Empress reminded herself that this dalliance was only assisting the eventual heartbreak she would feel when Dunban left.
And yet, another voice called out to contradict the cold, rationale. After last night, everything had changed. And she wanted as much of him as possible before he was no longer available to her.
This revelation itself was rather embarrassing to the woman as Melia never had thought herself as a sexual creature. In fact, her suppositions had been quite the opposite. She thought she would not be interested in such physical activities, having never been exposed to such feelings before. Granted, the Homs Entia had never had the chance to ask anyone about the details of desire, which could have provided insight into her own nature. Of course at puberty, she had received education about the mechanics of her body's evolution and what that meant for future reproduction, but there lacked any discussion of the emotional elements or biological sensations. Growing up as the princess meant that any curiosities she had could only truly be answered by books, as her studies were devoted to molding her into the voice of the people. Anything else was considered superfluous. And the girl had been far too embarrassed to crack open one of the many classic romances, thus leaving her in the dark on the art of love.
Taking a drink of her wine, Melia felt the dry liquid swarm down her insides, increasing the sensuality she began to feel imbuing her cells. Now, she couldn't stop thinking about the way his body felt against hers, his lips on her breast, his hand between her legs.
There was a knock at the door. The woman took another sip of wine savoring its dark taste.
"Come in."
The door opened and her eyes went straight to his. As Dunban closed the door, she poured a second glass of wine. When he approached, she could see a hunger in his eyes, like the one she felt in herself. Her blood turned to fire, but she made no move to engage him. Instead, the Homs Entia waited for him to come to her.
"How was your day?" She asked.
"Fine. And yours?" He took the glass of wine she offered and sipped.
"Fine."
They stood there in silence, neither able to start a worthwhile conversation as they were aware of the tension thick in the air. A phantom heat enveloped her, and beads of sweat dotted the back of her neck. She set her glass down and so did he, the clink of the glass on the countertop breaking the blanket of silence.
"To hell with it." And he was grasping her around the waist and kissing her hard. Dunban pushed forward and her back pressed against the wall. Her hands ran through his hair, grabbing it and crushing his mouth into hers. She bit down on his lip and he growled, bracing her hips into his. Desire swelled within her lower body, and Melia moaned in his mouth. He pulled his lips from hers and she saw the craving written on his features.
"Bed." She murmured.
Without hesitation, Dunban took her hand and lead her to her bedroom.
"Dunban, is it always like this?"
"No, I don't think so."
"Was it this way with the many other women you've been with?"
"Melia, I have only been with two other women. That is not 'many'."
"Well, was it?"
"Do you really want to know?"
"I am genuinely curious."
"Not with the first one. To be honest, I hardly remember that relationship. With Senara...are you sure you want to know?"
"Yes."
"Alright. It was...intense. Not in the same way as how we are. I did not have the same connection with her as I do with you."
"When you say 'intense', do you mean...more passionate? More...exciting?"
"No. It was more about the physical nature of it. I'd say ours is deeper than that, which is why it's different." Pause. "Regardless, it seems you already have a keen interest in experimenting."
"You have an ample amount of knowledge to draw upon. I see no reason to let it go to waste."
"I wouldn't say 'ample'."
"We've done many things, Dunban. I can't imagine you learned how to do all of it from two people. Are you sure there aren't other women in your past? Or men?"
"Melia!"
"Dunban, it's alright. I will not judge you. In fact, perhaps I should thank all those that came before me since I get to reap the benefits."
"You are cruel."
"I prefer to think of it as witty."
"But really, Melia. It's only this way because of how we feel about each other."
"I know. And I'm thankful for that."
"I will have many memories to keep me warm on the road."
Pause.
"It worries me, you being alone out there. What if something happens?"
"Nothing will happen."
"You don't know that."
"You don't have faith in me?"
"Don't twist my words, Dunban. You know what I mean."
"I survived a Mechon attack and protected Fiora on my own. I'll be fine."
"Your arm wasn't injured then."
"That's true. But I've learned how to fight without it. You've seen me."
"Yes. You are quite...impressive."
"I think you were looking for 'godlike'."
"That is not the only way you are godlike."
