Authors Note: GUYS! Thank you so much for all the love of my last chapter! And I'm only 3 away from 100 followers :)
I realise my grammar in the last chapter was horrendous – so this time, I'll try to be better!

Again as of late it has taken me hours to write this chapter, my focus is all over the place. I think I get too into the music I am listening too… oops.

Chapter 14 – Anger

"A strong woman who recklessly throws away her strength, she is worse than a weak woman who has never had any strength to throw away."
I am nose deep in my book. I'm sprawled on the sofa in my library, my feet hanging off of the edge. I am on week 6 since being released from hospital and I have not stepped in to my work building once, to Mr controllings delight. Hannah has faxed me and emailed me things over but it's not the same as being in your own building
I am starting to get bored however. I have re-read all of my favourite books and again have started my Thomas Hardy addiction.
Christian has mainly worked from home these past few weeks but every now and then he has to go into the office and that makes him feel guilty.
I think I have spent 95% of my time rolling my eyes at him. I'm never fully alone. If it's not Mrs Jones asking me if I am okay, I'll see one of the many security boys walk by or pop there head in when they think I am not looking.
I am not entirely sure what they think I am going to be doing when half of my body was battered but I guess it gives Christian peace of mind.
I kick my legs over from the arm of the sofa and slide on my slipper booties. I am dressed in sweats and one of Christian's tee-shirts. I've pretty much been living in these items of clothing, nothing like the mogul wife I should be.
I place my hand on my bump. It's official and I now cannot hide it from anyone. Our baby is apparently the size of an orange – Christian informed me on that one, he has been reading baby books and it makes me heart swoon.
I make my way down stairs through the kitchen and head towards Christian's office. I knock on the door and walk inside.
Christian, sat in his casual clothes looking like the adonis of all men is currently chatting away on his phone, unaware I am in the room with him. He is facing towards the window looking out on the Seattle skyline. I tip toe over and place my hand in hair and he turns to my contact.
His eyes are soft when he realises it was me. He grabs me and pulls me into his lap and places a kiss on the top of my head.
"And where are her whereabouts? Really? I want her brought to me. Talk to Taylor. I want answers. Yes. Yes. Thanks Barney, excellent work"
My body shivers. I bet I can take 1 guess to what that was about.
Christian looks at me and I arch my eyebrow. He sighs in response.
"We found that woman. The nurse". I swallow. I feel some what relieved that she isn't out there, even though she is not my biggest threat. He however – he needs to be found so as possible.
"Oh" Was all I could respond.
"Her name is Sadie Frazier and she lives in Savannah – funnily enough. She's a 22 year old drop out and her connection to Morton isn't visible yet". My heart halts to a stop. I know that name. I swear I went to school with her before I moved back to Ray – but why was she doing this? What did I ever do to her and if I remember correctly – nothing.
"I went to school with her. I think. I knew I recognized her voice but I didn't know where from".
Christian picks up his phone and proceeds to tell Barney or Welch – who knew, about this added information.
"I'm going to talk to her. Once I've gotten the green light from Taylor, is that okay Anastasia?" Shouldn't I be the one doing the talking? This girl seems to have an issue with me so shouldn't I be doing all of the digging?
"I want to come too. I want to know, why now and why me?" I notice Christian's face changes emotion and he's angry. Of fucking course.
"I don't want you there Ana, it's too dangerous".
"Christian, if she wanted to hurt me – should could have in the hospital. I was unguarded around her, remember? Please Christian – I need this"
He takes a deep breath and places his two fingers over the bridge of his nose – eyes shut. I can tell it's taking every ounce of emotion to even think about letting me do this.
His bright gray eyes look at mine alert and wide. I feel my breath hitch, succumbed to his beauty.

