A/N: Incredibly long here guys. This is there perspective of the four months. Pay close attention to POV switches and whatnot. Read on my lovelies 3

Chapter 4

"Thank God you're back. Cas is absolutely insufferable alone while shopping," Blaise says as he sits eating a pretzel.

"It feels weird to be back… like the person I'd made myself into while I was here is lost," I replied perhaps a little too introspectively. Blaise was nothing if not insightful though.

"You're not supposed to be the same person you were when you left honey. No one expects that of you." In an instant his hand is covering mine and I'm thankful for the familiar contact. A contact I'd been so out of reach with since leaving.

Four. Fucking. Months.

"It was just so surreal last night… I half expected a room number to be in my hand when he left," I mumbled.

"He looked like shit when he left… like he was cursing himself for walking away honestly. But this was heavy for you two. He doesn't know the extent of it for you."

"Because I chose not to let him in," I snarled wishing I could only lay my face on this cold table forever.

Ring. Ring. Ring.

"Hello?" I asked rather uninterestedly. It was the weekend, I was at the mall with my best friends, and I didn't want any damn business calls.

"Um… Amelia? It's… It's Matt. Have I caught you at a bad time?" Jesus talk Amelia. Talk. Tell him he hasn't. Tell him you'd drop anything for him. Talk. "I'm sorry… I can.. I'll just…"

"NO!" I put my face in my hand cursing myself. After four months you just scream at him? Nice. "Christ, sorry Matt. I just was caught a little off guard. I didn't think you'd…"

"Yeah, me either," he clips.

Deserved that.

"So um… what's up?" I asked with more enthusiasm than the situation warranted.

"I just wanted to see if we could…talk? I know that's probably the last thing you wa…"

"We absolutely can," I added cutting him off. The tone of his voice suggested he was blaming himself for some part of this and that was absolutely not going to happen. No way Jose.

"Do you want to now or meet? I don't…" He rushes quickly.

"No, now isn't the right… time. Can I call you later so we can figure out when would be best?" I asked nervously biting my nails. Way to make it sound like a fucking business meeting. Jesus.

His voice turned cold. "Yeah. Chat later."

Click.

"I swear to God if we weren't in the middle of a mall I'd scream fuck so loud."

Blaise rubbed calming circles on my back and I tried to relax. I needed a new pair of shoes, not to beat myself up over all this even more. Of course I wanted to talk to Matt, but I had to realize he was hurt still. He had every right to be. I'd left him when we finally acknowledged that we were real, established, and built from the roots of our hearts entangling themselves with one another.

MPOV – The First Month

Nope, she'll be back. Fuck it all.

I started picking up the things she'd randomly strewn as she packed her life here up. She had packed up her little life. The things that were mingled with my worn existence here.

She'd be back.

My phone chimed with a text and my heart jumped. I'd been staring at the same wall, unmoving for 3 hours.

Rob: She's back in the states. She's… not good. Give her some time. I'm sorry dude.

I stared at my phone's screen – unblinking. My fingers reacted on their own accord as I typed out a text to her, not answering Rob.

She'd never answer that text in the weeks to come. I did what I'd always done – worked. We finished filming and next month my life would be completely up hauled. By the 3rd week she had gone with no contact made I bought the place we'd rented. It didn't matter. She needed something to come home to.

On the last week of that month her publishing company called and I ignored all the calls – opting instead to change my phone number.

Matt: Sorry I haven't spoken to you. This is my new number. Please pass this on to Amelia in any event she may want to contact me. I was having some unrelenting calls happening. Thanks. And again… sorry.

I fell asleep before the clock turned midnight, wishing to go back a month.

The Second Month

The second month was just asking to be tortured. Filming kicked my ass and I'd no one to go home to. I lived off ham and cheese and Jammy Dodgers. Drinking alone didn't even fix any feelings I had.

"Christ Matt, you look like you've lost weight again," Alex scolded me.

I hadn't. And she knew I hadn't, but she was mother bird to a bird who wasn't even pecking.

"Tell me you're alright," she added seriously.

"I am, yeah. Nothing I haven't been through before."

We said our goodbyes and a very unconvinced Alex let me go.

By the third week of that month I felt a little better. I'd gathered up her remaining things and simply placed them under the cabinet that I now refused myself the chance to use in the guest bedroom. She'd left replaceable items.

A tootbrush.

A comb.

Hair ties and bobby pins everywhere.

But what hurt the most was the damn eyeshadow. The purple eyeshadow that she'd line with gold eyeliner. It was like she was born to wear purple and gold together.

I kept care of that until the end of two months. Then I threw that out. It was too much of her.

The Third Month

"Come on! Maybe you'll find a date!" Arthur roared.

Kazza smacked him upside the head and it felt good to be together one more time.

"I just wish I knew where she was and if she's… hurting. Ya' know?" I asked. I knew they thought I was asking if she was hurt about us, but I didn't intend that. I meant… what happened that made her leave so early? And if she was okay then who wasn't?

My head swam with possibilities for two weeks before I just began to get angry every time I thought about it.

Rob called on the last week of that month.

"Brittany just got back from seeing her," he said in a matter of fact tone.

"Mmm, did they have fun?" I asked sarcastically.