"Oh, really? What other ways?"
"In truth...you inspire emotions inside me that I have never experienced before."
"What else do I inspire inside of you?"
"Dunban!"
"It was an innocent question."
"Hardly! What do you take me for?"
"Breathtaking."
"Kiss me."
He kissed her, lingering a moment before letting go.
"Do you think with the way things are going that you could take time off to pursue your own goals?"
"I don't know."
"You should. What about building a nursery? You already have a garden to draw from."
"That would be nice. But I must see the rest of the projects through before I can consider anything else."
"Melia, you have to take care of yourself."
"I am."
"You've gone through a lot this year. You need to some time for yourself."
"Not until everything is done."
"You are the Empress. Will everything ever be done?"
"I'm sure that once the restoration efforts are completed, things will settle down."
"I know you, Melia. You will always find something to fix out of a sense of duty to the High Entia."
"Because it is my duty."
"You have a responsibility to safeguard your people. And you can't do that if you're sacrificing your own health, physical and mental."
"Please do not tell me how to do my job. I was doing just fine before you arrived."
"You—"
"I don't want to argue about this, Dunban."
Pause.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."
"It's fine."
"It's not fine. I can hear it in your voice."
"You apologized. I know you meant well."
"You're not the only one who worries, Melia."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm concerned about you. What happens when I...leave."
"There's nothing to worry about. I know full well what needs to be done and I will be able to deal with anything else that comes my way."
"I don't doubt that. I just don't want you to be alone either."
"I won't be. I have Tyrea and Serenity."
"Alright."
Pause.
"That doesn't mean I won't think about you, Dunban."
"Nor will I."
"Please be safe."
"I will. Otherwise, Fiora will have my head."
"Very likely. She can be rather intimidating."
"You don't know the half of it."
"I'm not sure I want to."
Pause.
"Do you want to sleep?"
"No, not yet."
"Good, neither do I. I think I need more memories for the road."
"Then let us make them, my slave."
"Excuse me?"
"I meant sycophant."
"You think this is funny, don't you?"
"Or would peon better suit you?"
"That's it. You'll regret that."
And Melia laughed as Dunban pounced and dragged her under the covers.
The next three days passed in the blink of an eye. Each morning, Melia awoke, showered and dressed for the day (each time feeling a little stronger and stronger in her routine). Each morning, she would walk out to the parlor to see her lover — what a strange word to use, even if it were accurate — making breakfast. They would make eye contact and both would smile, and inside her heart would sigh. Each time, they would sit together in the kitchen, enjoying each other's company, dancing around the upcoming split, making light of it when it interrupted their conversation. Then they would head their separate ways, with the unspoken promise of seeing each other later. Each night, he would come to her chambers and they would end up in a passionate embrace in bed, and the hours after, they continued to talk until they fell asleep.
"Dunban, are you awake?"
Pause.
No response.
Pause.
"I love you."
When the Empress awoke on the fourth day, her stomach clamped together and the urge to vomit boiled up inside of her. Wrestling with her insides, she grappled control over body, pushing the burning acid back down her esophagus. Slumping back on her pillow, she swallowed and sighed, feeling the scorch on her throat. Today was the day. Dunban was leaving, venturing into the world unknown and leaving her behind. And they would never be the same again.
Turning on her side, Melia focused her eyes on the man that lay in bed with her. She had no desire to rise and begin her morning routine. This morning, she would delay the responsibilities that weighed upon her and indulge herself one last time. Exhaling, she watching the slow rise and fall of his chest and the peaceful smile on his lips. His eyes were obscured by the locks of dark hair that spread over his face. Once again, the High Entia stared hard, memorizing every dot of his being for those future evenings when she missed him and could call upon such memories. While the heartbreak would be overwhelming, the woman reminded herself that she had chosen this path. She made her bed and now had to lie in it. Any misery the Empress felt in the days after this one was her own fault.
"What's on your mind?"
His words pulled her out of her trance. Blinking the sleep out of his eyes, Dunban pushed his hair out of his face, revealing the brown eyes that pierced through her straight to her heart.
"I didn't realize you were awake."
