A/N: ALL CREDIT FOR THIS GOES TO MY FRIEND ON DRAWCAST! I'm just here rewriting lyrics of Hamilton songs. Also, this Au will be explored with in the future, just because.

Quick background on this Au: Hamilton and Jefferson swap roles, personalities, and heights. And for the sake of keeping Lams, so do Laurens and Madison. We're also thinking about having Angelica and Maria swapped, but I'm not so positive on the idea, even though my friend thinks it's a good idea.

Disclaimer in the first one-shot. If you saw this on the Amino some number of days ago, that's me.

ONE-SHOT 2: Cabinet Battle #1... With a Twist

Summary: It's every Hamilfan's favorite rap battle, but not as you know it.

"Ladies and gentlemen," Washington addressed the members of the Cabinet, "you coulda been anywhere in the world tonight, but you're here with us in New York City. Are you ready for a Cabinet Meeting?" Everyone cheered and whooped with excitement. The very first Cabinet Meeting of the nation! They were all ecstatic to see what would happen.

As they settled down, the President slammed his hands down in front of him. "The issue on the table," he declared loudly. "Secretary Jefferson's plan to assume state debts, and establish a national bank." Said man crossed his arms and smirked proudly. Turning to the Secretary of State, Washington told him, "Secretary Hamilton, you have the floor, sir."

The tall Virginian nodded to him as he stood up. "Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness," he started off, making sure all in the room could hear him. "We fought for these ideals, we shouldn't settle for less. These are wise words, enterprising men quote 'em. Don't act surprised, you guys, cuz I wrote 'em!"

Placing a hand on his hip and motioning towards the Treasury Secretary, Hamilton continued, "Oww, but Jefferson forgets: his plan would have the government assume state debts!" He turned to face everyone else, making sure to emphasize his point. "Now place your bets as to who that benefits: the very seat of government where Jefferson sits."

The immigrant frowned, no longer looking as cocky as before; in fact, he looked pretty irked at this accusation. "Not true!" he retorted.

"Ooh, if the shoe fits, wear it!" Hamilton responded, spinning around to face him. With a smirk, he told the smaller man, "If New York's in debt, why should Virginia bear it?" He shrugged his shoulders in a manner that implied that the answer should be obvious. "Uh, our debts are paid, I'm afraid! Don't tax the South, 'cause we got it made in the shade."

Crossing his arms, he informed Jefferson, "In Virginia, we plant seeds in the ground; we create." He glared slightly at the immigrant. "You just want to move our money around." He stepped closer. "This financial plan is an outrageous demand, and it's too many damn pages for any man to understand!"

Before Jefferson could say anything against that, Hamilton turned to the rest of the Cabinet. "Stand with me in the land of the free!" He placed his hands on his hips as he rolled his eyes. "And pray to God we never see Jefferson's candidacy."

He turned back to Jefferson as he strutted up to him. "Look, when Britain taxed our tea, we got frisky." He took his cane and using the head of it, placed it under the shorter man's chin and gently forced him to look up in his eyes. "Imagine what gon' happen when you try to tax our whiskey," he said with a smirk, ending his argument.

Jefferson glared angrily as the rest of the room became restless with excitement.

"That's my alcohol!" one man angrily shouted above the chaos.

"Thank you, Secretary Hamilton," Washington said loudly, quieting everyone. With an air of confidence, Hamilton high-fived his friend, Laurens, as if he was already sure in his victory of the Cabinet Meeting. Washington turned to his right hand man. "Secretary Jefferson," he addressed him, "your response."

Jefferson stood up, glaring at Hamilton with irritation. "Alex, that was a real nice declaration," he told him. "Welcome to the present, we're running a real nation." He stepped closer. "Would you like to join us? Or stay mellow doing whatever the hell it is you do in Monticello!"

Hamilton's face began to grow red with anger. Crossing his arms, his cockiness back, Jefferson explained why America needed the debt plan.

"If we assume the debts, the Union gets a new line of credit, a financial diuretic. How do you not get it?" He gave Hamilton a look, raising a brow. "If we're aggressive and competitive, the Union gets a boost, you'd rather give it a sedative?"

The room grew a bit louder with murmurs and whispers as he continued to speak. "A civics lesson from a slaver, hey neighbor! Your debts are paid because you don't pay for labor." He turned around for a bit, speaking in a mocking voice. "'We plant seeds in the South; we create.' Yeah, keep ranting." He narrowed his dark eyes in disgust at Hamilton, and spat, "We know who's really doing the planting."

