XXVII
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As the next few days passed, the Prince Estate household grew more and more used to having its newest additions. Neville, Luna, and Lavender all found the Estate quite comfortable after getting over the simple fact that Professor Snape owned it.
Lavender and Ron were obviously going through a bit of a rough patch, but they were still inseparable. Neville got along quite well with nearly everyone, especially Luna. As for Luna, she was still the same as always. Sirius thought she was hilarious. Draco always left the room when she entered, especially after one night at dinner when she'd started speaking about his "aura of loneliness."
Neville, Luna, and Lavender were naturally included in the dueling sessions held outside. As the three integrated themselves more into the daily routine at the Estate, some issues were also brought to light. Namely: Hermione's lycanthropy. By about the fifth day of their residence, she was sick of someone mentioning offhandedly – usually Sirius – something about hers and Remus' wolfish tendencies. One night after dinner, while everyone was sitting in the drawing room, Hermione decided to tell Neville, Lavender, and Luna the truth about her lycanthropy.
She explained what had happened- why Lucius Malfoy was a sore subject around the house and why Ginny had been in the Hospital Wing a few weeks before the term ended. She briefly explained what it was like to be a werewolf now, and how she wasn't very different except for a few symptoms around the full moon. Lavender and Neville were stunned silent.
Luna, as always, had a quick and surprisingly perceptive response. "I suspected something was different," the Ravenclaw replied, "especially since you and Professor Lupin are such good friends now."
Hermione was certain she was blushing. Across the room, Remus sat beside Sirius, but his eyes were trained on her. His brow quirked with amusement.
"Thank you, Luna," Hermione replied, giving the girl a truly grateful smile.
Neville and Lavender were shocked, but within a few hours Neville was much more understanding and back to his normal self. Lavender, however, still looked at Hermione days later as if she couldn't quite understand her. It both unnerved and angered Hermione, but after a long conversation with Remus one night, she realized that Lavender would probably be the first of many people who would look at her differently in the future. She had to accept it. At least Lavender wasn't giving her looks of disgust or openly spewing hatred at her. Hermione cried when Remus told her stories about some of the things people had said to him when he was younger.
Several days later, Neville wandered into the greenhouse while Hermione and Remus were inside.
"Oh," he stuttered, "I-I didn't know anyone would be in here."
"It's okay, Neville," Hermione replied, continuing to trim the leaves of the hellebore plant before her. "Come in. Do you want to help us?" Beside her, Remus was moving the milkweed pot to the floor. There was a smear of dirt across his forehead that Hermione couldn't help but smile fondly at.
"Sure," Neville replied, stepping further into the greenhouse. "From the outside you wouldn't expect that this place is being kept up."
"Well," Remus sighed, "you can thank Hermione for that. I just do what she tells me."
"Are you making Wolfsbane?" Neville asked suddenly, glancing around at all the plants. Plenty of them were ingredients in the Wolfsbane potion.
Hermione nodded. "Do you want to help?" She'd been thinking about asking Neville about this for a few days, and last night Remus had told her that it was an excellent idea. "We're actually working on a bit of a project. Maybe you could help with that too."
"I'd love to," Neville exclaimed, looking around the greenhouse as if he felt perfectly, sublimely at home.
"Great," Hermione grinned, beginning to show Neville what plants they had around the greenhouse. "We have about as much aconite as we can grow at once over there," she pointed to the back wall of the greenhouse, "and then here we have our ferns and basic ingredient plants over there," she pointed to the other two walls.
"Is this lovage?" he inquired, fingering the leaves of one of the smaller plants.
Hermione nodded, weighing her options for a moment and then deciding that it was best to just explain everything about their project to Neville.
So she did, telling about her work to trying to alter the Wolfsbane potion, experimenting with ingredients and trying to stop the physical transformation from occurring with the potion. "We've actually been having some trouble with the lovage," she murmured, glancing at Remus and remembering her breakdown last week. "I thought it would work quite perfectly as a substitute for the thistle extract, allowing us to retain some of the brain function abilities while also working on the physical transformation. But it didn't work..."
Neville was still fingering the leaves of the plant. "How did you prepare it?" He sounded almost like Professor Snape, assessing her potion-making abilities. Everyone knew that Neville Longbottom was complete rubbish at Potion Making, so she wondered what he knew about preparing the lovage plant.
"I just added small branch directly to the potion," she supplied quickly, "that's how it's always prepared."
He nodded. "You're probably right, but I'm just thinking… well- never mind. It's probably wrong."
