Chapter 6: Kunoichi
Ranma, Ryoga, and Mousse knocked fists together in celebration at having survived as they walked down the street towards the last destination and its waiting bus. "You three looked like you had fun," Wales drawled from behind them (he was the last man in the group). "Every time I glanced your way, there was a girl at your table during the lap dances."
"So, we broke our piggy banks," Ranma blustered. "Some things are a once and a lifetime experience."
Wales laughed. "Coming back again, are you?" he bantered.
"Nope," Ryoga said walking a fine line. "Once in a lifetime is once in a lifetime. I've got a girl, and I'm happy. One lady is enough, thanks!"
"You got that right!" Ranma added making sure what side of the line he was on.
"Looking to get married before your time, I think," Wales shot back.
"You won't convince them, Wales," Mousse threw out. "They are lost causes."
"Too bad. I have a feeling we are going where the ladies do more than dance for you," Wales said slyly. "A man can get mighty hungry…"
Ranma remembered an old saying and used it with a shrug: "Doesn't matter where I get my hunger, so long as I eat at home." Wales actually laughed at that. Ryoga banged fists with Ranma again while Mousse winked at his poser brothers.
Up at the front of the group, Olaf and Tofu led the party to the last destination. "How do the lads know about this place?" Olaf ask the Doc. "Those three are straight as arrows when it comes to women."
"Which allows the women to trust them," Tofu replied in an overly casual tone. "Akane used to hate boys, but she trusts Ranma."
"Bull," Olaf laughed. "She may have said that, but she really only hated the idiots that challenged her, and, even then, she didn't hold a grudge once they stopped. I can read people a lot better than that." Then he dropped his voice, and said: "Or at least I thought I could. I *really* didn't see this one coming…"
Tofu looked amused. "You think of Ciren as your little sister," he said. "You have a few blind spots where she is concerned."
"Perhaps, but everyone is little compared to me," the giant chuckled.
Daran and Mausu walked with Hideo near the middle of the group. "No bloody way," Mausu mumbled in shock.
"It's got to be Nerima," Daran stated in wonder. "Entropy taken to its greatest extreme or something like that."
Hideo laughed at them. "I'd normally say opposites attract and let it go, but I'm not sure what either of their opposites are. They are both off the charts. But none of that matters, it's happening anyway."
"Our world is doomed," Daran replied in a gloomy voice.
"Your world maybe," Shiran replied from behind them. "Me and my fellows are going to run home with our tails between our legs, bolt all the Gates, and take cover. This is *your* problem." Everyone within earshot burst into laughter.
Just behind Tofu and the lead group, Ciren and Ojima marched side-by-side and argued fiercely. "A girl's got to eat," she said sharply. "Would you rather I was sneaking into houses at night and draining men dry, leaving only their dry withered corpses for the sun to find?" she snapped with her nose in the air. She was still wearing the diaphanous silver gown, but she had put a thick form-fitting silk layer under it. It smoothed out some of her more erotic contours and provided warmth against the night. Her hair had returned to its normal length – midway down her shoulder blades. She also wore a thick woolen cloak over the outfit (which acted more like a cape) and white flat-bottomed slippers on her feet. Many a man observing her walked into mailboxes, light poles, or the occasional open manhole (this is the Ranma Universe after all).
"Of course not!" Ojima burst out. He looked rather stunning himself, even beyond the raw energy he was emitting. Unbeknownst to him, one of the busybody Kitsunes had enchanted his suit so he was now wearing something cleaned, pressed, and several levels above his pay grade. While not a martial artist, he was not the sort of inspector that had hid in his office and sent his men out to do his job. His Sight/Curse had shown him an endless array of the guilty and his constant and unending pursuit had given him a lean hunter's frame. While a little shorter than Ciren, his presence always made him seem taller than he was. Many of the women on the street were trying to get his attention, but failed miserably. "But you are trapping them…" he said while continuing to pursue the only strong argument he really had.
"There are many traps in the world, Ojima!" she cut him off. "Hell, we humans have formal names for others who set them! We call them 'Advertisers'! I at least deliver on the goods! My song promises knowledge, and it's in the song! I sang about the differences among men today – and every word was true!"
Ojima stopped for a moment. "Then there really are elves out there?" he asked in disbelief.
