Safe Haven?
20 Harvestmere, 9:40 Dragon
When I left the house this morning, Sure Foot saddled and waiting in front of the house, Lily continued to cling to me, refusing to let go. As Ali pulled her off me, she cried, "Mommy, no! Mommy, no leave! Mommy, no leave!" Once she was in Ali's arms and I was settled into Sure Foot's saddle, she just kept crying, "Mommy, please stay. Mommy pleeease."
Her cries broke my heart. Once my escorts and I were on the road, I pulled up and looked at Cassandra and Leliana. "You made my daughter cry. Thanks to you both, she is afraid that I'm never coming back…I will never forgive either of you for this. Once I leave Haven, never come to my home or contact my family ever again." Then I urged Sure Foot ahead.
21 Harvestmere
9:40
Lily was almost inconsolable as Marnie left yesterday. I took her into the barn, hoping the horses would distract her. Biscuit walked over to the stall door nickered softly. I brought Lily over and Biscuit bumped her snout softly against Lily's hand. It was clear to me, and to Lily it seemed, that the foal was trying to sooth her.
Lily began to softy pet Biscuit, under the watchful eyes of me and Sunset. Biscuit whiffled on Lily's palm, which tickled and made her laugh. We stayed in the barn petting Biscuit and Sunset for quite a while. I put Lily in the pack and did some chores until Lily began to yawn. Being so upset really tired out my little girl. I went to put her down for nap and ended up taking one as well.
23 Harvestmere, 9:40 Dragon
We should arrive in Haven tomorrow. The trip has been uneventful, but not congenial. Once we left home, aside from necessary words, I've refused to speak to either Leliana or Seeker Cassandra. I wasn't being sullen. I was just ignoring them.
25 Harvestmere, 9:40 Dragon
We arrived in Haven yesterday afternoon. I'm staying in a room in the main chantry, and once I unpacked I just went to bed and slept until this morning. Today, I went with Leliana to the Temple of Sacred ashes (I am still avoiding the Seeker). It looked nothing like Ali described. I asked Leliana about it, and she told me about the modifications over the years. Apparently the Temple is now a "pilgrimage for the faithful." I asked if the urn was safe and while Leliana said it was, she wasn't very convincing. However, that is not my problem."
I've spent this afternoon in my room, thinking. If am honest with myself, my ire is really directed at Cassandra and at my overly sensitive conscience. If not for one or the other, I wouldn't be here. I meet with the Divine tomorrow for breakfast and I am not at all sure how that is going to go. Leliana and Seeker Cassandra will be there as well.
Leliana told me there is a tavern here. Being numb has its appeal.
26 Harvestmere, 9:40 Dragon
I woke up at dawn to get ready to eat breakfast with the Divine. My plan to get numb last night was derailed by a sudden attack of common sense: Breakfast-Divine-Hangover at the same time? Bad idea. So I restrained myself. Leliana joined me and told me stories about Ali and others during their time together fighting against the Blight. I had heard some of them from Ali and some were in his journals, but they made me smile.
27 Harvestmere
9:40
Teagan, at the request of the Crown, is giving the mages sanctuary in Redcliffe castle. The Grand Enchanter is named Fiona. I sent a letter to Teagan asking if the she is an elven former Grey Warden. I haven't heard back, but I have a feeling this is the woman my father said was my real mother.
That might be a silver lining.
27 Harvestmere, 9:40 Dragon
Yesterday, my meeting with Divine Justinia lasted well past lunch and was exhausting. She asked about the entirety of my time in Kirkwall: from the time we arrived during the Blight until I left for Ferelden. So, I told her everything: especially about Darktown and the Chantry's failure to give succor to anyone who didn't live in Hightown. I told her about Sister/Mother Patrice, the death of the Seamus. Of Elthina refusing to say anything one way or the other about the treatment of mages, as well as her repeated failures to pull Meredith's chain. I told her about the man who killed my mother and I told her about killing Meredith. She asked for my opinions, I gave them to her.
The Divine actually apologized for not intervening in the situation. That was really good to hear. She told me that mages may be given sanctuary in Ferelden.
