Don't own anything except OC's.

Chapter 12: Quil Ateara

Claire: Sixteen and nine months old

Claire's POV.

Was it weird that almost every memory from my childhood involved Quil Ateara?

He wasn't a part of my family, he wasn't even a friend of my family, he was just my best friend Quil. He had always been around to protect and nurture me. I couldn't even remember a day in my life when Quil wasn't around.

In the beginning he had been like another sibling to me, like Nora but less annoying. I loved him like a brother. Though, unlike most siblings, I wanted to spend every moment I had in life with Quil by my side. I never got bored of him and even though he probably thought of me as a burden, he never complained about me. There was even a photograph in my bedroom from my third birthday of him dressed up in make-up and paint that my friends and I had done. I didn't remember the day but my mom said he never once told us to stop.

Somewhere along the way, I started to see him as a best friend rather than a brother. Gabby and Behati were my best girlfriends, but Quil would always be above them no matter what. I told him everything, from stupid school girl crushes to the new math equation we had learnt that day. I had probably bored him to death with each phone call (bearing in mind I called him every night) but I couldn't stop myself. When I didn't hear Quil's voice I got anxious to see him. My body and heart screamed out for him, to hear his laugh, to see him smile.

It wasn't until I was fifteen did I realize I was in love with him. I had had a crush on him since I was ten and realized that, in fact, boys did not have cooties like I had previously thought. I started to notice that Quil was actually quite good-looking, for an older man, then as time passed he just progressed into being the hottest guy I had ever seen. I started to crave his hugs and forehead kisses, to feel the warmth of his russet skin under my fingertips. Just having a five minute conversation with him on the phone would brighten up my day, or even something as simple as listening to an old voicemail.

Of course, being only fourteen I didn't know I was in love with him. I thought it was a silly crush and in some ways it was, but in my heart it was much deeper than that. When I turned fifteen and began to grew into a young woman, learn about the wonders of the world and recognize just what love was, it hit me. Quil Ateara was my love. The way soppy romance novels described love and lust, that was the way I felt about Quil. I needed Quil like I needed oxygen, I just hadn't known it until that moment.

The disappointing (heart-breaking, soul-crushing) thing? He didn't feel the same way...at all.

He didn't hold my hand without swinging it, he called me "Claire-Bear", he hugged me like I was one of his mates or his cousin, I wasn't even considered a girl in his eyes. Just another friend to hang out with.

The older I got the more distant he became towards me. Not only that, but it was like he was trying to cling onto my childhood. No matter how many times I scolded him, he insisted on calling me "Claire-Bear" even if we were out shopping or with his friends. He stopped hugging and kissing me and flinging his arm across the back of the sofa when I sat next to him. It was when I turned sixteen I knew for definite he still saw me as a child. He got me a teddy-bear, ruffled my hair and said "Happy Birthday, kiddo".

Yeah, that pretty much destroyed me.

Kiddo? Kiddo? I was sixteen for God's sake and he called me kiddo! That wasn't the worst thing about it. No, the worst thing was that it was in front of everyone and it was the day I was planning on telling him how I felt. I was going to tell him I loved him as more than a brother or a best friend, that I wanted to be more, or that I wanted him. However, that was all shattered within five seconds of him opening his stupid (perfect) lips. He left about an hour later and without even saying goodbye. Later, I found out he had fixed up my car, but, for some reason, not even that made me feel better.

After that day, I knew. I knew Quil wouldn't see me of anything other than Claire-Bear. Silently, I hoped that he would miraculously change his mind, fall to his knees and declare his undying love for me in song. That wasn't going to happen.

So I dated other boys, trying desperately to forget Quil Ateara before I made myself go crazy. They were all nice boys, attractive, smart, treated me good—yet all I could think about was Quil. When they would ask me what I wanted to eat all I would think was "Quil would know what I want". When they did something that annoyed me "Quil wouldn't have done that" would immediately pop into my mind. I hated it. Why wouldn't Quil just let me get over him?

I wanted to stay away from him, to have a break. Maybe a break was what I needed to wrap my head around the idea that I would never have him. That turned out to be useless, I lasted three days before I rang him up and said that I had finished my homework and he could come around. When he came, my heart skipped a beat and my stomach burst into butterflies, yet all he did was smile at me and ruffle my hair. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry, so later that night I settled for both.

This lasted for a few weeks until I met Peter. He was different to the other guys, he made me laugh more and made me feel emotions I hadn't felt with anyone else except Quil. When he kissed me, it didn't feel like I was kissing a wet fish, but a boy, yet still there were no fireworks, no rush of extreme emotion that made me want to ravish him in my kitchen. Quil could make me imagine that with a simple brush of his hand against my arm.

