Hey everyone! Goddess here! XD Well here a little one-shot that I've been wanting to write for a while now, so yeah. I hope you guys enjoy it :)

Disclaimer: I do not own any part of 'Bleach', neither anime nor manga.

WHAT'S LEFT OF ME

(Toshiros P.O.V.)

I sat at my office doing the usual paperwork I got during the day and, of course, without any help from my so called lieutenant. That Rangiku, when is she going to take her responsibilities serious? I guess it didn't matter now, especially since I was about done with all of it. Just a few more pages left.

I thought about what I would do after all of this. Training was out the question, especially since Captain Unohana told me to stop before I push myself to much over the edge. Damn that death glare of hers. Other than that, I can't seem to think of anything else to do. It seems after the Winter War, everyone else had moved on with their lives. Everyone except for me.

Sighing, I stood from my chair and walked over to the window that was behind my desk. I gazed out at Seireitei, my home, and wondered about a certain peach girl. We haven't spoken one word to each other since the incident, mainly me who couldn't even look at her without nearly breaking down from that gruesome memory. I know that everyone, even Momo, says that it wasn't my fault, but just knowing that it was me that did that to her...it shreds my very being to pieces.

I shook my head of those thoughts and decided to walk for some fresh air. After organizing the papers for Rangiku to turn in tomorrow, I excited the office and walked out into the streets. Everything was as it should be, soul reapers on duty or relaxing in their day offs. It seemed like just another day on or off the job.

Not realizing where I was coming up, I suddenly felt the spiritual pressure of an all to very familiar person. I turned and saw that I was just at the entrance of the Fifth Division Barracks. Did I seriously come up here unconsciously? Before I could think about it, I heard noises that sounded like shooting flames coming from the training grounds followed by the sound of crowds cheering.

Letting my curiosity get the better of me, I jumped up on the one of the roofs near the training ground and saw what all the commotion was about. It was Momo and her Tobiume, in her phoenix form, practicing their powers and abilities. It was actually quite amazing. She and Tobiume had gotten a lot better with their skills since the war. It actually made me feel really proud of her. She gone a long way, a long way without any of my help.

I sighed and was about to jump off the roof to go back to the office, when suddenly some grabbed on to my sleeve. I turned and saw that it was my lieutenant, Rangiku pulling on me.

"Hey Captain!" She greeted with that usual grin of hers. "Are you stocking someone?"

"No I'm not." Why did she always assume such stupid things? Well, I guess the position that I'm in doesn't exactly help with my situation. I couldn't help it though, all of Momos moves were amazing.

Just now she did this trick were she had her zanpakto shoot many fireballs at her and in a quick second, she dodged them all with flashstep. It was absolutely mind blowing how much shes improved. She isn't that same bed-wetting little girl anymore. Shes grown up, and even though I should be happy for her, I feel a bit...lonely.

My thoughts were interrupted when I began hearing the cheers of all the soul reapers again. I turned and saw Momo looking slightly surprised, like she didn't even know that everyone was watching her. She must have been really focused on her training. Some things never change I guess.

"Isn't incredible, Captain? Everyone one from all over has come to watch." Rangiku whispered, making me remember that shes still here. "Shes really improved since that whole Aizen incident. I'm so glad that shes finally moving on."

"Yeah, moving on." Without another word or waiting for her to reply, I quickly flashstepped away before Momo could see me among the group of people cheering for her. However, I was unaware that she was watching me the literally the entire time.

The weeks following seemed to be like that exact same day. I would finish my paper work, without any of Rangikus help, and then head over to the fifth division. Momo would have already started training and the crowds were already there to cheer her on. In some way, I was both happy and irritated over the fact that those people were there. It was good that she couldn't see me, but I also wished that sometimes she would perform those breathtaking moves for me only.

When her and Tobiume really got into it, it looked like a dance between a mighty fire-bird and its master, Momo leading of course. All in all, it was an unbelievably beautiful sight. I could watch for hours if it wasn't for me being to much of a coward to even talk to her. It made me feel weak, but what could I do? I still hadn't forgiven myself for what happened, and I doubt she has. Its better this way.

