The district is busy getting ready for both Christmas and Delly's wedding. I know it's been stressful for her to plan because she and Brent really wanted to marry in this beautiful venue they found in District 8. But since she had asked Katniss to be her maid of honor, she had to stay here and I don't know how happy Brent was about it, despite him being the Mayor of 12. Still, Katniss and I help as best we can. Between Delly's wedding and Johanna's wedding shower next month, Katniss is spread very thin. I haven't seen my wife in what seems like months. We're too tired to do anything other than sleep. I miss her but I'm happy that Delly is getting this. Johanna, too.
Annie has brought Finn to visit twice since their visit in January. For my birthday, Finn (with Annie's help of course) made me this really neat seashell art that I'm supposed to hang from the ceiling. I put it in my office at the bakery and it makes me miss Finn, Annie, and 4 in general. Annie also brought Finn here for his birthday. I presented him with a gigantic train cake and we invited a bunch of the kids from the community home to celebrate with Finn. Annie wept, saying he had never had a real birthday party and Colton brought his horses over and gave the kids rides. Finn clung to Katniss and I that night, thanking us over and over. After we went to bed, Katniss cried in my arms, saying Finn deserved so much more. I held her and assured her we would give our godson everything we could. I figure, if I'm not going to have kids of my own, why can't I spoil my friends' children? Finn often begs for Katniss and I to visit him in 4. I hate hearing him cry when Annie tells him we can't. Katniss has told me to just go visit but I can't stand the thought of leaving her behind. How I would love to just be able to take Katniss away whenever we want. Dane took Cora and Nathan for a little vacation last week and I have to admit, I was jealous. I'm sort of angry and slightly bitter with the government for keeping this stupid exile active.
President Paylor paid us a visit a few weeks back, very nearly sending me into a flashback. Seeing the Peacekeepers, or whatever they are called these days, surrounding our house made me panic and Katniss's hand in mine steadied me.
"I'm sorry to appear unannounced like this," she said solemnly. "But you two are near impossible to reach." It's true. Our mail has gone untouched and I'm sure it's pouring out of the storage unit we send it to. Katniss is never at home and I am either at the bakery or with Delly, helping her plan the wedding. I guess that's because Delly figures Katniss isn't into the whole wedding planning details but it would be nice if she could come help out once in awhile, as I have no clue as to what I'm doing.
"What can we do for you Madame President?"
"Please, Katniss, you don't need to bother with the formalities. And I'm here to discuss the memorial." Katniss and I froze.
"What memorial?"
"I told you, Peeta, we are building memorials for each district and we will eventually unveil a huge memorial in the Capitol, a reminder of the War and all it cost us. We are making our way around the districts to plan the memorials. Since the Mockingjay and her husband live in District 12, we decided it would be the first memorial. And we want you two to help us."
"Excuse me?" Katniss squeezed my hand and I winced.
"I know Peeta is a wonderful artist. And I know you both lost so much. I want you two, as well as Haymitch, to have a say in what 12's memorial will look like. What it will entail, where it will go. I would like to have the plans to submit by April. That gives you plenty of time." I glanced sideways at Katniss and noticed she was still frozen.
"You really want our opinions on this," I said quietly. "I mean, you care about what we think?"
"Of course," the president said gently. "We owe our lives to you two. Panem is indebted to you both. As well as the hundreds who fought and died in the revolution. Panem is a different country than it was two years ago. We have healed. We have overcome. We have struggled and fought and gotten back up. And Katniss Everdeen, er, Mellark, the girl who ignited the flame of this country, Panem is indebted to you." Katniss dropped my hand immediately and ran up the stairs, disappearing into our bedroom. Paylor looked surprised and a little abashed.
"Don't worry Madame President," I assured her. "I'll take care of her. And you'll have your plans before Reaping Day."
"Thank you, Peeta." We shook hands and I saw her out. Once she was in her hovercraft, I went up the stairs to find Katniss buried inside our closet. It took me hours to coax her out and I held her tightly all night long. Once she finally came out and ate some dinner, she said nothing about the plans for the memorial.