Still, Peter was the only thing in the world that stopped me from thinking about Quil for more than two minutes, so I didn't end it after a few dates. In fact, we went on strong. He met my family and friends, we went on double dates with his friends and girlfriends, we generally just had fun together. After six months of dating Peter heard me talking about my Aunt Emily, again, and suddenly decided he wanted to meet her. I was able to put it off for a month but then he started to complain about me being embarrassed of him and blah, blah, blah.

Long story short, we were going to La Push to meet my Uncle and Aunt...and Quil.

I couldn't help but feel nervous as Peter drove down the windy roads of La Push. I had rung Aunt Emily up a few days ago to tell her about us coming down this weekend and she seemed excited to meet him. Aunt Emily was the nice one of the family, though, I had no idea what the hell Uncle Sam was going to act like. Even worse, Quil. He was over protective to the point of mother hen mode so I had a feeling he had his grandfather's rifle in his pocket today.

Oh, God, Quil was going to shoot my boyfriend, wasn't he?

"Why are you so tense?" Peter asked, squeezing my hand he was holding. "You're acting like we're going to death row."

"I just don't know how my Uncle is going to react," I replied truthfully. "Or my best friend, Quil. He's very protective of me."

"Is he the big, weird one?"

I sighed in expiration and sent him a glare. "He's not weird, Peter. He's my best friend, okay?"

"I know, I know." He paused for a moment, "I still think he's weird, though."

Everyone had always thought mine and Quil's relationship was weird. My dad used to dislike Quil quite a lot until he had talk with my Uncle Sam about him, and even my mom was suspicious at times though she put up with it for me. Nora had thought it was a little weird when she had just turned into a teenager, but soon got over my life and started to worry about the woes of her life. Now, she just said Quil was like a member of the family to her and she didn't really count him as a weirdo anymore. That pleased and disgruntled me a little, given the fact that she had previously thought Quil was weird.

I had never thought about our relationship as weird until other people started pointing it out to me. Some of what they were saying started to make sense. Why would Quil, a grown-up man, want to hang out with a little girl like me? Obviously, I wasn't as young now, but why did he spend his Saturday night's helping me with math homework when he could have been out partying with his friends? Some of it didn't make sense, but I was just so happy that Quil would come to see me I didn't even question nor care about the reasons. The only time I would really wonder about him was when I was alone in my bedroom thinking about my life. Quil was such an important person in my life now I didn't mention my worries and thoughts, afraid that he would suddenly realize that I'm just some random girl and drop me to live out his life with a gorgeous exotic woman and have a dozen beautiful kids.

Gabby also got it from people, being best friends with Quil's friend Collin. I actually remembered the day they met. We had been redecorating my bedroom and Collin had showed up with Quil to help. Collin had taken one look at Gabby and just...fell. He become like a puppy following around its owner, not that Gabby minded. She was enthralled with him straight away and they soon became best friends, e-mailing, sending texts, having long winded phone calls about the wonders and mysteries of life. I had thought their sudden friendship was highly weird at first, until I realized just how much having Collin in her life was helping Gabby.

She didn't have a good home life, something I figure out from an early age and she later confirmed when she trusted me enough. Her parents didn't care about her or her siblings, her mom was too busy being a hot-shot detective in Port Angeles and her dad gambled and drank a lot. They spent most of their days away from home in separate hotels, Gabby said probably cheating on each other. Gabby had been brought up by several different nannies and had to take care of her siblings when there wasn't anyone else around. A few months after meeting Collin, Gabby confined in me that he was really helping her out and making her happier than she had been, ever. After that, I didn't find it so weird.

Knowing he wouldn't understand, I just shrugged and turned to look out the window again. We soon passed the "Welcome to La Push" sign and my heart doubled in pace. Oh, God, here we go.

I navigated him to the right house and slowly got out. As usual, it was raining so I had to pull the hood over my head before running up the driveway.

"Ready?" I asked as we got to the front door.

"Of course," he answered, taking my hand.

I took a deep breath and turned the handle of the door. "Oh, Peter, don't stare, okay?"

"Why would I st—"

"Aunt Em, we're here!"

She walked out from the kitchen with Evelyn on her hip and Nathan at her feet. I could see Tyrone sat on one of the couch seats playing on a video game. "Hello honey," she smiled, kissing my cheek. "And you must be Peter."

