I do not own Lucifer.
Lucifer pulled into the gas station parking lot during the heat of the day. Good thing they were both used to the feeling and couldn't feel it.
"Can our next car be bigger and have more comfortable seats?" Lilith asked, getting out of the car and stretching.
"Next car?"
"You were planning on driving up to Lux in this piece of junk?" She shook her head. "Like I said, losing your touch."
"Fine." He walked over to the trunk and popped it open. "How hard did you hit him, Lilith? He is still out cold. I would have thought the drive would have woken him up."
"Well, you do drive like an old person." Lilith commented, looking around.
"In any case, when he wakes up, he can be on his merry way," Lucifer said and began to head to the tiny store, Lilith was right behind him.
"Can I help you folks find something?" The man behind the counter asked, he looked at the pair hesitantly. Perhaps he thought they would rob him. "Did you two just leave a goth wedding?"
"I'll be outside." Lilith said, the store made her feel claustrophobic.
"Just got out of Hell actually." Lucifer wanted to tell the truth, he wanted a reaction.
"So a goth wedding, heard those could be hell. You need gas and supplies?" He seemed desperate to make a sale.
"Just a map, my good man. Where are we?" Lucifer asked, taking a step forward. But something caught his eye. "And this bag of Cool Ranch Doritos. And…" He should get something for Lilith, he wasn't sharing his snacks. Lucifer found a small package, perfect for her. "And these." He placed the two items on the counter beside the map.
"We are here." The man pointed to a small highway in Utah. "Where are you two heading?"
"Los Angeles."
"Well, you have a long drive ahead of you." He turned to the cash register. "Your total is $6.66."
Lucifer bit back a chuckle. "As much as I want to pay that, I have a better method of payment. What do you desire?"
The man looked at him confused. "What?"
Now it was time for Lucifer to work his magic. "Your deepest darkest desire. Come on, everyone has one."
The man paused, he did have one. But there was nothing dark about it. "I want this shop to be safe from robbers. I hate it when some punk comes in here demanding money."
"Well, bad move on your part having a store in the middle of nowhere. " Lucifer chimed in.
"Preaching to the choir."
No, there will be no preaching or choir." Those words actually hurt his ears. "But I can help you with your problem." He dug into his pocket and pulled out a coin. "This is a Archangel Michael coin. Keep it on the counter and no harm will come to the store."
The man took the coin and studied it. "Really? This is going to solve all my problems? It's magic."
"No, not magic. Holy. And Michael is not a guy who plays around, especially when it comes to protecting the innocent. You really should have seen him, leading the army, at his right hand was…" Lucifer stopped himself, he did not want to go down memory lane.
"Wow, thank you. Anything you and your date want, it's on the house."
"Sister and I'll pass the message along." Lucifer gathered his snacks and the map. He walked outside and saw Lilith sitting in a rocking chair on the front porch. Memory road indeed.
Her eyes were watching the road but turned to look at him when he held out the package to her. "Sugar free cookies? Really?"
"I don't want a repeat of last time." He said as he sat down next to her. He certainly did not want to see Lilith on a sugar high again. She had been smiling and unpredictable. It scared him, and coming from the devil that was saying something.
Lilith rolled her eyes but did take the package. She opened it and took a bite, which she promptly spit out. "Are you trying to kill me, again? That was horrible." She stood up and entered the shop.
Lucifer chuckled. Life wasn't boring with her around. He would actually prefer boring at this moment. They had a job that neither of them was thrilled about and with good reason. He began to carefully rock in the chair, a little quiet wouldn't hurt him.
Something Lilith said was stuck in his head. Had he lost his touch as the punisher of people's sins? Had he gone soft?
Then the truck of the stolen car flew open all the way and the owner carefully climbed out. He looked around confused, then he saw Lucifer. "You!? You kidnapped me! I'll have you arrested."
Lucifer considered standing up but decided he wasn't worth his time. "If we had kidnapped you, I wouldn't have left the truck open. And exactly why would I even want to kidnap you?"
"Ransom?" The shaken man answered.
"Can't imagine you would be worth that much." Lucifer pointed.
"That bitch knocked me out…"
Any worries that Lucifer had about going soft vanished. No one talked about his sister like that. Before the man could even finish his statement, Lucifer was in front of him, hand tight around his throat. "Now you crossed the line."
"You think I'm afraid of you?" The man asked, trying to save face and pry Lucifer's hands off his throat.
"How about now?" Then the poor soul saw Lucifer's true form, dark soulless eyes, red skull and the power of Hell behind it all.
The man screamed and feared for his life.
