Garrus had not seen or spoken to Shepard or Wrex since the morning after their night out at Purgatory. He had spent their shore leave on the Citadel catching up with some of his former coworkers at C-sec, shopping for some new calibration supplies, and staying at his apartment. He wasn't actively avoiding the crew, but he didn't want to hear whatever crude things Wrex was going to say about what he had seen Shepard and him doing, and he was going to see plenty of the Normandy and its crew for the next few weeks, if not months.

Feeling an odd sense of pent up frustration, sexual and otherwise, he had gone out with Chellick and some of the other turians from C-sec on their last night on the Citadel, in the hopes of meeting someone to release some of the tension with. There was a mostly turian bar they sometimes went to in the wards, classier than Chora's Den, but still a dive by most standards. He found it was nice to be around turians for a while, after so many days surrounded by Alliance humans.

At the bar, there were plenty of options to choose from. Garrus was not unattractive by turian standards, and he knew as much, though he never acted like it. He'd never had a hard time attracting women, at any rate. Halfway through the night, he and Chellick made their way across the bar to a table full of women. They were out celebrating before a bond-mating ceremony for the loudest and most inebriated of the group. Most species had this tradition, interestingly enough. Humans called them 'bachelorette parties', but it was the same idea. The only species he knew of that didn't partake in such traditions were the salarians, but they were strange about mating in general.

Garrus and Chellick spent most of the night vying for the attention of the same female, but Chellick was too drunk to win in the end. Garrus didn't quite have the stomach for excessive drinking after the night at Purgatory, and he was never very pleased with his performance when he drank too much, and usually neither was his partner.

Eventually, Chellick went to sit down and Garrus was left alone with the woman they'd been pursuing, whose name was Minia. She was nearly as tall as Garrus, muscular, with green clan markings that ran in stripes down either side of her face. After a lot of small talk, they eventually moved to the dance floor, then, after a while, to his apartment.

The evening had served its intended purpose when it was over. He'd been able to release some mounting tension in the arms of a fairly proficient lover. It had been enjoyable, but something about it left Garrus wanting, and he couldn't put his finger on it. It wouldn't do to dwell on it though, so he pushed it to the back of his mind.

Turians weren't awkward about casual sex; Minia stayed the night and slept with him again in the morning before she left to meet up with her friends. There were no awkward goodbyes, no feigned promises of seeing each other again, no meaningless exchange of numbers. She simply pecked him on the mandible, thanking him for a good time, and left.

By the time Minia left, it was nearly time for the Normandy to disembark, so Garrus gathered up his belongings and headed for the docks. He had enjoyed some time away from the humans, but he was eager to get back to the ship. In fact, he realized as he made his way down the docks toward the Normandy, that he had actually missed his squad mates. He'd never felt the same way about his coworkers at C-sec.

The Alliance vessel was a welcome sight at the end of the docks; as he entered the airlock and stepped onto the ship, it felt almost like coming home. It confirmed for him that joining Shepard's crew had been the right choice.

Entering the bridge, he found Shepard hunched over Joker's chair with Pressly next to them, discussing the route to Noveria as well as some intel from an admiral named Hackett. Shepard smiled at Garrus for a brief moment before returning to her conversation.

He was curious about how Shepard's trip to the museum with Liara had gone, but since she was busy, he would have to ask her about it later. He decided he would head down to the cargo bay and unload the additional items he'd purchased during his stay.

The descent down to the cargo bay was laboriously slow. He hadn't missed the Normandy's elevators, though the elevators on the Citadel were not remarkably fast themselves. When the doors opened onto the cargo bay after what felt like an eternity, Garrus was unhappy to see Wrex was already stationed next to the mako, his back propped against a wheel while he read.

The krogan looked up at Garrus' arrival and smirked.

"Hey, loverboy, how was your shore leave?"

"For the last time, Wrex, it was just a bit of curiosity…" Garrus sighed, dropping his things on his cot.

"It was weird, whatever it was."

Ash was over at her weapons maintenance station, but she turned around upon overhearing their conversation, and crossed the room to join in.

"What happened?" She asked eagerly.

Garrus would have been glad she was willingly talking to them by herself, but he didn't want to answer any questions about the whole awkward affair.

"Nothing."

"Not nothing," Wrex insisted. "After we went out to that bar and you all got drunk embarrassingly fast, I had to carry Garrus and Shepard back to his apartment because they blacked out. When I woke up the next morning, they were standing over me groping each other."

Garrus' subharmonics rumbled involuntarily. "That's not what was happening."

Ashley was staring at them with a look somewhere between horrified and amused. She made a strange noise that might have been a laugh or a cough. "What!?"

