Here is the new third chapter. I know, I need to get these out faster, but I am having surgery on Friday and have been getting ready for that. I will try and have another chapter up within two weeks, but I cannot promise anything. With these edited chapters I am trying to fix plot holes, spelling and grammar mistakes, and I want to make longer more detailed chapters. I am adding some of the older chapters together, well, basically, and adding more to them.
Anyway, I am going to promote my new forum now. If you go to my profile you will find a link to my new fan fiction forum. Now I am still working on it, but I need members. It is about any type on anime fan fiction, and you can post your stories there. I know I will be there quite often as I get my new website ready. I will probably add previews of my upcoming chapters/stories there, and people can talk to me on there. So please join, I really need members.
WARNING: Uh, emotional? Just a bit, but nothing else.
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Inuyasha, the song "Vasoline" by Stone Temple Pilots or the song "Sinking Ship" by Devics
one time a thing occurred to me
what's real, and what's for sale?
blew a kiss and tried to take it home
I had gone back to my room after I broke things off with Inuyasha. I wanted to get away, thinking that I would start crying at any moment, but to my surprise I didn't. I was not taking the breakup as hard as I thought that I would, and it almost felt wrong. I had thought that I loved him for so long, and now I am not sure if I even really liked him all that much. It is an odd feeling to all of a sudden come to that realization, knowing that you spent so long with someone and that you can never have that time back. Not that it was all bad, at first it was amazing, but, it wasn't real. I wanted it so bad that I fooled myself, making myself think that it was it was everything that I had dreamed of, that he was what I wanted, but that was wrong.
My whole life up until this point had been one big game, and I always ended up losing. I thought that finally ended when I met Inuyasha, I thought that I had won for once in my life, but of course that was not it. But now that I think about it, I feel great. I feel free to live my life however I want to, not worrying about someone else and what they want, it is only what I want now.
"But what do I want?"
I want a lot of things, some things that I know I can never have, but I want them nonetheless. I want to be a singer, I always have ever since I was little and I would perform in the living room for my mother and all of her friends. Of course when my mother died I stopped, for a few years at least. Once my step-father kicked me out and took my brother, I had to get a job and that is when I met Inuyasha and his older sister. At first I was not all that interested in Inuyasha, I just wanted to do a good job so that I could make money and support myself. He was so persistent with his attempts to ask me out, so one day I finally said yes and we were together for two years. It seems like such a long time ago when I came here, but I know that it wasn't. I have made some amazing friends that I would not trade for anything and that I know think the same about me. It is hard to think about anything changing here, and I know with me and Inuyasha broken up something is bound to go wrong.
Kira's POV
it isn't you, isn't me
search for things that you can't see
going blind, out of reach
somewhere in the Vaseline
I walked down one of the may halls in the hotel, making my way to the elevator. I had plans to bug Sesshoumaru until he gave in and let Kagome stay with us. I did not like the idea of her staying at the hotel, even though we have amazing security when they get off their asses and actually do what they are paid to do. It is an amazing hotel, but she needs a real place with friends around, somewhere she can feel at least a little bit at home in. We have the room, actually, we have more than enough room for nearly half of the staff to have a slumber party, as funny as that sounds. He has never really met Kagome, just hired her off of my recommendations, and because I would not give him back his newspaper until he agreed.
"What are you doing down here?" I asked my little brother when I saw him waiting in front of the same elevator I was looking for.
"I need to talk to Sesshoumaru," he said softly, something obviously bothering him, and me without a camera.
"Well wait in line, because I need to talk to him first," I said in that tone I use when I want him to obey me and just shut up, but of course he was never the brightest bulb in the batch and never gets it.
"No way, I was here first," he sneered at me as the door opened.
Before he knew what was happening I pushed him to the ground and got on, closing the doors before he could get up, but, of course, no before I stuck my tongue out at him. I knew that he would be mad, and to be honest, I could not care less. He was always babied when we were all growing up. He was younger and weaker than me and Sesshoumaru, so of course he got special attention. Even now he is favored, but of course we try our hardest not to see our father or step-mother.
