Chapter 38: Sweet Emotion
"HOLD IT! THIRTY MORE SECONDS!"
The last thirty seconds were always the worst.
Raven narrowed her eyes and focused on maintaining the wide, flat shield of energy a few feet in front of her.
"Not today, Raven! Not today!" Cyborg shouted out on the other side of it, slamming another haymaker into the photo negative barrier with all his strength.
Raven's feet slid backward through the sand before she regained her balance. She tried with all her might not to make a sound, but couldn't stop a grunt forcing its way through her teeth. Damn, the man could hit hard.
Cyborg continued his assault on her projection, trying his utmost to smash his way through. Dimly, Raven made out the sound of Starfire yelling out in effort as well, making no effort to hide her strain like Raven did. She was firing a continuous stream of bright green energy from her eyes towards the ocean where it met a wall of water. Aqualad was a hundred feet out from the shore and firing a thick column of water towards the land to meet Starfire's energy blast. The two streams fought back and forth, the point of contact wavering closer and further away from the heroes during the course of the battle. It looked like it was tending to stay closer to Starfire however.
A particularly strong kick crashed into her barrier and a sound like the shattering of a massive pane of thick glass rang out around the beach.
The psychic backlash knocked Raven backward and she landed painfully on her back in the soft sand. She groaned in frustration and soreness.
'That's what I get for being distracted. Oh, here we go…'
Cyborg grinning face appeared above her.
"Booyah baby! Unlucky girl, missed it by 6 seconds!" He held out a hand, looking unbearably smug. Reluctantly, Raven allowed him to pull her up. She wobbled on her feet for a moment before finding her legs.
Cyborg was still grinning obscenely.
"Maybe next time you can go the full five minutes without getting distracted by our resident heart-throb over there." He playfully nudged her shoulder and nodded in the direction of the sea where Aqualad was swimming gracefully and speedily into shore.
Raven felt the same odd defensiveness that came up when Cyborg teased her about Aqualad. "Shut up."
"Oh look here he comes!" Cyborg gushed, clearly enjoying himself. "I wonder how long it takes for him to start on you. I bet five bucks he flexes in your direction aga-Oomph!"
A beam of black energy smacked him on the back of his bald head and the hero wound up with a faceful of sand.
"Cyborg get up. Raven don't injure your teammates."
Robin had arrived and stood a few meters opposite Raven. The rest of the team assembled in a loose circle.
Cyborg clambered to his feet and shot Raven a secret grin which she tried to ignore. 'Dammit, I will pay him back for this.' The good-natured ribbing between the two was a hallmark of their practically brother-sister relationship at this point.
"Good work team." Robin intoned in a flat voice that had become synonymous with his speeches over the past months.
"The competitive static training is yielding promising results. You've all improved in maintaining powers and attacks for extended periods of time. Lapses in concentration, however…" he twisted his neck so his lifeless mask and blank countenance faced Raven directly, "render the training useless. Discipline at all times is a necessity for a hero, I shouldn't have to remind you all of this. Distractions cause deaths."
Raven stared back, her eyes moving along the contours of Robin's mask in a way she was fairly sure he hated. Nothing he could do about it though, it wasn't like she could look him in the eye. He was right of course, she shouldn't have lost to Cyborg. But she wasn't going to acknowledge that.
"Back here at 1900 hours for evening training. Don't be late."
With that, the leader of the Teen Titan's turned on his heel as best he could on the sand of Titan Island beach and headed back towards the tower.
"Man, that guy becomes more and more like Batman every single day," Aqualad said, squeezing the sea water from his long black hair. Raven's eyes followed the motion for a moment before snapping down, hoping beyond hope that Cyborg hadn't caught that. She wished she had her hood and cloak, but an unusually hot November sun had necessitated lighter workout clothes.
"Indeed," said Starfire, staring wistfully at the retreating figure. "However, his hostility has lessened recently. Perhaps this is a good sign?"