"I'm staying with you at all times" he speaks and I nod in agreement. Anything to keep fifty happy.
He shifts in his chair so I slide off of his lap and stand. He holds out his hand and I place mine in his, he guides me to the kitchen where lunch has just been prepared. Mrs Jones serves us grilled chicken, potatoes and salad. My mouth waters at the smell, she gives me a sweet smile and returns to her room.
I dig in to my food and each bite makes me want to moan in pleasure. God Mrs Jones, you are one fantastic cook.
"I got a call from Dr Crowe earlier" I start "and she has arranged the next scan for next Monday" I say as I pop another tomato in my mouth.
"Okay. I'll make sure I have that in my schedule" It bothers me that he doesn't sound excited. It's the big scan. The one where we find out if it's a boy or a girl.
"You know it's where we find out if we are having a son or a daughter" I push.
"yes, I know" he replies as he continues to eat his chicken. I frown, he has been excited about everything involving the baby and now he seems really disconnected and uninterested almost.
"Are you not excited?" I ask, a little hurt by his responses.
"Don't be silly Anastasia. Of course I am". Oh dear, I am Anastasia – that means he is mad at me. But why? Christ I cannot keep up with his emotions and they say pregnant woman are more hormonal.
"Okay.. Are you sure you are alright?"
"I'm fine. Everything is clearly fucking fine" and he starts to shout. I was confused as of 10 minutes ago he was cuddling me and kissing my forehead in his study.
I go to say something but am stopped as he smashes his plate in to the sink. Little shards fly everywhere. I gasp as he made me jump. His eyes were almost black and for the first time, I felt really scared. He didn't look like fifty for a few minutes. Christian grabbed his cell from the counter and stormed upstairs.
Funnily enough my appetite has just left the room with him and I'm sat fiddling with little pieces of lettuce around my plate. I try not cry but I am so confused and shocked that the tears roll down my cheeks.
I place my plate on the side trying to avoid all the shattered china – I wonder what Gail is going to think about this. I don't know where Christian has gone but I don't want to be near him right now. I decide to head back to my study and get lost in something that isn't my life.

I lay back on my sofa and think about a couple of weekends ago when we told Ray that he were going to be a grandfather. I smile at the memories, he was ecstatic and gave me the biggest hug of all. I know Ray is going to be such a good grandfather to my little trooper, and I can't wait to watch them bond. I haven't even told my mom yet, Ray did ask why not but once we informed him of what was going on – his feelings towards my mom changed a little.
After all these years I have never once told Ray why I wanted to move to his when I were younger and he respected my decision to not share. Once I told him though, he was on Christian's side about killing Morton. My dad now nearly phones everyday checking in on me or on Christian to find out any news.
I think about how my life has changed so much already but it still has even begun on new changes, these thoughts cloud my head until my eyes give in and I find myself in the land of Z's.

I am awoke by my phone buzzing violently on the table next to me. My email alarm keeps going off and I look down to see I have an email from my grumpy husband.

From: Christian Grey
Subject: Want to play a game?
Date: September 27 2012 17:23

To: Anastasia Grey

Playroom. 5 minutes. You know what I expect.

I am waiting.

Christian Grey

My insides squirm. We haven't been in the playroom since we found out that I were pregnant. Christian hasn't wanted too but I am kind of scared to agree right now.
I don't know whether to reply or just head up there. I feel so anxious.

From: Anastasia Grey
Subject: Do I?
Date: September 27 2012 17:25
To: Christian Grey

Are you mad at me?
I don't want to go in there if you are mad at me.

Anastasia Grey

I wait and I wait and it's gone 5 minutes and I don't have a response. Oh shit. I gather my thoughts and make my way to the playroom. The butterflies in my stomach must be doing replay laps around blip cause I can't shake this nervousness.