"But those rare occasions are oodles of fun,"
The elevator stopped at the top floor a few seconds later, dropping me off a few feet away from my brothers annoying assistant. She was new, and like so many of the others, thought that she had a chance with my brother if she wore skimpy skirts and cleavage revealing shirts. She was of course wrong when she thought this, Sesshoumaru never even looked at his secretaries, they should consider themselves lucky if he even knew their names. I did not even bother with talking to the girl, I always just walk in, so there was no point. She got up to say something to me when I reached the door to his office, but I just glared at her before I pushed the door open, she sat back down.
"Dearest brother, I really must speak with you," I said as I shut the doors and walked to take a seat in front of his desk.
"Then speak," was all he said as he continued to read whatever it was that he had been reading when I came in.
"Well, I know that I told about what happened to Kagome last night with that letter," I said, pausing a second so that I could take a breath.
"I was thinking about it and decided that she cannot go back home, and the hotel is not such an ideal place for her to stay either. So I was thinking that since we have the room that she could come and stay with us,"
Sesshoumaru did not say anything, he just looked at me. Sometimes it was so hard for me to read his face, and I know that he enjoys watching me squirm, so all I could do was sit and wait for him to say something.
"Very well, since she is an asset to the casino, and a friend of yours of course, she can stay with us,"
I was fairly shocked when he gave in right away, usually he put up a fight with me, mostly for entertainment purposes of course. I could feel myself smiling, something I do often compared to Sesshoumaru, and it finally hit me. I got my way, and I couldn't be happier.
"Now you can go and tell her so that she can have some of her things brought over. I will call the house and have someone set the guest room up for her," Sesshoumaru said, now back to his papers, making me want to burn them.
"I would, but, Inuyasha is downstairs waiting to talk to you," I said, waiting to see if he would answer, or even look up, but he didn't.
"Of course I could go watch Kagome sing and let Inuyasha come up here and bother you with whatever problem he is having today,"
And that is what got him.
"If you do that then I will kill you,"
Okay, not the response that I was going for, but good enough.
"Then come downstairs with me, he will not want to talk about whatever it is with everyone around," I said as I gave my best innocent look, which is anything but.
"Fine, just give me a minute to finish reading these,"
I love getting my way.
"I'll meet you at the elevator,"
Kagome's POV
two times and it has rendered me
punch drunk and without bail
think I'd be safer all alone
flies in the Vaseline we are
sometimes it blows my mind
keep getting stuck here all the time
It was my day of from the restaurant. Usually when I had a show they let me off that day, they did not want me to be tired on stage, something I am glad for. I do not know what would happen if I went on stage after an eight to twelve hour shift. The room that I am staying in is nice, not too bug, but not too small either. Kira had probably picked it out, and for that I love her even more. She always makes sure that I am well taken care of, and now I get to tell her that I dumped her little brother. I do not think that she will be mad, not at all, she will more than likely be happy. Kira and Inuyasha have never gotten along very well, and she once told me that she only tolerates him for me.
"I guess that's over,"
I can almost see her face now, how happy she will be when I tell her that she can start picking on Inuyasha again. I know she has missed that, not that she hugs him every time she sees him now, but I know she holds a lot of stuff back and I know how hard that is for her when Inuyasha is being a jerk.
"Which is almost all of the time when he is around Kira," I said to myself before going back to my hair.
I was getting ready for the show tonight, albeit a bit earlier than normal, but I had nothing else to do today but sit around. Normally I would be at home relaxing, something that was always hard for me to do here. It is just an uneasy feeling to know that you could see your boss nearly any time of the day, and you do not want him to see you not working, even if it is your day off. Sesshoumaru was at work everyday, I do not think that there has been a day when he was not here for any reason. I kind of feel sorry for him when I think about it, being all alone in that office everyday. Sometimes he will have food sent up, I am usually the one volunteered to bring it too him, but usually Kira took care of making sure that he ate.
Sometimes when I hear Kira talk about him it seems like he would not survive without her. It will be such a sad day for him when Kira gets married and moves out, he will be all alone and he will have to watch her be happy somewhere else. But, I guess that is just life, you have to take everything as it comes and learn to cope with it all.