"Maybe Star, but no doubt things have gotten better. As long as we keep our focus, right Raven?" Cyborg said with a smirk. He neglected to nudge her this time. He had no desire to eat sand again.
She gave him a warning look and he smiled apologetically.
"What was that you hit me with at the end?" Raven asked, turning and making for the tower as Aqualad and Starfire followed, feet crunching on the sand.
"Been working on my kickboxing," Cyborg said, picking up the pace to walk by Raven's right side. "Can pack quite a lot of force into a front kick now."
"I'll say," Raven muttered, "That came out of nowhere."
"Well, I gotta keep you on your toes, ya know? Been a few days since I managed to break down that shield of yours. Gotta change it up." He lifted up a cybernetic hand and flexed the fingers experimentally. They creaked slightly. "Looks like I'll have to strengthen up the knuckle joints, though. Pounding on that shield for minutes on end heats them up, weakens the structural integrity and makes them susceptible to warping under pressure. Hmm…"
He faded out, no doubt contemplating upgrades and adjustments in his head.
"It is an odd kind of training, isn't it?" Raven asked stepping up the crudely hewn stone steps away from the beach. "We've never done anything like it before and no doubt it's effective but…"
"It can be damn frustrating losing to a teammate?" Cyborg said with a knowing smile, lowering his hand.
It was true. They were heroes, they didn't take losing well. Not when it usually costs lives or put their lives in danger. Losing to each other in such a serious manner was not an entirely welcome feeling.
"It just inspires competition between us," Raven said, thinking of how long it had taken her to get used to battling her friends so directly. Sure they had sparred and worked out together for years, but the brutal and open comparison between their strengths was… not nice. "Opens the door to possible division. It could even be designed for…"
"You don't think?" Cyborg asked incredulously, voice low.
"I don't know," Raven shifted closer to him and dropped her voice as well, "It's a possibility, though, right?"
"Well, if the training is designed to divide us, it's not going to happen." He straightened up and stretched his arms above his head with a sigh. He dropped a wink with a smile, "You love me too much to kill me when I beat you."
Raven gently snorted and shook her head with a smile. He was right. She, Cyborg and Starfire were a tight-knit group now.
"And we're probably being paranoid," he continued. "Our teamwork is the basis of our success. He knows that. He may be a social hermit now, but he's no idiot."
Raven nodded to herself as the four continued making their way up to the tower, following a roughly beaten path through the woods to the island at the center.
'I used to portal straight to my room after every training session.' Raven reflected, studying the pattern of sunlight that had made its way through the leaves to the ground. 'Only problem with that was that Beastboy always wound up at my door ten minutes later to see if I was alright.' She smiled a small smile to herself as she realized that that had eventually become a reason to teleport to her room. Now though, no one came knocking unless Starfire finished her sunbathing early or Cyborg had no project on the go. So she may as well enjoy the time with her friends while she had an excuse to.
"Something funny Raven?"
Raven glanced left toward the smooth voice of Aqualad. His shiny black eyes met hers and she quickly looked away. Suddenly she became acutely aware of her thin, sweat drenched top and workout shorts. It caused an odd, uncomfortable flipping sensation in her stomach.
"Just thinking about how Starfire burnt off your eyebrows the other day," She responded slickly, not quite sure what to make of her sudden feeling of exposure and responding as she always did; with retaliation.
For a moment, she saw and felt his confidence drop like a stone. The man didn't take embarrassment well and he had hidden in his room for days waiting for his eyebrows to grow back after Starfire had accidentally burned them off after winning one of their 'static competition' battles.
"Hahaha, yeah that was pretty funny," he forced out, obviously trying to make light of it. Raven smiled inwardly, satisfied at taking him down a quick notch.
"Got her today though, didn't I Star?"
Starfire floated down from the air to walk alongside Cyborg. "You had the advantage when Robin called an end to the exercise teammate Aqualad, but I was not yet defeated."
