The good thing about being cooped up in the house with Katniss is that I haven't actually seen the reconstruction of the District. There was so much destruction but they have rebuilt it into something even more amazing. Still, I feel Katniss's heart race as we walk through town and I know she's thinking of the sacrifices that were made. We all lost something. We lost a lot, actually. I feel like I have never had the chance to properly mourn my family. I remember them telling me, back in 13, but everything was so mixed up and I had even lost myself during that time. I guess I sort of grieved in the Capitol, when Aurelius was caring for me. But still, I was thinking of Katniss and how I would react to seeing her again. I'm not sure if I have actually mourned properly.

Some son I am. Some brother. I don't deserve this second chance that I've been given.

I feel Katniss stop next to me and I look over at her. She's staring at the Justice Building, her eyes wide and her face pale.

"Peeta," her voice is quiet. "Our lives were changed here." I turn back to the building and suddenly I am seeing that day.

Waiting between my brother and my best friend. We watched as Effie Trinkett's hand dove into the bowl and I tensed as I waited to hear which of my neighbors I would watch die.

"Primrose Everdeen." My heart fell. My god, not her. Not that sweet little girl. But it was better than…

"I volunteer! I volunteer as tribute!"

If I thought my heart had stopped beating at Prim's name, it definitely stopped now as I watched her run forward, her beautiful dark hair coming undone from its intricate braid. Her eyes fierce and determined, her olive skin pale and twitching. Please God no. Don't take her. Do not take Katniss Everdeen from this earth.

Katniss was lead up onto the stage and I saw tears streaming down her cheeks. Effie hurried to the other bowl and all of the boys around me tensed up, hardly breathing.

"Peeta Mellark."

I barely heard it, I was so focused on Katniss. But my best friend gave me a little nudge and my head snapped up. For a moment, I didn't know what to do. I couldn't move. I merely stared around at everyone around me. Everyone who has escaped this cruel fate. My brother's eyes fell on me and I saw his mouth tighten. My father, standing beside him, had tears in his eyes. They already knew I was a goner. Not because I was weak but because they knew I would give my life for my District partner.

I climbed the steps and stood next to Effie. She told us to shake hands and we turned to face each other. Her eyes bore into mine as our hands touched. I know she was imagining my death while I was thinking of ways I could keep her safe in the arena. I had saved her life once, when we were young. I would gladly do it again. And I would die doing it.

I see Katniss moving out of the corner of my eye and it brings me back to the present. She falls to her knees and starts to heave. I fall down beside her, my arms going around her and holding her close. She's hyperventilating and I'm scared that she will make herself even sicker.

"Easy, easy Katniss," I whisper soothingly. We are starting to get some odd stares and I try to pull her to her feet. "Come on, let's get inside." She allows herself to be steered into the building and I close the door tightly behind us, letting out a deep sigh of relief. I turn back to her and pull her into my arms, my hand soothingly rubbing her hair.

"It's over, Katniss. The Games are over. There are no more Reapings, not ever. We did that. We made the world a safer place."

"Peeta," she sobs into my shirt. "I just wanted to keep her safe. I just wanted to take her place. Why…why am I still alive when my little sister is not?" I force myself to stay in this moment with her and not leave. Her words are killing me slowly, the pain in her voice like a knife twisting in my heart. I pull her away and my hands go to her face, forcing her to look at me.

"We can never know why, Katniss. We can just be thankful that we are still alive and that we have a second chance. They wouldn't want us to waste it with grief and questions. They'd want us to enjoy it, with each other. To use our time wisely, to make it all worthwhile." My thumb gently wipes at her tears and I kiss her cheek, tasting her salty skin. She lets out a shuddering breath beneath me and I pull her close again.

"She's been watching over you, Katniss," I whisper in her hair. "She knows I would die without you. She's been keeping you safe, for me. She loves you like I love you."

"I love you Peeta," her voice is muffled and she continues to shake against me. "I do. But I don't deserve this second chance. I feel like I am living her life. She was supposed to survive, not me."

"It's not up to us to decide who survives and who gets second chances. That power is not given to us. And she wouldn't want you to think that way either. She would want you to be happy and to do what makes you happy."

"How do you know what she would want," she snaps and I pull away from her again, fixing her with a hard stare.

"Because your sister was heavily involved in my treatment and recovery in 13. She was the one who convinced me how much you care for me. She didn't make you out like a saint, as Delly did, but she told me the truth and helped me come back to you. And when Coin decided to send me to the squad, your sister took me aside and made me promise to take care of you. 'Protect my sister with your life, Peeta, and little pieces of you will find their way back. Your love for her is still strong, you just have to find it again.' And she was right of course. Now I'm going to keep my promise to her and take care of you." She's shaking even worse and I bite my lip. I don't know if it was a good idea to bring up Prim's words; Katniss has barely even said her name. But her hand finds mine and squeezes it and I squeeze back.