"I just hope it all gets better soon,"
Sesshoumaru's POV
it isn't you, isn't me
search for things that you can't see
going blind, out of reach
somewhere in the Vaseline
I was not very happy about leaving my office to go down and seat with the customers. That was always Kira's job, to get chummy with all of the customers while I took care of all of the business stuff. I did not feel like dealing with Inuyasha today, though any other day I would feel the same, I was just not in a very good mood. I did not want to deal with listening to whatever he had to babble of about now. It was probably something that he wanted me to fix, it usually was. When he has a problem he usually runs to me or our father to fix it, such a pathetic waste.
I signed the papers that I had been reading and set them aside on my desk. I knew that Kira was waiting for me and if I was not out soon then she would come in with a death glare. Not that I am scared of her, but I do not like the headaches that her rants leave me with. I stood up and made my way outside, ignoring my new secretary as I walked past her. I do not remember her name right now, but she can annoy you with just a look.
"Ready?" Kira asked when I reached her.
I wanted to say something sarcastic, but I decided to hold it in and just pushed the down button instead. I did not say anything as we got on the elevator, quiet was something that I cherished when Kira was around.
"You know you are going to have fun tonight,"
And then she ruins it.
Kira's POV
you'll see the look and you'll see the lies
you'll eat the lies, and you will.
flies in the Vaseline we are
sometimes it blows my mind
keep getting stuck here all the time
I love teasing my brothers, it is just so much fun when you are having a bad day. Though I love Sesshoumaru to death and would do anything for him, he needs a life. He barely gets out anymore, not like he did before, but it has just gotten worse. It is either work or home, sometimes the occasional family gathering, but then nothing else. I had to get him down here, it was for his own good, and for my sanity. If I had spent another day worrying about him becoming a hermit then I would have went insane.
I got him into the lobby and to a table before he started complaining. With him it never sounds like he is complaining, it sounds like he is making off-hand remarks, but I know the truth. After so many years with him, I know when he is not having fun, and I also know how to make him sit down and shut up, which he is currently doing. Kagome will be on stage in a few minutes, and then once she is done we are all going home. I have not had a chance to tell her about her new housing situation, but I am sure she will be more than happy about it. I ignored Miroku as he introduced Kagome, but when she stepped on stage I had to smile. She looked so content, and that made me happy to see her that way.
Kagome's POV
it isn't you, isn't me
search for things that you can't see
going blind, out of reach
somewhere in the Vaseline
When I stepped on to the stage and the lights dimmed, I could see Kira sitting in he small crowd. She often came to watch me, but the thing that really surprised me was the fact that Sesshoumaru was sitting next to her. I do not think that he has even heard me sing, not even before he hired me. It had been Kira that told him how good she thought I was, and from that he told her to hire me a few nights a week to sing. I did not say anything as the music began to play, I just closed my eyes and waited.
This was a new song for me, something that really made me feel something. I never liked the traditional music, I always liked to try new things, and I just happened to have fallen in love with it.
"This is it tow the line
we barely made it back this time
on the deck half open eyes
looking up to see the sunlight
swing and sway
and we sail away
oh my ship is a big black stain
in this sea of fish and fame"
"Tears and holes in the sails
she's gold but getting frail
we'll just keep taping up the floor
ignore the water and hope for the shore
water's a seeping in and the ship is filling
all the ores have gone off course
but loyally we stay aboard"
"Is this the end the top for me no
chin up stiff lip just wait and they'll give
oh my my, my, I'm a stone
I can't unleash my bells
can't unleash my bells"
"My ship can't find it's way home"
Sesshoumaru's POV
The fact that Kira tricked me into coming down here was grating at my nerves. I would have been much happier staying upstairs, though, I must admit that I had been wanting to see this Kagome girl sing. Everyone raved about how talented she was, so I wanted to see for myself. Crowds are not something that I willingly walk into, but tonight I let Kira drag me right into the middle of a fairly large one. When the girl actually come on stage everyone became silent. I had seen this girl before, a few times when Kira made me late for work and she stopped to talk to her on the way in. I had only met her once, a short introduction and an even shorter greeting.