Raven shot a look towards her best friend.
It was the strangest thing, but Starfire did not like Aqualad. She didn't actively dislike him from what Raven knew, in fact sometimes she seemed very warm and friendly towards him. But the majority of the time she was decidedly cooler towards him than any other hero, rarely seeking him out or starting conversations. The few times Raven had tried to talk to her about it, Starfire had shrugged it off, saying she was just getting used to him. But Starfire had never needed to 'get used' to anyone before. It was odd. Maybe she felt the same way around him that Raven did? 'Maybe I should raise it again with her?'
"Ah, I think I may have had it this time," Aqualad laughed in a passable attempt at a teasing voice. Evidently he had rallied his self-confidence quickly. "How did you get on?" He addressed Raven again, "Beat him again, I'm sure?"
Raven felt a distinct current of annoyance roll off of Cyborg and reflected that maybe this kind of training wasn't the healthiest thing ever for their relationships. Not with Aqualad's lack of subtlety around anyway.
"I lost actually." She said shortly, eyes on the looming tower before them.
"Oh yeah, is that what Robin was going on about just now. Something about a distraction?" He asked concern written is his face.
Raven felt her stomach warm up. With what she didn't quite know.
"Just a mistake. Lost concentration for a moment and Cy took advantage."
"Ah well, you'll get him next time I'm sure. You sure got the power for it!" he said, shooting her a winning smile, his hair dripping water down his cheeks.
Raven didn't see, however, having already turned back to the tower.
A small frown flitted across Aqualad's face.
The small group soon arrived at the tower.
"Man, is it usually this hot this time of year?" Aqualad asked shielding his eyes and looking up at the crisp blue sky as Cyborg entered the password and combination to open the door in.
Raven turned to answer him.
"Not really, this will be one of the last nice days before Winter sets in."
"Well, it rarely gets this hot in Steel City. Can't say I particularly like it. Don't do well in the sun."
"I thought…" Raven started before trailing off for a moment. Aqualad had lifted the hem of the front of his blue uniform top to mop the sweat and seawater from his face. In doing so, he had revealed the majority of his torso.
You could see the results of super strength.
"…You would love the sun. Coming from Atlantis, I mean," Raven stammered out, feeling that odd heat welling up in her stomach again. Concentrating, she forced the feeling back down into her. She would need to meditate on that further. For now, she just needed to get a hold of herself.
Aqualad finished wiping his face and lowered his shirt to reveal a glowing smile.
"I do prefer the cold," he said with a spark in his eye. "Don't mind being hot once in a while, though."
Raven nodded stiffly once and made her way through the now open door with as much dignity as possible. She ignored the stifled grin of Cyborg as he held out his hand, no doubt expecting five dollars. She made her way quickly into the tower.
And missed the hard-eyed glare of Starfire.
An hour later, Raven flopped onto her bed in some light, comfortable clothing. Her hair was still wrapped in a stark white towel in that mysterious way every single female knows intuitively how to do. She groaned in relief, the warmth of the hot shower still on her skin as she sank into the mattress.
Damn, Cyborg could hit hard.
With a sigh, she pulled herself up into a seated position and idly considered how much work it would be to teleport to the kitchen, flick on the kettle and make some herbal tea. Jasmine sounded divine at the moment.
'Maybe when I feel more awake,' she decided, leaning back against the copious amounts of pillows propped up against the bed's headboard. After a moment, she glanced over at her bedside table and the silver laptop that lay there. With a sigh, she leaned over and picked it up.
Settling back into the pillows, she cradled it on her lap and opened the lid. 'Just a few quick searches.' She said to herself.
With practiced motions, she opened an internet browser and selected a site from her frequently visited pages.
POISON IVY APPEARS ON GORDON'S DOORSTEP!
BATMAN DOES IT AGAIN!
The large title leaped out on the 'Gotham Gazette' website.