I still haven't mentioned them. I did call Paylor once she returned to the Capitol and she took my phone call immediately.
"President Paylor, why is Katniss's exile still active? Hasn't it been long enough for the people of Panem to forgive and forget? Why does she have to remain trapped in 12?"
"It is for her protection, Peeta," she said earnestly. "There is still a group of Coin supporters who would see her dead. We have even intercepted several death threats over the past year. We can make sure she is safe, as long as she stays in 12." This angered me and I told her I had to go. I can protect my wife just fine. I don't need an army of Peacekeepers. I don't need Gale Hawthorne and his security. I protected her on my own, didn't I? I protected her in the Hunger Games and…
I stop and run my hands through my hair. We protected each other. And she would murder me if she heard me say I am the one who protects her. We protect each other. She doesn't need someone to watch over her all the time. She's the strongest and bravest person I know.
I left the bakery early, hoping to come home and cook with Katniss. But she's still not home so I get started on dinner without her. She's been at the orphanage more than in the woods lately, so I decide left overs will do just fine. As I'm heating up the deer meat to make spaghetti, I hear the door slam and I jump. I hurry to the front door and I hear sniffles. I stop when I see her, taken aback. Her face is red and blotchy, her lips chapped from the wind. Her hair is hidden by a green hat, dotted with snow.
"Katniss?" She looks up and our eyes meet. She's been crying. Her red-rimmed eyes close as she walks straight into my arms and she buries her face in my shirt.
"What's wrong? What happened?"
"Lara's gone," she said, her voice muffled by my shirt. Frowning, I pull her away and study her intently.
"What?"
"Delly and I talked about a couple of the girls being her bridesmaids and I went to the orphanage to ask Lara if she would want to be with me. But she's gone, Peeta! She's gone and I'll never see her again."
"Slow down. What do you mean, she's gone?"
"Her brother came back for her and took her to District 5. He got a job there and can take care of her." My poor Katniss. As glad as I am that the little girl is with her family, I know she and Katniss grew very attached to one another.
"Honey, that's a good thing though. She's with her family, still. She's not an…an orphan," my throat sticks at that word. I'm an orphan. I've never really thought about it like that but I guess I am. She rests her forehead on my chest and I stroke her hair.
"I wanted her, Peeta." Wait…did I just hear that correctly? I pull her back and she can't seem to look at me. I hold her face in my hands and force her to look up.
"Say that again."
"I was going to ask you…I wanted to adopt her. After the holidays. I asked Helga how to go about it and Delly was going to get me the paperwork. I just didn't know how to bring it up to you. I fell in love with that little girl and wanted to bring her home. And now I'll never see her again." She sniffles and closes her eyes again and I allow her to fall forward into my shirt. She wanted to adopt Lara.
She wanted to ADOPT that little girl. For a brief second, I allow myself to dream about that. That beautiful child, who looks so much like Prim, holding our hands as we walked through town. She looks more like me than Katniss but I could always pretend. I would love her as my own.
I know how painful this is for Katniss. I hold her close and scoop her into my arms. I carry her upstairs to our bathroom and set her on the toilet. She sniffles occasionally while I run a bubble bath for her, then I help her out of her clothes. She isn't fighting me as I lower her into the water and I unbraid her hair. When I rise to my feet she looks up at me and blinks back tears.
"You aren't staying with me?"
"I was going to make dinner…" I trail off, seeing her sad look. Sighing, I unbutton my pants and shove them down my legs, kicking them and my underwear aside. I pull my shirt over my head and step into the tub. She moves forward so I can sit behind her and I pull her against my chest. Her hands find mine under the water and she turns her head so her cheek rests against my arm.
"We'll see Lara again," I whisper in her ear, rubbing her arm soothingly. "We can invite her and her brother to come visit. I'm sure Helga has all of his information, since he removed her from the home. You'll see her again, love."
"Am I a terrible person, Peeta?" I frown and look down at her.
"Why would you ask that?"
"Because I feel like…I was trying to replace Prim." I squeeze her tight and rest my chin on her shoulder.
