Disclaimer: I own only Hinote. The rest of this mess is all Kishimoto's fault.

Chapter 18

"It'll be great!" Said Anko. "You'll see. This will revolutionize shinobi training!"

She'd been telling me about one of Orochimaru's secret projects: a bit of fūinjutsu which would allow anyone tattooed with it to access the natural chakra about them. According to Anko, he'd found the key to it in the serum of one of the many snakes to inhabit Konoha's surrounding forests. The whole affair was quite surprising, for a few reasons.

First, performing sealwork on human skin was an advanced technique. This was part of the reason jinchūriki seals had to be made by masters–a seal which would hold fine on paper or stone might just fizzle out on someone's skin. The human's chakra network was to blame; it acted as a subjacent chakra field, which, with time, would warp sealwork, even if weren't as… disruptive as mine.

Just strengthening the seal was a terrible idea, too–if a seal which went crosswise the chakra network didn't break, the seal would damage the chakra pathways, often irreversibly. And, as the Hyūga had learned to exploit, when the chakra network failed, so did the body.

Then there was natural chakra, a whole other conundrum. From what records I had been able to find, "easily hazardous" barely began to describe it. It was the sort of stuff Tailed Beasts were made of (according to a secondary source, citing the Shodaime–the man himself left nearly no written records), and while some theorized all living beings naturally absorbed minute quantities of natural chakra through normal activity, actually pulling it in, besides being hard to do, tended to drive one insane, crippled or dead.

And now Orochimaru claimed to have not only managed this feat, but that his seal could survive my special chakra. Truly, the next step in the training of shinobi. If Konoha had access to some reproducible way of granting ninjas access to natural chakra, forget our dōjutsu supremacy, we'd be the most powerful village in the world by far due to the raw power difference.

There was just one problem: I knew this pitch. It was what every drug company told you, when they were trying to get you on some new clinical trial. To be fair, in my previous life I hadn't had much to lose, and everything to gain, by entering some of those trials. It was literally a matter of life or death. Here, I had no need to subject myself to this.

Also, Anko had mentioned nothing about animal trials, which worried me. There was no EMA here, no MHRA, no FDA. All I had as evidence of the safety of this procedure was the word of Orochimaru… and genius or not, he was a fallible human, and the stakes were pretty high.

I tried, in vain, to convince Anko to pull out. When that didn't work, I considered going to the Hokage with my concerns. But I didn't. He knows what he's doing, I told myself. The Hokage probably already knows. He's Orochimaru's teacher, after all. No need to act paranoid and upset one of the most powerful shinobi in the world by tattling on his sanctioned experiments.

A choice I would forever regret.

Sarutobi Hiruzen was at his desk when Hinote came into his was surprised to see her, at the very least. Well, as surprised as one could get when they had shinobi guards who announced anyone who came past the first floor. He was delighted she'd come, in any case. She used to visit him often in the past, to ask questions or show him her latest discovery, but he hadn't seen her since October Tenth.

He'd been wondering what to do with the girl. She'd been under Minato and Kushina's unofficial guard for the last two years, and now was in Kakashi's; that had been fine so far, but her clan-less status might present a problem later down the line. Purported equality or no, those without a shinobi clan behind them were seen as vulnerable, often even undeserving. He didn't want to see this added to the burdens she carried.

The Sandaime had a solution in mind. While the elders of his own clan would never stand for adopting her–they still remembered Uchiha Madara too keenly–the Uzumaki clan in Konoha had no such problems. The Council would surely protest, and see it an Uchiha power grab, and whine a whole lot, but they wouldn't be able to make an issue of it.

Hinote hadn't been an Uchiha for two years, so they could hardly raise an official complaint on those grounds. Kushina being the girl's guardian for two years was also a great factor in his favor, as was the fact that, as Naruto's guardian, Hiruzen was technically the temporary clan head.

But none of this explained why the girl was currently here, in his room. One look at her face was enough to know that she wasn't just dropping by to ask a question. Her face was warped with worry.

"Hiruzen-sensei. Do you know how Orochimarus-sama's natural energy experiment went? Anko told me she was going to participate, but it's been two days and I haven't seen her since!" What experiment?

He had had suspicions regarding his student for years. It was why he'd nominated Minato instead of Orochimaru to succeed him, though the latter was older and more experienced. His worries had only increased since then, and he'd had his ANBU monitor the Sannin 24/7 lately, looking for evidence of his wrongdoing. Despite everything. Hiruzen had dared to hope none existed.

But this experiment hadn't been reported. A few questions to Hinote confirmed this was worse than anything he had expected from Orochimaru. Dangerous, unreported tests on live human subjects didn't start to describe it.

The Hokage sighed. Why, Orochimaru? He summoned his ANBU.

"We're moving forward with protocol Hydra." He turned to Hinote. "Follow me, Hinote. We need to get you somewhere safe."

Hyūga Shoku had been shocked to notice Hiruzen-sama was in his battle gear once again. He'd barely ever worn it since the end of the war; much like her, he was starting to get on in years. Despite that, she knew the Professor was still as mighty as ever. Again, much like herself. He'd brought her the pipsqueak, who sounded intent on fighting her way to freedom.

