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Rose

Emptying that first drink, as sad as it may sound, felt great. And that second and then third was even better. I finally felt a but cheerful. I know that turning to alcohol to forget is wrong, I've heard enough Macklemore song's to know better and what it does to you. But right now, right now it felt so fucking great.

Pouring my fourth drink I didn't even care about measurements or ice or limes anymore, I just wanted to fill my glass. Rihanna filled the room and I felt like one of those girls at the club who screams when their fave song comes on as they squeal "This is my Jam!"

This whiskey got me Feelin pretty

So pardon if I'm impolite

I just really need your ass with me

I'm sorry 'bout the other night

And I know I could be more creative

And come up with poetic lines

But I'm turnt up upstairs and I love you

Is the only thing that's in my mind

I was singing on top of my lungs with my drink in hand. I felt on top of the world as I closed my eyes and continued to sing as loud as I could,

You take me higher

Higher than I've ever been babe

Just come over let's pour a drink babe

I hope I ain't calling you too late

Too late

You're like my fire

Let's stay up late and smoke a jay

I wanna go back to the old way

But I'm drunk instead with a full ash tray

With a little bit too much to say

It was like every word hit home.

God I love him, so damn fucking much. God I'm such a bitch for treating him like this. I stumbled over to the kitchen counter again as I poured more gin into my half empty glass. This was really all Lissa's fault. All she needed to do was to listen to me, if she really had listen I'm sure she would have gotten it, I know Tasha and Viktoria would have too. Hell I don't even know why they're so upset anymore? Do they really think I did this to hurt them? To be mean and break their trust?

I was shaking my head, silently shaking my head at my own internal conversation. Jessie J came on with Nobody's Perfect and I felt like my phone was having incredible shuffle timing because every song that came on was like it knew what I was feeling.

Downing the rest of my drink I raised my glass to every true word that was consuming me from the speakers. Hell I know I'm not perfect, but how can she not forgive me? Nobody is perfect, so how can she expect me to? Neither of them has even fucking tried to hear me out or to talk to me. What kind of fucking friends do I have? I'd never ever intentionally hurt them, don't they know that? Don't they know me?

Anger was slowly sparking within, mixing deep thoughts with alcohol wasn't a good idea, but I was too far gone to even think of stopping now.

I was even talking to myself, or I think I was, I was speaking aloud anywho, "And do you know what hurts the most?" I stumbled a little as I side stepped spilling some tonic on the floor as I forgot to out the lid on the bottle. Shrugging I didn't care as I took a sip of my newly poured drink. "The worst thing is that after all this shit I'm going through with my friends, is that I have to see the fucking whore with her hands on him, on my Dimitri" Shaking my head as if I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "And the fact that I know he's fucked her" I was gesturing wildly with my hands as I spoke into nothing, "I know nothing happened but that image is dangerous man"

I could feel the tears starting to burn in my eyes again. I had been avoiding crying for a few hours now and I was doing to well but that all went out the window now. "It's not about the fact that I don't trust him, I do, I love him more than life itself! But the fact that I had no one to turn to after that? I couldn't talk to Dimitri, because all I could see was her and her skanky ass having out. I had to drag her out of the place before I ripped her to pieces or pushed her down the stairs hoping to severely damage her fucking face"

The image flashed in front of me and I was instantly drinking as tears escaped down my cheeks. Grabbing my phone I finished I don't know what number of drink I was on as I leaned against the nearest wall. Trying to put my now empty glass down I missed the window sill and it fell to the floor. Looking down onto my hands I clenched my fists together, my hands were so cold. I could barely feel my finger tips.

Blinking I could feel tears falling freely as I slowly slid down against the wall. Numbness took over me but the tears didn't stop falling as I rested my head against the wall. Feeling uncomfortable I removed my phone from my back pocket pressing the home button accidentally. Was is ten o'clock already? I hadn't even noticed the sun setting.

My eyes moved to Dimitri's unopened texts as I frowned. He hadn't texted me for hours now, I don't know how I'd gotten so lost in time nor for how many hours I had been drinking but I did notice that my phone had been silent for a very long time.

Opening the texts I knew he had messaged frequently nearly once every hour for two days straight and the last text I received was over four, almost five hours ago. Had he given up? That knot returned for the first time since I started drinking.

Was he jut giving me space? Or was he tired of waiting?

I was suddenly itching to see him. Where was he? Would he come by again? Should I just call him? but calling him wouldn't be the same as actually seeing him.

I just wanted to touch him, to pull him into my arms and have him make it all go away. He could always make everything better. Fuck Camille, she had nothing to do with us!

Wiping my tears with the back of my hand I sniffled as I made a poor effort to try to push myself off of the floor. Second attempt when better as I finally found myself on my own two feet.

Reaching for my keys I knew I would get to him so much faster if I took the car and the sooner I was in his arms the better. I'm not sure if I even turned off the music when I locked up and got into the car.

But I was going to see him and apologise for my shitty behaviour, hopefully he was going to make it better. He always did.

Dimitri

I felt relieve for the first time in two days. We had all ended up sitting down talking through all of it. Lissa spoke her mind freely and I let her know every detail that she needed to get over what ever resentment she said she was feeling.

