XXXI

Aftermath

Sirius found Harry pacing his shared room with Ron.

James used to pace. The ever-present voice in the back of Sirius' mind reminded him. Harry seemed to gain more and more qualities like that of his father with each passing day. It was both painful and uplifting to see.

"Harry," Sirius said, knocking lightly on the doorframe.

His godson looked up at him, a concentrated and troubled expression on his face. "Hi, Sirius," he murmured, halting his pacing and sitting down on the edge of his bed.

Sirius closed the door behind him, stepping into the room to sit across from his godson, perched on Ron's bed. "Do you want to talk about what happened?"

He took a deep breath. "You really knew about this?"

"Yes," Sirius said plainly. No point dancing around the truth. "And I approve of it."

Harry furrowed his brow, looking down at the floor. "It didn't ever seem a little strange to you? The two of them together?"

Sirius considered this question for a long moment. Finally he shook his head. "I was confused about it at first. But I saw the change in Remus back at Hogwarts. He was so devastated after what happened to Hermione. It was, in some ways, the worst I've ever seen him." Sirius paused, recalling a few conversations with Remus in his quarters at Hogwarts. He could clearly remember the miserable self-hatred Remus had felt.

"And?" Harry prodded after Sirius fell silent.

"And," Sirius continued, "As he became closer to Hermione. As their friendship developed and he helped her through it all, he became a lot happier. I daresay he's happier than he was before what Malfoy did. Almost as happy as we all were back when we were kids at Hogwarts."

"And Hermione?"

"Well I don't know Hermione as well as you do, but doesn't she seem so much happier? She had a rough couple of months, but now it's almost as if none of it ever even happened. Haven't you seen that change in her?"

Harry nodded, looking up from the ground to meet Sirius' gaze. "I have. She's a lot happier."

"Do you know what else I've noticed?" Sirius leaned forward.

"What?"

"They both have so much more hope," he said softly. "The transformations hardly bother them anymore. They're stronger together."

Harry still looked pensive. Sirius continued, "it's strange and unconventional, Harry. There will certainly be a lot of people that get upset about their relationship because of the age difference or their past. But you need to support Hermione. You're her best friend and you need to trust her judgment. Don't walk away from her."

He shook his head. "I won't- I don't want to walk away from her. Of course I'll support her. I was just… I was angry and confused and after we caught them like that I didn't understand what was going on."

Sirius remembered the sight they'd walked in on. Remus and Hermione snogging like teenagers in the library was certainly not the best way to open up about their relationship to others. "I know," Sirius said placatingly, "and it's okay that you were upset at first, but now you need to talk to her and tell her you support her. Okay?"

Harry sighed. "Yeah. Of course. But… but first I want to talk to Remus."

Sirius couldn't resist the smile that spread across his face. The determined look in Harry's eye was a mirror image to one James had often worn. "Alright. Just… be careful. I don't think Remus is in a good place right now. Perhaps it would be best to wait until tomorrow."

Harry nodded. "Tomorrow."

Her bedroom was cold and drafty tonight. Hermione stepped over Ginny's haphazardly tossed clothes, moving towards her bed. Ginny's bed was empty tonight, and Hermione thought she knew why. Harry and Ginny had recently discovered how romantic the gardens were in the evening. Hermione had an idea of what was happening when she spotted Harry carrying several blankets outside earlier that night.

She sighed, removing her shorts and socks and climbing into bed. Immediately, Crookshanks jumped up onto the bed beside her, curling into her side. Hermione stroked the half-Kneazle's fur softly, thinking about everything that had happened tonight.

Neither Harry nor Ron had spoken to her. Not that Hermione had tried to approach them, that is. She knew Sirius was going to try to explain things to Harry. The boys still needed time. Hermione could wait to speak to them; she had too much on her mind with the approaching full moon anyway.

Remus also hadn't spoken a word to her since his departure from the library. At dinner he barely even looked at her, simply chatting with Sirius the whole time. Hermione desperately wanted to visit his bedroom now that everyone was asleep, but she thought better of it. Remus needed time and space, just like Harry and Ron. She would seek him out soon to talk about what happened, but he needed at least twelve hours, she figured. Or perhaps she should just wait until the full moon tomorrow night…

Her mind was so full of racing thoughts and worries. She shifted about in bed restlessly. Crookshanks had enough of her incessant movements and, with a grumpy hiss, leapt off of Hermione's bed and onto Ginny's. Hermione sighed, staring up at the ceiling and trying to turn her brain off. She couldn't.

Well, she thought, if I'm wide-awake I might as well do something productive.