"Yes, Ojima – at least four orders that I know of," she said as she pulled him into motion again. "I didn't make that up. Because I'm a Siren, I can always tell fact from fiction. I spend a lot of time reading, observing, and learning. Every time I sing, the song is different. No one can lie to me, even when I rather they could." She said the last part bitterly, and it echoed within the inspector, keeping him silent.
Ciren quietly spoke into the silence between them: "It's taken me a long time to accept who I am, Shoichi." That was the first time she had ever used his first name. "It took me longer to find a way to feed the Siren in me that I could live with. I refuse to drain anyone completely – it's not a pleasant way to die. Even in battle, the sword, the gun, or the arrow are much kinder." She paused for a minute and then went on: "At least this way, I exchange one coin for another and no one gets hurt. But I understand if we cannot be friends." She said the last part sadly.
Ojima's eyes widened at her words and he snatched Ciren's hand from her side without even thinking about it. "Screw that!" he said just as firmly as he held her hand. Now, Ciren's blue eyes widened and her mouth popped open in surprise. She lifted her free hand to her mouth and looked at Ojima. The inspector – no – Shoichi – had a small smile on his face. Ciren recognized that he probably didn't use those muscles very much and that this smile was just for her. She let her lips curl up to form one of her own rare smile.
Mousse watched his Master and the inspector hold hands up near the front of the group. A smirk crossed his face as he saw a red thread form between the couple's wrists and glow brightly.
"Hey Fox!" one of the merc's yelled. "You sure you know where you're going? We've left the neon behind. This is starting to look residential."
"Almost there!" Tofu promised.
The group turned a corner and saw their bus waiting about ten blocks away. It was parked next to a large house sitting on its own hill. The house was large enough to hold several families and probably did – there was no way one family could pay the taxes on it in this part of Tokyo. The front door of the house was brightly lit with a blue light over the door and was visible due to the hill. The large windows on either side of the door were filled with white curtains that glowed to show that the occupants were awake. The windows belonging to the rest of the house had shades drawn, but there was light leaking out from the edges of the shades. Surprisingly enough, the house was surrounded by a three meter high stone wall.
Tofu stopped in front of the large wooden front gate. The gate was shut, but a blue candle burned on a shelf, just below a small viewing door set about face level. Tofu read the writing on one of the gate posts out loud: "House of the Falling Star". Then he turned to the group and yelled: "Ranma! Get up here! You have to make the introductions."
"Yes, sir!" Ranma answered and worked his way forward.
"Fox, where are we?" Pauls called out.
"We are at a Kunoichi Tea Room and Bath House," Tofu said. There were a few whistles from the audience and a few confused looks. He continued: "This serves as a training ground for the true Kunoichi or female ninjas. You can think of it as a Hostess club when the attention is more personal and a little more insistent. It is not a bordello – you might be able to charm a woman, but she is not obligated to you – you also might be sorry you did charm her. You have three choices: you can join me inside which is a complete unknown; you can get on the bus and recline in one of the nice seats, enjoy the liquor Olaf set up, and rest or watch the mini-screens for the rest of the trip; or you can get on the bus and the driver will take you back to a few 'choice' locations in Kabukicho and you can take your leave of the party. I'm going in."
The Kitsune Yul immediately shouted out: "I'm in!" His fellows echoed the sentiment.
Artel called out: "I already know where the best whore houses in Tokyo are." A few men laughed at that. He continued: "But I'm not passing up a chance to meet a real live Kunoichi – especially when she's not trying to kill me." There was more laughter and even more agreements.
"Female ninjas?" Othan said. "If there are students, then there are Masters. No way I'm missing this – even if we just sit there drinking tea and discussing training styles, it would be worth it."
Ojima raised an eyebrow at Ciren. She pointed at the house imperiously, so he just nodded. Ranma, Ryoga, and Mousse just stood by Tofu without saying a word, their minds already made up. In the end, it was only Hideo who debated getting back on the bus and calling it a night. Finally he said: "Curiosity will be the end of me yet – I'm in."
Tofu nodded to Ranma who then pulled the bell rope. The sound echoed loudly in the night. Very soon, the peep hole door slid open and a young girl dressed in a pink kimono about 13-years old peeped out. "Can I help you?" she asked.
"We have reservations for now," Ranma told her politely.