She had kept going on about the fact that it was about Rose lying, and the fact that she thought the two of us wasn't a good idea, which I already knew. but after explaining every single detail to her, after reassuring her that she was just as wrong as Rose was lying to her face I think it all finally fell into place. There might have been a moment where I shouted at her to "Grow the fuck up, I got past all the shit Rose and I'd gone through, so why couldn't she?"

There had been some tears and for the first time I didn't want to punch Ivan as he was cuddling my sister.

Tasha had a grim look on her face as she was shaking her head, "I just can't believe Camille would do something that like that, that she actually had the balls to just appear thinking you'd fuck her?"

"It's disgusting!" Viktoria "If I ever see her again at school I will-"

"I've already taken care of it" I said cooly, I didn't like talking or even thinking of her. "She won't be bothering us again, don't worry"

"To be honest, I don't even want to know what you've done or said to her, but I'm glad to hear it" Lissa said with a timid smile, it disappeared quickly as she spoke again, "Have you heard from Rose at all?"

"It's been radio silence for over two days now" I said grimly shaking my head. I'd left my phone on charge in my room as I just kept checking it and it was driving me insane.

"I'm sure she'll come around tomorrow, I'll text her now if you want?"

"Sure" I breathed, "Anything to get her attention and any kind of correspondence from you will be a step forward"

Lissa typed something quickly before she locked her phone, "I still think we all so go see her tomorrow"

"Agreed" Tasha nodded and Christian took her hand giving it a reassuring squeeze.

I gave her half a smile, I was praying that she would open the door tomorrow. I don't know if I could do another day like this.

Sighing I wanted to check my phone, but I didn't want to see yet another no reply screen. It was late, hopefully she was asleep. This talk had taken much longer than I thought it would, I was planning on making another trip to her house, but I'm glad this happened now. I'm glad they have all come around and that we were all friends again. Finally.

I really like that we agreed would all go over first thing in the morning, I think it would be good for her to see all of us together and I'm sure she missed us just as much as we missed her.

Because god knows I fucking miss her.

Rose

Turning up the music once again I was driving through the back roads to get to Dimitri's. It would be less traffic so hopefully it was going to get me there quicker.

My fingers were itching for him, two days was two long. Hell any time away from him is too long and I've had enough with all this bullshit.

Blinking hard I felt strange. It was a mix of tiredness and feeling like I was on an absolute high. Full of energy and dead on my feet at the same time, but the music was keeping me going.

I kept pushing the pedal a little closer to the floor each passing minute as I was repeating the same thing over and over,

"I just have to see Dimitri, I just have to see Dimitri"

Then it all would be fine. Right?

Turning again I was looking around and nothing looked familiar. Why did nothing look familiar? I've driven this way a thousand times but there were tree's every where and barely any road signs.

Reaching for my phone I was going to bring maps up when the car suddenly veered over and I shrieked as I hurried to put both hands back on the wheel again. My heart was pounding as I felt a bit out of breath from the small scare.

Gripping the wheel I could barely feel my finger tips, they were completely numb.

A cold feeling came all over me and I knew exactly why they were numb. It was like a cold shower as realisation hit me.

"What the hell am I doing?" I said under my breath.

I shouldn't be doing this, I don't even know how much alcohol I have in my body. Shaking my head I tried to focus on the road. Why the hell am I driving?

"I need to stop"

I don't know who I'm speaking to but I start looking around for a place to stop. I don't know where I am, I can barely focus-

My phone went off and my eyes instantly went to it. I gasped as I reached for it.

Lissa

Picking it up and unlocking it I was about to read when I felt the car veer over again. Looking up there was suddenly something in the middle of the road but I couldn't see what, my eyes were blurry from the sudden change of light.

"Shit!"

Dropping the phone I grabbed the wheel and veered off it the opposite direction so I wouldn't hit it, but I didn't see the steep hill on the other side of the road.

My stomach dropped as it felt like the car had suddenly taken control. The car drove up the hill, with the speed I was keeping it was like the ground had disappeared from beneath me.

Screaming, I was suddenly up side down. As the top of the car hit the ground, the noise was screeching and piercing in my ears, as the car continued to roll, I hit my head against the car ceiling, I heard glass breaking and metal cracking.

Then it all went black.

Pain.

Gasping, I was suddenly awake.

Pain shooting up my right arm and my shoulder, breathing hard, it was like my lungs were burning, as if someone was clawing at the from the inside.

I was upside down. When it suddenly dawned on me I tried to grasp onto the sides to keep the seatbelt from digging into me, but my right arm was intact. Screaming out in pain I gasped for air as tears were filling my eyes.

I tried to look around but my neck was soar. What happened?

As soon as I asked myself the question it came back to me like a mental slap in the face. Flashes of the car rolling around hit me as I blinked and it felt like the air was knocked out of my lungs.

Still in my seat, the seatbelt was the only thing that held me in place, I knew I needed to get down. I must have blacked out and I have no idea for how long. It was dark and it was cold.

Forcing my legs forward I placed the against the dashboard, before I could think it through I reached for the seatbelt button. My legs weren't strong enough to keep me up and my left arm along weren't prepared.