Raven eagerly clicked on the link to the main article and quickly read through it.
Nothing.
According to the paper Poison Ivy had been found heavily sedated and in handcuffs on the street in front of the Gotham Police Station only the night before. No other information was readily available except a statement from Commissioner Gordon saying Batman had been responsible.
Disappointed, Raven went through the rest of the Gazette's headlines, even straying into the sports and politics sections hoping for a glimpse. Yet again, nothing.
A few clicks later and she was surfing the front page of the 'Gotham Globe'. Again the story on Poison Ivy dominated. This author however, apparently had more information.
Raven read intently about an inside source that claimed that Ivy had been severely injured after suffering a massive blunt force trauma to the front of her skull, almost crushing her forehead. According to the author, it was rare that Batman delivered a villain to the authorities with such an injury. They continued on, theorizing about a new, more brutal approach to crimefighting from Batman or perhaps it just being a one-off event and Raven quickly lost interest. Gotham newspapers weren't exactly known for their reliable reporting or impartial commentary.
Five minutes of looking later, she admitted defeat. Not that she was really expecting anything.
A least once a week, sometimes more, sometimes less, she would catch up on the Gotham news. She told herself she was just checking to make sure Beastboy hadn't been discovered or had accidentally blown up Wayne Manor. But it was getting onto almost a year now since she had last seen her green friend and it would ease her mind to know he was doing alright.
But she had never come across any mention of him once in all her research into events in Gotham. It was to be expected really. This was Batman, he wouldn't be letting Beastboy out of his sight.
Raven sighed heavily and sank further into her pillows. She should have known not to get her hopes up, but it seemed to happen every single time. She considered checking the official Titan database on her communicator to see if his status had changed but that was more than a long shot.
Instead, she paused for a moment and wrestled with the thought that had just occurred to her. After a moment, she flicked her eyes up to her door, then opened another tab and selected a search engine.
'A-Q-U-A-L-A-D' she typed slowly then hesitated a moment before hitting enter.
First up on the results were a few news stories that featured him, mainly papers based in Jump City and Steel City, 'Aqualad Shows no Signs of Returning to Steel'. Under that was his Wikipedia page (the writing of which was colored a dark purple), his official page on the Titan's website and below that a couple more information related websites. Down Raven scrolled until she came across something that caught her attention.
A fansite.
Feeling that strange warm discomfort in her stomach again, she hovered the cursor over the title, finger poised to press down. For a brief moment, she considered if perhaps he was doing the same thing in his room. He had been paying her an awful lot of attention recently. It had been quite nice really. She pressed down.
SWOOSH!
The door of her bedroom suddenly opened and Raven almost knocked the computer to the floor in flustered surprise. She had a sudden urgent need to close the internet window, which she did quickly before shutting the laptop lid with a snap.
Starfire plodded sluggishly across the soft carpet in bare feet, dressed in pale pink sweat pants and a light cotton shirt. Evidently, she was in a similar mood to Raven as she toppled across the bottom of Raven's bed face first, eyes closed.
Raven shook the embarrassment from her face as best she could and replaced the laptop on the table beside her. "You ever heard of knocking?" she said in as calm a voice as possible.
A string of muffled sounds came from the direction of Starfire's head, her face still buried in the dark purple covers of Raven's bed and her brilliant red hair pooling around her head messily.
Raven smiled at her closest friend's antics. "I'm sorry but were those meant to be words?"
With a groan, the alien rolled reluctantly over, bumping into the bottom of Raven's feet. "I said, I was too tired. I could sleep for a week," she said, punctuating her statement with a jaw-cracking yawn.
"The eye beams really take it out of you, don't they?"
"Yes indeed," Starfire closed her eyes and stretched her hands out above her head, stretching out like a cat until tendons and ligaments could be heard popping. Raven looked on at her accentuated form and idly wondered how many fansites out there were dedicated to her. More than to her anyway.
