Chapter 12
Emma glanced over at Neal…he was fine. He was standing there looking at her. They'd been looking for Gold for a little while now and he'd been just fine.
But…Belle found the strange mark on the palm of Neal's hand in her research. It was from a key that opened the vault of the Dark One. Apparently it could have been used to resurrect Gold, but Neal should have been dead if he used it.
Almost as if on cue, Neal cried out and fell to the ground.
Emma kneeled down next to him and reached for him. Right in front of her eyes, his face transformed into Gold's face. She withdrew her hand and sat back a little. She was stunned.
Gold was yelling the same thing he'd been yelling when she and David found him before the flying monkey attacked. He kept saying there was no room and there were too many voices.
And then Neal was back and he was still crying out in pain. What the hell did he do? Gold was…inside of him somehow.
"I think…I think Gold is inside of you. I think that's how you're still alive."
"I heard my father's voice in my head. He's in there. He's in me." Neal confirmed what she was thinking.
Realization dawned on Emma. "He said there was no room…he meant you."
Neal met her gaze with determination in his eyes. "I need you to help me, Emma. Use your magic. Separate me and my father."
Emma stared at him in disbelief. "Really? You'll die."
"I know, but you need my dad more than me to figure out who the witch is…to save the town…to save yourself, Henry and – and Mia." A look of regret and longing washed over Neal's face. "You'll get Henry's memories back and he'll remember me, but Mia…I want to meet her before I die. I want her to know who her father is."
Emma looked at him sadly. "Neal…"
"Please, Emma."
Emma sighed. She couldn't say no to him - not when he was going to die for all of them…not ever really, but still… "She doesn't believe in magic. What if you turn into your dad again? It'll scare her."
"I was okay in the hospital though, right? Maybe it's just because my dad's in the woods and we're close to him," Neal mused. "I'll go back to the hospital."
"Okay, fine," Emma agreed with reluctance in her voice. "I'll take you back to the hospital and then I'll go get Mia. What are we going to tell her?"
"I…I want her to know who I am…that I'm her dad and I would have been there for her…"
"But you didn't know," Emma said with a small sigh. "I didn't tell you."
"Hey, it's not all on you, Emma. I didn't exactly leave a forwarding address when I left," Neal acknowledged.
"No…you didn't."
Neal looked down. "I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry, too," Emma said quietly.
"You, uh, you think our daughter will forgive us?" Neal asked anxiously.
Emma bit her bottom lip uncertainly…she was scared Mia would never forgive her. "I don't know," she finally said, shaking her head. "But it's not going to be us, not today…just you. If she thought I kept Henry and gave her up, she would never understand."
Neal nodded. "So what's our story?"
"I found you…you're her dad. You're dying from natural causes, but you wanted to meet her before…before you die." Emma hoped she was doing the right thing. It seemed cruel to introduce Mia to Neal when he was going to die, but Emma thought it was worse for her to never know him.
"If you're trying to take me shopping again, I'm not going. You got me enough already." Mia stared at Emma with her arms crossed in front of her, refusing to get in the yellow Bug.
"That's not…" Emma sighed, not knowing how to do this…how to tell Mia that Neal was dying. "Look, you know I've been trying to find your birth parents?"
Mia froze. Her eyes got big and round. It looked like she was holding her breath.
Emma swallowed back guilt for what she was about to tell the girl - and what she couldn't tell her…yet. "I found your birth father. His name is Neal Cassidy. But he's- well…he's sick."
"You found him? What- what do you mean sick? He's going to be okay, right?" Mia needed her to say Neal would be okay – and she really wanted to…but she couldn't.
"I'm sorry," Emma said sadly. "He…doesn't have a lot of time left, but…he wants to meet you if you're up for it."
"Oh…" Mia's face fell and it looked like she might cry.
"Do you want to meet him?" Emma wouldn't force her to if she didn't want to…not even for Neal.
Mia blinked back the tears that had formed in her eyes. "I…yeah, I do," she stammered.
Emma nodded slowly. "Come on then, get in."
Mia's eyes widened. "What? Now?"