Landing I felt something sharp dig into my thigh and side. Sobbing the pain was all over, I felt so hazy I didn't even know where I was. Looking around I couldn't see my purse or my phone.

The drivers seat door was wide open as the doorframe was digging into me. Coughing I could taste the blood in my mouth.

I didn't even know what I was doing as I was dragging myself out of the car, with the only support I had being my left arm. Being nearly out I felt something sharp dig deep into my hip as I cried out.

"Fuck" I breathed as tears were spilling from my eyes. My left arm collapsed from under me, falling onto my back.

Trying to slow down my breathing as the tears fell there was a ringing in my ears. It had been constant since I woken back up. Sobbing I closed my eyes as I was shaking my head slowly.

I'm so god damn stupid! So fucking stupid.

Crying harder I gasped for air again and my lungs were burning.

Trying to slow down my breathing, the ringing was slowly fading away. All I could hear was my short gasps for air between my sniffles. Then there was something else.

Music.

I recognised the lyrics as the airy voice was lowly filling the air.

Heaven couldn't wait for you.

The radio must still be working as my playlist must have kept going. It was surprisingly calming.

Opening my eyes, I was met by darkness. Blinking a few times there was something else.

Stars.

Thousands and thousands of them.

It was beautiful, in a painful and sad kind of way. It was only me and the stars.

Looking to my side all I could see my darkness, looking down slightly my eyes landed on what I quickly recognised as my phone. The sudden in take of air was like a hard punch in my stomach. Thank god it was on my left so I could reach for it.

My fingers were still numb as I curled my fingers around it, tears started to fall again but I think they were happy ones. I could call for help.

Quickly pressing Dimitri's name I smiled as I heard the dial tone. My pulse increased as I knew this was coming to an end.

My brows came together as his voicemail picked up. Hanging up I called him again. The knot pulled in my stomach as I went to voicemail again.

Having up I dialled him again.

And Again, and again.

Tears were filling my eyes, spilling over as started to sob while shaking my head. "No" I sniffled, dealing again but voicemail. "No!" I cried out.

Why isn't he answering? My whole body was growing cold. Had he had enough? He always had his phone handy.

"Why?" I cried as the pain was consuming me. Both mental and physical pain.

My parents were away, it wasn't to any use to call them. I couldn't call my friends, they wouldn't answer anyway.

Crying harder, I felt cold.

Suddenly a name came to mind. I couldn't find it at first but as I did I pressed her name.

The dial picked up as I sniffled, trying to compose myself. Then she picked up,

"Hi Rose honey, How are you? I haven't seen you in over a week! That is far too long my darling. I made your favourite cake today, if you have time tomorrow you should definitely come over and have some with your favourite ice tea"

Hearing her warm tone almost made me want to laugh. She was so good, so damn good to me. I've dreamed and always wanted to be like her.

But I never would be.

Not acting like this, as realisation hit me, sadness washed over me as I sobbed.

I could hear some shuffling as Olena spoke again, "Rose? Honey are you there?"

Tears were rolling down my cheeks, "I-I don't know what to-to do" My voice was breaking as I spoke. I felt helpless.

"Rose what happened? Where are you?" she asked urgency in her voice.

Breathing slowly I shook my head as I didn't want to admit it, but I had to, "I did something s-stupid"

"Are you hurt Rose? Where are you calling me from? Is Dimitri with you?" Worry was suddenly dripping from Olena's voice.

"Everything hurts" I sobbed as I cried harder. "E-everything hurts so much"

"Where are you sweetie? You have to tell me and I'll come and help you"

She was so much like Dimitri, I knew he'd gotten it from her. Never wasting time, just springing into action.

"I don't know where I am" I whispered as I tried to look around. It was too dark to see anything. "I got lost and then-" Groaning something dug into me again that made me want to scream out in pain, but I stopped myself. "I'm so sorry, I'm s-so sorry"

I heard Olena shuffling about, calling out something before she spoke to me again, "It's ok Rose, Where you driving honey?"

"Ye-yes"

"Where were you heading to?"

"Just want to see him, I-I" I cried, " I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-" crying out as I'd put pressure on my right arm without realising.

"Call Dimitri!" I heard Olena snap in the background.

Hearing his name made me stop, and all I could see was the stars again.

"Rose, honey you have to stay with me ok? Where are you?"

All the questions were just starting to blur. I'm not sure If I was speaking aloud or just lost in my own thoughts. I think I was on the country roads? The back roads with all the tree's and narrow roads. There were barely any road signs.

Olena said something but I didn't understand it.

The cold was taking over.

All I heard now was stars and the music again. I couldn't feel my fingers. I couldn't feel anything.

Then it all went black.

You guys know I love a good cliffhanger. But I am sorry because I hate them too at the same time. I will update again this weekend so the suspense won't be long.

Just so you all know, I do not support drinking and driving but it was the curve the story has taken. Rose has been under a lot of pressure under a very short period of time. Nobody to turn to and images can really fuck with your mind.

I welcome all reviews and whatever you think please let me know :)

Lot's of Love xx