"Your name, good sir? She asked.
"I am Ranma Ono."
"Oh, Lord Ranma! Hold on a minute!" she said. Ranma winced. "I'll get my Mistress!" The girl snapped the door shut.
"Lord Ranma?" Ciren teased. There were many raised eyebrows looking at Ranma too.
"Not my idea!" Ranma hissed. "I kept pushing for just 'Ranma' or 'Mr. Ono'. But the guide I met this afternoon kept insisting on 'Lord Ranma'."
"This is true," Mousse said, backing him up. "He was blushing fiercely while she was doing it and Akane was laughing her head off. I was 'Mr. Ono' though. Akane was referred to as 'Lady Akane' which caused her to blush too."
"Let that be a warning to all of you," Tofu said. "The Kunoichi have their own view of the world. They are also master spies as well as assassins. They may know more about you then you think they do."
Within a short time, they heard a bar lifted from the gate, and the gate was opened carefully. A young woman appeared, dressed in a red and black kimono. She looked to be in her mid-twenties. She bowed to Ranma and said: "Greetings again, Lord Ranma." Ranma politely returned the bow while suppressing the wince this time. "I am pleased you were able to make it. My Mistress is delighted as well." She looked at the rest of the group. "I am Anna," she announced. "I will take you to the Head of our House. Please stay on the path."
Ranma and Tofu led the way in. Everyone else followed two-by-two through the very elegant garden until they reached the front door and entered into a large foyer where they found house slippers waiting for them. As they changed, a young girl approximately twelve years of age approached Ciren and asked: "May I take your cloak for you, Lieutenant Blake?" The girl added, "Good sirs, you will find the necessary coat hangers to your left."
Ciren handed her cloak to the girl with a smile. The girl then turned to Ojima and requested: "Inspector, please wear your badge if you are going to carry your gun. It's important that your servers know the gun should be with you." Ojima made a face, but took out his badge and pinned it to his suit jacket. Ciren raised an eyebrow at him, but let it go.
Olaf chuckled. "Any other points you want to make, lass?" he said.
The girl smiled. "No, Commander Thorsen. That should do," she replied pertly.
"Don't be rude, Mi," Anna told her. Mi curtseyed (not bowed) to Olaf and left. "Please excuse Mi. She's training in espionage and we haven't broken her of the habit of showing off."
"That's all right," Daran said. "I know some fully grown spies who still have an issue," he added looking at Mausu.
"Said the pot calling the kettle black," Mausu replied with aplomb.
"Please save the banter for my Mistress," Anna requested with a smile. "Otherwise, I will have to repeat it and I don't know if I will get the nuances correct."
Anna led them to a large formal tea room. An elegant black-haired lady in her late forties waited for them. She was dressed in a red kimono as well, but the garment was adorned to mark her high rank. There were two slightly younger women, one on either side of her, also waiting. The table had been laid out to accommodate the party, and about thirty women who looked to be in their late teens to early thirties were ready to wait on them.
The black-haired lady said: "I am the Mistress of the Falling Star. You may call me Lady Hoshi. Welcome to the Tea Room." Her eyes perused the group and then rested on Tofu. "Lord Tofu, in celebration of your upcoming nuptials, you are our Guest of Honor. Normally, I'd have you sit on my right and be attended by Lady Yasuko. However, since your lord is here, that would be inappropriate despite the celebration." Shiran and Yul rolled their eyes. Hoshi turned and looked at Jak – the quietest of the Kitsunes. "Lord Jakaro, would you please sit on my right as the highest ranking member here?"
Jakaro sighed and his form shimmered. To almost everyone's astonishment, he assumed a humanoid Kitsune form with his tails – all nine of them – fanned out behind him. "It's always the quiet ones," Jacobs muttered.