Emma knew it was now or never if she was really going to separate Neal and Gold…and that was what Neal wanted. "If you want to meet him, yeah…it has to be now."
Mia stared out the passenger window as Emma drove. She could feel the woman's eyes on her, but she didn't meet her gaze. She was fighting back tears. She wasn't going to cry in front of Emma…not about this.
Mia didn't know why she felt like she was losing her dad when she'd never really had him to begin with. No, he wasn't her dad…he was just a stranger she happened to share DNA with. But why was she so upset then?
It was a short drive to the hospital. Storybrooke just wasn't that big and traffic was almost nonexistent. Emma's yellow Volkswagen Bug was one of the only cars on the road.
Mia let Emma sling an arm around her shoulder and lead her into the hospital. Emma didn't stop to ask what room Neal was in…she must have known already. The woman stopped just outside of a hospital room at the end of a long hallway.
"He's in there. Are you ready?" Emma asked gently.
Mia looked at Emma…she wanted Emma to go in with her for some reason she didn't understand…she was used to being alone – it shouldn't have bothered her. "You- you're not coming?"
Emma blinked slowly. "I…can if you want me to."
Mia nodded almost frantically. She didn't like being so…so needy, but somehow she knew Emma wouldn't say no.
"Okay, then. Let's go."
They walked into the room together. A man was sitting upright in the hospital bed. He had dark brown hair and kind brown eyes. He didn't look sick. He wasn't pale – Emma and Mia were both paler than he was. He wasn't hooked up to tubes or monitors or anything. And he didn't look that old…he looked maybe a few years older than Emma.
"Mia, right?" The man…Neal – no, her father - said anxiously. He was staring at her…almost like he was trying to memorize all of her features.
Mia wanted to say something, but her mind was a complete blank. She didn't know what to say to Neal…she didn't even know him. And he was sick…he was dying. The things she really wanted to say seemed too harsh to say to someone who was dying.
"Mia, this is Neal…your father," Emma told her.
"So…you're my dad," Mia said awkwardly.
"Yeah…I am. It's nice to meet you. Sorry it took so long." Was he serious?
Mia stared at him coldly and scoffed scathingly. "Almost thirteen years is long?"
"Mia, that's not fair. He didn't know," Emma spoke up from behind her.
Mia looked from Emma to Neal. She didn't know how Emma could possibly know that or why she was defending Neal. "Is that…is that true? My mom – she didn't tell you?"
Neal hesitated, looking very conflicted. "It's…complicated. I left your mom. I didn't know she was pregnant…I never would have left if I had known…but I left her…left town. I…made it hard for her to tell me so she didn't."
As far as excuses went, Mia thought that was a lame one. "What, you didn't have cell phones back then?"
"No, I did, but…I didn't take it with me when I left. The number your mom had for me was disconnected," Neal explained.
Mia studied him carefully. "You wouldn't have left if you'd known?"
"No. My father – he abandoned me when I was a kid. I never would have done that to my kid – to you…you have to believe me," Neal said fiercely.
"I believe you, but it doesn't change anything. For almost thirteen years I've been alone…and now…I just found you and you're-" Mia bit her lip to stop herself from saying he was dying.
"It's okay…you can say it – I'm dying. You can be angry. I wouldn't blame you if you are…I know I would be."
"You're really dying?" Mia asked in a small voice. She hated how weak she sounded. "You know…all the times I thought about what it would be like if I ever met my parents, I never thought I'd meet my dad when he was on his death bed. I…don't know what to say. I just met you, like, five minutes ago and now I have to say goodbye." And she would still be alone…life really wasn't fair.
"I know, I'm sorry. I didn't want to make things any harder on you than they already are," Neal said earnestly. "I just…wanted you to know who I am."
"Well, now I do, but I still don't know you."
"What do you want to know? You can ask me anything. Come on, you've got to have questions."
Mia had a hundred questions. She didn't know anything about her parents – who they were, why they didn't want her, how her dad had even impregnated her mom in the twenty-first century when they had inventions like the morning after pill… But it seemed like maybe…just maybe they would have kept her if her dad hadn't left her mom. "Why did you leave my mom?"