All I could do when I got back to my room was sleep.
28 Harvestmere, 9:40 Dragon
Being both awake and with nothing else to do until the conclave, I poked around Haven for the first time since getting here.
I was rewarded with finding that Varric was here! I was so happy to see someone I knew and liked that I cried on his shoulder. Afterwards, he and I talked about why he was in Haven, and about the red lyrium. He said it was Lyrium, but that something had been done to it, corrupted it somehow. That is not good news. Varric feels responsible because of Bartrand. I reminded him of what I said as we left the Deep Roads: he was not his brother's keeper.
Varric asked how I got roped into this. When I told him, he said. "Yeah, the Seeker is really good at slinging guilt."
Truer words were never spoken.
I also visited with Cullen. Somewhere between Kirkwall and Haven, he acquired a scar on his upper lip, and lion armor. He looks good. He's not Ali, but he does makes a striking figure in his new armor. He has more of a swagger than he used to, but he still blushes at the drop of a hat, something Varric has way too much fun with.
29 Harvestmere
9:40
It's official: the mages are in Redcliffe. Teagan sent a note, confirming that Fiona is a former Gray warden and is elven. Teagan is a wily man. I didn't even tell him why I wanted to know. He asked me if I want him to inquire about Maric and me. I told him not yet. I figure I will wait until Marnie is home then perhaps she and I can take a trip to the castle to meet her.
29 Harvestmere, 9:40 Dragon
I knew Leliana was the Left-hand of the Divine. What I found out is that Seeker Cassandra is the Right-Hand of the Divine. The Right Hand is the Divine's closest ally, and can speak for the Divine. It would explain her "fervor" in trying to recruit me. It doesn't change my feelings, it just explains some of her deplorable behavior.
People have been arriving for the conclave and there are a lot of formal functions planned. I was hoping to not have to go to them, but I have to go to the formal dinner tomorrow night before the Conclave opens. Other than that, I am planning on staying near the Haven Chantry. Apparently I am speaking to the Conclave on the 3rd day of Firstfall. That means I can leave the morning of the 4th and be home by the 7th! I wrote a quick note to Ali, to let him know. Leliana says she can send the message with a raven. When I asked how a raven could take a message to Ali, she just smiled and said to write my note.
30 Harvestmere
9:40
I received a note this morning, it was delivered by someone who said he worked with Sister Leliana, and that the message was from Lady Theirin. He told me that if I wanted to send a reply he could return later in the day.
I told him to return.
… … … … … … … … .. …. …. …
29 Harvestmere, 9:40 Dragon
Lord Alistair Theirin
Redcliffe Farms
Redcliffe.
Dearest one,
All is well here. My talk with the Divine went well. Varric and Cullen are here, which has made my time here bearable.
I am limited in space as this is being sent by raven. I am speaking to the conclave on the 3rd of Firstfall. I will leave no later than the 4th of Firstfall and will be home on the 7th. Never again will I let my guilty conscious make decisions for me. I love you, and I never want to be parted from you again.
Love to you, Siobhan, Cricket, and Lily.
Marnie
… … … … … … … … .. …. …. …
31 Harvestmere
9:40
Things are starting to fall to shit. The mage-templar war has landed in Ferelden. Walter sent me a short note.
… … … … … … … … .. …. …. …
31 Harvestmere, Dragon 3:40
Dad~
The templars followed the mages across the border from Orlais and are attacking any mages not in the Castle. We are safe inside, but Arl Teagan and Arlessa Kaitlyn are worried about the villagers. The Arl and his knights are going into the village tomorrow to see what needs to be done. I tried to convince Arl Teagan that I could go with his knights and survey the village, and they could stay safely in the castle, but you know the Arl – he is very hands on.
I am keeping watch over the Arlessa.
As soon as mom gets back from Haven, please consider leaving for the Palace. I have a bad feeling about this.
Love,
Walter
AN: We are nearing the end. Thanks to those who have stuck with me on this story! Thanks to my Beta ElyssaCousland.