A/N: Enjoy, bitches.

Da dadadada da da da!

When you sing that do it like they do in fucking Dora when she finds her Spanish speaking mountains and shit and the little cricket and his gang come out and do their thing.

Go back and do it.

Alright.

Since half of you didn't fucking do it, I'll move on.

I was browsing through my old phone memo pad and found a list of clichés that I never got around to.

Whoops.

So my glasses are on and you guys are about to get a….

Birthday Update!

My present to you shall be laughter and since your present to me are reviews because they make me laugh.

Also, feel free to send me One Piece merchandise.

Seriously.

Happy Birthday to me.

Self Inserts:

So, I've recently been reading some good ass SI stories, but apparently, to get to the good you must conquer the fucking depths of hell and stare the devil in his eyes. I am so painfully tired of this:

Title: Life in Death

Summary: When Katherine died some boring ass way because usually these self inserts lived a "normal, uneventful" life or some shit, she was not expecting to be reborn into the Naruto world (Me at home: Well, no fucking shit). Born as Junko,the twin sister of motherfucking Chouji or some shit (because they'll always be someone's fucking twin when born into a clan [cause they're usually born into a fucking clan] in order to have them graduate at the same damn time) she ends up on, of all teams, team fucking 8 which, as a genin cell, probably had the least important role in the entire anime. Oh and no she didn't replace Hinata, they just kinda stuck her on there making it a just a really awkward 4 man genin cell things that, though it probably exists, we will all be very unfamiliar with and have to adapt to because we're not used to that shit. Will she manage to change the course of the future of Naruto world?

Oh.

And did I mention that the fourth Hokage sealed half of the Kyuubi in her for some fucking reason that I will allude to but never reveal cause I can't actually think of a good explanation for that. Lolz.

Me at Home:

Well she damn well shouldn't.

I've also noticed how they are always trying to become master of fuinjustsu. I'm not quite sure why.

Probably to give them some sort of fucking connection to Jiraiya.

And of course there is no chapter without a mention of another facet of the biggest cliché in Naruto Fanfiction.

The aCATsuki:

The part that's in every aCATsuki story, good or bad:

The naming scene.

Holy fucking Jesus Christ of Nazareth.

We just can't go without them can we?

Time to name my fugly ass cats my mom let me adopt to stay in my mansion with me and my crazy best friend and my quiet best friend while she's out of town for five months

Kisame: You're big and blue. I'll call you "Ocean Butterfly Dance On The Moon."

Deidara: I can only see one of your eyes. I'll call you "Dora".

Itachi: Wow you're a really chill and passive cat. "Red Hot Chili Pepper"

Hidan: Wow your fur is sliver. "Weird eyes"

Kakuzu: You have fur that resembles stiches. I'll name you "Scandinavia"

Pein: You seem like leader. I'll fucking name you "Leader" because one of them always has to have a name that's actually fucking appropriate to them in these stories.

Konan: "Princess". It's always fucking princess or some shit.

Tobi: How about "Moose"

Zetsu: "Plant Cat"…Bitch, what.

aCATsuki stories. Shish.

And for my final thought of the day.

I hate it when I follow stories that I fucking hate by the next update.

Then I'm just at home like

Computer: "Watashi no onii-san no namae ha Neji desu: The legend of pan's labrynth's underground dragon scroll: Konoha's raging desert blooming flower dancing wind Princess" has updated a new chapter.

Me: Bitch noooooo. Stoooooppp. I don't like this shit anymore but I'm too lazy to unsubscribe. Ugh, damn it.

Who the fuck uploads everyday anyway?

Advice:

Space them out.

If you upload two chapters people will usually read them and then only review on the second one, whereas if you spaced them out, people could review on both. Get more feedback, unique to the way you wrote in each chapter.

Yes, I have my insightful moments too.

Aiko's Corner:

In case anyone has been wondering where I've been, I have been watching One Piece. I am secretly obsessed with it and so if you ever wanna talk One Piece, I'm your girl. My new favorite anime. It's beautiful.

Stay lovely and bitchy, my lovely bitch brigade.

And remember:

Fuck bitches.

A/N: Review! They're great birthday presents. Also expect more updates :) Yay!