"I think it's too soon for me to be in town," she chokes out.

"When, then, Katniss? We'll never really be ready. But we can't stay locked up in Victor's Village forever. Our district is rebuilding itself. We should be a part of that, we should be rebuilding ourselves with it." She doesn't say anything but her grey eyes seem to glow. I gently kiss her forehead and tug her with me. The Justice Building is now composed of various offices and I pause in front of a desk, when a cheery face looks up and lets out a squeal. She runs around the desk and nearly jumps into my arms.

"Peeta! My goodness, look at you! You look wonderful!" She turns to Katniss and looks like she is going to cry.

"And Katniss! You look so great! How have you been?"

"We've been good, Delly," I say with a smile as Katniss clamps her mouth shut.

"I'd heard you returned to the District but I haven't seen either of you around town. I wanted to stop by, I just…I just didn't know…"

"It's ok, Delly. We haven't really left Victor's Village until now. Katniss goes hunting but I stay in my kitchen mostly. We're healing though. Together." I see Delly's eyes flick downwards my hand in Katniss's and she looks back up at me, her smile widening.

"Everyone has been asking if you two are back together! Are you looking for the Justice of the Peace? He is the one who deals with all the official marriage papers." I feel Katniss gasp beside me and I squeeze her hand before I shake my head.

"We're not getting married, Del."

"But…I thought-"

"It was a lie I told to the Capitol to protect Katniss. We were never married," I say quickly, feeling Katniss's hand grow tighter.

"Well, now that you're back, nothing's stopping you, right?" she says cheerfully. Katniss breaks away and I look quickly to see her hurrying away. Delly's face falls and she bites her lip.

"Peeta, I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

"It's ok, Del. We're just…we're just being careful. We're taking everything slowly." She nods in understanding and I strain to see where Katniss has run off to.

"Excuse me a minute," I say quickly and she nods in understanding. I catch up with Katniss at the end of the hall and take her hands in mine. Surprisingly, she doesn't pull away.

"Katniss, it's ok-"

"No. No it isn't. I knew this would happen. They just want to see the star-crossed lovers, in the spotlight again!"

"That's not true," I protest. "Delly is our friend. She saw…how we were in 13. She just wants to see us happy."

"I don't want to get married, Peeta. Ever." Her words take me by surprise and I take a step back.

"I can understand if you feel like that now, but-"

"No. Ever!" I sigh. No one can reason with her when she's in this state and I don't feel like trying. She's dropped our hands and she has her arms crossed over her chest. I run my fingers through my hair, frustrated and at loss at what to do. I continue to watch her and she shakes her head.

"I should just…go back home. What am I even doing here?"

"I asked you to come with me," I say hotly, feeling my temper rise. "You said you would help me. Because you love me. You know I need you."

"Peeta, you don't need me. You need someone who is whole and beautiful and is willing to give you everything she possibly can. I don't have much to give. I'm too broken."

"Stop it," I say sharply, cutting off her painful words. "Stop it right now. I don't want to hear anymore." I approach her and notice she is trembling. No doubt she's imagining me wrapping my hands around her neck. I reach out and she winces. Ok, so that one hurts. A lot. But now I am so past frustrated with this girl that I have to take deep calming breaths before I speak again. I back her up against the wall and grip her shoulders.

"I'll say this once. I don't want anyone else. I never have. You're IT for me, don't you understand that? I cannot, and will not, survive without you. You don't want to get married, that's fine. As long as I can wake up beside you and come home to you at night, that's all that matters. You don't need to take my last name for me to know that you love me. We don't need a toasting or official documents. We don't need to get married for me to call you mine." My voice is low and sharp. I make sure she hears every word, as her eyes bore into mine. My hands relax on her arms and move down to take her hands again.

"Come on. We need to find the mayor." I tug her along with me, not really giving her a choice. She's silent as we make our way back down the hall and Delly looks up tentatively.

"Delly, can you point us in the direction of the Mayor's office? We're here to inquire about re-opening the Bakery."

"Of course Peeta. Just one moment." She presses a button on the intercom and leans in to speak to it.

"Peeta Mellark and Katniss Everdeen are here to see you."

"Show them in." Delly stands and gestures for us to follow her. We walk along the hallway and she stops in front of the last door on the left.

"Go right in," she says with a nervous smile. I thank her and open the door. I squeeze Katniss's hand and she squeezes back, letting me know she hasn't left me. That she won't leave me.