With that idea, she sat up in bed, sliding out from under the covers and putting some shorts and a jumper on. She left her bedroom quietly, having plenty of practice at avoiding the creaking floorboards in the old house. Slowly, she made her way to the other side of the floor, where Snape's potions lab was located. When she nudged the door open – Snape had adjusted the wards so she and Remus could both enter the lab – she was surprised to see Snape himself standing within the room, hunched over a cauldron.

"Oh," she murmured, "Hello, Professor Snape."

"Granger," he greeted her lowly, eyes still focused on whatever potion he was dutifully stirring, "why are you here so late? Is Lupin finally keeping his distance?"

Hermione frowned at his snide comment. He had no idea of what had happened at the library. His eyes stayed watching her, so she felt the need to reply. "I'm not in the mood for it," she murmured.

An expression overtook his face that she could only describe as mild surprise. Hermione chose to ignore it. "Is there anything you need brewed?" she asked, "I'm waiting for my next batch of Strengthening Solution to mature so I may as well do something else while I wait."

He quirked an eyebrow, "Avoiding the subject, now?" While he said this he opened up one of the cupboards to his left. Within it sat a variety of potion bottles, all of different colors and sizes. "It looks like I'm low on Calming Draught. You can explain what happened today while you brew it."

To say that Hermione was taken aback was an understatement. Was he actually interested in what had happened today? Was he concerned? Or was he simply curious and looking for a bit of gossip? She highly doubted that the latter was true. Nevertheless, perhaps it wasn't that bad to speak to someone about this. She'd only spoke to Ginny for a few minutes, and sometimes, as much as she loved that girl, Ginny's opinions could be a little close-minded and tiresome. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to get all this off her mind and see what Snape had to say.

"What makes you think something happened today?" she asked coolly, moving over to another cupboard and gathering the ingredients she would need for the Calming Draught. She had the recipe memorized by heart, and could check each ingredient off the list in her mind.

"You're obviously distressed and sleepless right now," he replied, methodically stirring the cauldron before him, "and when I entered the room during dinner to deliver the Evening Prophet there was a distinct tension in the room. Especially between yourself, Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley, and Lupin."

Hermione took a deep breath, placing an armful of ingredients on her workstation beside the cauldron. She internally debated telling Snape or not for a solid thirty seconds. Finally, she came to the conclusion that she might as well tell him; after all, she was already fairly certain that he suspected her romantic involvement with Remus. With another deep breath, she began, "Well… you know how Remus and I have grown close recently, right?"

Snape nodded curtly. "More than simply 'close,' I'd say."

Hermione didn't look up at him, chopping up her ingredients one-by-one. "Yes," she muttered, "Er- quite." A blush was rising on her cheeks, she was sure of it. "Well, we had hoped to keep our…. relationship a secret for a while longer. Today Harry and the others found out." The details of how they had found out weren't exactly important – plus she didn't want to describe to Snape how she had experienced such an overpowering need to snog Remus – so she moved on, "and they were upset about it, to say the least."

Snape nodded thoughtfully, urging Hermione to continue. She stuttered through her words, confused at why Snape was being so understanding about this, and taking it all in stride like he'd known all along. "Ron started shouting, of course. We eventually got him to calm down but by that time Harry was storming out of the room. They're both very upset with Remus and myself, but I don't know whether I simply need to give them time or try to talk about this." Hermione took a deep breath, staring down into her cauldron as it began to bubble, "On top of that, Remus has hardly said a word to me since it happened." Her voice sounded choked and tearful. She hated it, and she winced in anticipating of some biting comment from Snape about her weakness.

No biting comment came. Instead, Snape said, with a tone of heavy consideration, "Lupin will certainly come around with time. He's smart enough to realize his mistake in pushing you away. As for Potter and Weasley… they must be much stupider than I initially thought… and I've always believed them to be quite imbecilic."

For some reason, despite the cruelty of the comment, it struck Hermione as extremely funny. She could hold back a small giggle of laughter. Perhaps it was just the amount of stress she was under and the fact that she hadn't smiled all day, but soon she was breaking out into loud laughter, bending over the table and finding tears in her eyes. It was unclear whether they were tears of laughter or something else entirely.

Snape was uncomfortable now. He focused on the potion he was working on, stirring and adding the occasional ingredient. His eyes darted up to her every few seconds, looking at her with a mix of confusion and irritation.

Hermione wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes and calmed her laughter. When she finally fell silent and caught her breath, she felt as if a great weight had been lifted off her chest.

"Are you quite done?" Snape asked, glaring at her in his usual menacing manner.

She nodded, unable to resist the smile that spread across her face. "Sorry. I- I'm not really sure why that was so funny."

