Chapter 11: Memories Volume One

"On your feet Sam. Now! Run!" Michael snapped, pulling the human to his feet and pulling him towards the nearby tree line.

Sam looked around trying to get his bearings but soon realized that this was not the time. He let Michael pull him along until they were in the brush hiding. Michael threw himself down over Sam, knowing his body could withstand more. A hail of gunfire swept the area followed by an explosion and the sound of machinery making Sam duck his head. After a few minutes the sounds moved away leaving Michael to push down gently on Sam's back.

"Wait here. I'll make sure it's clear." Michael said getting to his feet and checking the area. "Looks clear. You can come out."

Sam got up and dusted himself off and joined Michael in the clearing. Michael knelt down and checked on something before standing again. Looking down the hunter realized it was a young man who looked barely old enough for the soldier's uniform he was wearing. Sam took a step back and looked around, seeing that they were in the middle of a battlefield with bodies scattered everywhere.

"What the hell is going on?" Sam asked.

"World War Two by the look of things." Michael replied. "This young man is French. His uniform is that of the French Military worn during that time. We're somewhere near Sedan in France I think."

Sam blinked. "You can tell all that just by the uniform?"

"I'm Heaven's Warrior. It's my life." Michael said. "I can give you every battle human kind has ever fought in starting from the beginning until now. I can give you every weapon, tactic, casualty, and outcome without even blinking. The same way Gabriel does with his herbs."

"Gabriel! Where is he?!" Sam asked before realizing that it was just him and Michael. "Where's everyone else?"

"I don't know. I was looking for them when I found you." The First Born said. "I just hope everyone's okay."

"SAMMY!"

"DEAN! OVER HERE!"

Dean and Castiel ran up joining them. "Are you two okay?"

"We're fine Dean." Sam reassured.

"Where's Lucifer and Raphael?" Michael said looking around, feeling his chest go tight.

"We're here." Came Raphael's voice followed by a hiss of pain that was not from the Third Born.

Michael rushed over where he found the dark skinned angel supporting his bloodied mate. "Lucifer? Are you okay? What happened?"

"Would you believe a grenade?" The blonde asked. "I'm fine. Already healed. But there are Nazis all over the damn place. Why are we here?"

"These are Gabriel's memories right? Maybe he was here?" Raphael asked.

"Doing what? Fighting?" Dean scoffed. "No offense but Feathers isn't exactly the fighting type."

"Loki! Loki come back! You're going to get yourself killed!" Came a female voice.

"No! I want to help as many as I can!" Replied the very familiar voice.

They turned to see Gabriel slinking through the long grass of the battlefield. He was dressed as an army medic and moving steadily from person to person. Chasing behind him was a woman with long flowing blonde green hair that had various flowers woven through it. Her dress, if you could call it that, barely covered her and was nearly see through. She ran up to Gabriel and tugged on his arm.

"She's a Fee. A fairy that inhabits France." Raphael said, sounding shocked. "They never interact with anyone other then nature spirits. How the hell did Gabriel manage that?"

"Loki please! There is nothing you can do for them!" She said trying to pull him away.

"I have to try! Someone might still be alive!" He snapped trying to head for the next body.

"You and I both know the invading heathen leave none alive. We must hurry. They're coming back!" She said pulling harder on him.

"No! I have to try!" He snapped only to freeze at the sound of a heavy machine coming back towards them.

Michael turned and looked behind him and let out an actual curse. "Follow Gabriel. If that thing fires and we get caught in the blast it's over. That's a Panzer III tank."

Everyone moved, rushing towards the smaller blonde. Gabriel however seemed torn. He kept looking between the bodies of the fallen and the oncoming tank. It was clear that he wanted to find more survivors but with the German forces moving in there was nothing he could do. Gabriel finally let out a sob and headed for the tree line following the woman.

The group took off after him and as they hit the tree line there was the sound of the tank firing followed by nothing. Everything around them had changed. They were in a clearing with a small pool of crystal clear water and the sun was shining where moments ago it had been dusk. Gabriel took off his helmet and threw it, reveal his neatly buzzed hair, and let out an angry pain filled growl.