"No!" Hermione blurted, "What is it? We're sort of desperate at this point. I'm willing to try anything."
Neville looked at Remus and Hermione, took a breath, and then spoke. "I read a journal of this Russian Herbologist a few months ago. He was studying Herbology and Potion Making in the Crimean Mountains. Part of his main study in the journal claimed that lovage is the key to many versatile mind-altering potions. It sounds a lot like what you're trying to do here. The difference was that he always said the only way to get the potion to function properly was by dipping chopped lovage root in a strengthening solution, letting it dry out, and then putting it in your potion."
Hermione thought about what he said, eyeing the plant before them. She'd never considered using the root, or doing anything to alter the composition of the root. A strengthening solution. It was genius!
"It might just be stupid," Neville began.
"No," she cut him off, looking to Remus and then back to Neville, "It's brilliant! I think it might work. I have to go get my journal from the lab."
Before Neville or Remus had time to say or do anything else, she was bursting out of the greenhouse, running back into the house and up to Snape's lab to grab her notebook.
When she returned to the lab Remus and Neville were chatting awkwardly, looking uncertain about what was going on until Hermione burst back inside. "What are you waiting for? We have work to do!"
The rest of the day was spent revising all of Hermione's notes and working with Neville's newly offered insight to devise a brand new plan.
Remus was mumbling something. Hermione could hear his quickened breaths and deep, incoherent words. She opened her eyes, turning around in bed and looking at the sleeping man beside her.
He was thrashing lightly under the sheets. Hermione could only make out one word among the slew of incoherent murmuring: her name.
"Hermione," he mumbled, arm reaching out in her direction. His hand brushed against her arm, grasping her wrist and pulling her closer to him. The murmuring continued, her name growing louder on his lips, his voice becoming more and more distressed. Soon he was clutching her arm, pulling her against his frame.
"Remus," she whispered, "wake up."
He stirred, but didn't open his eyes.
"Remus," she repeated, this time picking up her free hand and placing it on the side of his face. When her palm brushed against the prickly skin of his jaw, his eyes opened. The deep, darkened tint of his eyes startled her. He searched her face, looking astonished. His grip on her arm tightening even more. It was almost painful.
Suddenly he pulled her closer, loosening his grip on her arm and hugging her instead. His face buried in her hair and his arms looped her waist. Hermione hesitantly placed her arms around his neck, noting his heavy breathing and racing heartbeat. "What was it?" she inquired after a moment, "you had a dream about something."
He was still wrapped around her. His voice was muffled when he pressed his face against her neck. "I was back in the Forbidden Forest. You- God, Hermione- you were dead."
A sudden painful tightness gripped her chest. However vague his description was, she could clearly see his dream in her mind: she would be dead on the cold ground of the forest, ravaged by a mindless werewolf. Remus would awaken to find her there and taste the tang of her blood in his mouth.
"It's okay," she hummed, running her fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck, "I'm okay."
He let out a ragged breath, warm air brushing against the skin of her neck. "I haven't had that dream in a long time."
She frowned. "You've had it before?"
He nodded, pulling back and meeting her eyes. His were still dark, not the usual bright shade of green. "I used to have it often. Back at Hogwarts… for a while after it happened."
Her chest tightened further. He must have been so miserable. He was so afraid of himself, of what he was capable of. She saw glimpses of that at times like these, in the middle of the night, when he truly opened up to her like this. He was looking into her eyes with such open emotion.
He leaned back into the mattress suddenly, his eyes turning towards the ceiling and his head resting on the pillow. Hermione lay on her side for a moment before sliding forward and curling up beside him.
"I'm sorry that you were so tortured by all of this," she whispered, staring up at the dark ceiling. It was late- probably two or three AM. The half moon would be hanging high in the night sky outside, dimly shining down on the Estate.
"You shouldn't feel bad about it," he said.
"But I do," she replied quickly, "I don't want you to have to feel this way. I don't want you to have to fear yourself."
He let out a quiet breath. Hermione thought about how much she needed to find her cure for Lycanthropy. She needed to finish the potion and she needed to do it soon.
"Thank you, Hermione," he whispered after a long pause. "It's so much better having you here."
A light smile tugged at her lips.
"You don't know how frightening it was to wake up after these dreams at Hogwarts. I'd often wonder if it was real."
"Surely you knew it was just a dream," she cut in.
"Yes, but… they were so vivid. I can't tell you how many times I was tempted to go to your dormitory and make sure you were there."
She chuckled. "That certainly would have been difficult to explain had Evan woken up."