Ranma had been about to mutter an oath himself when he felt a punch in the stomach. "SHUT UP!" Tomo yelled in his mind. Ryoga and Mousse stiffened as well. "That's one of the Kitsune High Lords. He often serves as Lord North for the Elders. He's your brother's Master. Like it or not, he's also your Master. You three idiots are Kitsunes by adoption – even you, Ryoga! You're Ranma's acknowledged foster brother, which makes you Tofu's and Mousse's brother too – Kitsune's don't do things by halves! Just think Bushido-squared from here on in! Please!" the little invisible Kitsune begged. There was a pause and then the three heard: "Oh gods, I am so dead…"
Jakaro now wore a fine set of red silk robes. The Kitsune lord gave a slight bow to Hoshi and walked forward to his cushion. Lady Hoshi gave a very deep bow as Jakaro approached. Then she turned to Tofu and asked: "Lord Tofu? Would you please sit on my left? Lady Hana will attend to you." Tofu glanced at Lord Jakaro, who nodded ever so slightly. Then Tofu bowed and walked forward. Hoshi addressed the rest of them: "Please forgive me for saying this, but please sit as you are comfortable. I have wrestled all evening with the seating order, but I have to admit I am at a complete loss. Does a Commander out-rank a young Cat Lord? How does a Wind Lord compare to an Earth Giant? Where do mages sit? How does one rank a Chinese Mystic or a Master Thief? A Sergeant who is also a Weapons Master? A Police Inspector? Then drag Kitsune Masters and Teachers into this and there is no hope. My apologies." She bowed to them all and they bowed back.
While Ciren and the men moved forward, Jakaro glanced at Shiran and indicated the seat next to him. Shiran nodded and moved to his Master's side. Along the way, Shiran grew seven tails but otherwise stayed in human form. Jakaro also glanced at Yul and nodded at the next seat. As Yul started forward, he stopped suddenly and turned to face Akio and Ayumu. Yul displayed five tails and pointed at the two seats just down from the one he was going to take. The mute gesture was surprisingly commanding considered how laid back Yul had acted all evening. Akio and Ayumu had been very pale before the gesture. Now they looked absolutely terrified as they moved forward – each showing three tails which were drooping submissively on the floor. Ranma, Ryoga, and Mousse took all this in as they sat down, seating themselves a couple of chairs down from Tofu. Olaf sat next to Tofu followed by Daran. Hideo sat on the other side of Mousse, followed by Ciren, Ojima, and Mausu.
Once everyone was seated, Lady Hoshi led the gathering through a formal Tea Ceremony. Many of the mercenaries were familiar with the tradition as were the native Japanese. The inspector helped Ciren through it and the assigned hostesses helped those unfamiliar with it as well. In deference to the number of people present, Lady Hoshi did not prepare the traditional bowl of thick tea to be shared, but used an abbreviated form of the ceremony and skipped to preparing individual bowls. The very first prepared bowl she presented to Tofu, which puzzled the doctor as he accepted it. When he looked at her, she motioned for him to return the bowl to her immediately, which he did. She then presented the bowl to Lord Jakaro, whose eyebrows had risen mischievously as he accepted the bowl. Hoshi and Jakaro performed the ritual acknowledgement and tasting, then the Kitsune lord set the bowl down. Hoshi prepared a second bowl and passed this to Tofu and motioned for Tofu to again return the bowl. When Tofu did, she passed the bowl directly to Shiran. Shiran exchanged the prescribed ritual with Lady Hoshi, but it was obvious the Kitsune was trying very hard not to laugh.
Ryoga glanced at Ranma and Mousse, and saw knowing smiles on the young men's lips. "O.K., what did you two do?" Ryoga thought to Ranma.
"We didn't do anything – Lady Hoshi did," Ranma responded in like manner. "She's about to pull Akio's teeth. It's one of the first things Tofu taught me about Kitsunes; if someone performs a Tea Ceremony for a Kitsune, the Kitsune is obligated to be on his/her best behavior toward the host until the next sundown. Since the sun is already down, we talking about tomorrow night."
Ryoga glanced at Lord Jakaro. "I'm not sure that's a good game to play against a Nine-tailed," Ryoga thought back. There was definitely worry coloring his thought. "A human trying to out-fox a Kitsune Lord is asking for it."
Ranma looked down to hide his smirk. "Asking for it? It's begging for it! But do you see the little switcheroo Lady Hoshi is doing with the Doc?"
"Yeah…." Ryoga answered back.
"She's making Tofu the honorary host. The protection now applies to *him* - not her. She's left herself wide open to Jakaro. Do you really think he's going to do anything to her if she stays submissive?"
Ryoga paused for a moment. "No," he thought back. "He's been pretty friendly to everyone the entire evening. If he was going to kidnap Tofu, he would have done it before now and lead us all on a merry chase – and there's jack-all we could have done about it."