"Why?! Why?! There could have been more survivors out there Eglantine! I could have saved them! I could have helped them!" Gabriel shouted, tears filling his gold eyes.

"There was nothing you could have done Loki. You and I both know that." The woman, now known as Eglantine said softly, moving in close and hugging Gabriel to her chest as he broke down in tears. "Hush now. There is no need for tears."

"Most of them were just kids. They shouldn't be fighting!" Gabriel sobbed out, clinging to her. "The battlefield is no place for kids."

"I know but such is the way of man." She said. "Now rest. In the morning you should move on. To a place untouched by this blight. I hear that Australia is a wonderful place to visit this time of year."

"Then who will help them? If I don't help then-"

"Listen to me Archangel Gabriel, this war is not your war. You have no place in it. I know you follow your Father's will but you are no longer part of Heaven. Let this go. You do not have any reason to shoulder this burden." Eglantine said, kissing the top of his head before the world went fuzzy.

"Whoa...What hell now?" Dean asked as suddenly they were standing on the shoreline instead of a forest.

"We're going through Gabriel's memories." Lucifer said. "That was nothing more then a memory. This one probably is too."

There was a rush of water and Gabriel came rushing out of what appeared to be a tidal pool. It was such a shock to see that everyone just seemed to stand there for a moment staring. Gabriel was storming away looking both angry and upset and was halfway across the beach before any of them realized it. There was another rush of water and someone else appeared looking quite deranged.

"Oh Loki! I want to play some more!" Said the red haired man in a kilt. "Why are you running?"

Gabriel glared at the young man, his clothing somewhat torn and falling off him, and his hair coming loose from it's long braid, looking as though it had been grabbed and pulled on. "Fuck off Kyran! I told you that it's over!"

The man glared and let out a snarl and he came storming after the small blonde. "You don't tell me when it's over! I own you!"

"You don't own me! I'm not your property! I'm sorry I ever dated an asshole like you! What would your father say?" Gabriel spat, pulling out a dagger as he prepared to defend himself.

Kyran laughed, a falcata appearing in his hand. "Like my father is ever going to care about a washed up Norse defiler like you! Now come home so that I can tie you down to my bed and-"

Kyran's rant was cut short as a large spear went straight through his throat. Instead of blood rushing from the wound it appeared to be salt water. Gabriel seemed both shocked and horrified by what had just happened as the young man fell to the sand, clearly fighting to survive the inflicted wound. As the blonde moved forward to help he was stopped when a huge wave approached.

There was the sound of rushing water that filled the air as the wave hit the shore and a man walked out of it wearing traditional Celtic attire. His piercing sea blue gaze was fixed firmly on Kyran as he walked up to Gabriel and wrapped an arm tightly around him. As the young man began falling still the man turned away and began gently fixing Gabriel's clothing. The archangel tried to look behind him to Kyran but the man held him fast.

"Llyr...Why would you do that? Why kill him?! He was your son! Your own flesh and blood!" Gabriel snapped becoming more upset and agitated.

The man, now known as Llyr, hugged Gabriel to his chest, allowing the blonde to hide his frantic sobs. "He stopped being my son the minute he began raising his hand to you. I had already warned him, as had others, just what the consequences should be if he did it again. I loved Kyran but after hearing his words to you, and seeing the bruises he left on you, I feel I am justified in my actions."

"Why do this for me? I don't understand." Gabriel said, looking lost even as Llyr began fixing his hair, his clothes now mended and covering him properly once more.

"I did it for you because, unlike the others, I know who, and what, you are. Your secret shall ever be safe with me. I have heard tell of what was done to you by your own family." Llyr revealed. "Should you ever need sanctuary my realm is forever open to you Child of God."

Gabriel was silent for several minutes as his hair was neatly braided and tied into place once more. "My name is Gabriel." He whispered, his voice barely heard over the crashing ocean. "I am the Archangel Gabriel."