He let out a quiet huff of laughter. "Oh, yes. A distressed werewolf professor pounding on the door of your roommate in the middle of the night would certainly be an interesting sight to see. Still… I used to get up and wander the castle for a few minutes, making sure to pass by your dormitory, trying to ensure your safety."
She smiled sadly, curling into his side further. "Let's go back to sleep. I promised Neville we'd be up bright and early to get to work."
He nodded, tipping his head back and closing his eyes. Hermione fell asleep to the sound of his steady, slowing heartbeat.
Professor Snape looked tired. That was the most coherent observation Hermione could make this morning. She was alone with him in the lab. It was early in the morning, but Neville and Remus would be joining her for work soon. They had to get plenty of work done before the dueling session outside later today.
"Sir?" Hermione intoned, looking over her workstation and the simmering cauldron at Snape.
He had his back to her, facing his own cauldron on the opposite side of the room. His usual black robes showed the tension in the set of his shoulders. "Yes?" he replied.
She fiddled with her stirring rod, trying to figure out how to phrase this without setting him off. He'd been especially irritable lately; she didn't know whether to attribute it to the presence of Neville, Luna, and Lavender, his apparent lack of sleep, or perhaps a sudden irritation with Hermione in general. Either way, she could tell that his position in Voldemort's ranks was a source of great stress for him at the moment.
"I was wondering," she began, "do you really think it's safe to go back the next time he- Voldemort calls you? Someone must be suspicious after everything that happened, right?"
He turned around, not looking at her, and proceeded across the room to one of the ingredient cabinets. His tone was surprisingly calm as he spoke. "That's nothing you need to concern yourself with, Miss Granger."
"But I am concerned," she retorted, "I just can't imagine that you're above suspicion after this. Neville, Luna, and Lavender were all brought to safety only shortly after you were informed of the plan to attack them. How can that not be suspicious?"
He finally looked at her, his expression one of great anger. "I'm not completely helpless, as you seem to think. I'll remind you yet again that I am a Master Legilimens. I can handle myself. Frankly, I'm offended that you think I can't."
Hermione swallowed, allowing her eyes to fall down onto her slowly bubbling cauldron. "Sorry," she muttered after a pause, "I just want you to be careful."
The tension in the room dissipated immediately. Hermione could almost feel the discomfort that oozed out of Snape. From his ashen silence and quick resignation from the conversation, she could tell that the idea of her actually caring for his well-being was shocking to him. It made Hermione very sad, when she thought about how many people had ever possibly told him that they worried about him. Dumbledore, McGonagall, and perhaps one or two others? She didn't know much about Snape's life, but she knew that he was never the type to have close friends. How tragic it was- to think that no one in the world cared about your safety, to think that no one would be sad if you died.
A soft knocking on the door suddenly interrupted Hermione's thoughts. She perked up and started to make her way over to the door. "That'll be Remus and Neville."
Snape spun around to look at her, an absolutely murderous expression on his face. "Longbottom?"
"Yes," she shot back, "and you'd better be nice to him. He's not your student to bully anymore. He's here to help us."
Snape opened his mouth to protest, but Hermione quickly opened the door. Remus' smiling face greeted her, Neville nervously following behind him with a flowerpot and the lovage plant in his arms. "Come in," Hermione motioned for them to follow her back to her workstation.
"I don't want him in my lab," Snape said lowly. His clipped tone was the type that would send any group of first thought seventh years off to do whatever he wanted. But Hermione was having none of that.
"Too bad. He's helping me."
"He ruins every single potion he lays a hand on. I will not have it." The anger was rising in Snape's voice. Hermione could feel Remus and Neville bristle with anxiety.
"He won't even touch the potion. You know by now that I'm the only one who handles the potions. Remus only does what I guide him through, and Neville's just here to deliver some plants and talk us through how to remove the lovage root. It won't work without Neville, so you're just going to have to deal with this." She ended with an air of finality that hopefully rivaled his.
To her surprise, Snape didn't explode into some outburst of anger and kick her out of the lab forever. Instead, he fixed her with a stony glare, which drifted over to Neville, and then Remus. "You should reign in your lioness, Lupin. She's getting absolutely insufferable." With that, the Potions Master stormed over to his table and cauldron.
Hermione blushed. A look at Remus told her that he was just as surprised and embarrassed as her. Neville looked confused, glancing at Remus and then back at Snape and Hermione.
"Right," Hermione breathed, "let's get to work."
Author's Note: Thoughts on this chapter? As always, thanks to everyone for reading, reviewing, following, and adding this story as a favorite!