"I don't know about that…" Ranma replied. "But it's not a battle I *really* want to fight right now. After the contest with Shiran at the bar, I was pretty sure Shiran would go along with it. When Jakaro showed up, I got worried, but look at him – he's amused, not offended. He could stop things right now, and he's not going to. It's done!" There was a triumph note to Ranma's last thought.
"What about the merc's?" Ryoga asked.
"Would you cross a Nine-Tails by kidnapping a fellow Kitsune right under his nose?" Ranma shot back.
"Ah…NO!"
"Damn straight!" Ranma laughed silently. "I ain't crossing Jakaro either! I don't care what time 'Brother Dearest' wakes me up – I'm going be on best behavior until sundown tomorrow!"
At that moment, Lord Jakaro looked directly at Ryoga and Ranma. Then he winked at them. Both young men turned red and scrunched down in their seats a little. "Do you think he…" Ryoga whispered.
"Yes," Ranma whispered back shortly, sounding very embarrassed.
"Good," Mousse whispered. "If I have to be on best behavior, so do you two."
"Shut. Up." Ranma and Ryoga whispered together.
Once Lady Hoshi served tea to all the full-bloodied Kitsunes, the Ladies Yasuko and Hana helped Lady Hoshi prepare the cups. When a cup was ready, Hoshi would take it and pass it to Tofu, who promptly passed it back. Lady Hoshi would then hand the cup to a waiting Hostess, who would bring it to the designated person. That person would accept the cup and perform the ritual with Lady Hoshi. The whole process was so efficient and precise, it was like a dance and everyone was entranced by the women's performance. Their kimonos shifted color as the ladies moved, making some of the kimonos' designs and figures flow. The room itself participated in the dance too as wall panels slid aside to reveal fascinating works of art here and there. Other items rose from the table itself to be appreciated, and then vanish from view again. The items varied from paintings to vases to weaponry to jewelry to clothing. Even though the Tea Ceremony took well over an hour and despite the late hour, there were no yawns, moans, complaints, or other signs of impatience. Finally, once everyone had performed the Tea Ritual with her, Lady Hoshi clapped her hands and the hostesses gathered the plates and put everything away. Then the ladies brought out a selection of sandwiches, sake, water, and cola. "Please," Hoshi addressed everyone. "Eat and relax. Feel free to stretch your legs, talk, ask questions, have a tour, or whatever pleases you."
Lord Jakaro led the way by asking about the House's history and founders. Tofu, Akio, Ciren, and Ojima immediately joined in. Mousse asked a hostess about some of the weapons on the wall, a conversation that drew in his other brothers. Shiran asked about training facilities which started a tour attended by a mixture of Kitsunes and mercenaries. Others asked about hot springs and saunas, hoping for a good soak (and maybe a massage). One of the hostesses put on music and began a fan dance which fascinated several people including Olaf and Daran. Soon everyone had broken up into small groups, all doing different things.
Eventually, Ranma, Ryoga, and Mousse followed two young women, approximately in their early twenties, through a tour of the armory and then into the main kitchen to grab some more sandwiches and sodas. They had bumped into other members of the Bachelor Party here and there during their travels. Ranma noted that many people were starting to get individualized tours (and attention). "How did these guys live so long?" Ranma wondered out loud.
"Definitely not paranoid enough," Ryoga noted.
"Good sirs, what is there to fear here?" Rika, one of young women, asked.
"We've met Kunoichi before," Mousse replied. "You're both probably fairly well along in your training, if you have not completed it that is. We are well aware appearances are deceiving."
The other woman, Ayaka, smiled demurely and said: "We are only women. What could we do against warriors such as yourselves?"
The three guys looked at each other. Mousse reached out with his glass of water and dumped it over Ranma, who did not try to dodge. Ayaka's and Rika's eyes widened and their mouths popped open as Ranko appeared in her gi. Ranko crossed her arms over her chest and raised an eyebrow at them while saying: "I'm very familiar with what women are capable of."
Ryoga pointed to Ranko. "She's handed our asses to us enough times."
Suddenly a cupboard door opened and a third Kunoichi appeared, about the same age as the first two. She walked past the other five and said: "The dojo is this way."
A/N: Next chapter – The Game