Chapter Five: A Planning Phase
"It makes no sense, Omar," Joker fumed. "Everyone knows Ivy and I can't poison each other! Why would that boy - "
"Aw, forget it, Boss," Omar shrugged. "That kid doesn't take anything for granted. If he doesn't hear it directly from you, he's going to assume your enemies started a rumor about you being immune to poison just so your allies will believe it and fail to warn you - or remind you - of a potentially dangerous situation. It would be an effective - and clever - way to take you out by proxy. He was just trying to look out for you."
The humming sound that came in reply was suspicious, nonetheless.
"He seems awfully cozy with her..."
"Naturally gentle with ladies, that's all," Omar assured him. He was starting to sweat for the kid.
"How long has he been here?" Joker asked sharply. "Five months?"
"Seven."
"Any family besides the sister?"
"I don't know." Omar was wary now.
"Find out."
(:)
Kylie hated the camper. She hated the junkyard where it was located. The sounds of the piles of crushed cars shifting and settling made it hard to sleep at night. The shower only had cold water because the water heater had been missing when Tobias had brought her here. The smell of mold and old gasoline permeated their cramped living space no matter how hard they cleaned or how desperately they tried to air out the no-longer-abandoned trailer.
But they'd hoarded all the money they'd managed to get their hands on. And Tobias had promised her a real home, away from the city. So whenever their situation felt overwhelming - like now - Kylie would close her eyes and try to imagine the flowers and the crops she would grow as soon as she had the space and fertile soil to work with. Maybe even a few apple trees... and a weeping willow so she could duck under its branches for a quiet, private place to read and daydream... and maybe they'd be able to keep a pet or two. That would be nice.
Kylie also found herself wishing they could share this dream home with a real family. She wasn't all that social - the Asperger's made dealing with people difficult - but it didn't seem fair to her brother. As long as it was with people who understood her somewhat, Kylie wasn't completely adverse to widening her small circle.
She tried to imagine the perfect new parents. Ones who could connect with both Kylie and Tobias. What traits would they have? What sort of histories would allow them to comprehend and accept them both? Kylie scowled and opened her eyes. This was where her imagination always seemed to fail her.
'Because people like that don't exist,' she thought savagely, 'And if they did, they would already have kids of their own and no need for you!'
She sighed, forcing herself to open her history book. It was a subject that should have, by rights, been interesting. However, in the hands and monotone voice of her teacher, watching dust settle was more enticing.
'Okay,' Kylie thought, 'My new parents would want to screen my teachers... They'd be really strict about it. There; I thought up one trait, anyway...'
Suddenly the noises outside weren't just those of gravity pulling down at stacks of ruined cars. Kylie heard footsteps, hushed voices, and a rustling sound, like someone was brushing aside the tall weeds surrounding the camper. Their tendrils scraped against the exterior wall.
Kylie scrambled into one of the overhead storage compartments, closing the hatch just as the door was forced open...
(:)
Ivy had compromised.
She'd punctured tiny holes in a series of neat verticle rows, creating perforated lines in the duct tape. With some mild effort, she though she should reasonably be able to break free of her bonds. The problem was going to be getting both Tobias and herself out of this place without either of them getting seriously hurt. But without her plants to help them, she was forced to rely on more human methods. And Tobias needed a diversion. He was pacing a hole in the floor.
"Can you describe the building's layout for me?" she asked him.
"Uh, yeah." Tobias stopped in his tracks and fished a pen out of his pocket. Then he plopped down beside her and drew a tiny box on his hand. "This is where we are." He added a huge box around the little one and sectioned off a few more places. "The boss- The Joker's office is right above us, but th' door is on th' other side from the one down here. There's stairs goin' up to it along here..." Again, he indicated the wall opposite from their door.
"So the office and this room create a sort of two-story island in the middle of a much larger room," Ivy clarified. "What about those rooms?" She nodded to a row of little squares on the far left side of the diagram.
"One is a bathroom," Tobias shrugged. "He's got stuffed locked up in th' others. I dunno what, though."
"I may have a few ideas," Ivy mused. "His laughing gas... Has masks to protect his people from it until he betrays them... Possibly Bud and Lou..."
"Those hyenas?" Tobias suppressed a shudder. "Ain't laid eyes on 'em since Harley took off with you, so I guess it's possible. He's usually got me tending the guns over here." He tapped the far right of his palm. Then, to get rid of any evidence that he'd been helping the prisoner, he licked a finger to wet it and scrubbed at the makeshift map until it was nothing but a smear. "There's one door goin' out next to those rooms, but that's it. The old garage doors got bricked in ages ago."
"What about windows?" she asked.
"Too high," he shook his head. "An' too small ta squeeze through. There's a skylight but no way ta reach it."
"And the office?"
"Windows on all but th' wall on this side." He pointed toward the door. "But there are still nearly twenty guys out there standin' guard. Omar's okay. He doesn't like th' boss at all, but no real businesses wanna hire him 'cause he use ta be in a gang. He used ta work for Penguin, too, but somethin' went wrong... He wouldn't hurt us, but everybody else would be happy ta rip us apart just ta have somethin' ta do..." He trailed off, studying her expression, which had turned a bit smug. "What're'ya thinkin'?"
"I'm thinking that you've been getting my water from the sink in the bathroom."
"Yeah..."
"And I'm thinking that if Harley's babies are in one of those rooms, they could create a disturbance."
Tobias gulped. If anyone hurt those hyenas, the Joker would kill them all. If Harley found out they'd been hurt, it would be far worse for the perpetrator. No one was dumb enough to harm those animals, but they were unpredictable without their mistress around to control them. He didn't like what Ivy was suggesting.
He also didn't have any better ideas...
(:)
The building sat in the middle of the biggest, ugliest, most debris-filled parking lot Harley had ever seen. She hunkered down behind a large pile of cement blocks between Batman and Robin. She found herself staring at the place, a bit dumbfounded. She'd gone back to her calm silence after they'd left the cave, hardly even noticing the blindfold until it had been removed again, but now she was feeling sort of jittery.
They'd hidden the Batmobile a few miles back and trekked to their hiding place on foot. Although neither of them had complained, she thought that both she and Robin had been glad to leave the two-seater behind. It hadn't been comfortable for either of them, her riding in his lap...
She was slowly becoming furious with herself, as well. She had been so happy with Pam, so grateful to have her delusions about the Joker stripped away, and so... so in love with her girl, she'd left all thoughts of her ex behind. She'd expected, perhaps, some retaliation eventually, but it never actually occurred to her that he might target Pamela instead of attacking her directly.
"No way to sneak up on this place," Robin noted.
"Then let's go in loud," Harley shrugged, speaking to the guys for the first time since they'd driven out.
"Storm the gates and rescue the damsel in distress?" Robin deadpanned.
"Somethin' wrong with that?" Harley demanded, instantly defensive.
"We generally like to form a plan before charging in," came the reply.
"Well, my plan is ta get my girl back," Harley retorted. "Then take her home, draw her up a nice bath, treat whatever injuries he's given her, an' then lay in bed with her an' worry all night like she's done for me a million times!"
"That's a goal, Harley, not a plan."
"Ah, who asked ya, ya little - "
"Shh!" Batman ordered.
Harley started to snap at him, but then realized his eyes were fixed on a large truck that was rambling up the road and across the parking lot. They watched as four men got out and drug a young girl, tied and gagged, from the covered bed, hauling her inside.
Harley's heart sank.
"This just got way more complicated, didn'it?"