"I just woke up a few minutes ago." He did not take his eyes off of her as he sat up. "Are you alright?"
"Of course." She smiled, overcompensating.
"Melia..."
"I'm going to shower." Quickly, the young woman sat up and turned to her back to him before her emotions could get the better of her. All she needed to do was hold herself together until he left that afternoon. Then she could dissolve.
"Can I join you?"
"I don't know. Can you?" The woman teased, still keeping her back to him. Glancing over her shoulder, she saw him glowering at her and couldn't resist a snarky grin.
"May I join you?"
Turning away, she felt the skin prickle on the back of her neck. Six days ago, Melia would have politely declined. But today, he was leaving. There was no way her heart would let her deny him. These were the last hours they had together, and she wanted to make each minute count.
"Yes."
Both nude, they walked into the washroom and she padded over to the shower as calmly as possible, pulling on levers to set the temperature to a perfect balance of hot and cold. Her heart beat quickened as she felt the warmth of his body appear behind her. Delicately, the young woman stepped into the shower box, and Dunban followed her inside, closing the glass door behind him.
Droplets of water rained down from the shower head, covering the pair, soaking them in a matter of seconds. Melia washed her face, avoiding Dunban's eyes expertly so she could wipe away tears that trickled down her cheeks and intermingled with the water droplets from above. Her lavender hair plastered itself to her back and over her chest, as if it were a physical shield to protect her from the intangible heartache to come. There was a slight tug on her elbow and she turned to find the man watching her with sad eyes. Her heart twisted in her chest and the wave of nausea brewed once more. Tenderly, he drew her into an embrace, kissing her temple, then brushing his nose against hers. As she wrapped her arms around his neck, they're bodies swayed together to a silent melody. It was an embrace of two lovers knowing their time together was coming to an inevitable end.
Neither said anything. For her, there was nothing left to say. Weeks ago, the Empress had asked him to stay and he had said no. And last night, she had confessed to Dunban that which she had yearned to share since her metamorphosis back to an High Entia. She had known he was asleep and did not hear her. Even though Melia had grown more courageous during her recovery period, it was not enough to support her in opening herself completely. Those were the last door to her heart; sharing them with the object of her affection would leave her as vulnerable as she could ever be. And a rejection would cut her too deep. So she shared those words in the dark of night. It was a cowardly way to confess her feelings, though 'confession' was too strong a word to use since he did not know. But some part of her felt uplifted from speaking those words aloud. Even if they would never receive a response.
Walking out onto the landing bay, Melia felt herself tense at the sight of her friends loading up into a silver shuttle. Oranges and yellows streaked the sky as Reyn shoved bags into the back of the shuttle, Shulk handing him the last of the luggage. Sharla was engaged in a discussion with Bella while Fiora and Dunban stood to the side away from the group, deep in a conversation that looked rather contentious. A pang ran through her and she trembled. They were really leaving, and the truth was, she did not want them to go. Any of them.
As she neared the party, Dunban looked up from his conversation and met her eyes. The Empress looked back at him, concealing the anguish that sliced through her body with stony eyes. Turning away, the woman greeted the others, making light and happy conversation, though keeping her manner reserved. If she could maintain a distant exterior, it would be enough to make it through these next few moments until she could retreat to a private space and collapse.
The sun continued to dip in the sky, and finally the shuttle's pilot called out that they needed to depart. One by one, each of her friends came to her and said their good-byes. First Reyn, second Shulk, and third Sharla. Fiora was the next to bid her farewell.
"I'm going to miss you, Melia." Fiora gave a sad smile.
"So will I."
"Despite all of the crazy stuff that happened, I really had a great time hanging out with you."
"I hope we never have to go through any of that sort again."
"Agreed." Fiora sighed and pulled her into a hug. "Don't be a stranger, 'k?"
Nodding, the High Entia squeezed her eyes shut, a lump growing in her throat as she hugged Fiora. She hadn't known saying good-bye would be so difficult. Eventually, the two women pulled away.
Rubbing her eye, Fiora grinned. "I'll see you soon, Melia."
"I look forward to it."
Fiora winked and climbed into the shuttle. Melia felt her heart swell in her chest. She hoped it would not be too long away until they could reunite. And hopefully under better circumstances.