"She came home and collapsed on the bed… 4 hours ago. If she's that exhausted after one talk with her I can't imagine what…" he hummed and I knew he was shaking his head.

"Is this the first time she's talked to Brittany?"

"Yeah dude… no one has been able to get a hold of her. It was like she fell off the face of the planet after that first month. B was pissed. So pissed. She nearly called out the calvary, but eventually the grandparents called…"

I listened to him talk about how Amelia had shattered her phone and hadn't wanted another one. Hadn't wanted to be in contact with another human being. And I imagined Brittany being ripped into pieces. If Brittany couldn't get through to her what right did I have thinking I could?

The Fourth Month

"Yes, J. I can host the Gala. Just talk to my Agent about location please. I'm rubbish at that."

"Matthew I know this is completely inappropriate of me to ask, but have you had contact with Amelia? She still has a position, of course, but we are just a little worried about her. She's our star employee," he slithered. Something about that man unnerved me and I wasn't going to give him even a hint as to anything about her.

"What did she say when she left?"

"She said she had a family emergency and that she would transfer her FMLA papers to the office over seas when she had all the paperwork scored away. She didn't mention being sick… ever," he replied. I then knew he knew about as much as I did. I should get over the way his voice practically purrs out her voice.

She isn't mine anymore.

"Unfortunately I do not know the details, but I do hope she comes back to you soon. I know how valuable she is." I kept my voice as think as steel.

"Ah, well… thank you Mr. Smith," he replied clearing his throat. "I trust you know the Gala will be a masquerade?" He asked.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuckity. Fuck.

"Yes, of course Sir. Have a nice evening."

I didn't wait for his reply before throwing my phone. It was only the first week of this month. I had three more to go thinking about this Goddamn Gala.

On the second week I sat on my bed indulging in some self-pity as I took out my mask. Another arbitrary thing she had left here.

Ring. Ring. Ring. Ring.

"Hullo," I asked into my phone. I hadn't even bothered to look at the caller ID.

"Matt… are you in a place where you can talk?"

"Brittany?" I sat up panicked.

"Yeah… sorry it's been so long," she replied like it was her fault.

"Jesus, no. I'm glad to hear from you. I have this unlimited amount of time right now it seems. In between filming movies is surprisingly relaxing," I replied with a chuckle. I'd found myself able to do that more now, when I wasn't choosing to pity myself. I tossed the mask haphazardly and it landed on the floor next to the trash can by my desk.

Falling short of being gone forever – I mused.

"She's coming back."

"Hm? I'm sorry…" Surely I could not have caught that correctly. She must have been making fun of me saying I had a hairy back or something because if she was about to tell me…

"She's coming back. To London. We're helping move her into a studio by Lutwidge. She'll be at the Gala. We'll be at the Gala," she stated.

If I were in a better state of mind then I would have asked if she was pissed Amelia was choosing right then to come back. If I were in a better state of mind I would have been asking how Amelia was.

Was it her that was hurt when she left?

Had it anything to do with me? Us?

Was she okay?

"Does she need a mask?" Was what I stupidly asked instead – looking across at the mask that had tethered us together at the start.

"Send it to Rob and I'll make sure she gets the message Matt…" she replied quietly.

"Will do…" My heart pounded too fast for any living man to have to experience in the silence that followed. So many questions.

"What message should I be relaying?" She questioned.

It went unspoken. Do you hate her? Still love her? Is this a goodbye or a hello? What was next?

"Just be Switzerland right now. I don't… it's been four months, but it seems like four years. I don't know what to tell her right now," I answered honestly.

"I can be Switzerland," she replied immediately. "Just… she's vulnerable when it comes to you Matt. Please, be careful. She can hurt you without meaning to… she did hurt you without meaning to."

I tossed that around in my head after we hung up, the mask flipping back and forth between my hands. She hurt you without meaning to… She shouldn't… no… absolutely couldn't feel like she had to feel bad for putting family first.

It had taken a full four months, but finally the week of the Gala gave me some sort of instilled confidence I didn't know I had. I stepped up behind her. Her back exposed through the sheer of her simple black dress. My fingers itched to be connected with her skin. They itched to once again capture her frame in an embrace and my thumb rubbed repeatedly against my pointer finger to stop myself from doing exactly what I wanted.

I reached out to her with my left hand, just a simple prod to her shoulders. And her soft lilting voice agreed to a dance. She swayed rigidly with me through the first song, but soon she relaxed – a tentative deep exhale coursing through her body. Her breath fell across my neck.

J announced that the last song was to be played and we held one another up. We knew it didn't mean what we'd wanted it to… willed it to. But it meant something, and that was all I needed – to know there was still something.

I'll be a star, you keep directing me

Let's make the best scene they've ever seen

Let's capture the moment

'Cause even forever ain't forever

I swear by the moment

'Cause together ain't promised forever

Let's live in the moment

As long as we got each other

When she left wordlessly I watched her delicate hand slip from mine. Reality crashed down around me as I stuffed my hands into my pockets. Was I who she would want anymore?

A/N: Next chapter is the four months from Amelia's POV. I'd intended to put them together, but as I was continuing her POV I thought this was the perfect ending for his. I apologize! Makes them fully meeting longer, but… they're worth it, right? See ya' next time!