Garrus groaned. "Wrex is just being crude," he didn't want to have to explain the whole thing, because he didn't think an explanation made what he and Shepard had been doing any less weird, but now that Wrex had brought it up he felt he had to explain himself. "I wasn't wearing a shirt when I woke up. Turians don't sleep with clothes on! I was only wearing pants because I know how weird humans are about nudity because all their parts hang out."

Ash stopped him. "Wait, what?"

"Turians don't have any parts. They're like dolls," Wrex laughed.

"We're not like…really?" Garrus was getting frustrated. "Everything's…internal," he said.

"Seriously? How do you…how does it come out?"

"Why are we having this conversation!?" Garrus groaned.

Wrex let out a boisterous laugh. "This is amazing," he said.

He didn't anticipate having to give the gunnery chief a lesson on dextro anatomy, but she was undoubtedly going to keep asking questions if he didn't explain it. "We have plating on our lower abdomen…it just…slides to accommodate things when…well…"

"When he's turned on," Wrex finished for him.

Ash let out a laugh and covered her mouth. "I'm sorry, really, it's just so strange…"

"Stranger than a penis that's just constantly exposed, dangling between your legs?" Garrus folded his arms. Levos thought dextro genitals were weird?

"Okay, but so then how do you go to the bathroom if you have to be uh…aroused to get it out?" Ash asked, a slight red flush coming to her cheeks.

"Well I mean I can make it come out," Garrus shrugged. He was still in disbelief that the conversation was happening. "It just won't be…"

"It'll be limp," Wrex finished.

"Wow," Ash said. "I'm learning so much. Okay, so get back to the story. You were groping the commander?"

"Groping," Wrex nodded.

"No!" Garrus snarled. "I wasn't groping her. I just didn't have a shirt on and she asked me about my cowl because she'd never seen one without clothes on it and then I asked her about her hair because turians don't have hair, so we both agreed to let each other touch them to see what they felt like."

Ash looked from Wrex to Garrus several times. "That's weirder than if you had just been groping her."

"It's not that weird!" Garrus complained, though he knew it was. "You're both being childish."

They were both laughing by that point, but Ash stopped herself. "You're right, I'm sorry, Garrus. It is weird though." She hesitated a moment and then, with a look of complete seriousness, said, "Can I see what it looks like?"

"What? Excuse me?" Garrus was taken aback.

"Your cowl…and the plates, not like…not it." She said, with additional meaning added by her emphasis. His mind had immediately gone to that, not his cowl.

"Oh fine, whatever. Turians aren't embarrassed by nudity," Garrus groaned, unzipping his suit and stepping out of his clothes.

"Krogan aren't either if you want to see my quad," Wrex offered.

"Pass," Ash held up her hand.

Garrus stood in front of them, completely naked. There was nothing inherently embarrassing about it, all of his parts were safely enclosed behind his plating, but he still felt awkward wearing only his gloves.

"Weird," Ash's eyes roved up and down his body, so foreign to her.

"Thanks," he replied bitingly.

"Sorry, I don't mean…it's just so different."

Garrus supposed a naked human body would probably be less foreign to him than his body was to her, having seen naked asari before. He guessed the general idea was fairly similar.

"Er…am I…interrupting something?" Tali had emerged from the engineering room. She stood staring at Garrus.

He hurried to pull his clothes back on, though Tali, of all the crew members, would probably be the most understanding considering she was also a dextro. Wrex let out an enormous laugh and Ash flushed red.

"Ash didn't know dextros have internal...uh...parts," Garrus explained, zipping his suit back up.

"Whatever you say," Tali said, a note of laughter in her voice.

Garrus huffed and stomped petulantly over to his cot. He had anticipated a bit of lighthearted ribbing from Wrex, but he hadn't expected to be standing naked in front of half of the squad.

"I was only joking around," Wrex said after a few minutes of stony silence on Garrus' part.

Garrus softened up a bit. "It's fine. I know." He pulled out some of the calibration equipment he bought from his bag. "I'm going to get back to work on the mako."

His acknowledgement of Wrex's apology seemed to clear any tension in the air. He just hoped Wrex wouldn't bring up the awkward scene in his apartment again.

Shepard paced the length of the observation deck nervously, her stomach in knots. The Normandy had begun its journey to Noveria, and she had asked Kaidan to meet her up on the deck when he had a spare moment. She was taking Garrus' advice and hoping to nip the situation in the bud.

She had been nervous like this before big battles, but never with men. She wasn't the most emotional person, however, and discussing actual romantic feelings was something she usually avoided. She was absolutely dreading the awkward conversation she knew she had to have with Kaidan, but it would only be worse the longer she waited. And she was a commander, after all; it was her duty to be straight with her crew members.

