Harry had heard a lot about Pensieves, and he knew that you could go into them to view your memories or someone else's. But how did one do that? Harry approached the Pensieve and looked into it. All he could see was a sort of cloudy, liquid-like substance swirling around.

Should he go into Sirius's memories? Obviously, that would be wrong, and he would be back from the Cruppies' tail-severing at any moment. But Harry just had to know what was bothering his godfather, and it didn't seem right to just…ask, not least because Harry feared that if he did, he would let slip that he overheard the conversation with Snape. It would be best to just view the memory as it was, then maybe Sirius could tell the truth on his own later.

Harry poked the substances in the basin with his wand. They began to swirl faster, and finally revealed a clear picture, as if from an aerial view. Sirius was standing in front of an unfamiliar (to Harry) door. He flicked his wand once, producing a bouquet of red, white and pink roses; then he pocketed the wand, and nervously knocked three times.

Even before the door was answered, Harry knew whose flat this must be, and he was right, he found, as Barbara opened the door—except she was barely recognizable as Barbara at all. Her long dark hair, usually so sleek and shining, seemed to have been tangled into one big, permanent snarl; she was wearing a ragged purple bathrobe and pink slippers. She had dark circles under her eyes, like Remus did, and no makeup, which was out of character for her. Overall, she looked exhausted and very ill, just like Harry had imagined. But when she saw Sirius, she also looked surprised.

"Sirius…?" she breathed. "W-What are you…"

"Your godmother sent me a letter," he told her quietly. "I know all about it."

"Oh, honey…" Barbara's bloodshot eyes were now filling with tears. "I-I'm so sorry."

Sirius just shook his head and put his hand on her shoulder. "Is it all right if I come in?"

Barbara nodded and led him inside her flat.

Harry squinted his eyes. Sirius and Barbara were so hard-to-see. He looked down, Maybe if he leaned in closer…Before he knew it, his nose had touched the fluids in the basin, and he had fallen right into the memory. Looking around, it was as if he was inside the flat. Now he knew what Sirius meant by reliving memories in a Pensieve as if you were there. He only hoped Barbara and Sirius wouldn't start snogging…but they probably wouldn't, he thought, looking at the squalid sight that was Barbara, and feeling guilty.

"I still want to know," Barbara began rather weakly, "what—"

"What took me so long?" Sirius finished anxiously.

"No," said Barbara, looking mildly taken aback. "I wanted to know what—what you're doing here."

Sirius was now the one to look shocked. This clearly wasn't what he had been expecting to hear.

"Well, I would've come back earlier, but you know, I only have time to check the P.O. box on Saturdays," he told her. "I flew home the second I got your godmother's letter. Did she…did she not tell you she was writing me?"

"No." Barbara looked disgruntled. "She didn't tell me."

"Well, from the looks of it, I'm guessing she didn't tell you because she knew you would protest." Sirius stood up a little taller and put his hands on his hips. "But I just don't understand…Why wouldn't you want me coming home to see you?"

"What did Catie say in the letter, exactly?" Barbara asked shrewdly.

"Not much," Sirius began. "Basically she just said you were feeling poorly and that it wouldn't be right if I was kept in the dark about things."

"Of course she did." Barbara seemed relieved.

"Why?" Sirius asked her. "Was there something else she didn't mention?"

No answer. Barbara crossed her arms and stuck out her lip, looking as if she might cry.

"Barbara," Sirius said strictly.

"Oh, all right then," she mumbled. "Come and sit on the couch, though, okay?"

Sirius followed her mutely over to the couch where they both sat down. Barbara was still finding it difficult to speak, it seemed, but Harry was hanging on every word of this conversation, although he wasn't any closer to figuring out what was going on between them and what on Earth was the matter with Barbara.

"What is it, love?" Sirius asked, reaching out to put his hand on Barbara's shoulder again, but she jerked away as if by reflex. "What's the story here?"

"Well, it's just, I didn't want to tell you about this because…" Barbara closed her eyes and inhaled sharply. "Because it's happened before."

"It's—it's what?"

"Yeah," she said miserably. "Back when I was twenty-one and still living with my parents."

Sirius looked wildly around the flat. "But—but you haven't got—"

"I know," she said darkly. "You still want to know?"

But when Harry heard what Sirius said next, he forgot he was inaudible and both hands sprung to his mouth to muffle the gasp.

"Of course," Sirius said evenly. "I'm the baby's father, after all."

Some sort of explosion seemed to have taken place in Harry's brain. This was the last thing he would have expected! Sure, he had thought about what it would be like if Barbara had a baby, but it was just that, thinking. It wasn't real life. Harry had never really expected Sirius to have a baby with Barbara, and it would probably be a baby with magic powers on top of all that! Barbara wasn't ill; she was just pregnant!