"Let me help her!" She screamed.

Shoku was having none of it. With quick movements, she touched on some pressure points, and put the child to sleep. So woefully lacking in discipline. The Uchiha have always had insubordination problems, she mused. This must be amended.

"What is happening, Sandaime-sama?"

"I'm off to teach a lesson to my student", he answered. His voice had an unmistakably bitter undertone. The snake boy, she surmised.That one was never going to amount to anything good. "Hinote-chan", he continued, "was involved in this case,"–of course she was–"so I thought I'd bring her to you. I can trust you to keep my wayward disciple from her."

And come Orochimaru did. His breathing was just a bit labored, and he had the faintest smell of blood on him. He might fool others, but she knew he'd been to battle, and he'd killed.

"Would you be so kind as to allow me access to that girl over there, Shoku-san? She's a most valued companion, and I would like to see her. I was most distraught when she missed our meeting, two days ago."

She merely showed him her knife hand.

"You're not buying it, huh? Well, I have no interest to test myself against you, Shoku-san. That could end badly for both of us." He paused. "You sure I can't have the girl? I may be her best chance at a normal life, you know?" Much like a snake, he'd always been slippery, ready to change tack at a moment's notice. First trickery, then threats and appeal to sentiment.

"Can it, boy. I was a jōnin before you could walk. All you will get from me is an ass spanking. Turn yourself in now, and save me the hassle."

"As I said, I'd rather not."

He made to escape, but she was ready. Kunai flew at him with unerring precision, pressing him in the direction of the village, away from the house, while she advanced to cut off his escape.

Orochimaru was one of the strongest shinobi ever to serve the village, and Shoku was past her prime, but she was no pushover. He was also clearly wounded from his confrontation with Hiruzen-sama, and she didn't need to defeat him, just delay until the ANBU could catch up.

He wouldn't escape; within the range of her chakra sonar, she was arguably better than a regular Hyūga at tracking and discerning detail. She followed him as they traded attacks, yet he kept her at a distance, lobbing snakes at her whenever she got too close.

Soon, she could hear the sound of other shinobi approaching. So could he, going by his reaction. Noticing he was distracted for a moment, she activated the Shunshin, closing in on him at great speed. Got you. In response, he moved through seals quickly, drawing in air. A few moments later, just as she was about to hit Orochimaru, a great explosion of air hurled her away from him. She threw a shuriken at the Sannin, trying to get him before he escaped.

By the time the ANBU arrived, Orochimaru was gone.

The experiment was a massacre. By the time Hiruzen-sensei had invaded the lab, all the subjects except for Anko were dead. She was unresponsive and feverish, so they'd had her hospitalized. Not that the iryō-nin knew what to do with her–her condition was unknown, so the best they could do was keep her temperature down.

Anko had almost died–might still die–at the hands of someone she respected–admired, even–because of my hesitation. When I thought of what might have happened to her, because I hadn't been able to help her, because I hadn't wanted to tell on Orochimaru, my eyesockets throbbed.

I'd tried to take my decoration and tear it. I felt wholly unworthy of it, now more than ever. I've shared in the work of a monster. Shoku-sensei had hit me when she found out. She'd scolded me, told me that this paper was proof of the value of Rin-chan's life, that tearing it would be to spit on her survival.

"If you want to atone, don't throw a tantrum. Make things better."

Could I really? I buried my face in my hands. Hands which had almost been covered in the blood of my friend. Hand which were covered in the blood of so many others. I recalled the image, long ago, of a street covered in pieces of cat. I haven't come one inch from then.

When Anko woke up, I couldn't hold back my tears. I did hold back from hugging her, though. I had no right to touch her.

I was surprised when I heard Anko had called for me. I hadn't visited since she woke up. I couldn't handle being near her–it made me want to bury myself somewhere deep and dark. I've been avoiding my sick friend. A friend to whose sickness I contributed. Coward.

And so, there I was, in the hospital. Spreading my dangerous chakra around sick people to use active sensing felt like a Bad Idea (TM) (not that I could read the indications with it anyways), so I got an onee-san to guide me around.

I got the feeling she was staring at my facial scarring while we walked. Then again, so far as I could tell, most everyone did. I was told it was quite impressive and disgusting, so I wouldn't blame them. I got used to stares back when I started losing my hair, in another life.

She was on her hospital bed when I got there, breathing heavily. I'd been told by her attending iryō-nin that she got painful flare-ups from the seal, so they were keeping her under observation. It felt wrong. For someone as free as Anko, confinement must be as hazardous as the seal itself.

"Hinote." Her voice was strained, and I flinched. "You can burn seals, can't you?" She sounded pleading, as she moved the hospital robe to expose her shoulder. "Burn this."

There was so much wrong with this. My chakra could burn human seals, as proved by Rin-chan… but her case didn't speak very well of the risks.

"But-" I started answering.

"I don't care how much it hurts; it can't be more than this thing hurts when it flares. Please."

Hearing her voice like that, I couldn't deny her. And so, I fled.

"I'll ask your doctors." Coward.