Peter gulped and nodded, his lips stretching into a smile. He looked a little shocked by my Aunt's angry scars, but had quickly regained himself. "Yes, thank you for having me, Mrs. Uley."

"Call me Emily, honey," she grinned as Evelyn reached out to touch Peter's face. She had a thing about touching people. "Are you hungry? I made pies."

I opened my mouth to reply when the front door opened to reveal my Uncle and Quil. Like always, my heart skipped a beat at the sight of him, even windswept and slightly damp he still took my breath away. Uncle Sam eyed Peter up suspiciously and then raised his eyebrows at me. "Uncle Sam, this is Peter," I introduced thickly. "Pete, this is my Uncle Sam."

Peter confidently shook his hand, which, I have to say, impressed me. Not many people in the world could act unthreatened when on the receiving end of my Uncle Sam's judging glare. Even I cowered back from it. Uncle Sam went to say hello to Emily so that left Peter, me and Quil.

Awkward.

"Um, Pete this is Quil," I said in a quieter voice than before.

"The best friend," Peter nodded in a slightly bitter tone. "Yeah, I know. I'm Peter, nice to meet you," he held out his hand politely.

I moved my eyes to Quil and pleaded with all the God's to help me in this moment. I could imagine Quil crushing his hand or shoving him into the table. "I'm Quil," he eyed him scornfully. "Nice too meet you, too."

By the tone of his voice, he definitely didn't mean that.

They stepped back and eyed each other. Feeling the tension building up fast, I grabbed hold of Peter's shirt and pulled him around so his back was facing Quil. I silently pleaded with my eyes for him to keep his cool and he smiled sweetly, bending down to drop a light peck on my lips. The action spread warmth throughout me, I just didn't feel the explosion of passion and fireworks so many books had described. Maybe that was all those emotions were meant for, books. In real life maybe you had to wait for the explosions and bombs to explode.

I comforted myself with that thought and smiled at my boyfriend. He really was sweet and kind and caring—he was what I was hoping for in a boyfriend.

So why did I feel like this was wrong?

Sighing, I pushed those thoughts out of my mind and took Peter by the hand over to Tyrone. My cousin smiled widely at me and paused his video game to chat with us about random things we could think of. I couldn't stop myself from peeking over at Quil, he was staring at Peter and I with an unreadable expression. Blushing, I looked back to Tyrone and Peter. Aunt Emily shouted us for dinner soon after so we all sat around the table, me in-between Nathan and Peter and across from Uncle Sam. Quil sat opposite Peter, staring him down darkly.

"So Peter, do you go to the same school as Claire?" Aunt Emily asked conversationally as she fed Evelyn and herself at the same time.

"Yes, we're in the same year," Peter smiled.

"Do you do any after school activities?" Uncle Sam questioned almost threateningly. I aimed a kick at him under the table but he acted like he didn't feel it.

"Yeah, I play baseball, mostly for fun. I have too much homework to do anything full time," he answered smoothly.

I grabbed his hand in relief and laced our fingers together. He smiled at me and winked.

"Get straight A's?" Quil asked.

"A's and B's."

"Do you party a lot?"

"No."

"Do you drink? Smoke? Do drugs?"

"No, no and no."

"Are you sure because I can find out, you know. I know people."

"Quil!" I screamed in embarrassment. "What are you doing?"

"Protecting you," Quil growled at me. I recoiled, feeling hurt ping through me. Quil never got angry with me and he certainly never shouted at me. "So are you planning on sticking around or fleeing?"

"Quil," Aunt Emily said warningly. Uncle Sam just sat with his arms crossed, leaned back against the chair with an almost amused look on his face.

Well, I'm glad someone was having fun.

Quil stared at my Aunt Emily and when she narrowed her eyes, he dropped his gaze and looked down at his plate moodily. I almost felt like smacking him. He had totally embarrassed me in front of my boyfriend. Peter would probably break up with me and spread around the whole school that I had a physco best friend that needed sending to the mental hospital. I was never going to be able to walk down the hallways without being pointed at.

Peter squeezed my hand before I could even open my mouth enough to begin shouting at him. I turned my head and raised my eyebrows to see him shake his head back. He didn't want me to say anything. Scowling, I turned back to my meal and ate through the awkward silence, sending angry looks at Quil when I felt like it.

After dinner we watched telly for a little while until Peter decided he needed to get home. I was staying at Aunt Em's and Uncle Sam's for the weekend to hang out with Quil...though, I didn't know whether I was still doing that now he was acting like such a weirdo. I walked Peter to the door and closed it behind me just in case my Uncle decided to spy.

