Sorry for a slow update, bust week! But here's chapter five. Thank you for all your honest opinions and thoughts. I love reading them :) enjoy

Rose

Grabbing the books out of my locker for my next class, it took everything within me not to look where Dimitri was standing by his locker. Two weeks had gone by since he had snuck into my room and we ended up half shouting at one another before he just left.

He had never been one to get deep and emotional. Way back when we were so close, it was only rare occasions he poured his heart out but I always treasured those moments. Even if I had been feisty back then I always a good girl in everyones eyes. I was the chubby sweet girl that people really didn't get why Dimitri was with all the time.

Seeing Dimitri with his arm around Meredith was like a slap in the face. Her being a size 6 make me want to throw up. He always said he never thought much about my weight, he loved me anyway. Yet I cannot help but think that every girl I had seen him with since I came back was thin as a fucking stick. I thought curves was in fashion?

Sighing I leaned my forehead against the cold metal door. I wasn't one for body shaming, we all have insecurities, hell even Lissa who's pretty much a Victoria Secret Model was conscious about her own things. Nobody's perfect I guess.

It didn't stop me from wanting to punch Meredith in the face, but still. I think I can control myself.

My phone beeped, waking me up from my thoughts, it was Lissa telling me to meet her in class as she had been running late from her previous class. She had been a god send ever since I came back. She kept me busy, always kept me updated and it was just like the good old days with her.

Closing my locker I dreaded passing Dimitri and his little clique he had going. The past two weeks shit had literarily just gotten worse. He either ignored me completely or he was being very verbal of what he thought of me or what I was wearing.

I ignored it, I wasn't going to sink to his level.

Walking past them I could hear snickers, I kept my gaze firm in the direction I was going, when I could see in the corner of my eyes Dimitri moving backwards and elbowing me in the side, 'accidentally' pushing me over as my books fell to the floor.

Looking up moving the hair out of my face Dimitri was looking down on me with a brow slightly raised as if he had no clue what just happened. Dick head.

Shrugging he said a simple "Oops, my bad, Come on Mere" he said taking her hand as they started to make their way down the hall.

Anger pulsed through my veins and before I could think further I was grabbing one of my books off of the floor getting onto my feet, throwing it perfectly hitting him hard in the back.

He spun around quickly staring at the book on the floor realising what had hit him, looking up he was shooting daggers at me roaring, "What the fuck Rose?" as he was rubbing the spot where I hit him.

Shrugging briefly i put on an innocent face and said, "Oops, my bad"

You could hear snickers down the hall, I was quite proud of my quick response.

"You have fucking metal issues" He growled kicking the book my way. I caught it with my foot, "At least I'm not the one acting like a royal asshole" I said under my breath before bending over to pick up my book.

By the time I was straightening up there he was, catching me off guard, making me drop the books again, as he backed me up against the lockers behind me. Placing a hand on the lockers behind me, he pointed a finger at me as he spat, "You better be fucking careful Rose, I don't play with shit like that. I'm not the old Dimitri you use to know, so you better watch it"

"You just accidentally push girls over, oh what a gentleman" I said ironically shooting him a fake dreamy smile.

Hitting the lockers behind me with his fist, the bang made me jump as he said, "For fucks sake Rose! Drop the bloody attitude and show some fucking respect" he hissed, "Or do you even know what that means? Because you clearly don't show enough for yourself" he said, his voice low for only my ears. He chuckles satanically before he says "I mean just look at you, could you be more desperate in that tight ass skirt? Is it cause you've lost weight you feel like you have to show off?" He asks his gaze firm on mine. My lips forms a tight line as I hold back whatever if building up within me. He knew he was pushing every weak button I had. "Or is it the fact that you feel like you have to because I'm now fucking a size 6?" He snickers sardonically

"You're disgusting" I whisper trying to have authority but fail.

"And yet you want me" he said leaning in, "You want me so fucking bad. You think I don't see it when you're eyeing me up all day everyday. I still got you wrapped tight around my little finger, never forget Rose" his lips are right by my ear now. "Nobody will ever fuck you like I can" His hand is on my hip as he gently squeezes it. I close my eyes moving my face away from his as he chuckles.

Suddenly he's gone and I'm alone feeling stripped naked of my emotions as the corridor empties and the bell rings.

Picking my books up I hurry down the hall to class.

I hate him, I hate him so much. Deep down I know my hate is running on the Love that I still feel for him. Hate is passion, good or not, I will always feel something for him, no matter what I want to feel.

You never forget your high school sweetheart right?

If you could, I would.

"Did he really say that?" The look on Lissa's face was twisted with disgust, as she stopped straightening her hair to meet my gaze.

Shrugging I sighed, "We piss each other off royally"

"Still that's, that's no excuse" Viktoria said as she came over to help me with my make up. "He's been an ass ever since you left, you've thrown him off even more when you came back"

"So it is my fault?" I asked feeling a bit unsure. Yes I hurt him and I give him that, we didn't part on great terms and I could have definitely done things differently, but it wasn't like I came back with a boyfriend to rub in his face? Instead he's being nastier than ever and works his best magic to make me feels shit about myself and still want him. What is it with guys and doing that?