"No," I say firmly. "You love Lara, like you loved Prim. There's nothing wrong with loving more than one child. You didn't try to replace Prim. She will always have a special place in your heart that no one will ever fill, not even me. Lara taught you not to be so afraid of your motherly side. You giggled and relaxed and had fun at the orphanage. With those kids, you're not the Mockingjay or the Victor. You're just Katniss. And you need to try to be yourself more often."
"I am so confused, Peeta," she huffs. I have to smile at her impatience.
"Ok, well, I'm just saying that she brought out a side in you that I didn't think I would see again after what happened to Prim. And I love it. Prim would love it too, I'm sure of it. There are plenty of kids at that home who need love, just like Lara did. You can love them all, Katniss." She rubs at her face and nods.
"I know," she sighs and leans her head back to rest on my shoulder. The bathtub squeaks as she moves further down into the water, propping her legs up on the tub, her knees bent slightly. The way she is spread open makes me grow hard with want and I groan as I know Katniss has noticed. But she says nothing, I guess trying to make it easier on me. It crosses my mind how long it's been since I have been inside her and my cock twitches under the water. Damn it. I'd just wanted to comfort her. Not perv over her when she's upset! She shifts a little, trying to scoot away from my groin. She leans her head back on my stomach and reaches up for me. I lower my lips to hers and drink her in. From this position I have easy access to her breasts, which I cup in my hands. One hand tweaks her nipple and she cries out against my mouth. Her hand finds mine under the water and brings it down to her submerged thighs and I tease her with the tip of my finger. Her hand shoots out to grip the side of the tub and she tosses her head back, her hair splayed all over my chest. I lean forward and suck at her neck as my fingers push into her. Her knees quiver and I want to continue to the teasing but damn if I don't have her soon I may lose it. I turn her around and she seems to know exactly what we need. She throws a leg over my waist and her hands find my aching cock. A few strokes of her hand and my own hand shoots out, stopping her.
"I'm not going to last long as it is," I tell her. Her eyes darken but she grips me as she slides on top of me and we both groan loudly. She rises up and down, splashing water all over the floor. I could care less. My hands grip her hips as I help her move over me and fuck does she feel amazing. My hands move up to grasp her breasts and I admire how perfectly they fit in my palm. Her hands cover mine and she throws her head back, bouncing up and down and occasionally grinding against me.
"Shit Katniss! Oh god, baby, yeah!"
"Let go, Peeta," she purrs. "I know you want to."
"Not…until you do," I say through gritted teeth, holding on as long as I can. She grabs my hand and brings it to where we are joined and I press my thumb against her clit. She screams, my name mixed with some curses, and starts to bounce even harder. Shit Shit Shit!
"Fuck Katniss!" I feel her walls clench around me and I am gone. She leans forward, her forehead resting on my shoulder. I wrap my arms around her and our chests press against each other. The feel of her bare breasts pressed against me makes me ready for round two. She leans back, her brow quirking, and I know she has noticed me hardening inside her.
"My my, Mr. Mellark sure does have stamina tonight."
"Guess that's what we get when I don't see my wife for weeks," I retort and she smirks. I notice there are bubbles covering her breasts and part of her stomach and I suddenly have the vision of Katniss covered in whipped cream. And chocolate. Anything sweet.
Fuck! My cock jerks inside her and she gives me a sly grin.
"Just what are you thinking of now, Peeta?"
"You are still on top of me," I say defensively. She wraps her arms around my neck and her fingers grip my hair. I rise to my feet, still holding her in my arms, and get out of the tub. Without grabbing a towel, I carry her into our bedroom and proceed to take her against the wall, on top of the dresser, and finally a gentle go tangled in our sheets. I forget about how hungry I am and quickly fall asleep in her arms.
I have to say Delly's wedding is quite beautiful and I try to not to look around the Justice building while we wait for the bridal party to appear. Effie called in some favors with the decorating and everything looks striking with splashes of purple here and there and soft lighting like a candle's glow. Brent, Thom, and I are in dressed in grey suits with purple ties and matching purple flowers pinned on. Brent shifts nervously and I smile, remembering how incredibly nervous I was on my wedding day. Katniss and I have been married two years now and I don't regret a single day. Nor do I stop thanking my lucky stars that the odds were finally in my favor, the day I won her heart.