I did get the go-ahead. Anko's condition had baffled all their experts, and no one in the village had the sealing expertise to figure out whether the seal could be unwoven, let alone attempt to do so. Botched human sealwork wasn't a common affliction, but it was nigh impossible to treat, so there was great interest in trying this. Add to this that the patient herself had requested it, and they were ready to do it.

They'd wanted to have a team of doctors with us, to observe and perhaps deal with aftereffects. It felt a bit crowded–they'd even brought the recovering Rin-chan and retired Yomogi here as experts–but I guessed that was to be expected of a possible "revolutionary treatment." Glorified cauterization, is what it is.

One of the younger iryō-nins, a short pink-haired (well, so I was told. There was a nonzero chance I was being screwed with) boy by the name of Haruno Tsutsuji (bit of a girly name, but none of my business), had been selected to aid me, channeling healing chakra while I infused mine into Anko. The hope was that we could restrict the damage to the seal, and harm Anko as little as possible.

Not that we had high hopes. We couldn't put Anko under–general anesthesia hadn't been invented yet, and what few sedatives and painkillers were known tended to play badly with her seal, because of course they do–so she had been tied to the table, a cloth put into her mouth, so that she couldn't bite her tongue. Just in case we this whole procedure didn't sound barbaric enough.

I placed my hands on her seal, hesitantly. It felt warmer than the rest of her skin. To my recently-developed short range chakra sense, if felt like it was moving. She squirmed a bit and moaned, and I knew it was flaring up, causing her pain. Knowing what Orochimaru is capable of, I don't doubt it's trying to defend itself.

Haruno-san's hands trembled, and I knew he was afraid of my chakra. Geez. Anko is the one going through it and she's not moving. A moment later, though, he steadied himself.

"Ready?" He asked.

I nodded.

I channeled my chakra in, and Anko screamed. So much for healing chakra. It did a great job of containing the damage my chakra did, but even localized cauterization hurts. It wasn't all my fault either. I could feel the seal writhing under my hands, like a living thing. And, like a living thing, it died when burned. I stopped the chakra, and Anko quieted down.

"Thank you", she whispered. Then she passed out.

After this, Anko recovered quickly. She got released two days later, and was soon back to her dango crazed self. She wasn't quite the same–her laughter came less often, and faded more quickly–but overall she seemed to have moved on.

I didn't understand. How could she laugh at all, with the weight of the death of dozens of people on her shoulders? I couldn't.

I felt dirty inside. I'd worked with Orochimaru, helped him do lab work. Were the samples I'd helped him dissect obtained from his captives? I tried to tell myself I had no way of knowing, that it wasn't my fault; surely, he wouldn't have risked discovery by involving him in his less savory projects, but the fact remained that I'd assisted, abetted his pursuits.

It took me another week before I managed to ask Anko. I felt horrible, like I was accusing her of not caring when she'd paid dearly for it. And she broke my every expectation.

"You think I don't feel it? It's precisely because I do that I move on. I need to do something with my life now, pipsqueak. Do some good, to compensate for all the bad I let happen. I can't erase all that suffering, but I can live to make up for it."

That hit me like a bucket of cold water. Anko hit something deep within me in a way Shoku-sensei hadn't been able to. I had been drifting around for a while now, aver since the October Tenth incident. It hurt, even more so now, but I couldn't afford to sit still. Not with this debt on my shoulders.

So I would do better. No more moping around and saying I was bored. I threw myself into training, getting back to where I'd been before the tragedy. If I let this get in my way, I could never look into Anko's eyes again. Not that I can, anyways, I thought bitterly, before smashing down that bit of self-pity.

I need to become stronger. Harder, better, faster.

...

Get out of my head, Daft Punk.

A/N: Phew! This was a dark one.

I'd like to thank Kayo-san for spotting a typo I and my much appreciated friends cum quality checkers had missed. As for Hinote's humor, I must admit figuring out where to insert some wit is one of my favorite parts about writing this. With all the darkness in Naruto,I feel we all need some levity... see the end of this chapter for an example.

I'd also like to thank Ryohei-san for the dedication, and ask them to please not stalk poor Hinote. She has enough to deal with. Also having Hinote for a spirit animal must suck! She keeps getting beaten up by life, poor kid. Cherish her, please.

To answer JimmyHall24, what Hinote does isn't quite like Bakuton... at least, not the garden variety. Regular Bakuton is optional in use, and also requires training. Hinote just burns/blows things up by filling them with chakra, and so far hasn't been able to use it for for any nin- or genjutsu (though she has been able to strengthen her body with it like regular shinobi, otherwise she wouldn't be able to keep up with taijutsu and bukijutsu training). Quite the inconvenience.

Another bit of news: I have decided to start adding "theme songs to chapters". I'll be editing them soon to add those, so do go back in a couple of days if you're reading this in real time and check it out. Actually, if you feel like it, I'm open to suggestions, since I haven't chosen a song for every chapter yet. As for this chapter, the song is Har- psyche! It's Paramore's Hard Times.

Reviews are welcome! Leave a bit of love, or a critique. Or just, like, your opinion. I'd love to hear from you all!