"Why don't we stop talking about him, tonight is girls night!" Tasha said as she passed around glasses of wine. "Now let's get you sexy as fuck and find you someone to keep him off of your mind" she winked and I rolled my eyes but couldn't help but smile. She was right. Why could he do whatever he wanted and me stay put?

"Sounds like a plan" I said as I closed my eyes letting Viktoria work her magic on me. "So Lissa, How's Christian?" I asked in a way that I knew would make her blush.

Looking at her from the corner of my eye I knew I was right as she was trying to cover her blush, "He's good, why?"

"I just never see him around that often" I shrugged.

"Oh he's around when we're not there" Tasha grinned, "You should just know the nasty things I've heard when I went around her place once, I got there early and they were definitely getting down and dirty-"

"Did you know that Tasha has slept with almost Twenty five different dudes?" Lissa interrupted Tasha while shooting her glares.

I strangled a chuckle, "Really?" while looking at her. She shrugged playing it cool, "A girl got needs"

"Oh please" Viktoria, "I got needs and I still haven't slept with every bartender at the Red!"

"No, you only sleep with Ivan every now and again behind Dimitri's back" Tasha snapped back teasingly as Viktoria's jaw dropped before she threw one of the of the pillows getting a pretty good hit as it hit Tasha's face. She laughed, "Oops, did I say that out loud?"

"You told me you wouldn't tell anyone" Viktoria accused glaring at her playfully.

"Please Vika, that's as much of a secret as that Rose lost her virginity in the middle of a field" Lissa said rolling her eyes.

"Lissa!" I gasped as Tasha said, "Yeah that's true"

"You really had sex in a field?" Viktoria said then looking at me weirdly.

"It's probably one of the most normal places she's had sex in by now" Lissa continued as if this conversation was normal.

"Fuck's sake Liss!" I said throwing a pillow so hard she fell off of her chair with a shriek.

Tasha laughed, "It's true tho"

"Well judging by numbers I think you're a bit more of a slut than I am" I laughed as Tasha was having some wine still wearing her grin.

"You're all sluts!" I could hear Lissa grin as I turned to her as she was getting off of the floor brushing herself off "But Anyway, I've got your outfit planned already Rose, you'll look killer! Tasha what are you wearing?"

The conversation went on as we were helping one another to look our best. Lissa could be such a dictator when it came to fashion, although she did have impeccable taste.

When we got in the taxi I couldn't help but gape at how freaking good Viktoria looked. She was wearing this cool back velvet 90's dress, platform heels and a choker, Tasha was looking flawless in a purple number with a cool strappy detail all over her back. Lissa, as always, was in pink. She was wearing these jeans that were like a second skin and this sexy lacy pink top. Her heels made me want to sit down, she's already tall and she walks in these ridiculous heels. Shaking my head the taxi stopped outside The Red.

Lissa had personally chosen this simple, yet skin tight black dress that showed quite a bit of cleavage. Putting a 90's twist I was wearing a jean shirt, rolled up sleeves and tied it under my bust, still giving a good view but making it slightly more modest. A pair of heels to finish it all off and my signature gold hoops of course.

I had brought a bottle of vodka in my bag, tilting my head back I took a big sip before passing it to Tasha. She chuckled in surprise but just shrugged before taking a swig. Running a hand through my hair I followed Lissa as she made her way around the queue. I loved how confident she'd gotten while I was away, before she didn't make a complaint about anything. This Lissa was still sophisticated but she had an edge, I love it!

Stepping inside Viktoria winked at me before disappearing to the bar to get our first round. She was worse than I am these days, she knew how to let loose. "Panda" was blaring through the speakers as we were downing our first shots. You could tell Lissa was on a mission tonight because before I had put my glass down she ordered more. She knew when I didn't want to think about anything else but what was now. She could always read me like the back of her hand.

Clinking out glasses together we downed another round before Viktoria pulled us all out on the dance floor. It was crowded, bodies moving, bumping together. Lissa started singing on top of her lungs as Ne-Yo was filling the room.

Tasha had made her way towards the DJ booth. Lissa had told me she had a little crush apparently, so we probably wouldn't see more of her tonight. I laughed as Lissa and Viktoria started dancing together looking absolutely ridiculous.

Over their shoulders a pair of eyes caught me. I didn't recognise him but he had a cute smile and he sent me a wink. Looking away I felt a bit awkward. I hadn't really flirted with anyone but in a club in London. I knew the reason why.

"He's cute!" Lissa shouted over the music close to my ear. I grinned, I knew she would pick up on it. "He's here every now and again, a one night stand kind of guy, a real flirt. Cute butt" she warned.

"So exactly what I'm looking for" I teased meeting her gaze. "I'm not leaving with anyone tonight Liss apart from you"

"But a little friendly grinding doesn't hurt" she winked as I laughed. She was right, in that moment I didn't really see what was stopping me. That was until I felt his gaze on me.

It was just his presence as I felt his gaze stray along my body. Telling myself not to, I looked over my shoulder, meeting his gaze head on. His gaze was dark he was taking me in from afar.

