The night before...

Negan had finally finished. Coming inside of her, he stiffened behind her, gasping for breath against her neck before kissing her cheek. Pulling out of her, he rolled her over to face him and smiled a lazy grin. They laid in darkness as he gently brushed some of her hair behind her ear. "Get some sleep baby, the doc is coming in the morning to check you out." Lucy prayed that whatever Harlan would say it would be good news. If he demanded her to be on bedrest she would never get her chance. She kept expecting herself to psych out. To rethink what she was planning, and chicken out. Instead her mind kept going back to all of those times Negan raped her.

All of those times he yanked her legs apart and drove himself inside of her ruining any innocence she had. How he would be violent and rough, using her like an object, and murdering Chris before her very eyes. He was worse than those creatures out there. He was a monster. A crazy obsessive monster who put these babies inside of her and claimed he loved her. This wasn't love, it was lust. Thinking of two paths, she laid there staring at his dark eyes. She would die giving birth. Either the babies would die, or she would die.

Whatever happened at least she would be put out of her misery. If she turned she turned. At least she would finally be taken away from this Hell. She wasn't completely sure what she believed in, but she hoped if there was some sort of afterlife it would be peaceful, maybe with her parents, friends, and Chris. Maybe she could start all over again, far away from Negan forgetting the pain he caused her. Or she could just chicken out, give birth and life. If the babies didn't make it and didn't harm her she was sure Negan would try again, that is if he didn't blame her for his son's deaths, which she expected he would. If she lived and everything went fine she would then be a mother to two unwanted babies. Two things that were forcefully put inside of her and created. She didn't think any instincts would kick in. Instead she would be officially trapped. Either Negan would think she fulfilled her purpose and either get rid of her, or keep her around for more children. She would be forced to raise these babies, and stand next to this bastard.

She didn't think it was meant to be a long life, but she expected however long it would be...suicide would be a better choice. Lucy shut her eyes, drifting off into broken uneven sleep. It was just a few mere hours later that she heard Negan talking to her. At first she thought he was trying to wake her up and get a fuck in. Sometimes if he couldn't sleep it wouldn't matter what time of night he would jolt her out of a sound sleep and start pulling down her pants without any warning. In her sleep, she must have turned back over, back facing him. She felt his body laying close beside her. His hand gently rubbing her stomach. He was whispering. Lucy's eyes shot open, grateful she wasn't facing him. He was talking out loud.

"Please forgive me Lord...I have sinned. I began wanting to keep these people sleep and have lost sight of what I was sent here to do. What I've done to this girl is unforgivable but...I love her. I know it sounds crazy but I really do. The moment I laid eyes on her I knew I needed to have her, own her, control her. I know she'll never really love me and if I could turn back time I would, but please...please give me a chance to make things right. I'll never hurt or kill another woman. I'll only kill when it's right. I'll protect my men, and try to show Lucy what sort of man I can really be. Please, please keep my wife and babies safe. I swear to God I'll make things right...I swear..."

Lucy couldn't believe what she was hearing. Was this some sort of act? Was he thinking she was awake and listening? Was he praying? She could have sworn she heard him crying, his voice uneven.

"I love her so much...please...just please..."

He continued rubbing her stomach as Lucy laid completely still. Finally she heard him shift his weight, wrap his arm around her tightly. Laying there, she knew tomorrow was now or never.

Earlier that morning...

Lucy's eyelids fluttered open. Early sunlight was pouring in onto her. Her bladder felt full but not uncomfortable. Squinting, she shifted, turning over on her back where she saw Negan standing at the edge of the bed grinning. He was just wearing jeans. Hands on his hips, he stared down at her.

"Morning beautiful..."

Lucy blinked, about to ask what time it was when Negan leaned down, slowly pulling her pants off.

"I have to go to the bathroom..."

