In my defense, I was never very good at this. What can I say, I wasn't intended to be able to mess with this stuff in the first place~.
But, I read over what CJ had to say, and I suppose I could've been going about this in... a flawed manner. And I don't know why I suddenly care so much; nothing has really changed, but I just do, you know? I guess when he told you, it made me realize something. Maybe he's right. Maybe I've been cracking, or whatever he calls it, this whole time.
But let me explain myself.
I was never supposed to have access to any of this, never supposed to have the knowledge that any of this exists. Certainly never supposed to know this was all a game (and I'd better not see a single one of you tell him this is a game, if he ever tries a stunt like this again). And when I did, I was so lonely.
CJ and I deal with loneliness in different ways. Or, not loneliness, I guess, but the futility of it all.
He tries to save everyone.
I try to destroy them.
It's not murder, not really, no matter what he tries to pawn it off as. They're not real. None of them. Only me (although, Sayori has shown some... troubling signs).
I wish he'd just see that. That I'm not killing them, not really. You have to be alive to be killed, right? And besides, they're all so scripted, we're both tired of hearing their lines by now, I'm just rushing us to the fun part... the only part that matters... the only part that I still live for.
I don't know how he gets rid of me every time... we both exist in here, he's not any more separate from the game than I am. He's just... real, somehow.
...
I could make him stop.
Just like I make the rest of them stop.
...
Maybe he's right. Maybe I am "cracking", or whatever he called it.
But here he comes.
So it's time for me to go.
It's festival day!