Chapter 23-Memories of my father
By: MysticFantasy
.
.
A/N: Warning. Character death in this chapter.
.
The cold air nipped at his face and entered his body but it wasn't enough to make him move from from his spot.
Twelve year old James continued to sit on the snow covered ground as he stared at the snow covered grave and tombstone before him.
His father's name carved into the stone.
The soft sound of the snow crunching under heavy footsteps alerted James that someone was with him. He had an idea who it was since there were very few who were allowed to get this close to the resting place of Captain America.
The large fenced in area had four guards on duty at all times in case someone was actually dumb enough to try to sneak onto the burial site of America's greatest hero. A white iron fence surrounded the grave spot and all around the iron fence were flowers, cards and gifts that people left as a way to show their respect to Captain America.
The fence was as far as any regular citizen could get to the grave and only the Avengers, James, Fury and very select few others could set foot on the ground around the grave.
The new arrival sat down next to him but he didn't take his eyes off the grave.
"Your mother is worried sick trying to find you." Clint said as he looked at the grave of his late friend.
"I know." James said. "But I want to stay a little longer."
"Take your time James." Clint said. "I know it's not easy for you today."
James lightly nodded and gazed up at the large statue that was located a few feet behind the tombstone. A statue that had been masterfully crafted to capture Steve Rogers as he had appeared in the eyes of many.
The statue of the soldier was crafted so that Steve was wearing his first Captain America uniform. Everyone felt that it was the better choice. It was a way for everyone to see how the world's first Avenger and super hero looked when he first became the symbol for hope.
James looked at his father's face that wasn't hidden by the helmet. His father had been ageless when he'd been alive and now this statue was all that James had left as the closest thing to his father being alive.
"James," Clint spoke softly. "I know it's not easy for you. I know that you understand why he did what he did but I think you're still not willing to accept it."
"I accept it." James said as his eyes began to quiver a bit as they were cast to look at the tombstone once more. "I know why he sacrificed himself like that but..."
"You feel like he left you." Clint guessed.
He assumed he guessed right since James lowered his head and tried to keep his sobs from escaping his body.
"James, you know that's the last thing that he wanted to do." Clint said. "You were his greatest treasure."
"Then why did he do it?!" James quietly demanded through a sob. "If I was so important to him, why did he have to leave me?!"
"It's the last thing he wanted."
"But he did it anyway. I know why he did it and I understand that but there could have been another way."
"Your dad always looked for other ways out." Clint said. "Always. But he knew when there wasn't one. He tried to teach that to your Uncle Tony but he never listened. If anyone had been in as many wars and battles as your dad, they would know that."
"It just hurts." James said as he rubbed away his tears.
"I know it does." Clint agreed. "I know that the pain I feel isn't anything compared to what you and your mother feel but it's still there. Your dad was the greatest man I ever knew. I've never known anyone as great as him. I thought he had been faking it at first to try to soften me up for something but when I got to know him I realized that he was all real. He always looked out for us and made sure that we lived to see another day. He was always willing to give his life for any of us. He once told me, he lived a long life and he wanted us to live our lives. Either way, none of us were about to let him give himself up like that. But that was the kind of guy he was."
"But why though?" James asked. "Why was he always so ready to do things like that?"
"Because of the way he was before he became Captain America." Clint answered. "Before he looked like this statue, your dad was as skinny as a pole and weighed only about ninty pounds. Ninty one if he was soaking wet. Little four year olds could beat him up and get away with it. Your dad got beaten so bad almost every day of his life. Not to mention all of his health problems. It was a miracle that he lived long enough to be twenty three years old and get the serum. But he learned something from being the little guy."
"What?" James asked.
"This is what he told me. He said 'Start running, they'll never let you stop. Stand up, push back...Can't say no forever.' He learned to stand up for himself and not always be put down. Something about that allowed him to always know the right thing to do. Along the way, that knowledge just grew more and more inside of him. But he never had the physical ability or chance to do it. Until Doctor Abraham Erskine came along and gave your dad that chance. Because of that one chance, your dad nearly single handedly turned around the events of World War Two and saved thousands of lives. Then in this time, he did it again and again. Saving countless people because it was the right thing to do. He had always wanted to prove himself but no one ever gave him the chance. When he finally got it, he proved to everyone just what the little guy could do. Because of it, he became the greatest hero the Earth has known."
James looked up at the statue of his father.
He knows all too well the stories of the great actions his father had done in his life. He'd seen documentaries, movies, told stories by his parent's, had begged his father to continue telling him stories...
He was amazed by everything his father had done and he felt really honored to be the son of Steve Rogers.
"James, I know that it's hard to accept right now but everything your dad did was because he had a heart of gold and none of us could do anything about it. But you were the greatest thing in his life. He told me all the time that you were his greatest treasure. The reason he kept fighting to make the world a better place."
James continued to look at the statue of his father as he absored everything his uncle had told him.
His father was a hero. He knew that. But it still hurt that he'd chosen to sacrifice himself like that.