Looking over I could see my younger brother, but he was not here watching the show. No, he had his eyes locked on one of the waitresses. On closer inspection she looked like the girl on stage, though a bit different, they were very similar. I knew that Inuyasha had been dating Kagome, but I never heard of them breaking up. I suppose I could take an actual interest in his personal life and keep track of these things, but I see no point in it, it does not serve me a real purpose. I looked back to the stage when the music started and Kagome began to sing. After a moment I realized why so many people praised this girl, she was actually very good. I am not one to listen to music very much, but I am actually enjoying this, though I would not let anyone know that.
It might be interesting to have this girl stay with us.
Kagome's POV
I was glad when the show ended, I was so nervous with Sesshoumaru in the audience. I could not help but think that if he did not like me or think that I was good enough then I would be fired. I know it is silly, but that is my worst nightmare. I need this job for so many reasons, I just could not bare to lose it. Instead of going back to the dressing room I went to my room upstairs. Going back in there just does not feel right, it leaves me with an uneasy feeling. I knew Kira was going to be waiting for me, so I changed as fast as I could before heading back downstairs. I could see Kira and Sesshoumaru still sitting there waiting for me.
I smiled and waved when Kira looked up and spotted me./ She stood up, Sesshoumaru doing he same. Kira hugged me as soon as I got close enough, and it was a much needed hug. I just wanted to break down in her arms and tell her everything that happened, but I held it together and kept smiling.
"You were wonderful tonight," Kira said as we broke the hug.
"Yes, I can see why Kira fought so hard to hire you,"
I was surprised when Sesshoumaru spoke, his voice is so strong, like it demands that you obey everything that he says.
"Thank you very much," was all that I could muster without sounding like a complete idiot.
"Well, I have great news. You no longer have a room here," Kira said, breaking the silence.
"I have no room? Does that mean I have to go home? I could pay, that wouldn't be a problem or anything,"
I was so scared that they had taken my room away and I would have to either find a new one somewhere else or go home, and I really did not want to go home. I do not even know if I could feel like that place is my home anymore, it just feels violated now.
"Of course not, you are coming home with us until we can figure all of this out,"
After she said that I was finally able to breathe again, until I realized that I would be living in the same house as Sesshoumaru. I knew Kira would pout until she got her way, and I did not want to be rude and upset her, so instead I smiled.
"Let me get my stuff then,"
Kira's POV
I helped Kagome out with her bags when she came back down a few minutes later. Sesshoumaru went to bring the car around, so I carried all of the bags myself. I did not want anymore stress put on Kagome, she seemed to be so sad these past few days, though she seems to have gotten over it a bit, I can still sense that something is wrong with her. Kagome had a smile on her face as we walked out to the car. I put her bags in the trunk before getting in next to Sesshoumaru. Kagome was in the back, and all of a sudden her smile was gone.
I suppose she thought that I could not see her, and that is what really breaks my heart, that she thinks she has to hide how she is feeling. I needed to do something to cheer her up, and when I thought about it, I had something that might cheer up two people close to me, even if it is just for a night.
"You know Sesshoumaru, I got a call from father today," I said, trying not to give away anything, and it seemed to be working.
"And what did he have to say?"
And here is the plan.
"He called to inform me that there is a party coming up, and he demands that we both attend, complete with dates,"
I could see the look in his eyes, and it was not a pretty one. He hated these things, more so when he had to find someone to go with. He did not have trouble finding a girl willing to go, he just had trouble finding one that was not a complete idiot.
"You know, instead of going through all of the trouble of finding a date that you actually stand, why don't you just invite Kagome?"
I watched his face, at first there was a look that said something akin to 'hell no', but, after a minute it changed. I knew that it was working, and I could not have been happier.
"Kagome," Sesshoumaru called out.
"Yes?" came Kagome's reply, finally coming out of her daze.
"Would you like to accompany me to a party? My father is forcing me to go, and since a date is required, I thought that you might be willing to save me from the money-hungry women that will be there,"
"I suppose I could, if it will help you out," came Kagome's meek reply.
Hook, line, and sinker.