I take a deep breath and open the door. He isn't in here but I know it's cause he is waiting for me to be the doting submissive. I strip out of my clothes but leave my pants on. I place my clothes on the chair and grab the hair tie from the pocket of my sweats. I plait my hair down the side and kneel in the position sir wants.
I look down and notice that my bump really sticks out over my thighs when I am knelt. I smile a little but then I hear foot steps from down the corridor. My heart races awaiting what is come. He opens the door and shut it immediately behind him. I look up quickly from under my eyelashes and see his feet. Ugh, I never knew someones feet could make me feel this way, but Christian's definitely do. I remain still and try to focus on my breathing. He walks past me and goes to his draws and opens them. I hear him fiddle around with somethings then slide the door shut. I gulp in response.
"Stand" he says and I make my way up from the floor, trying to be more graceful than normal.
"Come" he says and I walk over to him and stand in front. I look at him in the eyes and I can't work out his expression or emotion.
"You are so beautiful Ana, you know that?" and I see him pull out the infamous flogger from his jean back pocket.
"You have such flawless skin, I could kiss every inch of it". He speaks to me as he guides the leather over my skin – it leaves a trail of goosebumps everywhere it goes. He is extra gentle when going over my bump which I am grateful for.
"You are looking so lovely, especially that bump of yours, Ana. It shows that you are mine, only you". He continues around and around my body, trailing sensual lines over my skin.
"Bend down on the end of the bed" he commands and I do as I am told.
He places the flogger by my head and his hands guide their way down my back towards my ass. He flicks his thumb under the cotton of my pants and starts to pull them down my long legs, leaving me exposed from behind.
He swats my ass with his hand and it makes me jump. I feel him rubbing slow circles after the little blow.
"I am not going to hurt you Ana. But I am a frustrated man. So, the safe words – what are they?"
I gulp
"Yellow and Red" I squeak out not knowing what he is going to do.
"Good. Now go stand over there" and he points to the shackled wall. He grabs my arms and puts each in the shackles on the wall and does the same to my legs. I am completely exposed, open and not in any control and I know that's how fifty likes me.
Christian stares at me and if I could I would put my hands in front of my body.
"Ana, you are so beautiful. Strapped up and unable to move" he closes his eyes "You are a vision, an angel sent down from heaven gifted for only me".
I don't say anything, I just hang there, feeling too hot and bothered. I want him to touch me, to put his hands all over my body and show me that he loves me.
I can feel how wet and ready I am for my husband – but he doesn't touch me, only with the flogger.
He flicks and licks my skin with the brown leather and each time I let out a moan.
"Please" I let out and he flicks my side again
"Sh" he replies and I try to keep quiet.
He heads over to the draws again and grabs something small and walks back over to me. I wonder if he is going to untie me but he doesn't. The cuffs are starting to dig into my skin and it feels strange.
Christian holds the small thing in his hand and does a twist and I hear it vibrate.
OH, I see where he is going with this.
He places the small vibrator against my clit and it drives me insane. The power from something so small is unexpected. I wriggle and pull on the restraints. The feeling is unbearable.
"Oh please, sir. Please" I pant and I know that he knows I want him touch me but he doesn't. The build up is huge and I can feel myself readying to orgasm but he withdraws the vibrator and leaves me confused.
What, no why. That build up fades away and I sag slightly. I am panting like I have just ran a marathon, then he puts the vibrator back onto my clit. This time it feels even more sensitive. Oh wow. This is different and each time I go to orgasm he stops.
Then it clicks, that he is doing this to prove a point. He is frustrated about something and he is taking it out on me.
Again and again he puts the vibrator to me and stops – each time I shake with the build up that wasn't allowed to be released. We have been here before but this feels somewhat worse. He isn't going to let you come Ana – you know this. I don't feel sad I feel disappointed, that he has gone back to this way of thinking. I wish he'd talk to me rather than deny me something.
I feel myself getting more sleepier by the second and I know my body cannot take much more of the withdrawal.
"Red" And he drops the tool straight away, his hands finding the shackles and undoing each buckle. He goes to lift me but I merely walk around him and sit on the bed. My wrists and ankles have red marks around them where I pulled against the restraints so hard. I frown, I should have stayed in my room.
Christian sits next to me in silence.
"I'm sorry" he finally speaks and I don't even know what to respond to him. I am too tired.
"I don't know what came over me. I just needed some control Ana. I feel so out of control recently. I don't want you hurt or scared and I can't seem to take control over that. Someone is trying to get to you again and again I can't stop it. I'm trying but I feel so useless. I just wanted to come back to something I had control in".
"I get it Christian, I do. But you can't control other people to the extent of protecting me. You didn't know Morton was planning this. Some things are just out of your control Christian". I yawn.
"I'm sorry I took it out on you. I'm glad I can trust you to stop me when I get too much. God, I love you Mrs Grey. You are sensational" He kisses my head and pulls me under the covers. I lay in his arms, my head under his chin, his hands stroke my back and it feels heavenly.
"I want to make love to you, can I Ana? I need you. I need you to know I am sorry".
I peek up from under his chin and kiss his lips. Yes, I want that too. Our kiss grows intensely and his hands are all over my body. He pulls me on top of him and I can feel his smile against my lips. I feel his erection under my ass cheeks and I know he is ready too. I push myself up and lift my ass so I can guide Christian into me. I watch him as I slowly let him sink into me and his eyes roll back into his head. This feels incredible. I slowly move up and down, letting myself find the rhythm I want.
"Oh god. Yes Ana, yes" he says and his hands are on my hips, holding me down so he can get deeper inside of me.
Fuck, this feels so good. This, this is what I wanted.
"Let go Ana" and his words do me over and I orgasm shakily around him. All the teasing has made this such an intense orgasm that after Christian lets go to, I am still shaking when led next to him.
"That was" I start but I don't think I can finish.
"I love you" he says and I roll on to my side and place his hand on my belly.
"We love you too" and is answering smile is dazzling.

Authors note: Until next time! I know, I just wanted to add something else in this story so why not some orgasm denial right? We All know Christian is bipolar with his moods so I played on that.
Anyway – next chapter is a 20 week scan and a gender reveal as well as a meeting with Miss Sadie Frazier. Who is this girl? …. I did try and erase all the grammar but c'mon guys, I can't be perfect.