There is soft music coming from the back of the room and more people appear on the silver carpet laid out in the aisle. I see several of the little girls from the orphanage, all dressed in frilly purple dresses as they practically run down the aisle. Helga stands off to the side, hissing directions. I suck in a breath when I see Katniss. She looks absolutely stunning in a long purple gown, her dark hair piled on top of her head with a few purple flowers clipped in. She's holding a bouquet of yellow and purple flowers and her head lifts so that her eyes meet mine. I silently mouth 'I love you' as she approaches and see her small smile as she stands off to the side, across from me. I can't keep my eyes off her, even as she looks away. I know all attention should be on the bride but I cannot stop staring at my gorgeous wife. Finally I am able to tear my gaze away and I see Delly being escorted by her brother, Daniel. She looks absolutely lovely, with her blonde curls pinned up and a long white veil follows behind her. Her dress is huge, white, and poofy and I am reminded of the many dresses that Katniss had to try on for our fake engagement. I clear my throat and straighten up and feel Katniss's eyes on me. I shake my head, to show her I am ok, and my smile widens as Delly and Daniel get closer. Brent has lost all breath, I think. He is gazing, open-mouthed at his bride-to-be and Thom gently nudges him. Delly stops in front of him and smiles shyly. Brent leads her up to the archway of flowers and there, they become husband and wife. Brent is so lost in his wife's gaze, he doesn't hear the man's instructions to kiss her. Haymitch, who sits in the third row, shouts out "kiss her already, you fool!" and there are titters from the crowd. Blushing, Brent and Delly share their first kiss as husband and wife and run back down the aisle to exit the building. I think technically Thom is supposed to offer Katniss his arm and escort her out but he seems to understand and nudges me forward. Katniss's arm slips under mine and I gently kiss her cheek.
"You're so perfect," I whisper in her ear, smiling when she blushes.
Delly and Brent invite us back to their new house for the toasting and they kiss after a bite of the toasted bread, provided by Mellark Family Bakery of course. Delly giggles as she feeds her new husband and I watch her with a broad smile. I remember growing up with this girl, always thinking of her as my sister. I am so happy she has found someone to make her as happy, as I have. Slow music starts up and people start to move to the middle of the floor. I hold Katniss's hand in mine while my other rests around her waist and she leans into me as we move slowly. Soon it's time to cut the cake and Delly calls me forward to introduce me as the 'creator of this masterpiece'. I imagine everyone already knows I made their cake. Mellark Family Bakery is the only bakery in 12 now and I have to say, I'm glad of that. I kiss Delly's cheek and shake Brent's hand before I make my way back to Katniss. She squeezes my hand and rests her head on my arm.
"The cake looks beautiful, Peeta."
"Thank you. I'm pretty proud of it." Brent told Delly to do whatever she wanted with the cake, so I actually made him a smaller one that was a lot less intricate, which he seemed very grateful for. Their cake is three tiers, stacked on one another, with purple fondant. Silver wraps around each tier and silver swirls with white pearls decorate each layer. I watch as Delly and Brent slice it together and Delly giggles shrilly as she smashes a piece in her husband's face.
The party goes all night and I am exhausted. Delly and I share several dances together and I dance with Posy more than once. Katniss is yawning near the back of the room and I remember I am supposed to open the bakery in the morning. But I feel terrible leaving. I make my way to Delly and pull her in for another hug.
"I am so happy for you, Del."
"Thank you Peeta," she says, glowing. "As I am for you. Things finally worked out for us, didn't they?" I glance back at my wife and see she is nodding off. I kiss Delly's cheek and tell her I need to get Katniss home. Delly comes with me to hug Katniss so tightly I think Katniss puffs for breath but she thanks my wife for everything and tells her she couldn't have done it without her. I drape my arm around Katniss's shoulder, call for our jackets, and escort her back home. I help her out of her dress, reach for the pins in her hair and she sighs when her locks fall around her shoulders, and lead her to the bed. After I strip out of my suit, I fall into bed with her and we fall asleep wrapped in each other's arms.