The elevator chirped and Shepard stopped in her tracks. Her heart was pounding in her ears. Why was she so nervous? Was it because she did genuinely care about Kaidan as a friend and fellow officer? Maybe that was it. She didn't want to have to hurt his feelings. But he was a soldier, surely he would understand…she would have to frame it that way.

The doors opened and Kaidan stepped out, beaming at the her. The poor bastard didn't have a clue. In fact, he probably thought she'd called him up here to confess her feelings. Maybe she wasn't giving him enough credit though, she had stayed behind with Garrus when he'd gone to dance at the bar. Was that a strong enough signal? She was skeptical even as she thought it.

"Shepard, what's up?" he asked, sitting down next to where she stood.

She paced in front of him and sighed. "Look, Kaidan, this isn't easy."

The smile slowly slid off his face. "Is something wrong?"

She forced herself to stop pacing, occupying her nervousness by wringing her hands. "We've known each other a long time, Kaidan. And I hope you know that I consider you a friend. And that's…it's really saying a lot because, you know, I have a hard time really connecting with a lot of people. But I mean we've been through a lot together…" She hated when other people rambled, so why was she doing it now? It was clear the line of a relationship that was too personal had already been crossed.

"Shepard," Kaidan interrupted her. "Just say what you have to say."

She took a deep breath. "I know that you have feelings for me, Kaidan."

"Oh," he exhaled slowly. "Okay…well…I admit it. If this is about the other night at Purgatory, it'd be great if you could just forget anything I said or did…we were both drunk. It's true, I…I'm attracted to you, Shepard. You're brave and confident and I find that really appealing. It's kind of surprising to see you acting so nervous. I probably would have just kept my feelings to myself though, if you hadn't said anything."

Some of the nervousness began to ebb. This was just a frank discussion with an old friend. For some reason, she hadn't expected Kaidan to take it so well. She had just been picturing those big eyes of his ripping her heart in two.

She sat down next to the lieutenant and spoke again.

"You're a great guy, Kaidan. I don't want to spout off a bunch of platitudes about how it's not you, it's me, or whatever. I just want to be honest with you about things. I don't feel the same way about you as you feel about me. I wish I did. I should. You're a handsome man, smart, funny, probably the nicest person I know. I just…can't change how I feel."

Kaidan surprised her by grabbing her hand and squeezing it. "Forgive me for the insubordination for a moment, Shepard. It's okay that you don't feel the same way. I kind of figured you didn't. I haven't been dropping hints, but I know sometimes I'm maybe not subtle about how I feel. Ash even asked me the other day if I was interested in you. I lied and said I wasn't. But I'm a grown man, Shep, I've been rejected before. It's really okay." He let go of her hand and smiled, though she could see a little bit of hurt in his eyes. It never felt good to be rejected.

"I'm glad you're being so understanding," she told him. "I guess I was nervous because I do care about you, as a friend. I didn't want to hurt your feelings, but I also didn't want things to progress and…" she shrugged. "I was worried maybe I was leading you on in some way?"

"How?" he cocked his head. "By being nice to me? By being my friend? I can tell the difference between flirting and being a good friend, Shepard."

She laughed. "It sounds stupid, now that I've said it out loud."

"It's not stupid. It's nice that you care and that you didn't want to hurt me. I would hate for this to come between us. I know you've never been very open about who you are or your past, but that's okay. Some of us are more comfortable with talking about that kind of thing than others. And…I mean, it goes without saying that it's okay if there's someone else, too."

"Someone else?" Shepard was confused by the statement.

"I just mean…if there's someone you're interested in, it's not going to upset me if you wanted to pursue that. Not that I'm exactly rooting for that to happen, but don't feel like you have to hide it on my account."

"There's nobody," Shepard assured him. She sometimes wished there was someone, even just a friend with benefits would be nice to have with so much time spent away from dock. If she had been a cruel person, she could even have seen herself with Kaidan in that circumstance, though never romantically. But she wasn't that kind of person and there wasn't anyone else. She wondered what he might be alluding to.

"Okay," he nodded, but didn't seem convinced.

"Do you think there's someone?"

He shook his head. "Forget I said anything. I was probably reading into things too much." He stood up and patted her back. "Thanks for the talk, Shepard. I'm glad we could air things out and be mature about it."

He started to walk away and she turned and called to him. "Kaidan!"

He stopped halfway to the elevator. "Yeah?"

"I'm not just saying this. You're the best lieutenant a commander could hope for. I really mean that."

He smiled, "Thanks, Shep."