"My energy beams are solar based as well," She said, rolling over to face Raven on her side. 'They are not effective against water."
"Ah, so that's why you struggle against Aqualad. I should have known now that I think about it. Still, you do well against him given the disadvantage. You drew with him today, didn't you?" Raven asked, picturing him standing proudly on the ocean's surface.
Starfire's face hardened to Raven's surprise.
"Indeed," she said tightly.
Raven regarded her friend with a raised eyebrow, "Something wrong with that?"
Starfire considered Raven for a moment, frowning as her gaze pierced into Raven.
The demi-demoness shifted slightly. "You want to tell me what's going on here, Star?" It had been a long time since the alien girl had looked so serious.
Starfire sighed and pulled herself up to sit cross-legged.
"There is something wrong with that friend Raven. And that is that Aqualad beat me with ease that first two times we battled."
Raven stared at her friend, wondering what she was talking about. "Well that's good, it means you're improving."
Starfire was already shaking her head, "And since then it has been a draw every time."
"Well, what's wrong with that?" Raven asked feeling slightly exasperated. "And that's not true," she said as a thought occurred to her, "You won a few weeks ago. You almost burnt his face off," she said with a slight edge.
Starfire smiled, a dark and mischievous spark in her eye.
"That is true, I did," she said, dark smirk firmly in place as she explained. "After the second or third draw, I asked him why he was holding back in our duels. He denied that he was," she said with flinty eyes. Raven was reminded of the fact that Starfire was a battle hardened warrior princess and wouldn't take kindly to anyone going easy on her.
"In the following two battles I gradually decreased the amount of power I was putting into my beams. And yet still he did not win. During the middle of the next one, I surprised him with my full power and his water couldn't protect him in time."
She smiled viciously as Raven gaped.
"Since then he has not given me any chance to get near him and I can go all out."
Raven was speechless. She hurriedly tried to sort out what it all meant. One thing seemed to stick though.
"You could have killed him!" She said accusingly.
Now Tamaraneans are beings of emotions. They are constantly feeling something, be it happiness, sorrow, or anger. And they are quick to swing between such emotions wildly. It was something Raven had become, for the most part, accustomed to over the years. But sometimes it still caught her by surprise.
"And he would have deserved it!" Starfire replied with heat, green energy lighting up her eyes as her face twisted in anger. "I will not be disrespected by any opponent! Especially when he is playing with my best friend's emotions and trying to take advantage of her!" She finished with a shout.
Raven blinked.
Starfire froze, the green fire fading from her eyes rapidly as she realized what she had said.
"What-" Raven said before swallowing. "What are you talking about?"
Starfire sighed wearily and unclenched her fists before looking at Raven apologetically. "Forgive me, I had intended to break this to you in a more…calm way."
"Break what to me? What do you mean, take advantage?" Raven asked nervously, leaning backward.
Starfire closed her eyes for a moment before shuffling closer to her friend.
"You have noticed Aqualad has been paying you more attention recently?" She started softly.
Raven swallowed dryly again before nodding, embarrassed.
"And he has been paying you compliments and…posing," she said with a sour look on her face.
Raven felt her stomach heat up again and she shifted awkwardly but didn't say anything.
"And you have also noticed," Starfire continued, taking a deep breath, "How gracefully he swims and how he squeezes the water from his hair."
Raven's face lit up red as she looked up in surprise. Cyborg hadn't noticed, but Starfire had?
She looked in confusion at the soft smile on Starfire's face, feeling unbelievably confused.
"Star-What…what are you saying?" She managed to get out.
Starfire shifted closer eagerly, laying a hand on Raven's leg. "It means Raven, that you are…opening up. Growing up."
"You're…" Raven stuttered, eyes going wide. "You're saying I'm…"
"Going through the same thing I did when I left Earth to undergo my Tamaranean Transformation. You are maturing, as I did."
Raven looked thunderstruck.