He was wearing a pair of fitted jeans and a fitted shirt with rolled up sleeves. The two top buttons were undone leaving a small view on his perfectly chiselled chest. He took a long swig on his beer before I saw him lick his lips slowly. Forcing my eyes away from him I could feel myself getting hot in places I'd wished he lick instead of his lips.

"You ok?" Viktoria asked taking my hands as I was standing still in the middle of the crowded dance floor. I nodded before giving her a smile, in that moment I made a decision. Catching her gaze I nodded the opposite direction of Dimitri towards the guy who was eyeing me up earlier. "What do you think?"

She chuckled, "I think you deserve a good night!"

"Sure you don't mind?" I asked. I knew she had always rooted for Dimitri and I, and for some reason it felt like she still was.

"He's being a complete ass Rose, unless he gets his shit together, I'm not rooting for the two of you. I'm being honest, if he doesn't treat you like you deserve that fuck him!"

I had never heard her say stuff like that about her brother before. I know they're tight, so I would never ever want to come between them, but I also know that he's very protective of her. So I can see why she is rebelling against him.

"Go!" She laughed when I hesitated. Turning, I walked towards where I last saw him. I felt bit stupid but as I make my way through the crowd I couldn't see him anymore. Running a hand through my hair nervously, I looked around to see if I could catch his gaze again. He had like sandy blonde hair and an average fit body, but his smile was killer from what I remember. Plus Lissa said he had a cute butt.

Then I felt a pair of hands on my hips and pair of lips in my ear, "Wanna dance babe?"

Turning in his arms, I grinned, it was him. "You any good?" I teased as I didn't want to see too easy. I was quite a good flirt if I can say so myself, I learned a thing or two at the London scene.

He huffed before rolling his eyes keeping the grin on his lips, "The question is are you any good?"

I rolled my eyes as I walked towards the centre of the dance floor. His hands stayed put on my hips as he stayed close. Pulling me close to him, I started dancing to the music. Nelly Furtado, Justin Timberlake and Timbaland helping me get into the beat.

His hands stayed on my hips as I lifted my hands up into my hair as my body was moving. You know that sexy side of you that always comes out when you've have a couple of drinks and you feel real good about yourself? I was there now as his guy was breathing down my neck as I started grinding on him. I wasn't even surprised when I felt him grow against my ass. I wasn't squatting three times a week for nothing!

They were mainly playing songs that were popular a couple of years ago, which I absolutely loved. They switched it up with some current tunes as I was lip singing to Keri Hilson.

As he was moving his arms around my waist I placed mine of top of his as I was leaning my head back against his chest. I felt his lips find the naked space at the base of my neck. At first it felt so good, he was pressing himself against me and for the first time in weeks I wasn't thinking of Dimitri.

I grinned as his lips moved up my neck, his hands teasing as it was squeezing my hips. Opening my eyes my smile dropped.

Not far away, he stood with his glare glued right on me. I didn't want to, but I felt horrible as my stomach dropped. Seeing the way his lips were tense, how his gaze had murder written murder all over it as his fists were clenched. I couldn't help but think that I was the one doing something wrong.

The guy, I hadn't even asked his name, stopped dancing behind me as he asked, "Are you Ok?"

I just nodded in response not able to speak as my eyes was still glued to Dimitri. I almost expected him to just come across the room and tear us apart, just do whatever the fuck he wanted. The guys lips were still in my ear as he said, "Want a drink?"

Tearing my eyes away from Dimitri's, I turned so I could look him instead of Dimitri, shaking me head quickly I said, "No, sorry, uh I have to go"

"You sure?" he asked before nodding towards the door, cupping my chin "We could get out of here"

Still being able to see Dimitri in the corner of my eye, I licked my lips trying to think. Slowly, he was leaning in, testing the waters. But it felt wrong. I think I have too much fucking conciseness to kiss another guy in front of Dimitri. In another country it felt easier, it was my way to try and forget.

But now, I couldn't

Moving away I turned without saying a word, keeping my eyes on the floor not wanting to see the satisfaction on Dimitri's gaze as he was probably happy with his success in my weakness for him.

Stopping at the bar I asked for a shot, downing it within a few seconds. I felt fucking furious with myself. Why do I let him do this? I thought I had learned enough over the last few weeks being back, all that time I spent building up my self esteem, going to the gym, working on myself, to have it all thrown away because of him?

Turning around I ran hand through my hair, I need Liss. Scanning the room I searched hard trying to find her, instead my eyes were caught by someone else. My froze as I felt a shudder run through me.

We had switched places.

He was standing on the dance floor, eyes locked with mine as he was cupping Camille's chin. Seeing the look in his eyes, I knew what he was doing. I felt tears starting to sting in my eyes, with a evil glint in his eyes he winked at me before he lowered his lips onto hers.

I felt sick. My stomach was turning as he opening his eyes, looking straight at me as she was completely sucking on his fucking face. Shaking my head slowly, it felt like the room was closing in on me.

Feeling like my chest was closing up, I hurried for the doors. It was like I had handed him the gun loaded and he had fired without second thought. I was chipping for air as I need to get space between us.

I need air. I need to get out!

thoughts? :)

Much Love xx