"I know this sounds stupid, but I did it for her. A, uh, friend of hers thought I was no good for her. She had this big destiny, and he thought I was stopping her."
"What big destiny? Is she, like, a famous singer or actress or something?"
"No, she was just…meant to do more than what we were doing."
Mia rolled her eyes. "What were you doing?"
Neal glanced at Emma nervously. He said she could ask him anything…he didn't need Emma's permission to answer…Emma wasn't her mother.
"You said I could ask you anything," Mia said in annoyance.
"Okay, we were, uh, on the road…sleeping in a car…or a motel if we were lucky. Neither of us was exactly working."
Mia was not very impressed, but then she'd never expected to be…she didn't expect Claire and Phil Dunphy - she wouldn't be in foster care if her parents had been able to take care of her. "How old were you?"
"Seventeen…we were seventeen," Neal answered after a second.
"I knew my birth mom was Juno…except Juno actually made sure her kid had a home," Mia muttered under her breath. "Did you guys meet in high school?"
"Nope. She tried to steal my car," Neal said with a grin.
Emma shot him a look…she must think Neal was giving her ideas.
"I don't even know how to drive. I'm not going to steal a car," Mia told the woman, hoping Neal would tell her more…even if Emma didn't want him to. She had to know what happened next. "She really tried to steal your car?"
"Yeah, only I was sleeping in the backseat. Just our luck – a cop pulled us over. I, uh, gave her the keys and talked the cop into letting us go with a warning."
"Do you always help people who try to steal from you?" Mia asked with laughter in her voice. As far as stories of how they met went, Mia had to admit it was a good one…way better than the scenario she'd imagined of them meeting in high school. Her dad actually seemed pretty cool. She didn't want to like him…but she was starting to.
"Nah, just the pretty thieves. You got any other questions?"
"Were you in love with her?" Mia asked.
"I was, yeah. I think a part of me will always love her."
Mia chewed on her bottom lip as she tried to reconcile the man sitting in front of her who was saying he would always love her mom with the image in her head of a seventeen year old that left her mom pregnant and alone…she couldn't. "What happened the last time you saw her?"
Emma was surprised Mia wanted her to go in with her…she thought the girl would want some time alone with Neal.
When Mia started out angry, Emma tried to defend Neal. She didn't want the girl to say anything she would regret later. When Henry got his memories back, he would have good memories of Neal…Neal buying him his first slice of New York pizza, Neal showing him around Manhattan, having cocoa at Granny's, play sword fighting in Storybrooke, Neal telling him about life in the Enchanted Forest. But this…this would be Mia's only real memory of Neal – and Emma wanted it to be a good memory…for Mia and for Neal.
Neal either didn't get what she was trying to do or just wasn't going to let her because he told Mia that he left and his cell phone number was disconnected. Emma understood why he did what he did now, but that didn't mean Mia would understand. Mia did at least seem to believe Neal when he said he wouldn't have left if he had known about her, but she was still angry.
Neal did a pretty good job fielding Mia's questions without lying or saying anything about magic – even when he gave her destiny as his reason for leaving her. Emma was impressed, but she wasn't too surprised…Neal had always been a smooth-talker.
"I knew my birth mom was Juno…except Juno actually made sure her kid had a home," Mia said after asking how old they were. Emma flinched…her daughter was so angry and bitter. "Did you guys meet in high school?"
"Nope. She tried to steal my car," Neal said with an obnoxious shit-eating grin.
Emma shot him a look. It wasn't his car…he just stole it first. She bit her tongue to stop herself from reminding him of that...Mia didn't know she was the car thief in question.
"I don't even know how to drive. I'm not going to steal a car," Mia assured her, misinterpreting the look. The girl looked at Neal eager for more. "She really tried to steal your car?"
"Yeah, only I was sleeping in the backseat. Just our luck – a cop pulled us over. I, uh, gave her the keys and talked the cop into letting us go with a warning," Neal said smugly.
Mia giggled. "Do you always help people who try to steal from you?"