"Oh my dearest friend, do not look so down!" Starfire leaped up to capture her teammate in a massive hug. "This is delightful! Wondrous! Soon we will be able to have real girl talk and help each other and- Oh I am so happy for you!"
Raven hesitantly returned the hug for a moment, suddenly keenly aware of just how lucky she was to have such a friend as Starfire.
Didn't mean she liked what she was saying though. The signs were obvious now that she thought about it. She had gone through two uniform size adjustments in the past 9 months. It was probably just her standard control of her emotions that had pushed this back so long.
Hell.
She slowly pulled away from Starfire's embrace. One thing at a time.
"Star, what are you talking about with Aqualad though?"
The alien princess leaned back against the headboard beside Raven, face grim and downcast.
"Do you recall the party we attended a few months ago commemorating our victory over the Brotherhood of Evil?"
"Yes, in Steel City."
Starfire continued on, fiddling with a pillow and seeming somewhat abashed. "Well after you retired for the evening I approached Bumblebee for some…advice on Aqualad."
Raven looked puzzled. "What do you mean?"
"Well, I was wondering if he had a…a girlfriend."
Raven's mouth dropped open.
"You what?"
Starfire shrugged, obviously trying to play it off as no big deal but blushing madly.
"He is very attractive and I was…I was trying to move on past…"
There was silence for a moment as she trailed off.
This time it was Raven's turn to lean over and hug her best friend. The fire had really gone out of Starfire during Robin's social withdrawal from the team. The girl had placed an enormous amount of hope and trust in him and having him turn so cold and distant had- exacted a heavy toll on her. It had taken many nights of talking and crying and the help of both Raven and Cyborg to get her back on track.
Raven smiled inwardly as she held her friend, glad she was making such great progress.
"So what did Bumblebee say?" asked Raven, changing the subject and withdrawing from the embrace. There was a limit after all.
"Friend Bumblebee replied with 'Which one?' According to her Aqualad has a habit of pursuing multiple females at one time. Other sources confirmed her statement and I quickly lost interest. I have no desire whatsoever to be one of many."
A sudden empty hollowness seemed to open up inside of Raven's stomach. It got colder and darker when she made the connection to what Starfire had been talking about earlier.
"You mean that while he was paying attention to me, he was doing more than just throwing his matches with you?"
Starfire looked grave. "He has been sending me at least three direct messages a day on our communicators. And has asked me to swim with him on multiple occasions."
The cavern grew wider up into Raven's chest.
"But I thought…I thought…he was…" she forced out.
"Interested in you? There is no doubt he was and is, but I am sorry to say that you are not the only one. Bumblebee also said that he enjoys flustering and teasing his fans and on this point, I am afraid you were an especially easy target. I am sorry."
"And you knew? You knew this whole time and never told me?" Raven said accusingly, hurt flashing in her eyes. Only her intimate knowledge of Starfire's inherently kind nature and their history stopped her throwing the alien out of her room. Or worse.
"Oh, you must forgive me Raven! But I did what I thought was necessary!"
"Necessary?! Necessary for me to feel like this? This-this…emptiness and disappointment?" She replied with heat. Flashes of onyx black energy started appearing around the room.
"Calm friend Raven, stay calm and focus on the feelings inside. I am sure you will find them to not be as powerful or damaging as you imagine. Please, let us meditate for a moment."
Reluctantly, Raven adopted the standard lotus position next to her friend and hesitantly closed her eyes and slowed her breathing.
She confronted and tamed the influx of negative emotion with practiced skill. She had, after all, been doing it her whole life. The emptiness was harder to shift, but the strong, steady light of peace and love emanating from Starfire next to her seemed to breath fresh security and peace into her.
'I really need to let her take me shopping or something after this.' Raven reflected, opening her eyes.
"Better?"
"Better."
"Good," said Starfire, "Now let me explain."
Raven relaxed back against her headboard again but kept her eyes firmly on the Tamaranean.