Lucifer kept talking. "Now I could kill you and you would spend the rest of time suffering like the piece of filth you are. But sadly, it's not my job to end your life. But just know what awaits you when you finally do die. Me." Lucifer let go of the man and he dropped to the ground. He quickly got into the car and drove off, leaving Lucifer in a cloud of dust.
Lucifer himself down and took out a cigarette. He still had it.
Lilith searched the whole store in silence before she found what she wanted. Cookies, the famous Oreos. She picked up two packs and brought them to the front counter.
"Those are on the house, your brother gave me this." The man held up the coin.
"Is that the Archangel coin? I didn't even know he had that." Lilith nodded to him.
"Are you two guardian angels? Like real angels?"
Lilith paused then gave him a small smile. "Not anymore." That was the cold hard truth. She exited the shop and didn't see the car they arrived in. "Lucifer, where's the car?"
"He drove away after I put the fear of… well me in him."
She raised an eyebrow. "You scared him? I don't believe that." She sat back down next to him and opened her cookies. They now had to pass the time until another car came by.
"What about that one?" Lucifer pointed to a green minivan.
"We are going to LA, not picking the kids up from soccer."
Ten minutes later
"What about that one?" Lilith pointed to a pickup truck.
"Are we rednecks now? I will not be seen in that thing."
The VW Beetle got vetoed. "Too tiny." So did the Hummer. "Human are destroying the planet fast enough, let's not rush it."
An hour after they pulled into the station and the siblings still didn't have a ride out. And it wasn't completely for lack of trying.
Lilith was resting her elbows on her knees when she saw it. "Wow, I wouldn't mind being seen in that…"
Lucifer followed her eyes. The black Corvette was sexy and sleek and very familiar. "That's my car." He growled and stood up.
Well, the license plate did say 'FALLIN1".
"Hello, hi, excuse me. How are you driving that car?" Lucifer wanted all the facts before giving out punishment.
"None of your business, buddy." The driver got out of the car and was trying to avoid Lucifer as he filled up the car.
Lucifer walked towards his car and shook his head. "Regular? You're putting regular gas into a corvette, are you out of your mind? And this is my car, so it is very much my business. I want to know how you came to be driving it. Then I'm taking it back." Lucifer laid out his plan.
"Go to Hell." The man tried to walk around Lucifer but a powerful grip on his shoulder stopped him.
"Been there, just came from there, actually. You're sweating, like a sinner in church. I know those personally. You look like you murdered someone." Lucifer observed, no response. "Oh, you did, didn't you? Murdered an innocent person? Not a good idea. Of very bad timing that I'm the first person you run into after committing that act. That forces me to punish you." He slammed the man against the gas pump.
Lilith watched, there was a sort of glee in her eyes. She loved this side of their fallen nature. Maybe he hadn't lost his touch.
Just as soon as Lucifer tightened his grip on the man and was ready to show his true form for the second time that day, the shop owner came running out. "The coin you gave me, it's spinning like crazy." And he noticed Lucifer ready to hurt a customer. He did not know what to think.
Lilith rolled her eyes. "Call the cops, I'll take care of him." She knew why the coin was acting up. Daddy now went for subtle sighs in recent days. Lilith walked over to Lucifer. "Hey, stop it."
"I'm in the middle of something, Lilith. See, I'm not going soft." Lucifer growled, he wanted to prove her wrong.
"I don't want you to stop but it's not my call. It's Daddy's."
"I'm doing what He sent me to do, now He wants me to stop? I can't win, can I?" He said more to himself.
"We have other jobs right now, you know that." Lilith sighed.
Lucifer dropped the man. "He always ruins my fun."
"Don't even think about moving." Lilith told the man on the ground.
The police showed up twenty minutes later. The lead officer walked over to Lucifer, wanting to know the full story.
"This man stole my car and he committed a murder somewhere. I didn't know it was stolen, I have been out of town for a while. There should be paperwork in the glove compartment."
The officer went to the car. "Lucifer Morningstar? Do you have identification?" Lucifer pulled out his wallet, thankful he had it. "Law enforcement has been looking for this car for month. Are you heading back to LA?"
"Yes, we are."
The officer put the thief/ murderer in the back of the squad car and drive off. This left the siblings alone with the shop owner and now a way to leave.
"That was eventful. Safe travels." The owner told them before going back inside.
Lucifer got into the driver's seat of his own car. It felt good to have something familiar, something that felt like home.
Lilith opened the passenger door and slid in. "No, I wouldn't put my feet up, don't worry." She told him. He then started the car and began to drive off.
The map was open on her lap and she studied it and realized something was wrong. "Umm Lucifer, LA is that way."
"I know, but Vegas is this way." He answered her. "I think we need to recharge our batteries before… that."
He didn't need to finish his sentence. She knew and full heartedly agreed.
Fun times before heading back.
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