Llyr smiled softly at him. "It is my pleasure to met you, Archangel Gabriel. You are forever welcome in my seas."

Gabriel managed a nod before he collapsed, the stress of what had just happened proving too much for him, and Llyr rushed to catch him. The scene changed again and this time the two humans were left feeling very out of place. Around them was nothing more pure white. It slowly began to change into that of a large open field. Sam and Dean both looked around, feeling like they should know where they were but at the same time they weren't sure at all.

"I know this place." Sam said softly. "I can't remember where though."

"Yeah I know what you mean." Dean agreed. "I swear I've been here before."

"This is near Sioux Falls." Castiel said. "We're not far from Bobby's house."

"Oh yeah!" Dean said. "I know this place. Bobby took us pheasant hunting remember Sammy?"

"Oh yeah! Matthew Tibbler's place right?" Sam said. "Why are we here? I doubt Gabriel was ever here. Unless it was for some pranks but I doubt Bobby would have let him get away with it."

The four angels looked at each other before Michael let out a sigh. "This isn't really Sioux Falls. This is Heaven." Michael explained. "Whatever we're about to see took place in Heaven. For some reason though it's appearing as someplace you've been to since-"

"Humans can't see heaven. Yeah. Joshua made sure we understood that." Dean snapped. "So what the hell? I don't see anything."

There was a brilliant flash that lit up the sky, making everything turn white for a moment. The flash was followed by an ear splitting scream. It was so raw and pain filled that it made Dean, Sam, and Castiel frown. The archangels however, looked horrified. Michael turned pale and looked like he was going to be sick. Lucifer was even worse, he was pale and shaking and he looked on the verge of collapse. Raphael seemed torn, as if he didn't know which brother to go to. Luckily Sam was there next to Lucifer before anyone else could move, leaving Raphael to take care of his eldest brother.

"Lucifer, are you okay?" Sam asked coming over to steady the blonde.

Lucifer clung to Sam and shook his head. "I can't...Please don't make me...I can't...I can't watch him die again!"

Sam frowned before he realized what Lucifer was referring to. "Is this when Razael-"

Sam could finish because he had to rush to catch the Devil as his legs gave out. Since none of them moved towards the painful memory it seemed that the memory had moved to accommodate them. Sam easily recognized Lucifer, having seen the Devil's previous dark haired vessel before. He was laying on the ground, splattered with blood that wasn't his own and his face was ashen and horror struck. There was a thin man with dark blue eyes and dark brown hair that was half pulled back into braid, also ashen faced but he seemed to be in a state of horrified disbelief. Both were staring at the same spot.

Gabriel was kneeling in the dirt, blood covering the ground, him, and the young man that was laying in his arms. The dark haired young man was wheezing softly in Gabriel's arms, his chest rising and falling sporadically as he struggled for breath. The youngest archangel was sobbing, his hands glowing as he channeled his power, trying to heal the gaping wound that started just under his son's rib cage and continued until just above his navel. The young man's hand was digging into Gabriel's golden feathers while his own blue feathers lay scattered about them and were slowly bursting into flame one by one.

"Just hold on Raz. I'm here. It's going to be okay." Gabriel assured his son before turning to glare up at Michael through his tears. "What the fuck is wrong with you Michael?!"

"Gabriel this..this was...it was an accident. I swear! I never meant to hurt anyone!" Michael said, looking on the verge of tears.

"He told you! Razael told you not to use it! He told you this would happen! He said the spells in the Lexicon were dangerous and should never be used! Why didn't you fucking listen?!" The brunette snapped.

"I didn't...I didn't think..." Michael was growing pale and looking like he was about to vomit.

"You never fucking think!" The younger archangel snapped before turning back to his son. "It's okay Raz. Just hang on okay? I have you."

"Mom...D-dad...is he?" Razael wheezed out, his voice weak.

Gabriel looked up at Lucifer, who was slowly trying to crawl his way over to the two. "He's okay. He's weak but he's okay. I promise."

