SUMMARY FOR CHAPTER FOUR: Dean (15), Sammy (10); John is sick of Dean treating Sammy like a baby. Dean finds it hard to defy his father in anything, except where his Sammy's safety is concerned. Sammy just wishes that he and Dean could stay together forever.

It was not the first time that Dean had been summoned by his father, John Winchester, to help with the family business. He had plenty of experience, over the course of his fifteen years, of playing back-up for his father. He had handled things like digging up graves to salt and burn the bones of a haunting spirit, or staking vampires in their daytime nests. But always before, Dean had been back with Sammy before it was time for the younger Winchester to go to sleep. Never had Sammy been left alone overnight, though the now ten year old boy swore it was long-past time that he was old enough to be left alone.

John, it seemed, now agreed with Sammy, much to the little boy's delight, and much to Dean's chagrin. Dean was to travel with John one state over, a mere three hundred or so miles, to exorcise a demon who had possessed the young son of a long-time friend of John. "Can't we all go, dad?" Dean asked for the thousandths time that morning. "I-I mean, wouldn't it be better for us all to be together?" Dean's face was ashen as he asked the questions to which he already knew the answer.

"Goddammit, Dean," John growled, tossing a half empty beer bottle in the vicinity of Dean's head as he packed his rucksack for the trip. If Dean hadn't been quick enough to catch it, he'd either be unconscious or on the wrong side of a big can of whoop-ass that John would have likely unleashed on him. "So help me if you ask me that one more time I'll…." John let the threat hang in the air heavier than the belt he frequently wielded on the backs of his sons when they dared to disobey him, or just generally piss him off, which was more often than they truly deserved. But John was in charge, after all, the only parent they had left.

Dean tried his level best not to flinch when John stared him down. He wanted to resist, to tighten his fingers into fists and tell his father that he wasn't leaving Sammy alone for an entire week, no way, no how. But Dean did as he always had and just dropped his eyes in submission with a half-hearted 'yessir, sorry' in reply. The last thing he needed to worry about was angering his father when he had to be alone with the man for the next week or more. He knew that their father had paid for their crummy motel room for two weeks in advance. Just as he knew that they would never get their money back if they all up and left before said two weeks were up. There would be no talking their dad into losing even the small pittance of funds he'd paid for the room. So there was nothing for it but for Dean to finish packing before John started reaching for his belt.

Dean grabbed Sammy and pulled him into the bathroom and shut the door. "Look," Sammy said, before Dean could even start with his 'this is for real…don't take any chances' speech. "I'm gonna be alright, Dean," Sammy said, confidence brimming with every word. Sam made the round of the bathroom, collecting Dean's toothbrush, some soap, the first aid kit, and anything else he thought his brother would need before they came back. Everything he collected, Sam tossed into an obliging plastic grocery sack, knowing that Dean would have just thrown everything into his duffle and would never have taken the time to fish it all out every day when he showered.

When Sammy turned around, grocery sack in the hand he held out to Dean, his big brother took it from his grasp, dropped it to the floor, and, before he could take a deep breath, Sammy found himself held tightly to Dean's chest. "You gotta promise me, Sammy," Dean said, not bothering to hide the pleading tone of his voice or the trembles that wracked his small body. "You gotta promise me to stay safe, Sammy," Dean begged. "I won't be here this time to take care of you."

"Oh Dean," Sammy sighed with some exasperation, even as his hands clutched Dean's faded t-shirt. "You know I can take care of myself."

"I know. I know, Sammy…'course you can," Dean agreed, not wanting to scare Sammy, even though he didn't believe a word of it. There was no way he wasn't going to worry himself into anemia over having to walk out the door of that motel room and leave his little brother all alone and unprotected. "Jesus, how does dad do this all the damn time?"

Dean didn't realize he'd even voiced the question aloud until Sammy hugged him tighter and sniffled a reply, "Because he don't love me like you do, Dean."

'Oh Jesus…oh God…he knows…even though I've never been able to tell him…how the hell can I leave him?' was the running diatribe in Dean's mind as he willed his arms to loosen and let go of the most precious thing in his world. Sammy took one slow step backwards, so loathe to leave the warmth and safety of his brother's arms. Dean was already all hard, muscular planes, where Sammy was still wiry with some baby softness to his body.

Sammy had never really had to do any fighting, whereas Dean was never able to stay away from it. If it wasn't helping their father fight monsters, it was street fighting to protect Sammy or bar brawls when hustling pool went horribly wrong. Dean was fearless…until today. Though he was trying so hard to keep Sammy from seeing it, Dean was terrified to leave Sammy alone and unprotected.

It was this day, this plain, unremarkable, drizzly Monday morning that would mean more to Sammy throughout his life than any other day he had known or would ever know. This was the day when Sammy truly knew that Dean loved him. Oh sure, Sammy had always known that Dean took care of him, did all the things he was told to do. But that was just it. Sammy thought that Dean did all of those things because he was told to do them. Sammy thought that Dean took care of him because he was told to take care of him.