Negan ignored her. Any thoughts of the night before as he laid behind her speaking or praying out loud for forgiveness vanished instantly. Flinging her pants to the side, Negan had that same hunger in his eyes as he raised her ankles, lifting up her legs and dragging her to the edge of the bed. This was the first time he was going to fuck her in this position in a very long time. Instantly thoughts of her water breaking flashed before her mind. In panic, she shook her head trying to scoot back.

"Negan wait..."

But as always he didn't listen, Taking her ankles, he slid her back so her ass was almost up in the air and her legs were up on his shoulders. Unzipping his jeans, he knelt on the edge of the bed and worked himself out. Her large stomach blocked her view but she knew exactly what he was doing. Sighing, she laid back before he used his hand and guided himself inside of her. Not prepared, Lucy whimpered a small cry as Negan smiled and began pumping inward, one hand on her ankle up on his shoulder, the other resting against her stomach. Pumping into her, he smiled when suddenly a loud rapping came from the front door. Negan froze mid thrust before rolling his eyes.

"It's the doc he's early..."

Working his way out of her, he let her legs carefully drop before he reached down, handing her a small pile of clothes.

"Get to the bathroom and get dressed, you need help you yell all right sweetheart?"

Lucy laid there, still staring at him unable to process of she was annoyed or relieved. Smiling, he zipped himself up before standing and grabbing his shirt and jacket. Winking, he helped her off the bed. As Lucy dressed inside the tiny bathroom she caught her reflection just once. She looked pale and unhealthy. Not a glowing beautiful pregnant woman. She could hear Harlan and Negan speak outside. Sighing, she looked at herself and prayed everything would look okay so she could convince Negan to go for a walk to the quarry and hopefully all of this would end soon.

Later...

Negan and Lucy walked hand in hand in the woods. None of this area looked familiar, but she was sure they were close. It was a nice mid morning, the sun shinning as they walked through the old dried up crisp leafs. Negan held onto her hand tight, making sure she wouldn't trip over any roots. Together they walked in silence before Lucy glanced up at him. She figured she might as well keep playing along, making sure he didn't become suspicious.

"Is Negan your real name?"

She asked. Looking down at her as they walked he smiled faintly.

"It is. My father's name was Neil, my mother's name was Regan, they did a combo when they named me."

"It's different."

Negan smirked.

"Not as pretty as Lucille.

" Lucy rolled her eyes.

"I hate that name..."

"Why? It's real pretty."

"It sounds like an old lady..."

"Well my darling, I can tell you for sure you ain't no old lady...not at all."

Lucy sighed as Negan brought her hand up and kissed the top of it.

"I can't wait to see these babies Lucy, I sure hope they get their mamma's good looks."

"Yeah maybe..."

She muttered. Stopping, Negan pressed her up against a tree, grinning, he bent his head down, hand raising and grasping one of her breasts from on top of her shirt. Giving it a dull squeeze, he softly laughed and began to kiss her softly at first, then faster and faster.

"Get down on the ground, take your pants down..."

Negan whispered. Sighing, Lucy felt the babies shift inside of her, kicking gently as he heart began to race. Glancing over, she spotted it. Unable to believe her eyes. Just a few yards away was one of the edges of the quarry. She hadn't been on this side before, but nevertheless there it was. Staring at it, she saw it, the rocky ground, the steep drop, and how across the tree line. Gulping, she ignored Negan as he continued to kiss her, trying to lift up her shirt. Taking a deep breath she knew she couldn't chicken out. Smiling, she slowly with a bit of a struggle began to kick her pants down. Carefully, she laid down onto the grass as Negan started rubbing the bulge that had formed in the crotch of his jeans. Standing before her, he smiled before crawling down, yanking down his zipper as he laid down upon her. Laying there, trying to pray silently that this would be the last time, Lucy tilted her head backwards slightly in the grass and stared out at where the quarry was. So close, yet so far. She laid there as Negan lowered his head, kissing her as he spread her legs.

It would all be over soon... She closed her eyes, praying.