However, one day when I went to go watch her, I found that no one else was there. The training grounds were completely empty, except for Momo who was sitting on the ground with her sword stabbed in the ground in front of her. Since her eyes were closed, I could tell that she was meditating so I figured that I should leave before she found me watching her. However, my body didn't seem to be listening to me.

I found myself walking to her instead of away from her until I was right in front of her and her sword. Momo didn't seem to notice me yet so I decided to make myself comfortable and sat down next to her. I know what I was doing was completely reckless and stupid considering that she could come from her world any minute now and find me staring at her, but at the moment, I didn't care. I haven't even been this close to her since the war and it felt good to be beside her again, even if this was risky.

I suddenly heard light moaning coming from her and when I turned to her, I saw her face scrunching up like as if she was in pain. Not really thinking about what I was doing, I put a comforting hand on her shoulder and whispered soothing things to her. In a matter of seconds, she seemed to calm down and her facial expression returned back to normal.

Giving a sigh, I looked down at the ground and wondered about what it could possibly be that she was thinking about. Was it about her training? Or...was it me?

"Toshiro?"

Oh no, please don't let that be who I think it is. Sadly, the odds were against me because as soon as I looked and saw Momos beautiful brown eyes opened, I knew that my suspisions were confirmed. She caught me watching her.

"What are you doing here?"

"I...um...I..." Dammit, why couldn't I say anything to her? I look like a freaking idiot. I thought fast and said the first excuse that came to me, "I need you to sign some papers for me You know, the usual paperwork."

"Oh, ok. But, where are the papers?" She asked, looked around me for any documents.

I guess I should have thought about this a bit more. Wait, I think there might still be a way out of this. I replied, "I must have forgot them. Well, I guess another time then. I think I'll go now, bye!"

Just as I was about to leave, I felt her stop me by grabbing on to my captains cloak. She forced me to look back at her, but I soon regretted it because I felt my heart fall when I saw the look in her eyes. They looked so sad and lonely, just like when I first saw her through the video message when she woke up from her coma. But why? Why did she seemed so depressed?

"What's wrong, Hinamori?" I asked, sitting back down next to her. "You seem troubled."

She didn't answer me, she just sighed and looked away to her sword. Her face was unreadable and since she was especially quite now, I couldn't quite tell what it was that was bothering her. I couldn't give up though. I mean, she wanted me to stay for some reason, right?

I slowly placed a hand over hers, making her look at our hands then back at me, and gave her the my rare sincere smile reserved for her only. "It's ok Momo, you can tell me whats wrong."

The look in her eyes suddenly changed from sad to shock then to angry. Momo took her hand from mine and quickly stood up before I could ask whats wrong. She took her sword, sheathed it, then turned so that her back was to me. "Can I really tell you Hitsugaya? Or are you just going to close me off again?"

"Momo, what are you talking about?"

I could see that her shoulder muscles relaxed but she still refused to look at me. Her behavior scared me a bit, especially since the tone of her voice sounded so harsh. I was nothing but kind to her just now, so why is she getting so worked up? It didn't make sence.

She sighed, "Never mind Captain Hitsugaya. Just forget about it. Now, if you'll excuse me."

Momo was about to walk away but before she could, I quickly grabbed her hand and stopped her. Just like she had done to me before. "Hinamori, wait. Tell me whats wrong. Was it something I said or did? Please, just talk me."

She hesitated and judging from the movement of her fingers, she was debating whether or not she should hold my hand or just walk away. Sadly, she chose to walk.

Gently removing my hand from hers and looked me straight in the eyes. "I have to go." With that said, she turned her back to me and within a few seconds, she was gone.

I felt a stinging in my chest when she was no longer in my sight. It hurt so much that I actually thought I could die right then and there. Before I lost my footing, I quickly ran and flashstep away from the fifth division and returned to my own barracks, ignoring anyone who called out to me. When I arrived, I went straight to me private quarters, slammed my door shut, and locked it so that no one, especially Rangiku, could bother me.