Starfire met her gaze, "You have a history of repressing your emotions friend Raven. I was determined when I first noticed your curiosity in Aqualad that nothing would stop these feelings from progressing. So I said nothing and did enough to attract his attention so that he would not focus on you entirely."
"Attract his attention?" Raven spluttered in disbelief.
Starfire giggled despite the situation. "Oh don't look at me with such eyes Raven. It does not require much to attract the attention of males. I just did my solar recharging in places I knew he could see and brushed against him during spars along with other small things like laughing at his jokes or complimenting him."
"You…you-"
Starfire burst out laughing. "Oh, I do so enjoy being the one that can do the teaching for once." She said reverting back to her old language habits in her mirth as she wiped a tear away from her eye.
"So you…distracted him so he wouldn't focus on me?"
Starfire sobered, "Yes. A developing heart is not to be played with. I measured his attention to you seriously. I had no desire to see you fall for him. Just for your emotions to be aroused."
"Star…"
"And now they have been!" Starfire exclaimed, clapping her hands together in her familiar girlish glee. "I was worried that after Malchior you had buried all romantic feeling within you, but now it has risen again! However Aqualad-"
"What?" Raven cut across, "How do you know about Malchior?"
Starfire paused.
"We fought him together Raven, do you not remember?" Starfire asked, face drawn in confusion.
"Of course I remember." Raven narrowed her eyes at her red-faced friend. "I also remember that nobody knew that I had even spoken to him. Nobody but-" her eyes flashed. "I cannot believe Beastboy told you!" A pillow ripped clean in two between them.
"Calm down friend Raven, calm down!" Starfire exclaimed, hand waving. "His intentions were good! He said he wanted someone else closer to you than he was to know about your experience so they could help you. He also made me promise not to tell anyone about it."
The black fringe around Raven's fists faded.
"He…he asked you to help me?"
Starfire smiled softly, remembering Beastboy practically begging her to go and comfort Raven after she locked herself in her room. It was an endearing memory.
"Friend Beastboy was concerned about you and confessed to not knowing how to help, so he asked me to instead."
Raven blinked again, trying to process the information. It did seem like a very Beastboy thing to do. Hardly surprising really.
"That…that was nice of him," she said, just have something to say.
Starfire's smile widened.
"But no friend Raven, as I was saying Aqualad is not a good place to start with relationships. He may be handsome, but he also knows it."
Raven shook her head and focused.
"He does, doesn't he? What happened to him? Remember when we first met him and he seems so…innocent and noble?
"Not to mention attractive?" Starfire laughed.
"Well…yes… that too," Raven said, a light heat forming on her cheeks that was becoming entirely too familiar.
"That was a long time ago friend Raven, some years now. He grew up, I suppose," Starfire said slightly melancholically. "Realised that girls found him attractive and….changed."
Raven smirked for a moment as she thought back. "I remember feeling that he was uncomfortable with our attention."
"It was rather charming." Starfire chuckled, "And now he is the one making others feel uncomfortable."
Again that hollowness rose up in Raven again as she remembered that the boy she thought had liked her also liked and was pursuing others.
"Don't be distressed Raven," Starfire said kindly, laying a hand on Raven's knee. "He is just your first interest. Others will come along."
'…and how many of them will be interested in me back?…'
"What about you?" Raven said, shifting on the bed, "What other schemes for boyfriends have you been up to? And I can't believe you didn't tell me any of this."
"It would have done you no good, friend Raven. Except make you uncomfortable and perhaps even push you further away from your naturally growing feelings."
Raven grudgingly gave her that. If Starfire had started talking about how smooth and silky Aqualad's hair looked even a few months ago, she would have had no idea what she was on about.
She did now though.
"But, aside from enquiring about Aqualad, I have not made many attempts at finding love. I feel I am still finding myself after Robin now."
Raven nodded, thinking about how she much trouble she had had moving on after Malchior and how shallow their relationship had been compared to Starfire and Robin's.