He took another step forward, his giant hair bouncing softly. "And another thing, Mr. Age of Enlightenment, don't lecture me about the war, you didn't fight in it!" He placed his hands on his hips. "You think I'm frightened of you, man? We almost died in a trench!" He threw his hands up for emphasis, then prodded the taller man in the chest with his finger. "While you were off getting high with the French!"

Hamilton gritted his teeth, his face bright red, showing just how livid he was. Jefferson turned to the rest of the room, motioning towards the Virginian. "Alex Hamilton, always hesitant with the President. Reticent, there isn't a plan he doesn't jettison!"

He turned to Laurens, raising his voice a bit. "Laurens, you lower than dirt, son, get your head up here! Damn, can you get worse as you make national debt appear?"

Laurens, though more levelheaded than the two, curled his fists in anger, sending a death glare to Jefferson, who just kept talking. "Sittin' there useless as two shits. Hey, turn around, bend over." He narrowed his eyes at Hamilton as he twirled his finger. "I'll show you where my shoe fits."

That statement got the entire Cabinet riled up. "Excuse me?!" Washington exclaimed amidst the noise. He turned to the two Virginians. "Laurens, Hamilton, take a walk," he told them, then turned to his right hand man, glaring slightly. "Jefferson, take a walk."

Addressing the entire room, the President announced, "We will reconvene after a brief recess." He looked back to the Treasury Secretary. "Jefferson."

"Sir?"

"A word." With that, he walked briskly out of the room. Jefferson stood up to follow after him, but Laurens felt the need to gloat.

"You don't have the votes," he taunted, Hamilton joining in with him.

"You don't have the votes!"

"A-ha-ha, ha-ha!" The tall Virginian laughed, a smirk on his face.

"You're gonna need Congressional approval and you don't have the votes!"

Jefferson growled, wanting so bad to sock them in their stupid Virginian faces and knock the grins off. Instead, he decided against it, following after President Washington, but not before giving them one last glare.

As he exited, Hamilton turned to Laurens. "Such a blunder," he told him, the pride in his voice. "Sometimes it makes me wonder why I even bring the thunder."

"Why he even brings the thunder," Laurens parroted, relieved that the debt plan didn't go through.

Meanwhile, with Washington, Jefferson had to explain himself and his behavior.

"You wanna pull yourself together?" the President asked sternly.

Jefferson sighed before answering, "I'm sorry, these Virginians are birds of a feather."

"Young man, I'm from Virgina, so watch your mouth," Washington warned, giving him a look that told him to be cautious.

"So we let Congress get held hostage by the South?" the immigrant couldn't help but retort.

The Revolutionary War general put his hands together, thinking. "You need the votes," he thought aloud.

"No, we need bold strokes!" Thomas interrupted. "We need this plan-"

"No, you need to convince more folks," Washington cut in.

"But John Laurens won't talk to me," Jefferson complained. "That's a nonstarter."

"Ah, winning was easy, young man," the older man reminded him, "governing's harder."

"They're being intransigent," the Secretary of Treasury argued.

"You have to find a compromise," the President told him.

Jefferson groaned, annoyed at the fact Washington didn't seem to see eye-to-eye with him. "But they don't have a plan, they just hate mine!"

"Convince them otherwise!"

"And sir, what happens if I don't get Confessional approval?"

Washington hesitated before replying, "I imagine they'll call for your removal."

The immigrant gulped nervously. "Sir-" he begged, but he was interrupted.

"Figure it out, Thomas. I'm not asking for you to promise."

Hamilton: Acting like Jefferson? As if!

Jefferson: Acting like Hamilton? Ew.

RG: Shut up, you two, it's called an Au.

Hamilton: Well, I'm just as disappointed in you along with my disgusting counterpart.

RG: I said shut up.

Jefferson: You're asking him to do something that he can't.

Hamilton: wHAT DID YOU SAY YOU ASS?

RG: *over the sounds of the smol angry bi man tackling the tol Virginian* Well, hope you enjoyed that! Those few lines I changed, by the way, I'm ridiculously proud of!

Anyway, the next story won't be very soon, it's still being typed, but I'm hoping to finish it sometime next week!

See ya!