When I was sure I was safe, I fell to me knees and slumped down so that I was holding myself up with my hands. I could feel tears coming but I refused to let them fall. I had to stay strong, I sworn on my grandmothers grave that I would never show such weakness like I did during the Winter War. I had to hold myself steady, I had to if I was ever going become good enough to protect Momo.

After a while of calming down, I layed on my futon and just stared up at the ceiling, thinking about what I could possibly do to make things right. I knew since the beginning that it was a bad idea to go see Momo, but I couldn't help myself. But I've learned my lesson and figured that it would just be right to keep my distance for her sake. And now matter how much it hurt or broke my heart, I had to do it. It was the oath I made. The oath to never hurt Momo ever again, even if it means protecting her from myself.

It had been two weeks since I last saw Momo, and I had to admit, I was holding up pretty well. I mean besides that fact that I was depressed all the time and I desparatly missed her, but at least I was getting all the paperwork in on time.

I guess my behavior hadn't been that unnoticable because on another afternoon of a usual work day, I suddenly found myself face to face with my lieutenant. She slammed her hands on my desk, making me stop what I was doing and gave me glare. I had to say, it surprised me how serious she was especially since she was always upbeat and annoying.

"What is it Rangiku?" I asked, going back to my work. "I returned all your sake bottles to you already."

"What did you do to Momo?"

The sudden question made me gasp in shock and drop the brush I was writing with. I looked up at her and asked slowly, "What are you talking about?"

"You heard me. What did you do to her?" Rangiku put both hands on her hips to make sure I knew that she was being serious. "She hasn't been going out to us girls anymore and at first I thought it was because she was to busy, but now shes even stopped training!"

"Wait a minute, Momos not training anymore?"

"Nope, not since two weeks ago." She replied. "Now tell me what you did, now!"

I flinched a bit at her yelling at me. She does know that I am her captain, right?

Shaking my head, I returned to my work, "I haven't done anything, so leave me alone."

Rangiku didn't seem convinced or happy with what I just said, so she pressed on, "She misses you captain, can't you see that? Your probably the only one that can cheer her up right now, so go do what you have to do already!"

"What is there that I can do? I already know how she feels about me, so why bother?"

"What do you mean?"

She was really pushing me over the edge right now. It took everything in me to make sure I didn't shout out the complete obvious. Taking a deep breath, I explained everything that happen two weeks ago and I shouldn't go see her. I even told her about how I should stay out of her life for both our sakes. When I finished explaining everything, the look on her face was finally calm, yet still serious.

"Captain, please forgive me for this."

"Forgive you for wha-" I couldn't finish because the next thing I knew, she smacked me across the head, sending flying from the chair. When the hell did she get so strong? I put a hand on my hurting head and glared at her. "What the hell was that for Rangiku?!"

"For being an idiot!" She shouted. Wow, that shut me up. "Whether you like it or not, you need to go talk to her. It obvious that you and Momo need each other so why put her through all this misery? Shes already forgiven you for what you did, she understands that it wasn't your falut. The only person that hasn't forgiven you is yourself. Don't put her through this pain just because you don't have the guts to even tell her how you feel!"

My lieutenant has now surprised me twice today. The first was when she smacked me in the head and just now when she proved that she can say some words of wisdom. She was right though, I had been selfish with this whole proble. I needed to know if what Rangiku said was true and that Momo did miss me.

Getting from the floor, I immediatly ran to the door but before leaving, I turned to my already smiling lieutenant and smirked back, "Thanks Rangiku." Then I was gone.

"Momo! Open the door!"

I knocked several times on Hinamoris office door until she finally opened it with shock written all over her face.

"What are you doing here Captain Hitsugaya? Is there something you need?" She asked, acting as though nothing had happened.

I didn't waste anytime with greetings and I just did whatever my instincts told me to do. Without any warning, I quickly took her in my arms in sudden hug. The impact on her was so surprising that I made her fall backwards on to her bottom with me still holding her on my knees. I guess there was a perk at being shorter than her.