"Nah, just the pretty thieves. You got any other questions?"
"Were you in love with her?" Mia asked. Emma thought she knew the answer, but she really wished their twelve year old hadn't opened that can of worms.
"I was, yeah. I think a part of me will always love her." Emma knew a part of her would always love him, too, but it wasn't easy to love him…it felt like every time she let herself love him, she lost him – and she knew she was going to lose him again when she separated him from Gold.
"What happened the last time you saw her?"
Emma inhaled sharply. She frantically tried to catch Neal's eye, but he was completely oblivious.
"I gave her a watch."
Little alarm bells went off in Emma's head. Mia knew she'd gone to prison for her boyfriend's crime - and she knew what the crime was. If he said anything about stealing the watches…
"You gave her a watch?" Mia repeated, giving him a quizzical look.
"Okay, I think it's time to go…your dad's sick…he needs his rest." Emma tried desperately to get Mia out of there before Neal said anything else.
"No, it's okay, Emma. She deserves to know what I did. You know how I told you I left your mom? Well, that's not the whole story." Neal winced, knowing he was the bad guy in this story. "I, uh, left her to go to prison for something I did. The watch I gave her – it was stolen...and it wasn't the only one."
Mia turned to Emma and gave her a questioning look, but Emma felt like she couldn't breathe…much less give her the answer she needed. She could almost see the girl connecting the dots. "Didn't – didn't your boyfriend do that to you?"
"You told her?" Neal had a look on his face that clearly said oh, shit. He didn't know Mia knew about the damn watches. It wasn't his fault…he couldn't have known – and Emma didn't think she had to tell him...she never thought he would tell Mia…he hadn't been happy that she told Henry. He didn't want his kids to think he was a jerk.
Mia whipped around to look at Neal. "You…know each other. Who did you impregnate when you were seventeen?"
"Me…you're my daughter," Emma finally choked out.
Mia turned to her, but wouldn't actually look at her. "How long have you known? Have you known this whole time?"
"No. I didn't know when we met."
"I don't – I don't understand. You have a kid…Henry," Mia stammered.
"Henry's…your twin. I know how hard this is to understand-"
"It's…not actually," Mia cut her off with hurt in her voice. "I'm not that good at math, but I've got addition and subtraction down. You had two kids. You gave up one kid. Now you have one kid."
Mia turned to run, but Emma knew she would run and had strategically positioned herself in between the girl and the door. She caught the girl's thin arm when she tried to push past her and held her there gently. "Hey-"
"Don't touch me!" Mia shrieked. She tried unsuccessfully to pull her arm free from Emma's hand.
Emma adjusted her grip a little – not hard enough to bruise…just enough that the girl wouldn't be able to break away no matter how hard she pulled. "Whoa, wait a minute. There's someone dangerous in Storybrooke…people have been disappearing. We don't have to talk, but you can't run, okay?"
"No, it's not okay. Let me go. You did it once before…it shouldn't be that hard to do it again." Mia's voice cracked with emotion.
Emma looked her straight in the eyes, hoping her daughter would know she meant this. "And I regret it. I'm not going to do it again."
Mia glared. "You can't keep me here. That's kidnapping."
"You're our kid," Neal reminded her.
"I'm not your kid…I'm not anyone's kid. I'm property of the government." Mia had tears in her eyes and the most heartbreaking expression Emma had ever seen.
"If you don't want to be with us right now, you can spend some time with Mary Margaret," Emma said carefully. She wanted to scream that Mia was her kid, but she knew how Mia felt all-too-well. Her daughter had been alone for twelve years plus. She'd never had parents. She may have Emma now – for all of five minutes, but the little girl felt like what she'd always been - an orphan. It was how Emma felt in Neverland…how she still felt sometimes – a lot of the time actually. Emma was going to be the girl's mom now, but it would take time for Mia to feel like a daughter…time Emma knew she had to give her.
"I don't need a fucking babysitter."
"Hey," Neal said, looking shocked by the harsh language coming from a little girl. Emma wasn't…she'd heard Mia talk like that before – well, not exactly like that, but close enough. "Emma's right. It's not safe for you out there alone."