Her heart stilled. The time was now. She didn't want to. But she had to.
Taking a deep breath, the Empress turned her head to see Dunban, his eyes focused on her intently. A chill ran down her back, but she straightened and shoved the lump in her throat down.
"I guess this is it." He said.
"So it is."
Silence.
"Good luck with everything, Melia."
"You as well, Dunban. I do hope you find what you're looking for."
They stood in silence. She watched him, keeping her face blank. It seemed that he was waiting for her, for some sign. Of what, she did not know. Presumably one that would indicate that they would have an affectionate goodbye. But in that moment, she felt the flare of anger and hurt at his decision to depart, and it was enough to keep her from saying or doing anything of the sort. Instead, the woman kept her hands folded in front of her, offering no consolation or approval for his actions.
Dunban nodded to her and boarded the shuttle. A part of her screamed to stop him and kiss him good-bye, but she threw the thought out as quickly as it had come. No, if he chose to leave, then she would let him go. She would not throw herself at someone and sacrifice her self-respect. As the shuttle door closed, and so did a room in her heart.
Stepping back, the young woman watched as the aircraft rose and hovered in the air against the orange and purple ribbons in the sky. As her eyes scanned the windows, Melia caught sight of Dunban as he took a seat. He glanced out the window and once again their eyes met.
The shuttle rose into the sky and raced away.
Sitting in her parlor, Melia willed the tears away as Serenity walked into the room, her face a mixture of empathy and concern.
"Empress? What can I do for you? How can I help?"
"Would you please bring Tyrea here?"
"Absolutely." And she dashed away.
Tears streamed down Melia's cheeks as soon as the door closed behind her assistant. She cursed herself over and over: how naive she had been to think he would change his mind, how stupid of her to give herself over and over again knowing it would only hurt her more, and how idiotic of her to believe that she had made peace with his decision.
Clearly, she had decidedly not.
Angry tears fell in rivers down her face as the woman stood and began to pace the room, crying with each step. The sun had fallen under the horizon, and the stars began to twinkle, reminding her that this night she would be alone. Without him.
She was so angry that she could scream. Why had she let this happen? This was exactly what her father had advised against; she was to never get attached. It would only lead to heartbreak. Her body flushed and hands balled into fists. She wouldn't make that mistake again.
Her emotions continued to overwhelm her. The Empress had to get the better of them, think about all of this with a clear head. The rational thing to do would be to accept the outcome and move on. His decision to leave had naught to do with her.
And yet it didn't feel that way.
Hugging her sides, the Homs Entia leaned against the door leading out to the balcony. Despite all of the anger and heartbreak, she still wanted him. To hear his voice once more was all she wished for in that moment. Scraping her nails over her clothes, she rolled her forehead onto the window and wept. How could that be, when another part of her wanted to rage? Once again, Melia found herself feeling too many things all at once. She knew she wouldn't be able to make sense of them. Couldn't. At least, not now. And most likely not the next day, or the next. It would take time to process, both emotionally and rationally.
And that is exactly why she had called Tyrea.
She knew Tyrea was the only one she could call as she was the only one who understood what Melia needed to do in this painful moment. Melia could have called upon Serenity, but the young woman would be a shoulder to cry on, which was not what Melia could afford herself. Grieving would only encourage the pain. She could have called upon James and Elrich. They would be happy to entertain and distract her, but she knew that they would also be at a loss for words and try to console her; that would not do.
But her stepsister would do none of that. Tyrea would do the exact opposite. The Homs Entia would not allow Melia to sit and work and ignore the despair nor would she allow any wallowing whatsoever. No, her stepsister would force the Empress out of her chambers and misery, coerce Melia into mischief, and aid her in burying the heartache. Ignoring it could only last for so long, Melia knew. Burying it could last almost forever. And that's what she needed: to bury the love that would not be requited.
The door opened and Melia wiped her eyes. Glancing towards to the doorway, the Empress saw her stepsister standing rigid, arms crossed, eyes narrowed.
"Enough of that. Are you ready?"
It was time to say good-bye to her love.
"Yes."