He didn't respond, simply going back to his potion making. Hermione silently returned to her potion as well, stirring there times clockwise, then three times counterclockwise, just as the recipe in her mind said.

They must have worked for at least an hour in complete silence. Finally, Snape finished his potion. He put out the flame beneath his cauldron and then began to collect the potion in several different vials and bottles, labeling each methodically. Hermione continued to work as he did this. When he was done, he stepped away from his cauldron, towards the door.

"Don't stay up too late, Hermione," he murmured, hardly loud enough to hear, before closing the door behind him and leaving the lab.

Hermione almost dropped her wand into her potion. She picked her head up and stared at the door Snape had just exited through, a smile growing on her face. Snape had called her Hermione. Not Granger or Miss Granger. Just Hermione.

Despite everything that had happened in the last twenty-four hours, she could at least say that her progressing friendship with Snape – or could she daresay, Severus? – was one bright spot in a truly awful day.

It was earlier than usual that Harry awoke the next morning. He had a lot on his mind, and sleep wasn't coming to him.

The young wizard pulled himself out of bed, slipping downstairs to get his morning coffee and wandering to the back of the house, looking out the window onto the gardens. It was then that Harry noticed a figure standing outside, all the way past the gardens, on the edge of the small pond near the grassy clearing.

Harry studied the figure for a moment as he sipped his coffee. The person was shuffling around on the grass, looking out on the pond and the horizon. When he put his hands in his pockets and slumped his shoulders in quite a familiar way, Harry realized exactly who it was standing out there.

Taking a deep breath, and recognizing that this was his opportunity to start the conversation, Harry stepped outside, slowly making his way towards the man.

Remus noticed Harry quickly, turning to look over his shoulder. Harry gave his former professor a tight-lipped smile as he approached.

"Sirius and I spoke last night," Harry murmured, still gripping his coffee mug in one hand.

Remus had returned his gaze out onto the pond and the rising sun shedding glimmering light onto it. "Yes," he said at last, "I was wondering when you would approach me about it." He didn't look like the Remus Harry had grown used to. There were tired lines on his face, and he gazed ahead with blank sort of expression, as if he was fighting the urge to show any emotion. It was so different to the normal Remus, who had always shown some sort of emotion, or at least concentration and thought.

Harry sipped his coffee. "He told me a lot about you and Hermione... I'm surprised I never suspected anything before."

"Yes," Remus exhaled, "we may have been a bit obvious at times. Another lapse in my judgment, I suppose." His words were bitter.

Harry furrowed his brow. "What do you mean?"

The werewolf turned to look at Harry. "Aren't you here to speak to me about what I did wrong? About the fact that Hermione is still too young? That she doesn't know what she wants?"

"No," Harry said, suddenly very surprised by the angry self-hatred in Remus' eyes. "That-that's not at all what I came here to say…"

Remus swallowed, still wearing a hard frown.

Harry frowned. "Is that what you think? That Hermione's too young and it was all a lapse in judgment?"

Remus looked away, staring down at the rippling water of the pond. His jaw was clenched tightly, as if he was afraid to open his mouth and say something more.

The tickle of irritation within Harry grew into anger. "What, then? Are you going to break it off with her?"

"No, of course not!" Remus blurted, "I just- after what happened yesterday… how everyone reacted…"

"So what?" Harry shouted, "Ron said some cruel things. I took the news badly. That doesn't mean you have to run away with your tail between your legs like this!"

He didn't realize how much he had raised his voice until he stopped shouting. An eerie silence overtook the two men standing on the edge of the pond.

"Don't you see?" Remus whipped his head up to glare at Harry, "That's how everyone's going to react! Many will be much angrier- and for good reason!"

"You know what?" Harry glowered, "Sirius made me realize how much happier you and Hermione have been lately. For a little while I actually though that maybe your relationship was a good thing. But if you're going to be like this and run away at the first frightening thing that happens, then I don't think I could ever support you being with Hermione."

Remus' hard expression fell. He winced, "Harry-"

"No," Harry cut the man off, his tone fierce, "Hermione is too strong, too wonderful, kind, and resilient for you to act like this. If you want to be with her you have to learn to act more like the bloody Gryffindor you are. Because right now you're acting like a coward. She doesn't deserve that."

When Remus didn't say anything, Harry spoke again. "Sort things out with Hermione before I take action and talk to her about this. She may like you a lot, Remus, but that doesn't mean she won't listen to me when I try to urge her to see reason."

With that, Harry turned and strode away, back towards the house. Remus remained standing by the pond for a long time after.

Author's Note: I enjoyed writing Harry in this chapter. Thoughts? I promise that chapter 32 contains some actual Remus/Hermione interaction… what with the full moon and everything...