"Things are unstable here as well," Starfire continued, "I would like my family to be healed before adding new members to it."
"You really think that's going to happen?" Raven asked with a raised eyebrow, "Robin is distancing himself from us more and more every day."
Starfire shook her head, "I agree, hope for Robin is something I had to give up. No, it is Beastboy who I am eager to bring back into our family." Her face fell. "He was so different the night he left us. So angry and pained. Many times have I prayed to X'Hal for his soul's safety. I look forward to the day I see him smile again."
It was true. Raven could feel Starfire's sincerity pulse out from her. And she felt the same way. Maybe she should tell Star about her visit to Wayne Manor? She would have to think further on that.
"It won't be long now, Star. Soon he'll be back and… well actually everything won't go back to normal, but it will be better."
Starfire snuggled down into Raven's pillows and wondered what Raven would do if she fell asleep. She decided to give it a try.
"That it will be friend Raven. But I have faith Beastboy will bring with him the Titan spirit we have been missing. Beastboy never changes."
Raven watched as her friend's eyes drooped. She was about to smack her around the head and tell her to stop faking falling asleep, but she was struck by Starfire's words.
She was right again. Beastboy had been the same year in, year out since the Titans had formed. The steady rock of happiness and optimism throughout Cyborg's falling out with Robin, Robin's Red-X fiasco, her own issue with Trigon and Starfire's intergalactic incidents with Tamaran and the Gordanians.
He was a known quantity, a reliable factor. Things would be more normal and familiar with him pulling stupid pranks in the tower when he got back.
Aqualad may have changed over the years.
But Beastboy wouldn't change like him.
He would come back with a few new tricks, maybe with a bit of muscle on him, his Beast problem hopefully solved. But the same, immature, fun loving Beastboy as usual.
It was a comforting thought.
Yet also...
Indecipherably dispiriting.
Wheyyyy.
That was different, wasn't it?
I enjoyed writing this chapter, but it was quite a bit of a challenge.
I'm a guy. Thus I have no idea how late teen, early tween girls talk to each other in private. Not the best base to try to write about superpowered, emotionally driven late teen, early tween girls talking to each other in private about burgeoning feelings and guys.
I hope I did alright.
Anyway, I really feel like Starfire is often an undervalued character in BBRae fics. She gets tons of focus in RobStar fics (I'm assuming, I don't think I've ever actually read one. Potential recommendations?), but is often neglected otherwise.
I like her. I think she's a great combination of badassery and naivety.
So I thought I'd use her a bit.
Anyway, there we have it - a bit of an update on Tower life.
Guhhhhhh...
Review Responses:
Anonymous. MISTER ANONYMOUS - Nice, it was difficult getting down the layout. Yep, Batman doesn't do things by half, he goes to the extreme first. As for the height, Beastboy was always the short one of the group and since my story is set in the future a bit, the rest of the titans have grown up a bit and he has remained pretty much the same. You're actually not far off in some of those predictions as well mate :)
FattySkeleton - He really is, isn't he? And Batman...well he's going to react to the situation the way I think he actually would. Probs not what you think though.
iamking - Thanks for the correction mate! I went back and fixed it a few hours after your review!
ThommyPickles - That's what I was hoping man, Batman knows, he knows! Good to know it worked alright, i did have some doubts but there you have it. Well, there's the titans, back to Beastboy next time.
FF8cerberus - Batman is interested in results. And he will do what he thinks is necessary to get those results. It's a dangerous power to give to someone and the thing with Batman is that he demands it. He is the definition of cold and calculating mate. It's who he is. The thing is, he's usually right. Is he right in this situation? Will there be consequences for this down the line? Who knows?
Dark Azarathian - Haha, I'm glad! Thank you for the well wishes! Have a happy St. Paddy's Day!
There you have it guys 'n gals. Until next time. Shouldn't be long.
CJB