"Mia, I know it's hard for you to see it, but I'm just trying to protect you. That's what mothers do. Please let me do it," Emma pleaded.
"Go protect Henry," Mia muttered bitterly.
Emma knew it would be hard no matter when Mia found out, but it was even harder because she thought Emma kept Henry and gave her up. She wanted to explain, but she didn't know how to explain when neither kid believed in magic. She let out a frustrated sigh. "I can protect both of you."
"Oh, now you want to protect me? It's too late. Where were you when I was living with Trey? Or…when I was eleven and my foster mom broke my arm?"
"Who the hell is Trey?" Neal asked in a low, dangerous voice.
Mia's eyes widened and she shook her head ever-so-slightly…she did not want Emma to answer that. Emma nodded…she wasn't going to lose what little trust her kid might have in her by telling a secret that wasn't hers to tell.
"You're right. I didn't protect you then, but I can protect you now - and I'm going to. I couldn't live with myself if anything else happened to you and I could have stopped it." Emma didn't know if she could live with herself as it was.
Mia took a deep breath. It looked like she was steeling herself for something. "Did you ever…think about keeping me?"
"Yes, I did," Emma said without hesitation.
"You kept Henry...obviously. I mean, is it – is it because I was sick?"
"You were sick?" Neal asked with concern in his voice.
Mia glanced at him. It looked like she was a little touched by the concern. "I…had this thing with my lungs. I was in the hospital for a little while…no one wants a sick baby. I'm fine now, but that's why I was never adopted."
Emma remembered seeing something about that in the girl's medical records. It explained a lot. Emma had asked questions because she didn't want her kids to go through what she had in the system - and what Mia had been through anyway. They had told her they had a great adoptive family lined up for Henry and Mia. "They had a family lined up for you…I didn't – I didn't know it didn't work out."
Mia was back to not looking at her. "Well, it didn't. I want to go. I'll go with Mary Margaret or whoever…I just want to go."
"Yeah, I'll drop you off."
"Wait!" Neal called out. "Look, I know I'm the jerk that abandoned you, but I'm still your father. This could be my last chance to give you fatherly advice."
"Seriously?" Mia scoffed. "Advice from a jewelry thief?"
Emma arched an eyebrow. "Really? You're judging him for stealing? Something tells me you've picked more than a few pockets."
"No…I'm judging him for letting you go to prison for it."
"He did that to me, not you. And for the record, I've forgiven him."
Neal cleared his throat nervously. "It, uh, took a long time before I could forgive my dad for what he did to me. I spent a lot of time running from him and when he found me, I didn't want anything to do with him. You don't have to forgive me, Mia - I'm not saying that…I've never forgiven myself for what I did to your mom and you and Henry. I know forgiveness ain't easy. I regret it now…all that time wasted when I was alone and I could've had a family. You don't have to be alone anymore. You don't have to forgive us – either of us. You can be angry. You can hate us. But don't walk away from this chance to have a family. In this life, family is the only thing that matters."
"I don't hate you…I could never hate you," Mia whispered. "But...I don't forgive you…I don't know if I ever will. I'm sorry."
"That's okay…you don't need to be sorry." Neal studied Mia. "You, uh, think I can have a hug before you go?"
Mia nodded. Emma let go of her arm and stood back as the girl walked over to the hospital bed and gave Neal a tentative hug. It looked like she was afraid she'd hurt him, but Neal held her tightly against his chest and murmured something Emma couldn't hear into her ear. Emma knew he was saying goodbye.
Author's Note: Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. As you can see, I tweaked the Neal storyline a little, but he is still going to die. I had a few ideas as to how Mia would find out Emma was her mom, but I liked this one the best and hope you guys liked how it played out. I'd love to hear what you think. Sorry Henry was missing from this chapter. He's an important part of this story and I wanted to add in at least one scene with him, but I thought it was a little too long as is and this was a good place to end it. I'm going to change things up a little bit with what Emma tells him about what's going on and it will give him some drama, too.