"What sort of lawyer?" asked Harry.
"I don't think the Ministry of Magic or the Wizengamot deals with this sort of thing," Sirius replied. "This we might handle in Muggle court, actually. So we'll need to look up a family lawyer. Griphook, take us to Vault 711, please."
"I'm afraid I don't see the point," said Griphook. "Muggle lawyers are paid in checks, not gold. We can give you a Gringotts checkbook."
"How can I give a Muggle a check that says 'Gringotts' on it?" snapped Sirius.
"People do it all the time," Griphook told him. "They just tell the Muggle that Gringotts is a small, private bank, and that's why they've probably never heard of it. Besides, we have checks with cute puppies on them."
"Oh…all right, then," said Sirius. "Harry, do you want to take some gold for the road?"
Harry nodded, and Sirius helped him sweep some of his parents' gold into a bag. Then Sirius grabbed James's will, Harry grabbed his money bag and the Marauders' Map, and all three of them got into the cart, which sped along until they were finally out of the labyrinthine tunnel system and out in the sunlight.
"I didn't want to tell Griphook, because it was a bit embarrassing, but I actually rather like this checkbook," said Sirius, looking at the puppies fondly.
"Liking puppies is nothing to feel ashamed of," said Harry wisely. "Are you an animal person?"
"Yes," said Sirius. "Care of Magical Creatures was my favorite class at Hogwarts. Animals seem to be sort of instinctively drawn to me. I'm drawn to them, too, and we get along well."
"Can I buy something in Diagon Alley?" Harry asked hopefully, looking around at all the shops longingly. "You know, now that I have my wizard gold with me?"
"There's really no point," said Sirius. "Your list of school supplies won't arrive for another month. I can take you shopping then."
…
When Sirius and Harry arrived back at the Dursleys', it was almost dinnertime. Harry wanted Sirius to stay for dinner, but he was afraid Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia would be rude to Sirius. Meanwhile, they needed to find a Muggle family lawyer. Harry picked up the phone book and he and Sirius took it upstairs to Harry's room. Sirius cast a spell to make the room soundproof, just in case one of the Dursleys walked by.
"All right," said Sirius. "Can you explain this to me?"
Harry never thought he would have to teach someone how to use a telephone. He unplugged the one in Dudley's room and temporarily brought it into his own.
"So each phone has a number assigned to it, and when you dial that number, the person who has that phone will either answer it or, if they don't, you can leave a voice message," Harry began as Sirius nodded. "If someone calls you, it rings."
The phone wasn't plugged in, so Harry showed Sirius how to dial the phone, then had him practice on his own. Sirius got the hang of it quickly.
"This is weird," he said, "but not so hard."
"How do wizards communicate if they don't have telephones?" Harry asked.
"We use the fireplace, mostly," said Sirius, and he explained about Floo powder. Harry was amazed.
"You don't get burned?" said Harry.
"No." Sirius laughed. "But I reckon we should get a move on."
"Yeah, let's look up our lawyer," Harry added.
Harry helped Sirius navigate the yellow pages until they finally found a likely-looking law firm.
"Bunsen and Barnes, LLP," Sirius read. "Specializing in family law since 1924."
Harry and Sirius both agreed that it should be an adult talking on the phone, so Sirius practiced calling Bunsen and Barnes until he was 100% sure he had it down flat, and then Harry plugged the phone into the wall (Sirius was also watching this with interest; Harry had to explain that the phone wouldn't work unless its cord was plugged into the wall.)
"Remember, Sirius, you don't need to shout or anything," said Harry. "It's probably going to be a secretary who answers, so speak to her like she's standing next to you, not like she's on the other side of the planet."
"Bunsen and Barnes, LLP, my name is Barbara, how can I help you?" said the secretary, as Harry pressed the speakerphone button.
"Hello, Barbara," said Sirius, sounding a little nervous. Harry took the receiver away from his godfather's ear—now that it was on speakerphone, Sirius could just talk freely, and Harry could hear Bunsen and Barnes. "I was hoping I could find someone to help me with a custody case."
"I'll put you through to someone," said Barbara, and easy-listening hold music started playing in the background.
"What's this?" Sirius looked alarmed.
"Relax," said Harry. "She's just transferring you over to a lawyer."
When the lawyer answered, introducing himself as Bernard Glacier, Esquire, Sirius gave him a slightly modified, magic-free version of the case. Harry spoke too.
"So let me just make sure I've got it all down," said Mr. Glacier. "You were falsely imprisoned for your godson's parents' murder ten years ago, and just managed to get out now. Meanwhile, Mr. Potter has been placed with his aunt and uncle, but upon reuniting with him and looking over his father's Last Will and Testament, you have found that his parents have willed custody of him to you?"
"Yes," said Sirius. "Also, his aunt and uncle were abusive, so I'm hoping we can get him away from this house quickly."
"Abuse?" Mr. Glacier sounded concerned. "I didn't know we were dealing with domestic violence."
"Well, they don't hit me, at least not really that hard, or often," said Harry, and Sirius frowned.
"It's extreme neglect, Mr. Glacier," Sirius told the attorney solemnly. "Any pediatrician will tell you he's very behind on the growth curve due to malnutrition. They treat him like vermin, Mr. Glacier, and it needs to stop. Surely you also understand that emotional abuse hurts just as much as if they hit him."
"Of course I do," said Mr. Glacier. "How old are you, Mr. Potter?"
"Ten," Harry told him. "But I'll be eleven soon."
"This is why I decided to work in family law, you know," said Mr. Glacier, and he sounded angry. "I wanted to help children like you escape harmful environments like your aunt and uncle's house—and I'm sure you and your godfather would both want your parents' final wishes honored. Are you planning on filing suit against your relatives, Mr. Potter?"
"Yes, he is," said Sirius firmly, before Harry could say anything.
"It's not as easy to find proof for emotional abuse," Mr. Glacier warned them. "Mr. Potter will have to take a psychiatric exam for sure, although he may be required to have a physical as well…Is there anyone else who can provide evidence? Neighbors? Teachers?"
"I'm sure the teachers have noticed something's wrong," said Sirius. "Also, I know one of his neighbors, Arabella Figg."
"You know—?" Harry began in shock, but Sirius put a finger to his lips.
"Well, Mr. Black, since you have written proof that Mr. Potter is supposed to be in your care, this case shouldn't be too much of a struggle," said Mr. Glacier. "And remember, you can't sue for damages until your relatives have lost custody. Could I meet you in my office sometime soon? Does noon this Thursday work?"
"I'll miss school," said Harry. He didn't want to go to school, but he thought he would get in trouble if he didn't go.
"Mr. Black has your power-of-attorney," said Mr. Glacier. "So he can write a note excusing you from class."
"Very well; we'll see you then," said Sirius. Once he had hung up the phone, Harry turned to Sirius.
"How do you know Mrs. Figg?" he asked.
"She's a Squib," explained Sirius. "That means she comes from a wizard family, but she has no magic powers. She lived nearby us when I was younger, in London."
"Small world," said Harry, and Sirius nodded.
…
On Thursday, Harry went into school, but Sirius had him give the principal a note around noon, one that would get him out of the rest of the day. When Harry walked out of the building after eating lunch, he noticed Sirius waiting outside on his motorcycle.
"Mr. Glacier's office is in London," said Sirius. "So we'd better get going."
Harry got on the back of the motorcycle, excited to fly on it again. But before they could take off, both of them were taken by surprise. Someone had just appeared out of thin air, and the long silver hair and beard, half-moon glasses, and bright blue eyes were unmistakable.