But as Sammy realized that Dean had always been there for him, had always taken care of him and provided for him because Dean loved him, Sammy's heart lodged itself firmly in his throat and he couldn't speak…couldn't breathe. Dean bent to pick up the sack of toiletries that Sammy had gathered for him, taking a cursory look inside before pulling out their shared tube of toothpaste. "Don't think you're gettin' out of brushin' your teeth 'til I get back, Sammy," Dean huffed as he removed the toothpaste from the bag and placed it next to Sammy's toothbrush. "Every morning and every night. You know the rules."

Suddenly a small set of arms grabbed Dean around his waist from behind. "I'm sorry, Dean. I promise. I'll do everything just like you taught me." The tears were flowing freely from Sammy now and wetting the back of Dean's shirt. 'Just don't leave me, Dean. Don't go. What if you don't come back?' were the words that Sammy just couldn't say. He had shamed himself enough by crying. He wouldn't make this any harder for his brother than it already was.

"Hey, hey now, Sammy," Dean said, turning around in Sammy's arms. 'God he's so little' Dean thought to himself. "I'll be back before you know it," Dean promised. "You'll have the whole bed to yourself for once. And you can stay up as late as you want," Dean grinned, trying so hard to cheer Sammy up. But nothing was working. He had to see Sammy smile at him, just once. He would never be able to walk out of that bathroom and get into the Impala, the beautiful black vintage car that was home to them more than any motel room or rental house would ever be, if Sammy was crying.

So Dean did something that Sammy couldn't remember him ever doing before. Dean bent down and oh-so-gently kissed Sammy's tear-stained eyes. "Shhhh," Dean said softly between kisses. "You're gonna be fine, little man," Dean told him, the odd little nickname never failing to bring a smile to Sammy's face, just as it did now. "I'll be back before you know it. And I'll try to call you as often as I can," Dean promised. "You call Bobby if you have an emergency and he'll round up someone to come get you."

Sammy knew that they were a long way from Bobby's house, but Bobby's reach was pretty much nationwide. He had hunter friends in every state it seemed. So Sammy knew he could count on Bobby if he needed something. Sammy never once wondered who Dean could rely on. Dean was tough, smart, capable, everything that Sammy knew he was not. Dean could take care of himself. "Love you, Dee," Sammy whispered, just as Dean was about to release him from the tender hug. "Love you so, so much," he whispered again.

"DEAN!" their father's voice, like fingernails on a chalkboard cut into their private reverie. "If I have to come in there boy…." John threatened.

"Yeah, Sammy," Dean said quickly before releasing the younger. "Me too, little man. Me too."

And Dean was gone, out of the bathroom and out of the motel room before Sammy could force himself to move from where Dean had last been. Sammy knew that Dean had already re-salted the door and windows to the room so he didn't even waste a thought on that. Dean had already bought Sammy enough food to last a week if he was careful, but even with his tummy rumbling now, Sammy couldn't bear to leave the bathroom so soon after Dean had left him.

Some hours later, when Sammy was so tired that he couldn't stay standing in the bathroom any longer, he curled up on his and Dean's shared bed. His own side felt so empty and lonely now, so he rolled over to Dean's side, hugged the pillow that still smelled like Dean, and finally, Sammy slept fitfully, tossing and turning all night.

When he woke just before dawn, Sammy couldn't lay in the cold, empty bed any longer. So he got up, still dressed from the night before, and wandered aimlessly into the tiny kitchen to make some cereal. This being on his own wasn't all it was cracked up to be. He missed Dean so much, even this soon. Sammy pulled out the milk Dean had bought him and there was a note tied to the handle. Sammy sat the milk down and pulled the note away, unrolling it. It was from Dean. It had to be. Who else cared enough about him to leave a note?

"Sammy, this first time alone might be hard for you. Leaving you alone is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. But I left you something to hopefully make it easier. It's under my side of the mattress. Remember your promise to me to take care of yourself and I'll remember mine to you to come back soon. There's plenty of food and don't forget to call Bobby if you need anything."

Sammy ran to Dean side of the bed, breakfast already forgotten, and shoved his hand under the mattress. He pulled out another plastic grocery bag that Dean had obviously put there. Inside was the t-shirt Dean had last slept in, still full of the earthy, spiciness that was Dean and a small wad of cash, Dean's secret stash. Sammy yanked off his own t-shirt and pulled Dean's on as quickly as possible. He put away the precious few dollars that Dean had left him, swearing to not spend a single dollar of it. Then he pulled out Dean's note once again and re-read it all the way to the end. He had neglected to read the last sentence the first time, wanting to see what Dean had left him too badly. What he read now was infinitely more precious to Sammy than the old t-shirt he adored or even the money.

"I know I don't say it, little man, and I know you want to hear it, so here goes…I love you, Sammy…love you so damn much…you gotta know I do!"

Tears filled Sammy's eyes before falling onto the scrap of paper that was Dean's note. "Me too, Dee," Sammy whispered as he clutched the note tightly to his chest. "Me too." Such a reversal of roles would not be apparent to Sammy for many years to come. All Sammy knew was that he loved Dean, more than ever, and Dean loved him back.

No matter what the future held for them, whether together or alone, both Winchester boys knew that they had each other. And in end, what else would they ever need?

END