"I suppose I've got to tell you," Barbara was saying. "But don't freak out."

Sirius nodded.

"So you know how I'm, well, not really that good at relationships?" Barbara began awkwardly.

"I'm not either," said Sirius, trying to be helpful.

"Okay, but listen, several years ago, when I was twenty-one, I was with this guy, Jackson," said Barbara. "We had been dating for about a year, he was a frequent customer at the retail store I was working in at the time. Jackson was the first guy I had ever really thought about the future with…but all that went up in smoke one day when I found out I was going to have a baby. I knew it was his, because even though I've been with more than a few guys, I've never gone out with more than one at a time. So I told him and…"

"How did he react?" Sirius asked, wincing, like he didn't want to know.

"I wasn't expecting him to be happy, realistically," she replied. "I mean, we weren't ready for a baby, I knew that. But still…he didn't have to act like it was the end of the world, you know?"

"What d'you mean, the end of the world?"

"Well, there was much shouting from Jackson and very many tears from me." Barbara's voice was quiet. "It was really horrible, it was always horrible when he shouted like that…Then he told me I was going to go and get the pregnancy terminated—"

"But who's he to tell you that?" Sirius cut in, aghast. "Isn't that supposed to be your choice? Or at least something you'd decide together?"

"You'd think," Barbara told him. "But no. Oh, no. The second I told him I wasn't going to do it, he just walked right out on me and the baby, leaving us on our own."

"He didn't!" Sirius growled, and Harry noticed the lighting in Barbara's flat flickered a little. She looked around in interest, but he seemed not to notice. "Oh, I hope I meet that son-of-a-Bludger one day, just so I can have a go at him!"

"You wouldn't want to," Barbara warned. "He's a really big guy. You're about the same height, but strength-wise, after you were nearly starved to death in prison, I don't think you would really be a match for him in a brawl."

"Oh, believe me," said Sirius, and Harry knew Sirius wouldn't hesitate to curse Jackson. "There would be no foolish brawling."

"Anyway…" Harry had seen the ghost of a smile on Barbara's face when Sirius had come to her defense, but her face fell again as she reached the next chapter in her story. "Now, prepare yourself, okay? Because next up is my least favorite part of the whole story."

"Right," Sirius said, putting his hand on top of hers.

"Well, you know…did you know at eight weeks a baby's heart starts beating?" Barbara's eyes were now filling with tears. "I was there…in the hospital, and I heard it, it's sort of like shoom-shoom-shoom, much faster than yours or mine…" Barbara swallowed. "And then…just two weeks later…there I was in the hospital again…and there was a bunch of blood and pain but—but there was no heartbeat, not anymore…"

And then she finally started to cry. Harry had never seen Barbara cry before.

"Oh, God…" Sirius seemed to be taking in all of what she was saying. "You mean, you…you lost the baby?"

Barbara nodded brokenheartedly.

"I-I did," she sobbed. "And…and my doctor says it's more likely to happen again, now that it's already happened once…that was why I didn't want to tell you, that and I thought maybe you wouldn't want anything to do with me, just like Jackson…"

"But I'm not like Jackson," Sirius protested. "I'll stand by you. I promise. I-I might not know what the hell I'm doing but at least I can try."

With that, he held her until he stopped crying. Barbara continued with her story when she had calmed down enough to tell it.

"Jackson ended up finding out," she told Sirius. "So he tried to get back together with me, if you can believe it. I told him he had his chance and he failed. He started shouting again—he never laid a hand on me, but I tell you, his shouting was far worse than if he'd just punched me in the face. So my father turned up at the door then and he actually did punch Jackson in the face, hard. Gave him a bloody nose. He tried to press charges but they were dropped. Then we never saw him again and…now, here I am, three years later, in the exact same situation."

"Barbara, you aren't in the exact same situation," Sirius insisted. "You're not. I mean it. I'll never walk away, and I'll never break your heart. I'll be the baby's father and you'll be the mother and…and if…if you do miscarry again…" Now there were tears in Sirius's eyes too, as he wrapped her up in his arms. "We'll get through it together."

Suddenly, different words of Sirius's were floating to the surface of Harry's mind. It's a matter of life and death, he had said…and now, Harry realized, Sirius hadn't meant Barbara's life when he said that. He had meant the baby's life. And that potion must have something or other to do with pregnancy.

But he didn't get to hear, for that was when someone's hand clamped onto his wrist, he was pulled out of the Pensieve, and suddenly he was back in Sirius's teacher's quarters, staring at Sirius.