The new Mayor is a younger gentleman with a kind face and grey eyes. He rises and smiles at us.

"Good morning, Mr. Mellark. Ms. Everdeen."

"Good morning," I nod as I shake his hand.

"Please have a seat." We take our seats across from him and I notice pictures on his desk. Suddenly, I recognize him.

"You're Thom's brother." He smiles and I wonder how I missed that smile.

"That I am. It's a pleasure to see you again, Mr. Mellark." I remember when he and his brothers had come around town with their father, fixing up Merchant houses. He was one of the Seam men everyone trusted and liked. Merchants hadn't done a whole lot of business with people from the Seam but we all liked and respected the whole family. I even remember this boy, Brent, working on our house and I snuck him a loaf of bread to thank him. They were all miners, of course, but they liked to prove they could do other work. His Seam eyes gleam as he takes us in.

"Katniss, you are looking excellent."

"Thank you, Brent," she says quietly, her eyes meeting his. His smile widens.

"It's been a long time."

"The Reaping, wasn't it? I never saw you in 13."

"My mother and father had sent me to District 8, to stay with an old friend. Thom got word to me about what had happened and I returned to 12 as soon as I could. People wanted Thom to become Mayor, but he turned it down so they offered it to me. Thom would have been better," he adds with a laugh.

"I'm sure you've been doing a wonderful job," Katniss says softly.

"Spoken to Gale?" I suck in a breath and I feel her tense beside me. Brent looks disappointed. Of course they would be friends. Gale worked in the mines like every other Seam boy his age and I figure that's how Katniss knows him so well. But it does leave me feeling quite awkward. I'd always hated how the District was segregated. Merchants thought themselves better than those from the Seam and it was a segregation I could never understand. I'm glad to see that a boy from the Seam is in power. Perhaps this new District 12 will be different than the one we've known our entire lives.

"He stopped by but he didn't stay long," she says coolly. "He had to return to District 2. He has a job with the government there."

"Yeah, that's what Thom told me. I know Hazelle misses him." Katniss gave another little shrug and I clear my throat.

"Um, the reason we came in today is because I would like to talk to someone about reopening my family's bakery."

"Wonderful. Let me get the papers on the property, give me one moment." My hands rest on my knees as we wait and they start to shake. Katniss reaches over and takes my hand and I squeeze it gratefully. Brent reappears with a pile of papers and my brow furrows.

"What's all this?"

"Your father's legal documents with the land. When you won the Games, he went to the Mayor and asked for the land to be put in your name. You own all of the land that the Bakery stands on, plus two acres that he purchased in case you want to expand." I feel my eyes grow wet as I look down at my father's messy signature. Oh Dad. You were always taking care of me. How I wish you could be here with me, to show me what to do. Suddenly, I'm not so sure if I'm worthy enough to carry on his legacy.

It's a mark of how well Katniss knows me, how she really is my support system, when she brings my hand to her lips and places gentle kisses on my knuckles.

"Do we need to sign anything to make it official," I hear her say. My heart speeds up at the word 'we'. Brent nods.

"I just need your signature here, below your father's, acknowledging the transfer of ownership. I think the next question is, would you like to try to rebuild the building? Or tear it down and build a new one?" I bite my lip. I feel like I have left my body and I am floating in the air, staring down at myself. But Katniss steps in again and brings me back.

"We'll need some time before we can make that decision. Peeta, go ahead and sign and we can go home to discuss it." I nod shakily and take the pen she is handing me. I don't know how but I manage to scrawl out my signature and Brent nods.

"Congratulations, Mr. Mellark. I know Thom has been in charge of a lot of the rebuilding. I'm sure he will assist you with the construction and the plans." Katniss stands and pulls me to my feet.

"Thank you for your help, Brent. We will be in touch."

"Have a great day, Katniss. Do call me if there is anything I can do to help." She nods and is now pulling me toward the door. I try to manage a shaky 'thank you' but it sounds like gurgling.

Katniss is now the one leading me home, wrapping her arms around me and protecting me from the stares that people are giving us. I don't even notice that we are home until she has lead me inside and sits me down at the table. She pours me a glass of water and sits beside me.

"Peeta," she says gently. I look over at her and my eyes become glassy. She doesn't hesitate in pulling me into her arms and holding my shaking body next to hers. I break down completely. I am a mess and become a sobbing child rather than a grown man. It's strange, that I am usually the one who holds her together but now she is the one who is giving me comfort. I love this woman. Without a doubt, I would die without her by my side. So I push aside my anger that I am the mess this time, and focus on the feel of her arms around me.