Razael nodded and he began going limp. "I'm...I'm so...glad..."

Gabriel began to panic; it was clear that Razael was fading fast. "No! Come on Raz! Stay with me okay? Just..Stay with me. I can fix this. I can help you but your can't give up. Not now."

"Mom...Dad...I...love...you..." Razael whispered out, his body going limp as he whispered out the final word.

A broken sob left Gabriel. "No...Please no...Raz come on, you can't do this to me. Open your eyes Raz. Please. Don't...Don't give up on me please..."

Michael let out a strangled noise. "Razael?"

Lucifer let out a harsh noise that was somewhere between a sob and a scream, tears running down his face before he hung his head, his fingers digging into the blood stained ground. Gabriel was sobbing brokenly, clinging to his son's body, his hands still glowing, trying to force life into the pale and cooling body. A tall slim man with blonde hair and green eyes appeared behind Gabriel and began gently pulling him away from Razael's body.

"He's gone Gabriel. I'm sorry. He's gone. Let him go." The man said softly.

Michael took a step closer and Gabriel flew from the man's hold and attacked Michael, hitting and punching him in the chest but his attacks were more pain driven and Michael barely flinched, his dark blue eyes drawn to Razael's unmoving body. The tall blonde came over and pulled Gabriel off of his older brother which seemed to enrage the brunette even more.

"Let me go Dad! I'm going to kill him! He has to pay! Look what he did! He killed my son! That was my son Michael! You're a murderer! He was just a child! He was just a child! He never should have been here! You killed him! You...You killed him! My son...my son...he's dead. Dad...he's gone! No...not my son...my son...Dad...please...I want him back..."

Gabriel sobbed into his father's chest as Chuck held him tight. "I'm sorry Gabriel. I'm so sorry. You should never have felt this kind of pain. I'm sorry."

"Dad...please...I want him back..." Gabriel sobbed, his voice breaking horribly as he collapsed against his father. "Please...bring him back...I'm begging you...please..."

Tears filled those green eyes as Chuck held his youngest archangel tighter. "I'm sorry Gabriel. You know I can't. I'm sorry..."

Michael stepped forward, blood decorating his front from Gabriel's attack. "Gabby...I never...I never meant for this to happen. I never wanted to hurt you this way. This was an accident. Razael-"

"SHUT UP!" Gabriel scream, fighting his father's embrace once more. "Don't you ever speak his name again Michael! If you do I swear I'll kill you!"

"Gabriel I swear I never meant for this to happen!" Michael pleaded.

Gabriel fell still in his father's embrace, but his golden gaze was cold as ice and his face was completely blank, giving him a sinister look. "Know this Michael. I will never forgive you for this. I can only hope that one day you'll know this pain I feel. When that day comes you'll find no help from me."

Everything faded to gray and everyone was silent until Dean spoke up. "Does anyone else feel like we don't belong here? And not just because we're going through memories I doubt Gabe ever wanted us to see. I mean I feel like this isn't right."

Castiel frowned and tilted his head. "I feel it too. I think we're in the wrong place."

"How so?" Sam asked, keeping Lucifer close, the blonde archangel shaking with his face buried in the hunter's chest.

"It feels like we're not in the right place. Like we're nowhere close to him." Dean said. "All of these memories...they've all been about the same thing. Gabriel losing something. Maybe we're in the wrong set of memories."

"So then we find a happier set. Maybe he's there." Sam said before frowning. "How...How do we do that though?"

"We simply change our train of thought." Raphael said. "We came in here upset because of what happened. We need to empty ourselves of all the negative emotions we feel and focus on positive ones."

"Think happy thoughts huh?" Dean said with a glare. "Alright then. What have we got to lose? So we think happy thoughts and everything should change then rights? We'll see new memories?"

Raphael nodded, helping his eldest brother get to his feet once more, Michael's face still somewhat ashen. "It's easy for us angels but how easy will it be for humans?"

"Fuck you." Dean said. "We've got this right Sam?"

Sam nodded. "We do. For Gabriel."