"Momo, stop..please." I burried my face into the curve between her neck and shoulder with my eyes shut tightly, taking every part of her in. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

She didn't move or say anything. I was hoping she was still in shock from the sudden embrace, otherwise, I would have made a complete fool of myself. However, I was relieved when I suddenly fely her arms wrap around my waist to pull me closer to her and soon after, I felt her shaking.

"Shiro...I've missed you."

Hearing her say her nickname for me made my heart flutter, for once. It also made my clouded mind become clear again. I guess, I really needed to hear was her kind voice reaching out to me again. Maybe now, I won't have to much trouble telling her how I felt.

We stayed in that possition for about five minutes before my knees started feeling weak and I pulled myself away from her, but only for a second. After closing the office door, I pulled her to the couch she had in her office so that we could lay together. She made no objections and just followed along with what I did. Momo and I layed on our sides facing each other like we use to when we were kids. This time however felt different, but strangely enough, I really liked it.

Neither of us said anything, we just watched each other closely. Almost like we were waiting for something to happen. Nothing did though, and I took that as my queu to say something.

"Momo..." I began quietly. "I'm so sorry for leaving you all alone lately. Its just been so hard for me to even look at you without thinking about what happen. I know you said you forgive and that it wasn't my fault, but that doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt."

"Shiro.." She put a hand gently on my cheek, surprising me at first, but I melted in to it. "Please don't blame yourself. I know its hard to deal with, I know that I'm still recovering myself, but that doesn't mean that I hate you."

"It doesn't?"

"Of course not."

"Then, why were you so mad at me a couple of weeks ago?" I asked.

She frowned, "I was just upset that you had been avoiding me. I'm sorry if I overreacted."

"Please don't. You have nothing to apoligize for Momo. This is all my fault." I didn't know why, but I suddenly felt tears threatening to fall. I guess I've held them in for so long that its finally coming back to haunt me. I closed my eyes tightly so that she wouldn't see. Gathering all my strength, I continued, "I just couldn't stand the fact that I almost lost you and that I would have been all my fault. I need you Momo, I need you in my life because...because.."

"Toshiro?"

My heart beat so fast that I was so sure that she could feel it. I didn't care though, I just wanted, no, I needed her to know how I felt. I finally opened my eyes to look at her and in the quietest voice, I said, "I love you."

Her eyes widended in shock and she stayed quiet. I wondered if that was a good thing or not, and I immedietly began regretting saying that. However, I got the surprise of my life when she smiled.

"Momo?" I asked, uneasy.

"Toshiro," she whispered, leaning to me. "I love you too."

I didn't have time to respond or even do anything, because the next thing I knew, I felt her warm and soft lips on mine. It was a feeling like no other. I felt my entire body spark and tingle from excitement, while at the same time, I felt frozen in my spot. It was the greatest thing I have ever felt.

Finally breaking from my shock, I closed my eyes and returned the kiss with great passion. At that moment, I didn't care about what I had done or being to weak. I didn't care because I had her, I had my Momo. Her love, her forgiveness, and her first kiss. Which was a bonus.

(Normal POV)

"Captain? You in there?" Rangiku knocked lightly on Momo's office door and when she didn't get an answer, she just decided to let herself in. At first, she didn't see anybody. However, when she suddenly heard a soft sigh on the couch, she almost jump in shock at what she saw.

There laying together was none other than both her captain and his childhood friend. Toshiro had his arms wrapped around Momos waist and had his head resting on her chest, while the young peach girl had her arms around his head, holding him close. They both were asleep with soft smiles on their faces. The scene almost made Rangiku jump and squeal in happiness, but she was able to keep herself calm.

The busty woman smiled and decided to leave the newfound lovers to rest. However, not without taking a few pictures first.

So what did you guys think? :) I know I'm really late at updating and I apoligise a thousand times for it. And to make it up to you guys, I'm going to let you choose the next song I do. Just leave the name and artist in your reviews and I promise you story dedicated to you XD So please, read and review!

Well, thats all the time I have. Until next tine! Ja-Ne! XD

-GoddessOfImagination