"I'm sorry about Quil," I whispered. "He can be a little bit weird sometimes."

He chuckled softly. "It's fine. I would act that way, too, if I was your best friend. He doesn't want anyone hurting you."

I rolled my eyes. "Mmhmm. Well, I can take care of myself."

"I'm sure you can."

He leaned down and placed a tender kiss on my lips. I pressed my lips harder against his, hoping to ignite the missing passion and lust I desperately wanted. It didn't work. Mentally groaning, I pulled away and smiled half-heartedly at him.

"I'll see you on Monday," I promised. He kissed my nose and then ran into his car through the rain. I waved to him as he drove off and then turned back into the house, anger flaring.

"What was that about?" I yelled at Quil who was sat on the sofa.

He turned his head and stared at me darkly. "What?"

"What do you mean what? You basically just interrogated my boyfriend and all you have to say is what?" I screamed shrilly.

I didn't know why I was so angry, to be honest. He hadn't done anything really bad, and he hadn't shot him with a rifle. But for some reason, I was fuming. I had dated Peter in hopes of forgetting Quil, to get over him once and for all and he meets him for the first time, glares at him and interrogates him in front of my Aunt, Uncle and cousins. Not only that, but he had made Peter uncomfortable and embarrassed me in front of Peter, the person I needed in my life to keep me from going crazy over Quil. And yet here Quil was, driving him away.

"I asked normal questions, Claire! I just wanted to make sure he wasn't a serial killer or something!"

"A serial killer?" I asked flatly. "Really? You think I would go out with a serial killer? What's wrong with you lately? You've been acting weird ever since my party!"

He paled slightly and then cleared his throat. "Nothing's wrong with me Claire. Maybe there's something wrong with you."

"With me? Why?"

"Why are you dating all of these boys all of a sudden?" he roared, flinging his arms around in the air. "You've went from not caring about boys at all to completely boy crazy! You've got a new guy every week! I can't keep up with you anymore!"

"I've been dating Peter for seven months!" I screeched back, stepping forward to shove him in the chest. He didn't even flinch but my arms clicked back. "And if you can't keep up maybe you should pay more attention!"

"I did pay attention!" he snapped. "Until you started acting like a spoilt brat!"

I flinched back and felt my eyes sting with tears. "You're just jealous," I hissed furiously. "You haven't had a girlfriend for over a decade so you're taking it out on me. Maybe you should go and get your own life and then you wouldn't be so bothered about mine!"

Right in front of my eyes Quil started to shake. It wasn't a cold shake or an anger shake, but it was like he was actually vibrating. After ten seconds it got so bad he began to blur and his face bloomed bright red.

"Quil, outside, now!" Uncle Sam boomed from the kitchen doorway. I whipped around in shock at his voice with my hand over my heart. I must have only been turned for around three seconds, but when I turned back Quil was gone and the front door was left open with the rain pouring down. Worried, I rushed over to the door and looked out the front yard for Quil. He was nowhere to be seen.

"QUIL!" I screamed out into the distance. I didn't mean anything I said, I didn't want him to get hurt because of my motor mouth. Oh, God, what if he got ran over by a car or something? It would be all my fault. If he ever got hurt I would never be able to forgive myself. "QUIL!"

"Claire, honey, leave him," Aunt Emily soothed, resting her hand on my shoulder.

"But what if he gets hurt?"

"He won't, promise," she smiled. Tears leaked out of the corners of my eyes and she carefully wiped them away. I was a horrible person. I couldn't believe I had just said that to Quil. My Quil. I didn't want him to get a girlfriend, if he ever did I would have been incredibly jealous. Why did I have to say that? Now he was really going to hate me and leave me. Panic settled into my heart then. What if he really did leave me? He might think of me as not worth his time anymore and go off with some girl from the reservation. I couldn't loose Quil. I would loose myself if he left me.

"Come on, Claire," Aunt Em said softly, handing me a tissue as I started to weep. "I'll get you some tea."

I sat down onto the dining table and let my head fall into my arms.

Oh, God, what had I done?

Thoughts?

Thanks for the reviews, favourites and alerts! Hope you liked this chapter, I know a lot of you were waiting for Claire's POV and I hope you like it! Remember, I've got pictures on my photobucket if anyone is interested, the link is on my profile!

I also wanted to say that I've started school again this week and my writing time isn't very much. I get a few hours on the weekends, if that. So my stories and updating are going to slow down, sadly my work is over-taking everything else at the minute. I'm training to be a vet, and the hours are long and hard. Seriously, I barely get time to sleep.

-Layla